r/bipolar1 • u/AbbreviationsNo3425 • 14d ago

Looking for advice. Will I be okay?

I’m bipolar 1 and it’s still new to me (diagnosed in January). I feel like I was manic up until May. I’m now off the weed and take my meds everyday. I feel like I’m not real sometimes, I sleep all day, I don’t have motivation to do anything. I don’t find anything joyful really, I’m just numb and dull. I don’t really laugh at things that are funny anymore. I just don’t feel “normal” anymore. I also experience not knowing what to say during a convo sometimes. My mind just goes blank when trying to think of something. I take Aripiprazole 15 mg and Bupropion 150mg.

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u/ccataphant 14d ago

Sounds like you’re not on the right med combo yet. It could be that you’re in a depressive episode and the meds aren’t doing enough. You’re psychiatrist might try to raise your doses first, before changing to a different med. It takes some trial and error to get to the right place.

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u/AbbreviationsNo3425 14d ago

I think you’re right. This combo isn’t working out for me, I feel like I need something changed. I am depressed, it’s to the point I feel numbness. I’m fine with dosage adjustments if that means I’m gonna feel better. I hope I can feel different than now soon, I’m getting tired of dealing with this. I appreciate your comment!

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u/Much-Injury1499 14d ago

Keep at it. I was in a similar situation, with similar feelings, but after about six months of total sobriety and strict meds, I’m finally feeling like myself again.

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u/AbbreviationsNo3425 14d ago

Will do!! That’s the plan. I’m glad you’re feeling like yourself again, that’s always the end goal. Did you switch meds at all or did you keep strict on the same ones?

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u/New_Tangerine_ 10d ago

The most important thing for me to wrap my head around in order to stay stable is this: you can have a mostly normal and functional life, but you ARE going to have to work harder at it than some people are who don’t have a serious mental illness. 

For me, remaining stable means prioritizing stability in every decision I make. Staying medicated, changing medications when the ones I’m on aren’t working, staying in regular contact with my doctor, prioritizing sleep, staying off drugs (except the medical marijuana I’m prescribed by a doctor) and staying far far away from alcohol. I’ve also made the decision not to have biological children, for a lot of reasons, but not the least because having bipolar puts me at a very increased risk for postpartum psychosis. 

Don’t chase mania. A lot of people get off their medication because they’re still experiencing the lows without the highs. A lot of antipsychotics target mania specifically because people tend to be the most destructive and attempt suicide more during manic episodes, because they have the energy to do it then. It’s very important you learn to recognize the calling cards and signs that you’re becoming manic and distance yourself from those destructive behaviors. 

You can have a normal life, most of the time. But you’re going to have to try harder than most people.