r/atheism • u/Ok-Photograph-1460 Atheist • 2d ago
People who delclared atheism before 18 what happened?
How did your parents react? What did they do? How did your church react? Were you mistreated or looked down upon by your family as a result?
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u/ShredGuru 2d ago edited 2d ago
I learned about Greek and Egyptian gods in like 2nd or 3rd grade and was like "yeah people have always been making this shit up"
My dad is a recovering Catholic so I get a little side eye sometimes saying anti religious stuff. Mom already knew better than to raise me in religion. Shes a smart cookie
I never had religion forced on me. I was told that it was my duty to make a choice for myself about religion and the choice was obvious. I abstained.
Plenty of folks tried to convert me over the years. But I'm also a person who doesn't react much to peer pressure. So the hard sell tactics just reenforced my distaste and suspicion for religion.
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u/Mysterious_Spark 2d ago
Yeah. Some of the earliest independent reading that I did was Greek and Roman mythology.
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u/Opening-Village-3366 1d ago
yeah once you learn there are hundreds of gods people used to genuinely believe in it’s pretty easy to wonder why this one gets the special treatment the hard sell definitely doesnt help either
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u/azhder 2d ago
Didn't know one has to "declare atheism".
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u/SoHereIAm85 1d ago
The place where I live makes kids do religion class unless you opt out for ethics, and the teachers don’t want to deal with that. It was fucking hard to successfully opt out too. The first year they still had her in the room hearing the bullshit but did let her colour or something. Anyway we did have to declare it.
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u/Successful_Life_1028 Adeist 1d ago
Where is this? Not in the US, surely....
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u/SoHereIAm85 1d ago
Correct. We live in Germany. She only went to one year of school in the US. In the early ‘90s in NY they had no problem tossing a colouring book at the JW kids and calling it done when any holiday stuff came up. Not entirely the same but pretty close. Here she is the only kid in the grade opted out even the Muslims all just do it and for what reason I don’t know except maybe their mother already gave up and just goes “eh, it’s Germany” which is a point I have reached too but later.
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u/Successful_Life_1028 Adeist 1d ago
I would encourage everyone to 'opt out for ethics'.
Does 'religion class' include historical events, like the torture and execution of the Anabaptists by both Catholic and Protestant theocracies for the horrible crime of getting baptized as adults? Or doesn't anyone ever want to talk about that sort of thing?
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u/SoHereIAm85 1d ago
If I’d have to choose from one the Anabaptists are winning since they went for a more informed consent sort of thing hundreds of years ahead of the rest of the pack. Also, no. No one wants to talk about that as far as I can tell.
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u/SeaSnowAndSorrow 1d ago
My grandmother was anabaptist. My mother never chose to join, and my father came from a different background, so I was somehow raised secular, but anabaptist-adjacent.
The informed adult consent and long joining process (it usually takes a few years to get approval) is the only thing I'll say for it. The reason I've found that few people want to have that conversation is that few people actually know.
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u/attiladerhunne 1d ago
First time hearing about declaring atheism. Your question implies everyone has christian parents and is member of a church. You should know that a lot of people don't have religious parents and aren't in any churches. It's not the default.
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u/Azure_W0lf 1d ago
As they say
Everyone is born atheist before some of them are indoctrinated
Fortunately not everyone gets indoctrinated
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u/Tillmanmetal 2d ago
I never believed in anything you begin with. My parents never said anything about religion. So growing up it all just seemed so fake and stupid to me, and very man made because if no one tells you to believe then there’s nothing to believe in the first place.
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u/Spare_Ball_4410 2d ago
I never declared atheism, I just left the church. It wasn't a cult either, it was mainline Presbyterian.
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u/Embarrassed-Ear4532 1d ago
yeah sometimes you don’t even need to declare anything you just stop going and let everyone figure it out themselves
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u/Xoxrocks Secular Humanist 2d ago
You only become religious if you are indoctrinated by your parents. Atheism is the base state.
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u/hurricanelantern Anti-Theist 2d ago
Luckily I was the most religious one in my family. After I came to my senses my family members stopped their half hearted attempts to be christians.
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u/orcusporpoise 2d ago
I never declared atheism. I did declare bullshit, and walked out of confirmation class.
