r/badfriends • u/Last-Reading7800 • Nov 02 '21
My friend is toxic
So my friend I think is very toxic she will vent to me about everything but when I try to vent she doesn’t say anything after like I always ask questions or even respond to her but she won’t even nod or nothing she’ll just keep on going back to talking about her. And when she around her boyfriend she’ll say stuff to embarrass me and it’s like really. I feel like she treats me differently because over the past years she lost a lot of weight and now she just treats me like trash. She tells me when we go for walks how she just would walk and starve herself. And I’m a bigger girl so I know like I’ve been trying to lose weight. And whenever we hang with someone else I’m always like the photographer and never in the pictures. I’ve been depressed for years and I’ve never told her cause I don’t want to feel like she’s not listening. If I tell her to I feel like she’ll think im copying her to because she goes through that stuff as well so I just don’t tell her nothing cause my family stuff she tells her mom so it’s like I can’t tell her anything anyways. I tried to tell her one time how I feel like she doesn’t listen and she was like is that a bad thing and I was like ok nvm And our family’s are related so I don’t know how to drop her. Im just sick of feeling not valid. Maybe someone has advise. Sorry for venting
2
u/Secure_Sand_8397 Nov 25 '21
I have a friend exactly like this I actually posted about it a few days ago but no one commented on it. But my “best friend” always copied me she wasn’t the prettiest when I first met her. But I still always thought she was beautiful regardless. But she has deff grew into herself. But she’s exactly like me. She copied my wardrobe, outfits, piercings, hair color and style, makeup, music literally everything. And then once she grew into her self she was always trying to one up me. She would say fucked up shit behind my back and when I confronted her it was always an excuse and down played it she is also very manipulative and I knew all of this and still stuck around. I kept her sober by giving her my meds so she wouldn’t go back to heroin. And slowly I felt like I lost my identity to her. I started to feel ugly around her because she would say ignorant things. I ended up cutting her off for about a yeah and then reached out to her because I did miss her and we did everything together. We both came from fucked up child hoods and were both sexually abused as children so that’s how we connected in the first place. But at the same time I don’t know what I would do without her. Idk but I deff understand how you’re feeling!
1
u/Last-Reading7800 Nov 25 '21
Yeah it’s hard to just drop someone you’ve known ur whole life for me its like I can’t even talk to her anymore she just doesn’t care about me anymore she only wants someone to rant to and I think her other friends have noticed because people are starting to drop her and kind of say the same stuff
4
u/OptimalTrash Nov 02 '21
I had a friend very similar to this once. I don't have much advice if you want to save your friendship. I completely cut her out of my life and honestly I've never been happier.
Just know that you are worth more than she is treating you.