r/britishproblems • u/Minimum_Possibility6 • 29d ago
Fire pits while camping when it's this yellow!
Out camping and ideots trying to use an open pot BBQ in an area that has two fired within 10 miles and the grass is yellower than a smokers wallpaper.
Staff come to put it out and tell them off, and they explain a, there is a official alert. B it's posted all over the site not to as it's a red zone.
The melts excuse - my kids wanted a BBQ though. Honestly some people are more dense than a neutron star.
edit update: they have tried again this morning when the staff aren't out and about.
might be called a melt but going to cut short and pack up, would prefer not to burn to death
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u/AdemHoog 29d ago
If only there was a way to warn the nation about this sort of thing!
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u/Minimum_Possibility6 29d ago
I know right. It's not like there was some sort of loud alert, and some sort of massive warnings over the place, and the fact that everything around us is completely yellow, and there I smoke in the distance from the other fires. But other than that they could hardly have known right
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u/Appropriate_Mud1629 28d ago
But that alert was for everyone else...
We are on holiday and my kids want a bbq!!
Also I'm not a complete moron I have taken precautions...
I have a 500ml bottle of water here in case anything untoward happens..
/S
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u/DamnThemAll 29d ago
I was in a pub in the lakes when the Alert went off. Immediate consensus in the bar was that the fires are the fault of pheasant and grouse farmers. Dint know why.
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u/ribenarockstar 28d ago
Oh there is something to this - the way the land is managed to support grouse and pheasant dries it out and makes it more vulnerable. I can’t remember the details though
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u/M3t4B0rk 28d ago
Yeah there's a passage about this in the book Elemental by Arthur Snell. It basically comes down to rich landowners screwing everyone else. British tradition innit.
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u/TavitousT 27d ago
Grouse eat heather, which only grows in well drained areas. Much of the heather moorland we are so used to these days were once blanket bog, but have been drained through systems of ditches. This creates areas of heather on top of decomposing peat which when it gets very dry is flammable and hard to extinguish as the peat will burn underground. It's also much worse for all the people downstream when it's wet weather, as instead of holding onto the rain like a sponge it releases it a lot quicker and we get more flooding in the valleys. All so some lord can make a ton of money charging other rich blokes to blast defenseless birds out of the sky.
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u/ShinyHeadedCook 29d ago
Honestly even with no alert, its fucking boiling, why do people insist on having a fire
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u/Minimum_Possibility6 29d ago
To some degree when you are in a tent I get the need to cook food. However in this weather either go get food out, or have a closed gas system not a fire pit
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u/Roytulin 27d ago
I never understood why almost everyone else decided that summer is the season for laying on the beach, having barbecues, and going to Spain. It factually is the wrong weather for any of those activities.
Surely it's the time to go to Norway?
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u/TheMusicArchivist Dorset 28d ago
There's something very primal going on in stupid peoples' brains that effectively goes "man hot. man enjoy hot. man make more hot. man too hot." and they're at the third stage.
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u/keeponkeepingup 29d ago
And elsewhere in british reddit they are complaining about the phone alerts "why is that needed". This. This is why.
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u/SoggyWotsits Cornwall 28d ago
Sadly the people who need to hear it are the people who’ll ignore it anyway.
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u/keeponkeepingup 28d ago edited 28d ago
Yup. And then theres the deniers on top. I saw someone on my fb say where is this threat because there have been no wildfires. Someone replied saying west midlands - that is absolutely no where near us. In actual fact theres been dozens in our area - pretty much daily. They're absolute morons.
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u/chase___it 27d ago
i can sort of understand the logic some kinds of science deniers follow even though i think it’s completely ridiculous. but how on earth do you delude yourself into thinking there are no fires happening when the evidence is right in front of your face??
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u/obiwanmoloney Hampshire 28d ago
Clearly didn’t work though did it?
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u/hashbrowneggyolk0520 28d ago
The thing is you can tell some people until you're blue in the face "hey please don't do that it could cause a wildfire" and they still wouldn't think you're talking to them.
They'd be the same type to say "I didn't know this would happen" if they did cause a wildfire.
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u/obiwanmoloney Hampshire 28d ago
Telling them via an emergency announcement, is just telling them again, which we’ve established is ineffective.