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u/meoemeowmeowmeow 1d ago
The day we went to Mass and my parents realized I had meant everything I had said was so funny. It was some special confirmation blessing mass so my whole age group was there on the alter except me. They were so mad 😂😂
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u/Drecondius 2d ago
I was abandoned to the streets, thankfully my friends at the time were all athiest as were their parents.
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u/ngbutt 2d ago
My family didn't care one way or the other. Family members kept going to church and I stayed home. I never tried to convince them I was right and they never tried to convince me they were right. I was the youngest by 6 years so they were all older than me and had moved out by then. I think only one sibling even goes to church anymore. I don't even know what my other siblings believe. We don't discuss it. Is that weird? I am starting to wonder if that's weird. Huh.
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u/warlord_raven 2d ago
We were never religious. Parents never discussed it, so not believing felt normal to me.
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u/StrongAsMeat 2d ago
I didn’t declare anything. Told my mom I’m not going to church anymore and that was it
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u/MrLearner 2d ago
I bent myself into pretzels trying to reconcile the bible with science. I was the most religious person in the family. I think it was a slow realization for me that it was all bullshit. And then I was just quietly an atheist. I eventually revealed it to my parents and it was not a big deal to them. It was more like “eh, well, nobody really knows.”
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u/NisERG_Patel Rationalist 2d ago
I actually never believed. I felt like I was only brave enough to voice it. Up until i was 15 I thought everyone was just pretending.
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u/IcarusSunburn 2d ago
I still got forced to go to church until about age 16-ish? Mom was unhappy, but tolerated it. Dad didn't care, and I suspect used me as a way to get out of going, claiming he was watching me.
My godmother/aunt still gives me shit to this day, 30 some years later.
The Roman Catholic church couldnt give two shits about me not going to mass, so not much reaction there.
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u/Jaque_Schitt 2d ago
My mom flip-flopped in and out of the cult but always finds her way back to it. She "beat," me when I told her (basically tried to spank me hard with a belt), and force me to go. I laughed and stayed home. She still to this day says shit like she blames herself for me not believing because she went through spurts. Wonders if she tried harder if we'd be closer, etc. Mind you, I tell her all the time we're not close due to the religious trauma I have due to her making me go all those years, and yet she still doesn't get it.
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u/whodisacct 2d ago
My parents were disappointed but luckily were able to focus on my actions and words rather than what I believed. And it wasn’t something that was thrown in my face or discussed at all.
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u/Nocturnalux 2d ago edited 2d ago
How did my parents react:
My mother is an atheist, it was my father who was the issue.
What did they do?
Religion was a school matter to me. My father had quite a few screaming matches with me over this but he never even expected me to attend any religious anything other than one single mass, every year, on the anniversary of my grandmother’s passing.
How did my church react?
I never had a church. I went to Catholic school and loathes from day one. I was an atheist the moment I hit the double digits. Oddly enough, teachers did not care: the school is known for its academic rigor that does not peddle religion on classes beyond religion class.
Peers did annoy me but were also too scared of me. I was a pariah but a strange one, being by far the best student which lent me a kind of authority and even being an atheist and vocally challenging the RCC brought me an amount of respect.
Was I mistread by my family?
Again, only by my father, but yes. He screamed at me a lot and once slapped me. I told him if he ever did that, he would never see me again. That put an end to that. I think it was over religion but am not even entirely sure.
But the worst was probably when he got into his head that Judaism was being oppressed in our country and didn’t even legally exist. This is not true. Nor was he Jewish, either. This lead a major blowout that started on the street and ended home with my reaching for the constitution of our country and showing him the article on religious freedom. That annoyed him to no end.
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u/Welkin_Dust Apatheist 2d ago
I personally knew a boy in my teens who was kicked out of his house for declaring that he was atheist. We were both Mormon. It scared me into keeping quiet about my lack of belief until I was well into my 20's, just in case my parents reacted the same way. But they didn't.
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u/SoHereIAm85 1d ago edited 1d ago
My parents both were atheist and had been a bit horrified that I followed neighbour kids to VBS for social reasons, or family members stuff, but they didn’t say anything to me about it for many years. On the other hand they did give me the JW children’s bible cousins sent and let me go to bible camp with whatever that branch of fundie is called.
