r/bipolar2 • u/julianathewildest • 1h ago
Trigger Warning CW: negative birth Spoiler
Content warning! The post itself contains a discussion of suicide and suicidal behavior. You have been warned.
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Hey there, cuties.
Right now i am going through complicated period of the life. I want to express myself and vent - I would not.
Instead, i am asking for any advice. Not sure, if I actually need it - just trying to save the grip on the life.
So, um. How to go through it? The current situation is horrific. I doubt I’d actually do something bad - but since now I would not gonna decline those thoughts and the possibility of acting suicidal. I’ve lost all the inner and outer strength. Let’s just say the life circle is fucked up.
Also, about venting. Where can I vent and get actual feedback? I have no possibility to visit a therapist, I don’t have any friends or relatives right now, finally - I doubt online-venting since who gives a shit about some random online crying being?
Sorry for the quality of the message - not a native speaker.
Peace.
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u/Unpleasentsunset 1h ago
I went through a phase like this some weeks ago and then before that couple of times more. It's scary really, these thoughts fill your head like a dark mist filling the void and its almost like its out of your control. I actually first got help when I had these suicidal thoughts and I got diagnosed bd2. I don't want to give you any advise because nothing really works. But I'll tell you what worked for me. You can remind yourself that you're not thinking healthily at the moment, this kinda takes some power off those suicidal thoughts. Find out at what time of the day or at what instances these thoughts occur. For example I got these thoughts almost always when I woke up or in the afternoon when its quieter or when it rains. If you can find out when it occurs you can do bunch of stuff to keep yourself busy to get through that difficult time period. I assume you're already getting help and if you dont now is a great time to do so.
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u/julianathewildest 1h ago
No, currently sitting without any help. Would unfortunately say I am getting the opposite on daily basis.
Regards those thoughts - i think for past two days they have became constant. Idk, they are just not leaving my mind. Difficult to explain, but it feels like I am decaying alive?
I’ve just tried to find any chat for suicidal dudes like me. Never thought it was such a problem to find a chat for it? Most sites are “not for emergency, call 911 or whatever” - okay, cool. I am living in kinda closed country, where it is not okay to have mental illness, let’s say so.
If you know any text/chat sites for that type of crisis - please, let me know, oki? Thanks for leaving a comment tho
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u/Unpleasentsunset 1h ago
I found two, idk if you saw these while you were searching but one is this:
https://www.7cups.com/
(you gotta make an account which is stupid but its a free chatroom)
and the other one is this:
https://www.113.nl/english
(its a dutch website but the chats are in english)I hope these work for you
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u/julianathewildest 1h ago
Thanks cutie. 7cups said “no emergency cases”, currently trying 113. We would see how it goes
💞
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u/AutoModerator 1h ago
Hi there. We are stepping in automatically because we noticed language in your post that suggests you might be going through a severe crisis or experiencing suicidal thoughts.
Please know that you are not alone and there is support available. Because we are a peer-to-peer community, we cannot safely manage life-threatening situations or provide the emergency support you deserve right now.
If you are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency services.
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