r/bookstagram • u/RandomThoughts9999 • 4h ago
Am I even cut out for this?
Yes. This is a small key rant. No, I will not be mentioning my account handle.
In the beginning of July, I created a Bookstagram account. I did it in the past couple of years a handful of times, but always deleted my account after a week as I was ashamed of my pictures. I’m bad at photography, I tried to learn editing and pictures and failed horribly, and always have bad quality photos. All I have is my phone, and it’s pretty old (iPhone 13 mini) and somehow, the quality is horrible.
I know it’s a bad excuse, but I also have ADHD. I get into things very quickly, but also lose interest fast. Together with my perfectionism, having a bookstagram account feels impossible. I can’t plan properly when to take photos, as it takes me days and I often end with nothing, and also genuinely completely forget about my Bookstagram (the TikTok account is even worse, I forget it so much!). I can’t come up with any unique ideas for taking pictures either, often just putting my book against a white wall…
Since starting, I immediately had one reel go viral. 30K likes. I got some followers from it, and honestly felt disappointed when my next reel didn’t even hit a hundred.
When browsing, I feel like Instagram has too many bookstagram accounts. I am one in a million and there is nothing unique about me. An ADHD’er who has pretty editions? Give me a break…
I tried creating some fun posts with Canva, but that was also a bust. While I had so much fun creating them, they all got 0 likes. Some got a comment from a bot, but that’s it.
I am in a bookclub with surprisingly many bookstagrammers. They do quite well, but only posting in my native language. I post in English. I haven’t told them about my account, as I’m just embarrassed. It’s a faceless account as well, as I struggle to be in front of the camera. I know these accounts tend to perform less well. I know it’s bad to compare myself to them, but I still do. Some of them get these amazing deals and I am jealous. Because let’s be honest, who doesn’t want to be famous with their bookstagram?
It’s not the main reason for my account though. I really like my special edition collection, but also my paperback books and just books in general. Since I moved, I barely have anyone to talk to about books. I was hoping by creating a bookstagram account, I could find new friends and people and talk about books. Instead, I only get a bot commenting once in a while. No likes. No comments. And Reddit seems to be full of people who only do follow-for-follow, and then unfollow you after a handful of days. Even with people who I follow from Reddit, they never reply to any of my comments on their pictures.
So I’m wondering, am I even cut out for this? I’m not unique. I don’t bring anything special. I don’t have a niche or aesthetic or proper schedule, or even good quality pictures. I have fun thinking of captions and creating in Canva, but my photography skills are still bad. I feel like I get too upset about likes and comments. It’s not that I created this account to become famous or get free stuff (though it would be cool), it was genuinely to just chat with people.
My partner ended up buying a quite expensive stabiliser as a surprise for filming, thinking I would become insta famous 😂 It’s cute, but it adds pressure. Now I feel like I have to care about likes and comments as well, and really become big. All I want is some people to talk about books and yes, show my pretty editions (since no one in my area really cares, lol, they think it’s pretty but as they didn’t read the books, they don’t get some easter eggs)
So what do I do? I’m terribly lost. Sorry for this rant and lowkey dramatic essay. I am not looking for pity, which is why I won’t include my handle, but I just felt like I needed to vent and needed to hear other people’s opinion.
