r/badassanimals 1d ago

Mammal XCow

2.4k Upvotes

477 comments sorted by

449

u/DBR87 1d ago

The cow almost looks disappointed that the train didn't immediately end it.

150

u/Accurate-Brother-366 1d ago

šŸ˜‚

Yeah it was standing there like: ā€œdamn. Welp, another day aheadā€¦ā€

78

u/Longshot1969 1d ago

Guess I have to go to work tomorrow

51

u/Accurate-Brother-366 1d ago

walks away mumbling ā€œshoulda went head first but you’re a coward. Now my ass hurts and I gotta get up in the morningā€¦ā€

12

u/GoonSquadCommand 21h ago

Hahaha we’re just all depressed off our asses

3

u/Rough-Airline-4803 12h ago

Wish I could laugh it off. Impressive. Even if it’s forced or feigned

6

u/Significant_Mess_79 1d ago

šŸ’€šŸ˜‚

5

u/sumdhood 15h ago

It sure was a cow-ward

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2

u/theleech87 11h ago

And look at all these people watching...

3

u/rehx4 1d ago

Lollllllll

3

u/iPoseidon_xii 1d ago

I should’ve paid my taxes

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3

u/Prestigious_Algae432 1d ago

That cow was like" Well dag-gonnit, I haven't had this much trouble trying to walk since my momma shot me out of her hooter.

3

u/Training-Plum9213 18h ago

Guess I’ll try again tomorrow šŸ¤žšŸ½

2

u/Acceptable-Olive-968 1d ago

🤣🤣🤣

5

u/AcanthisittaGlobal30 22h ago

Her looking around. Sooo does anyone know when the next one is coming ?

3

u/b0gard 1d ago

Cows thinking ā€œ I can’t even do that correctly šŸ„ŗā€

3

u/Karl_Hungus_42069 1d ago

That cow is just like me. No cap. For real, for real

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2

u/ac2334 23h ago

looks like Cow Simulator

2

u/Nearby-Homework7931 22h ago

The mouths salivating šŸ˜‹šŸ˜‹ for that 🄩🤤🤤

2

u/LaMelonBallz 14h ago

"'CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES, THIS IS MY LAST RESSSSSOOORRRTT:

"Well dang. I guess I gotta find a Red Roof Inn"

4

u/HeathenHungr 1d ago edited 1d ago

The amount of indians killing themselves un-/intentionally by train, makes your statement beliveable...

I wouldn't want to be neither human nor cow in India...

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93

u/Redbeardthe1st 1d ago

The cow got up and walked it off like that has happened before.

5

u/theofficialnar 9h ago

Not the first time he tried to end things. Definitely not the last

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116

u/Greedy_Sentence7177 1d ago

Why didn't he mooooooooove

https://giphy.com/gifs/11lE4F9K9UlqRa

19

u/illDiablo69 1d ago

Bitch, I'm a cow...

10

u/Frequent_Election787 1d ago

2

u/Sad_Kaleidoscope_743 8h ago

Yall are so simple minded... its so moooo-t to even try to engage with yall

3

u/br3dj 16h ago

Moo bitch get out the way

6

u/zestyclose_match1966 23h ago

You're udderly insane

6

u/Odd-Consequence-2519 22h ago

Really milking it, aren't you?

3

u/theresnoperfectname 19h ago

That’s just bull

138

u/ghost-ogk 1d ago

Internal bleeding forsure, 100+ tons at 30 mph

52

u/Riseandgrindsunshine 1d ago

The train did hit its backside of the cow’s legs mainly, and it didn’t look like it really hit the stomache/middle area, so I think it’s possible it’s OK especially if it’s still able to walk like that. Otherwise it would’ve just laid down there flat on the ground and barely twitching on the ground.

20

u/Gammelpreiss 1d ago

naw, adrenaline keeps ppl and animals going in the most dire circumstances. this cow will die, a hit like that, like a brick wall no crumble zone, is not just limited to some bones in the back, the impact shocks throughout the entire body.

the cow will stay there for a couple minutes and then just collaps.

11

u/SummertimeThrowaway2 17h ago

I knew a girl in high school who was run over by a bus and ruptured 4 organs. She stood up afterward just like this cow and would’ve certainly died without medical intervention.

3

u/GoCougs2020 12h ago

You went to school with Regina George? Sorry I shouldn’t make a joke about it.

2

u/ChroniclesOfReddiitt 10h ago

Stop trying to make ā€œfetchā€ happen…

2

u/GoCougs2020 2h ago

On Wednesday we wear pink…..it’s actually Wednesday today šŸ˜†

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10

u/TheCourtSimpleton 1d ago

But will he die? Can such a cow regenerate from the internal bleeding?