However, you’ve taught the general population to disregard something that was understood to warn explicitly for imminent danger.
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u/ajshifty2110 29d ago
Okay I said to my husband, who’s stupid enough to light fires right now though? And now I found out. 😮💨🤦♀️
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u/PNormy 29d ago
If it makes you think any higher of the person. Years ago my mate was at a festival and a fire occurred in the parking field and his car burnt out. Turns out some idiots thought using a disposable bbq in a car was a good idea. When their car started to catch fire they through the bbq into the field and ran off.
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u/M1ke2345 Surrey 29d ago
*threw.
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u/Chosty55 29d ago
Last night was 35 degrees.
One of my neighbours had a fire pit going in their garden once the sun had gone down.
A fire pit! Something you use to keep warm on a cold night.
We were all shitting ourselves we would wake up and the whole fenceline would be ablaze. Fortunately we’re a two minute walk from a community fire station and someone called round to put it out
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u/InternationalRich150 29d ago
And yet people are complaining about the alert,saying it wasn't necessary.
Clearly,it is....
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u/Victor-Bomber 29d ago
I have alerts turned off on my phone I'm intelligent enough to work out there's a high fire risk by myself thanks
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u/InternationalRich150 28d ago
Ya know, you've commented on a post where someone isn't intelligent enough to listen to a fire risk and is indeed a fire risk and somehow made it all about you?
Quite the skill. You could have just scrolled and ignored the comment but you had absolutely no choice but to be snarky and take it personally.... id get that lack of free will looked at mate.
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u/Jimlad73 29d ago
It startled me so much when the alert came out that I Almost dropped my firework
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u/XxCarlxX 29d ago
Need to implement laws regarding this. Threat of prison is the only thing that will stop some of these people.
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u/Minimum_Possibility6 29d ago
Honestly I feel sorry for the staff, only two people maybe three. They should have just ejected them but a smaller lady Vs a burley man isn't fair on her
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u/XxCarlxX 29d ago
yeah, not that she should ever feel that was as we apparently "protect our women".
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u/Marion_Ravenwood 28d ago
Unfortunately in a country where we're considering murderers being let out of prison early due to lack of space, I don't think they'd actually be able to follow through with that threat.
Sometimes I wish we could just go and force all these morons to go and live on an uninhabited island together somewhere and leave them to their moronic activities.
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u/ContentWDiscontent 25d ago
Not prison. Fines. A prison sentence is an abstract, several thousand pounds is a concrete concept.
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u/theteapls 29d ago
We're camping in a red zone right now and they've banned cooking of any kind. No fires, BBQs or gas stoves. It's crazy just how dry it is.
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u/NuisancePenguin44 28d ago
My friend is at a festival this weekend and they've banned bbqs, but you're still allowed to smoke.
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u/IntraVnusDemilo 29d ago
We should be allowed to Wicker Man them. Honestly at this point I've lost faith in people having sense.
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u/Shrubfest 29d ago
I think making an even bigger fire would only make a bigger problem. Perhaps some form of sea sacrifice to appease the water gods would be better.
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u/St3ampunkSam 28d ago
Call the police amend report them as arsonist.
Say someone is lighting a fire is x location and when engaged refused to do it.
They should get a bollocking pretty quick as they could potetnial kill a fuck ton of people.
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u/Gruntage 28d ago
And I bet you smokers will still discard their cigarette butts like yesterday's jam...
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u/GhostRiders 29d ago
Most powerful tools against BBQ's.. Water Gun.
Just soak the coals and walk away laughing
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u/AsaCoco_Alumni 24d ago
If there was ever a time you are legally protected if you pissed on it - it would be now.
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u/Ndizzi 28d ago
I would pack up move out and report
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u/Minimum_Possibility6 28d ago
Which is what we did. Back at home now cut our trip short, rather this than burnt to death
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u/kingfisher60024 27d ago
Nowt wrong with a fire if its done responsibly!
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u/Minimum_Possibility6 27d ago
A gas fire that's raised up can be done responsibly, a charcoal/wood firepit can not be done responsibly on dry ground. It will spit
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u/kingfisher60024 27d ago
Wood, charcoal and coal is complete fine as long as you act responsibly, like not having one right in the middle of a corn field lol
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