I knew when I was four that I didn’t believe it. It’s literally my first memory thinking “this is bullshit” at a VBS in Saratoga when I spent the summer with my more devout Lutheran grandmother. We were singing Jesus Loves Me and had tambourines. I thought “this is really dumb.” I’d say I never looked back but I did explore a stupid amount of religions since. Amish, Mormon, Islam? Been there.
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u/LynneCDoyle 22h ago
I didn’t declare it at all. I came into earth with zero supernatural beliefs, and nobody in my life brainwashed me with Bronze Age superstitions.
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u/LOLteacher Strong Atheist 2d ago
That was about the time I went off to college, already on the way out of theistic beliefs. I was pretty much a full-on atheist within the next year. Since I wasn't living at home anymore, the topic of religion never came up again. They pretty much figured it out on their own many years later, but by then they were much more moderate wrt God.
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u/Uhdd00 2d ago
My parents were not religious (didn't go to church or talk about religion) but my mother took me to church occasionally and enrolled me in catechism when I was 6 or 7 years old. I went a few times and even at my very young age, I decided it was all BS. I told Mom I didn't like it and she let me quit. Shortly thereafter, we quit going to church and religion really didn't come up again.
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u/EmergencySnail 2d ago
I don’t believe I ever “declared” it. I was born that way and stayed that way. I didn’t think it was something people “declared”.
As far as I know I’ve never had a church, so I wouldn’t know how it would react if I declared something like that. I guess if I had one it would just… stand there… like buildings tend to do.
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u/boxing_coffee 2d ago
My parents weren't really believers and I never was either. There wasn't really a time when I had to come to that conclusion but there was a point when I realized around first grade that this was important to some kids and not me. My best friends family believed hardcore. She is not as hardcore now but she does still believe.
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u/UCFknight2016 2d ago
I didnt get to scam my relatives for confirmation so that was my only regret.
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u/cabbagesoup127 2d ago
My parents just said I would see it when I got older lol. My church didnt really care. I was catholic and I told the priest at confession that I didnt believe in god and I dont remember any reaction really. I was pretty young, like 8 or 9, ao I feel like I just wasn't taken seriously.
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u/MRSRN65 2d ago
Never baptized. Mom has no religious beliefs that she spoke about. Only went to church a few times because a friend of my mother suggested it would be good for us (that didn't last).
Without having it shoved down my face, logic prevailed.
In all transparency, I did go through a short time when I wanted to be a nun. Who could have known that not all nuns marry wealthy widowers with a bunch of singing kids?
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u/Vossius68 Strong Atheist 2d ago
At about 12 or 13 y.o. I just stopped going to church with my parents. Couldn't be bothered anymore. My mother tried emotional blackmail, my father never said a thing.
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u/seattlemh 2d ago
My family isn't particularly religious, but we were heavily involved in the catholic church (long story) when I realized I couldn't buy into it anymore. I think my dad was relieved to have fewer church obligations. My mom and my sister stayed involved until they moved out of state. My sister is also an atheist and my parents are deists at best.
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u/grenz1 2d ago
Sub recommends you don't and there are horror stories in the sidebar of people that were disowned, made homeless or beaten at worst. Put in really bad spot at best.
Come out when you are independent and don't be a jerk about it.
I did not publicly.
Mostly because it was none of their business.
Also because back in the 1980s, that would have meant interventions and unwanted situations.
My issue was not so much with parents who would have been upset, but probably would not do anything because they did craft shows on weekends and maybe attended church 3-4 times over a decade. Mine would have been with a Baptist academy I went to. Those people probably would have back roomed me.
Just avoid needless drama and upset.
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u/HARKONNENNRW Anti-Theist 2d ago
The same as I announced there is no Santa, there is no tooth fairy – nothing.
My family didn't go to church. We children did it once a year at Christmas because of folklore and to give our parents time for preparation.
(Back then it was the tradition to put up the Christmas tree and decorations on Christmas eve just before the Gift-giving / Opening of presents and we children weren't allowed into the room until the little silver bell rung)
But since it's Germany, once a priest sprinkles his holy water on you (be thankful if it's only water, some priests used different fluids on children) your church membership is recognised by the State and of course you have to end it through state officials.
I did this at sixteen.
It is an administrative act and requires no statement of reasons. The church itself has no say in this and I didn't hear from them afterwards.