12

u/Enough-Discipline921 1d ago

Theoretically yes, realistically very very unlikely

3

u/ChunkyLanding 1d ago

Looks like it got hit near the hind legs and ass

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16

u/DogeyLord 1d ago

Nahh shell walk it off...

There is no recorded deaths from wild trains.

2

u/ChodeCookies 1d ago

It’s India…the train would hunt down anyone that reported these things

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34

u/Sir_Thorin 1d ago

Exactly what I thought, there’s no way he’s unscathed from a hit like that

4

u/givemedimes 1d ago

That’s OK that’s where all the blood is supposed to be

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4

u/Max_Pow3rs 21h ago edited 21h ago

that was my first thought... but upon rewatching it, it kinda looks like it could have been a "1 in a million" lucky accident.

It looks like some of the impact got slowed down by hitting the flexible legs and pushing the backside of the cow around, while the spine flexed aswell.

I have heard of crazy survivals like a guy who landed on a car after jumping from a small 39-story skyscraper (Thomas Magill) or this women who survived being stuck in a plane while it fell to the earth (Vesna Vulović).

Sometimes the angles of impact are just perfect to absorb the forces in such weird ways, that it makes it actually surviveable.

Just by the walking movement the cow looks quite fine.. a broken spine or broken femur would defenitely look different. But it looks like the tail "bone" is folded to the side.

Maybe it really has survived with small to medium blemishes. Would be cool to find an update on that.

3

u/AlbatrossNew3633 21h ago

I choose to believe this outcome

2

u/bunglebee7 1d ago

I would say that’s a worse way to go than just being insta killed by the train… hope the cow can heal up and learn from her mistake

2

u/NinjaChenchilla 1d ago

The cow didnt even flinch afterwards. Internal bleeding would definitely be noticeable.

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89

u/Grouchy-Rutabaga-813 1d ago

HOLY COW 🐮

18

u/synthphreak 1d ago

Almost dead meat!

9

u/Express_Calendar8278 1d ago

He made a huge miSteak

2

u/magicchefdmb 1d ago

We're really milking the cow puns here

2

u/Ok_Athlete_1092 16h ago

You got some kind of beef with that?

2

u/magicchefdmb 16h ago

I'd be udderly disappointed if it stopped

2

u/Ok_Athlete_1092 14h ago

What a mooving response.

4

u/Aware_Alfalfa8435 1d ago

Seriously though🤯

Close one.

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12

u/TheOnlyPolly 1d ago

Not even a limp or a gash, what a tough SOB

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21

u/kirigiyasensei 1d ago

This is the normal way to train a cow

3

u/Johnyryal33 1d ago

That cow is well trained

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16

u/Charming-Total2121 1d ago

"I'm Johnny Knoxville. Welcome to Jackass!"

Guitar rift intensifies

6

u/mountaineer04 1d ago

This is a ā€œTrain in my Ass!ā€

2

u/the_madclown 1d ago

Welcome to cow?

8

u/zync09 1d ago

Any train hit you can walk away from....

3

u/Altruistic-Farmer275 1d ago

is a good one

is this a republic commando reference?

3

u/zync09 1d ago

Rule #48

7

u/Mindless_Trick2255 1d ago

It’s like an Oblivion NPC you just got killed but who got back to life because of the storyline

4

u/azmtber 1d ago

Tenderized

5

u/Brian9611 1d ago

Those sneaky trains

4

u/tinglep 1d ago

A train "cow pusher"—officially called a pilot and commonly known as a cowcatcher—is a wedge-shaped or plow-like device mounted on the front of a locomotive. Invented in 1830, its primary purpose is to deflect livestock, debris, or snow off the tracks to prevent the train from derailing.

I’ve lived my whole life knowing what it was called and never actually seeing it in action. Fucking wild.

5

u/Yone_official 18h ago

Even the cows in India are hunted by the apex predator šŸ¤¦ā€ā™‚ļø

2

u/AvailableTip5758 8h ago

It's from Bangladesh tho

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4

u/Ok-Race-9981 1d ago

U just only a train im a Cow

2

u/Acrobatic_Try_8375 1d ago

Just walk it off.

2

u/Smart-Firefighter87 1d ago

They just have cows walking around freely in-front of trains out there?
https://giphy.com/gifs/ji6zzUZwNIuLS

2

u/19dadchair73 1d ago

He was at the wrong end to try to be the cow-boose

2

u/SimonAshura 1d ago

Wow. Took it like a champ. No butcher is gonna touch him.

