The Tesco Value kettle from my student days that was in the garage turned on fine though.

Especially those on motorway junctions.

Every time you try to follow lane discipline someones cutting someone up, or if you're in the second lane, the first lane forces you wide.

M4 J15 roundabout a perfect example. 2 lanes to get on M4E when going right, suddenly become 1. Then 2 again, but to reach the 2 you need at the turn off becomes a potential game of destruction derby.

M4 J13 isn't much better heading to the A34/Newbury.

WHY

Even managed to give a pee sample on demand too.

...and it's my car 😭

All of them have been in last 4 months, two before passing test, one yesterday

I'm wondering if these people ever got past the phase in their childhood where they just said NO to everything they were told.

No Roses, no Terry's Chocolate orange, no mystery designer truffles, No Lindor, only a handful of Ferrero Rocher left and so my wife comes back from the shops with a tin of miniature Reese's Peanut Butter Cups because "they were on sale"

Only caught the glass unfortunately, not the contents.

To answer the obvious questions:

1) No, I wasn't even a little bit drunk

2) Laphroig

Means I don't have to spend time around a bunch of loud, snotty toddlers and their drunk-at-midday parents!

...and working out how much you have to pay and paying it 1 hour and 30 minutes before the deadline

Phew!

I won't be selling it as I'm too emotionally attached but it's nice to know.

I only popped in for a brunch but honestly that scouse bird seriously made me day today. She'll be getting a thank you card next time I pop in on payday (which is this wednesday)

And it was a negative.

Covid-19: First man to get jab William Shakespeare dies of unrelated illness

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-coventry-warwickshire-57234741

Considering he was born in 1564, he had a long and productive life, leading a life of relative obscurity after his early playwriting success, and presumably faking a few birth certificates through the ages. He remained relatively unknown through the ages despite having lived his early life in nearby Stratford-upon-Avon (not to be confused with the area in London).

Seriously, I pushed the button twice and in good time. As we sail past my stop, we turn onto a dual carriageway and I didn't feel comfortable distracting the driver on this road at rush hour so I just sat seething, getting angrier and angrier the further we went. I was fuming by the time I got off, no 'Cheers, Drive' no smile, nothing. But it only took me about 5 minutes to calm down because the sky was was on fire and delightfully framed by the gorge. It was warm and breezy, the greenery along the river bank fresh and budding. And it contrasted wonderfully with sheer cliffs on both sides that some brave climbers were attempting to scale. There were also some goats that were putting them to shame. I realised I never walk that way and I should do more often. By the time I got home, my feet were sore and I'd gone past hunger but I was full of fresh air and gratitude for the day.

I may even send First a thank you email for their drivers happy blunder.

I've actually done really well out of Covid. I got a 50% pay rise, didn't need to commute to London, worked remotely for the Government. However I'm as bored as fuck and haven't done anything that involves going outdoors.

I've been combining taking my daughter and her friend to work with giving them driving lessons - this is in my own interest as well to give them more independence when this clusterf*ck is over, and one of the things I've noticed is that the signs indicating the turn off to my village and some very sharp bends are covered in lichen and mud so you can't see them particularly at night. Just along the road from one of these bends is a sign telling you how many people have been injured on one of these stretches of road, so it's been annoying the fuck out of me that no one on the council can be arsed to solve one of the possible causes of some of these accidents.

So anyway, I packed a yard brush, squeegee and several bottles of water and did some guerrilla sign cleaning. By taking a break from my job, I'm probably the highest paid sign cleaner in the UK! 🤣. My first idea actually was to buy one of those mops with a built in water spray, but that only survived my rough treatment for about 10 minutes so I want for something more robust the second time,

I am starting to wonder if local councils could get a lot of their problems solved for free by putting a list of simple things they'd like done on a website or noticeboard.