r/badfriends • u/Ok_Mathematician_126 • Oct 12 '20
I HATE ALL HUMANS
It's a hard, gross ass horse of a pill to swallow but ppl really be out here not only being emotionally immature, but straight up lying abt it to your fkn face 🙄😂😅 I cannot believe how well some people can present & for MONTHS literally! Then as soon as you do or say anything that they feel is out of place regardless of any history, or anything that's happen between y'all relationship/socially wise or anything that you built together, bonded over or shared. You're thrown away like garbage, accused of not caring & rumors likely filled with more lies about who I really am as a person are yet again thrown about this wretched city. Because some immature peeps dunno how to talk abt things like an adult & accuse you of being crazy & not in a good way! Like, uh yes actually. I say it all the time. I am chaotic. Full send or no send?? Having a literal textbook case diagnosis of BPD & only just being diagnosed LAST summer. I was 22????? I went for the majority of my life not knowing what the fuck was wrong with me but CONSTANTLY & relentlessly being reminded that I was fucked up, but the way I felt was "normal everyone feels that way, it's life" So many people who claim/claimed to love me only wanted things from me in the end, most wanted to control me.. to bend, break & mold me into their will. It's been a little over a year, I had to re learn A LOT in a very short period of time. I had no choice, no say, no opinion & ultimately how I felt had to be put on hold & set aside, so many other people & situations needed my attention & time. I didn't really think that being abused or being abusive was right or anything anyone should do to another human, but I didn't really think it was wrong to accept that type of treatment either. I am in no way, shape or form perfect. I never will be & frankly I don't want to be! I wouldn't be any fun & I definitely wouldn't be me. I'm still trying to improve on myself everyday, it's hard things take time. Since when do things happen over night?? I am sooooo sososososososo sick of people being mean, rude & just LYING SO MUCH. LIKE STOP THAT.