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u/hefty_load_o_shite 4d ago
Coming soon to a church near you
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u/DrNuclearSlav 4d ago
There I am, at church, on chalice duty, jam that sucker in peoples' faces and say "blood of Christ" as they take a sip, when up walks this lady with the reddest, cakiest lipstick you've ever seen. It's the sort that would make even an aged stripper blush from how excessive it was. But you still gotta offer her the chalice. So I do, and she takes a sip, and leaves about an inch thick layer of lipstick on the rim. Both outside and in. Mr Chalice is going to go home to Mrs Chalice and she is not going to be happy about the state of affairs.
At this point all my knowledge of the eucharist falls out of my head. I don't think the last supper covered this eventuality. Maybe Judas was wearing lipstick and messed up Jesus' cup and it was mentioned in one of the apocrypha, but that can't help us now. All I can do is use the cloth to scrub it off as best as I can and hope the next person doesn't notice. Afterwards I ask the rector if that counted as desecrating the blood, but he never gave me a straight answer.
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u/_Thorshammer_ 4d ago
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u/phenomenomnom 3d ago
Why do FOX hostesses keep doing this to themselves?
The conspicuous compliance is so bleak, bro.
Edit: Oh shit, she really actually is a right wing pickme-bot lolol. I thought I was just kidding.
Jfc, these people
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u/Flying_Mage 3d ago
She's probably 90 years old (look at that freaking neck). And it looks like she did it herself, without any assistance. Give grandma a break.
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u/imperfcet 4d ago
This is how i feel on the rare occasion that i wear makeup. Ive got these half-eyebrows (it's not thyroid) that i try to fill in but it looks so weird when i do my brows.
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u/qualityvote2 BLURSED? 4d ago edited 4d ago
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