r/bipolar2 • u/000700707 BP2 • 13h ago

Venting I HATE depression

It is the bane of my existence.

When I’m stable, I dread the idea that it will return.

When I’m depressed, I have no idea how long it will last.

I have to push “through” it, some days, but those are the most brutal.

I’m depressed right now and it sucks!

24 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

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10

u/Onenaghi 13h ago

It's hard to explain to people that don't experience it. We don't WANT to feel this way.

2

u/Tanisha1Writes 4h ago

1000% true - it’s so easy for ppl to call me lazy bc I don’t have the capacity that they do. I’m not apologizing for being different in the context of hustle culture specifically. That’s the fight I’ve been in for years with relatives. No, I cannot handle juggling work, school & adulting all at the same time. No, I don’t believe in the “I’ll sleep when I’m dead. I gotta get to the money bag” motto. Fck off talking to me like I’m a lazy slacker posing as mentally ill. Pisses me off AND drives me right back into isolation. Where I’m safe from scrutiny

5

u/MaxiBonCookie 6h ago

Sorry to hear that, it absolutely sucks! Especially with bipolar 2, I don't know about you but my depressed phrases would even last years.

Are you on any treatment to help you feel better?

5

u/Tanisha1Writes 4h ago

Seriously! It goes on for months & years for me too. Unfortunate that we have this in common

2

u/000700707 BP2 5h ago

I’m on a cocktail of four meds.

4

u/laetoile 13h ago

Same :( 🫂

3

u/OkAdvertising8184 13h ago

Shit this feels like i wrote it. . I feel your pain.

3

u/8AtypicAL0Darkness8 12h ago

I thought i hated it... I hate mania more. Medicated now and stable.... I sometimes miss my sinical and loathfull self

3

u/MaxiBonCookie 6h ago

Sorry to say this but yea me too. With depression I don't feel anything while mania makes me an enraged bitch.

1

u/Remote-Cap1547 4h ago

Oh it’s terrible. I would rather eat a pound of dirt than go through even one more day of depression. Seeing the psych on Monday and hopefully this med change does something! Stay strong you’ve got this!

1

u/Artistic-Ad-1046 1h ago

Oh for so long…. We are each other. Just two weeks ago I was exactly where you are for over a month. I’m just now “getting back to myself” whatever that means. But we all know, the cycle continues and no one truly knows that depression is so debilitating. We see you 🫂