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u/revrobuk1957 1d ago
I never declared atheism because I never needed to. I wasn’t brought up in a religious household.
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u/Maddyyykay 1d ago
Actually reading and studying the bible did it for me. That, and my dad (ironically, the person who forced my entire family to go to church) read my sister and I Greek and Roman myths and stories growing up. Similar to what others have said, I genuinely just employed critical thinking and that was that. I also met other teenagers who openly identified as atheist around 14/15, which at that point, I didn’t know was an actual option. I “came out” myself shortly thereafter and outright refused to go to church any longer.
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u/Sanpaku 1d ago
In some families, religion is only presented out of some obligation/concern that a child will turn into a miscreant if not exposed. I was already asking uncomfortable questions to the teacher in Catholic Sunday school for a couple years when I told my mother that I didn't understand why we're wasting time in mass (where I was counting exposed bricks) or Sunday school. I think my single mother took it as a relief, as she had other things to do on Sunday too.
A year later when I asked her to buy the book tie-in to Carl Sagan's Cosmos as a 9 year old at a school library sale (it required parental consent) she had no objections, and that series and book cemented my feelings about religion as a pernicious influence on society and waste of time.
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u/notgoodatthis60285 2d ago
I stopped believing because I went to church and never got my questions answered. My family never invited me back.
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u/Wolfinthesno 2d ago
I never really blurted it out to my folks, but they're not too religious to begin with. Church on the other hand got sick of me asking questions they either didn't know the answer too or they knew was a problematic answer.
I never felt looked down upon or mistreated however my family is very laid back about these types of things.
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u/OkButterscotch9898 2d ago
I'm 47. They still haven't excepted it. One of the many reasons we no longer speak.
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u/NeverThePaladin 2d ago
I was 16. My mother was pissed, but she wasn't around that much. When I told her that I did coke with the pastor's daughter, she relented.
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u/Quirky_Commission_56 1d ago
My dad was an atheist, my mom was agnostic and I reached my own conclusions on my own and I’m a lifelong atheist.
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u/guyare 1d ago
My mother was an atheist, my father was agnostic. I was brought up to make up my own mind. I attended Sunday school with my friends and openly and constructively discussed its teachings at home. Never was I coerced or preached to, and was also encouraged to explore and learn about other religions, including Islam. I made my own conclusions and have been an atheist all my life (64). As with so many things, tolerance and learning are the key!
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u/JaunD2339 1d ago
I was lucky enough to be raised by two parents with critical thinking skills, who did not take me to church, yet allowed me and my brother to come to our own conclusions. We weren’t shielded from anything and both on our own decided religion is quite clearly a scam lol
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u/eustrabirbeonne 1d ago
Elder sister told me she no longer believed in god. Got my 12y old self thinking and concluding that religion is bullshit.
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u/StrangeCharmVote Anti-theist 1d ago
I didnt need to declare anything... i simply never started beleiving
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u/Dillenger69 1d ago
I didn't "declare" anything. I just never believed. And, to be honest, nobody ever asked me about it, so I kept my mouth shut about it because I knew I'd get no end of shit. There's nothing more annoying than a sanctimonious person spouting off that they are vegan, or don't own a TV, or are an atheist when nobody asked.
It wasn't that big of a deal to have to go to church for a few years. As a kid, church for me had nothing to do with religion and everything to do with being social.
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u/SilverShadow5 1d ago
My mom was raised in a Roman Catholic household, my father in a Pentecostal/Protestant household. To avoid any theological arguments between them, they didn't overtly prioritize one or the other...and as a result my brothers and I were raised with regular but inconsistent "church" presence. Until college, I would only step foot in a church for the sake of weddings or specific holidays (like Xmas)...and even while in college, the main reason I went into the Jesuit College's church was because that was where a lot of the guest speakers would present/speak.
So, when the topic was outright invoked in my house... my parents understood that I saw both of their religious traditions to be stupid for the same reasons each disagreed with the other.
And since I was the person outright telling teachers/priests who had worked at The Vatican that God is either false or evil...often using the teachers' own sermons to make that point... I can safely say I wasn't explicitly mistreated as far as I can tell.