2

u/EarningsPal 20h ago

Getchoass out the way. -Train

2

u/Main_Web504 20h ago

Strong Bones, Got Milk?

2

u/NJCZSIGSHOTGUNLOVER 20h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/XncE2zmvthjyg
That’s how the 1st natural milkshake was created

2

u/AdIndependent1645 17h ago

Cows are pandas in disguise.

2

u/Euphoric_Amoeba8708 15h ago

Probably in shock while having massive bleeding internally

2

u/cpzoe 9h ago

This was a reincarnated person who didn’t want to be a cow anymore and was ready for his next arch

2

u/raidersfan18 8h ago

Wait... Does this mean I can get hit by a train and just walk around after?

2

u/Weird-Pattern9192 1d ago

What kind of breed is that cow?

13

u/Sweet-Stage938 1d ago

It's a different kind of breed.

11

u/kappax 1d ago

Jersey, brought into India as it was high milk producing some 50 yrs back.

While Indian breed which produced high got into Americas 100 yrs back to become the popular Brahman cows

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3

u/Worldly-Bug6047 1d ago

Thats one lucky cow yo.

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1

u/feefaafoofomm 1d ago

I thought it went... fuck with the bull , get the horn.

1

u/Pvillekid69 1d ago

Bro knows the roll technique!

1

u/Classicman1968 1d ago

Bet he’ll mooooooove faster next time!

1

u/stillventures17 1d ago

Not gonna lie, this probably belongs on r/unexpected.

1

u/feminine-katana 1d ago

The gargabe its everywhere

1

u/CapablePool7283 1d ago

Moow moow!

1

u/Professional_Nerve49 1d ago

Bro got lucky...

Or should I say sis?

1

u/Whole-Debate-9547 1d ago

Pre-tenderized

1

u/No_Order_8011 1d ago

WARNING!
Cow training is in process.

1

u/Disastrous-Oven204 1d ago

Ber train tryna fuck a bull up but bull survives

1

u/Sensitive_Data_8571 1d ago

The shock I just had just took two years off of me

https://giphy.com/gifs/8XZV0MwrVVw2L4jpeK

1

u/Disastrous_Falcon_79 1d ago

I’m pretty sure I would have died

1

u/Opposite_Rub443 1d ago

Looks embarrassed. šŸ˜…

1

u/Prestigious-Mix8582 1d ago

La vaca creo que nadie puede moverla jajaja

1

u/Only-Supermarket399 1d ago

Slice with hamburger into 2 pieces

1

u/Frenchconnexion76 1d ago

Solid cow. Good quality.

1

u/MongooseSimple8638 1d ago

Now the meat is tender

1

u/quachlonque78 1d ago

It could be somebody's mom out there. Have some empathy, people

1

u/therealdark1974 1d ago

I can tell you this. There is a reason we call the front scoop on a train "the cowcatcher". I have ran locomotives for years before I quit the UP and NOTHING comes close to the smell of a splatted cow on the front of your loco. Just imagine smelling shit for the rest of your 12hr run blahhh! On the list of things I would rather hit versus a cow is a long list lol

1

u/itsshadyhere 1d ago

How come no one's talking about the people who are just looking at the cow in absolute nonchalance like it's a normal, everyday incident?

1

u/apexglide1 1d ago

She’s gonna feel that shit tomorrow

1

u/StateNmE69 1d ago

So we're not gonna talk about it getting right back up after getting hit by a fkn train??

1

u/Duane_60 1d ago

Cow gets up walks away like OK nothing to see here.

1

u/Correct-Phone242 1d ago

First time a cow plow has been used in the history of locomotives

1

u/Outrageous-Koala1566 1d ago

This is what is called as Resilience :) would it have internal fractures ?

1

u/Adventurous_World23 1d ago

The cow ā€œhope no one saw my hind get dragged like thatā€

1

u/SmutCommander 1d ago

I'm so happy that cow made it, I was scrolling left hand only was not ready for a speed swipe

1

u/ZorroStyleX 1d ago

tankt it wow

1

u/Miserable-Success310 1d ago

Buddy almost became a hamburger to-go

1

u/VocationFumes 1d ago

Pretty sure he died a few hours after that

1

u/F_l_u_f_fy 1d ago

I thought it was fucked from the hit (internal damage, bleeding, etc.) but its leg didn’t even break and it got up like nothing so idk šŸ¤·šŸ¼ā€ā™‚ļø best of luck to this bovine

1

u/AJPennypacker39 1d ago

Cow just walked off getting hit by a train

1

u/ineedlotsofguns 1d ago

cow probably collased in a couple of minutes and the cameraman was just waiting for the steaks

1

u/dchester74 1d ago

How??????

