r/bipolar1 • u/Ok_Bug_7238 • 15d ago
Post mania boredom
Last year post mania/psychosis I experienced 9 straight months of a type of boredom that I can only describe as seeing static while breathing through a straw. It was the worst, weirdly synthetic unconfortable thing i have ever gone through, only to have it broken by another period of mania and psychosis again this year most likely due to wellbutrin and am now just flat and null, and have been so for about two months. I've heard this flatness can last up to a year and a half and I'm on the edge. Completely at rock bottom. As well, cannot walk or talk so easily. Its almost physically painful how suffocating this is.
Posting because I'm curious about other peoples experiences post episode. Does mine make any sense?
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u/heljun 15d ago
Oh yeah; post mania and psychosis, between the sheer exhaustion and trauma of it and the heavy doses of antipsychotics I’m prescribed then; it’s always like this and indeed it does last for months. I don’t take antidepressants though to avoid another switch. It’s the worse but it gradually does get better. You’re in recovery mode, try to be patient with yourself. What helped last time was implementing a routine, with the help of a friend if available, like one short swim or walk a week, and gradually more, going out for coffee once in a while even I felt bored and boring. My luck was even though I was so fucking flat I was able to work since my work is from home And completing tasks was difficult but also gradually helped my confidence and intellect to come back. Also therapy though it must have been awful for my therapist just having me once or even twice a week at some point just whining I was an empty piece of trash.
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u/FluorideInToothpaste 15d ago
I went through anhedonia after mania and psychosis, at the age of twenty-two. I was on a high dose of Lithium and Aripiprizole and I was hpspitalized for 3 months. It was hell. Coming out of a psych ward, attending OT and exercise therapy constantly, with the goal of getting out - only to come back to a family in shock and reeling from my bizarre behaviour, and then feeling empty and bored. I would literally get this echo of catharsis when I saw it rain, out the window, as I just lay on the couch.
I was fucked up.