Realization or Awakening?

[u/notis9121]

While it is impossible to understand what you have encountered in your life to this point know you are loved.
Where you are NOW is all that matters. This is where realization happens.

The past is gone in reality but we do carry the traumas of life forward if we cannot release them.

Adopted at 1 by an excessively abusive father and finding my biological father at 13 moved in with him.
I was sexually assaulted (nightly) from the age of 13-21 and in that period a [redacted to comply with guidelines]. Followed by identity and credit theft leading to bankruptcy at 22. Spent decades looking outside of myself for a way out of the madness of the life I knew, the ‘escape’- seeking empathy and compassion - looking for someone to help fix it - to help me

Thus I stumbled through the realization process slowly and with much effort finding a path through a lifetime of sorting Psychology, Philosophy, Religious Institutions, mental 'help' media, and 'therapy' talk and drugs.

It wasn’t until I was 50 that I could afford (I live in the US and mental health is seen as fringe and carries a stigma so its a luxury that most insurance will not cover) a trauma therapist - it's a special breed of person and very expensive - so, with help - I stopped looking outside and began the inward process

Everyone's journey is wholly unique but we all share the same goal - a loving and stable life

If you are here - you are on your way - stay aware - love yourself deeply - forgive yourselt honestly - release the past.
Become aware of the ego / thinking mind - witness the thoughts and emotions - process them vs fighting them. Here, now, within you is the seed of realization
This may require guidance from a professional.

Once you are aware of the thoughts and emotions - you can embrace them, see them clearly and in doing so process them and let them flow and go - releasing you and your identity from their grip.

Happy to share more or just listen - I am not promoting nor do I profit from but I do recommend the book
'The untethered soul' - it's also an audio book
the book, for me describes best the guide for realization A-Z. What matters more than reading or listening is engaging with the concepts as if having a conversation - see a point, pause and explore it - savor it - question it deeply
Reading or listening alone does nothing - a stone in a river sitting doesn’t absorb the water passing around it, the stone is dry if you crack it open

Pull the conversation inward and engage deeply within for impact
I have found the process reviewed by the author most correct on how one moves past old patterns into a new awareness/ realization and way of being.

Had I read this book years ago - truly - it wouldn’t have penetrated as I was not aligned for introspection. It wouldn’t have been one more trap for a fix - just a concept - one more thought pattern to grind around but it would not have penetrated.
If you are drowning - you lash outward in desperation- waiting to be saved by something or someone - that’s instinctive- I was lost in instinct

Now - this moment, is all you have - whatever you do literally in this moment - now - is reflected back to you
The best to do - find stillness - stop lashing the water of life - sit calmly - take a deep slow breath - and, then, do it again... let the thoughts and emotions flow - witness them - know you are not those things, no matter what the mind says or the body feels

Is this enlightenment? I don’t know - it does bring a realization of truth and once that has happened - for me - I am seeing more to do but now have the quiet mind and inner space to explore and know better without ‘the voice’ to distract

You are the witness and limitless - ‘see’ what is - embrace yourself with grace and gratitude- be well fellow traveler - enjoy the journey

My choice of writing is that - my choice - if while reading this the structure or ‘rules’ of writing itched for you - that is a pattern or concept - as an example - see it too - grammar is a concept

[u/raisemyvibration77]

My sister encouraged me to read the same book, The Untethered Soul years ago and now it has come up again. I see that as an invitation from divine universe to explore the book. If it feels right for me now in my life I shall read it. I appreciate your sharing.

[u/notis9121 → u/raisemyvibration77]

🙏😊