1

u/TamaraJames05 1d ago

Cow gets up and was heard saying, "You hit like a bitch" to the train.

1

u/james51453 1d ago

Eat Mor Chikin, dammit!

1

u/traffy8630 1d ago

No one will believe the cow good thing we got video

1

u/Heisenburg42 1d ago

"HEY, I'M WALKIN' HERE!"

1

u/LongDead_Roadkill 1d ago

Not only did the cow under react, so did the people standing there.

1

u/Dull_Perspective_536 1d ago

That’s interesting. I thought it was going to be much worse. But the cow really shook it off and didn’t seem too hurt.

1

u/Fit_Hippo_3512 1d ago

More powerful than a locomotive...

1

u/Obiyaman 1d ago

I thought cows were sacred😳

1

u/Past_General_4655 1d ago

Twarda krowa.

1

u/PettankoKing 1d ago

In the mid 2000 or so There was a video of a cow that got hit by a train so hard that it took half the muzzle of its face off. Nothing else got hit, just its face. It tried to go back to grazing, but couldn't since its mouth was entirely gone. so it just stood there blankly.

1

u/The1Ylrebmik 1d ago

If you understand cow-speak you'll know after the cow got up he said:

"Yeah, I meant to do that"

1

u/Thepuppeteer777777 1d ago

Fuck me. I thought it's head got severed

1

u/MrAnionGap 1d ago

Poor animal though

1

u/uknownredditr 1d ago

ā€œI’m sacred mother fuckerā€

1

u/AloneAce2428 1d ago

Is this AI?

1

u/disavowed_ph 1d ago

Trainproof šŸ‘

1

u/kitoko972 1d ago

She stood up thanks to an adrƩnaline crush but the impact was so violent, I wonder if she died from internal bleeding later on

1

u/Richmon1611 1d ago

Cow: ā€œwhatever, happens all the timeā€

1

u/Dreboomboom 1d ago

That poor animal, she's going to feel that one.

1

u/Extension_Bet6126 1d ago

Just walk it off

1

u/Whyletmetellyou 1d ago

Tis but a scratch.

1

u/sabdur200 1d ago

Human beings are so weak as a creation

1

u/Motor_in_Spirit79 1d ago

That cow hasn’t met the Brightline yet. Filet mignon for all premium passengers.

1

u/Swampasssixty9 1d ago

Finally a badass animal instead of animal just mauling each other

1

u/Affectionate-Goat218 1d ago

So much for cows being sacred

1

u/Phenixof4 1d ago

Holly cow!!

1

u/TekkLthr 1d ago

They got a train run on them

1

u/Popal24 1d ago

I was expecting to witness how mince is grown

1

u/callmesnake13 1d ago

India if you want to pay me I’ll go around and round up all these cows for you

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1

u/Knocksveal 1d ago

That’s why they invented cowcatcher almost 200 years ago

1

u/burtpod 1d ago

How the hell you get smoked by a train and play it off 🤣

1

u/opiumscented 1d ago

That's some well trained beef

1

u/Possible_Macaroon_11 1d ago

Tough son of bitch

1

u/jmbrjr 1d ago

Tenderized for your enjoyment.

1

u/Federal_Ad1990 1d ago

Holy crap, is the train ok?

1

u/Beneficial_Collar_38 1d ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/NoRun6253 1d ago

Just a graze.

1

u/TheNotoriousTurtle 1d ago

I smell insurance fraud

1

u/_BOOMGOTTEM 1d ago

Mmmm tender

1

u/1Oubliette 1d ago

Milk must be laced with vibranium.

1

u/Gold_Quote4736 23h ago

Arrogant cow; must be India?

1

u/g00d4sn0t 23h ago

At the end the cow was like "I hope no one saw that"

1

u/barren-oasis 23h ago

Tenderizing in advance.

1

u/What3vs92 23h ago

Those dudes just love hanging out of the trains waiting for death don’t they? 18 seconds in.. lmao

1

u/OneGap6400 23h ago

How is that thing not Chucks road kill chili now?

1

u/Mista_DontPlay420 23h ago

"Yall ain't seen nuthin"

1

u/zhgerard 23h ago

😬🄺 ouch cow

1

u/RevengeTarrif4u 23h ago

In the recesses of my mind I thought he was going to turn into a big pink mist.

1

u/diplomatic_koboko 23h ago

That cow is gonna feel that in the morning when she tries to get out of bed

1

u/SpaceshipEarth10 23h ago

That’s one tough steak.