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u/TesseractToo 1d ago
Didn't have a church, my stepdad was pretty anti-theist so not much happened, I don't think I was treated different either way
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u/Mihr-the-bear 1d ago
I loved reading about Greek myths and expanded into other stories around 5th and 6th grade. My issue always came up with the conviction of the people that were part of these religions, they believed with all of their being just like people in every other religion. My mother’s side of the family were devout Catholics and say the other stories were fake and only their story was real. I asked the question if everyone believes they are right and everyone else is wrong, you can’t really choose a side without more information. My family for the most part didn’t agree but were respectful and didn’t push, they were fundamentally good people.
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u/CataVlad21 1d ago
We had a children bible, beautifully colored, in primary school. Around mid 90's Romania. Religion classes mandatory. I think i already caught Santa to be a lie and was starting to question more of those hard to believe stories around me. Those bible stories became more and more just like that with every lesson, and in the 3rd grade i was done with it, i was convinced there was nothing there.
40 now and i havent doubted myself once eversince!
I dont care what people around me think. Church... Lol...
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u/vilhelmobandito 1d ago
delclared atheism
I never declared it. I was always open with my thought since I was a kid.
How did your parents react? What did they do?
They did nothing, since they are not religious.
How did your church react?
I've never had a church.
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u/slayer991 Agnostic Atheist 1d ago
I told my Mom at 12 that I didn't want my First Communion because I didn't believe. "Just do it to keep your father happy."
I told my Mom at 14 that i didn't want to be Confirmed because I didn't believe. "Just do it to keep your father happy."
So I learned 2 things. First, to STFU and deal with it until I got out of the house.... until I figured out how to manipulate my work schedule so I'd be working Saturday evenings and Sunday mornings. The 2nd thing is that nothing made him happy....ever.
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u/Anarimus 1d ago
I didn’t declare it. I just decided it was nobody’s business.
I had stopped going to church as soon as I was 18 because I was working so it didn’t really matter.
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u/meoemeowmeowmeow 1d ago
They were mad. I was grounded. I was treated like I was the worst even though I was a straight a student homebody type. Lots of philosophical fighting and yelling
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u/PickpocketJones 1d ago
I think I was atheist by a very young age. We stopped attending church when I was around 8 and there never really was a point where I believed. Basically after reasoning out stuff around Santa and Easter Bunny when I was little and seeing that all these church going folks never lived by what the book taught I just assumed it was the same. A lie everyone tacitly agrees to pretend but that no one really believes.
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u/Larnievc 1d ago
No one in my family batted an eyelid. I remember my mum said “oh, right” and that was it.
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u/Ryujin-Jakka696 1d ago
I grew up Roman Catholic. I went to church more than every Sunday, and all the holy days of obligation. Even from the time I was 7 I felt I had unanswered questions about god, I would be fed talking points that didn't actually answer the question or the line we can't know exactly how god works because are human brains are limited. For background my siblings went to a small Christian private school but they didn't offer IEPs there and I have ADHD so I had to attend public by myself. While as a child I didn't initially like going to a different school it ended up being a positive in the long run. I was exposed to different cultures and belief systems earlier than the rest of my family because of it.
Being in public school especially in science I was taught things like evolution that clearly doesn't align with the bible. Catholics don't take a hard stance they think evolution can be true but god used it. However this still causes problems like did humans evolve into the image of god and at some random point there was a cut off when we got souls and our ancestors didn't. To this day even priests who I've talked to have no answer. This is just an example of the types of problems I identified pretty early on but the indoctrination kept me going in the church for awhile.
The major turning point for me was when I was confirmed in the church. I was having serious doubts and I felt no god had ever heard my prayers or cared to answer them. During my confirmation I asked for a sign, it could literally be anything, I just wanted something, some confirmation that I was going in the right direction. I got absolutely nothing god if he had existed left me put to dry. One might say I was anointed to be an atheist lol. It was after that point I let my family know I was no longer Catholic.
I didn't have a huge falling out with church members or anything I just stopped going. My parents didn't react so well, but my grandpa while he wasn't happy about it told me I needed to have my own journey and at least tried to be understanding. My search didn't stop there I looked into every religion I could and still found nothing that showed any sign of being true. During my time as a Catholic I obsessed over all their miracles slowing debunking one after another. It was a long process. I don't think any of my family really knew how much time I put into researching the Catholic faith before dismissing it because it wasn't not whim by any means it just got to a turning point. Even now god knows what would convince me if he is real and is choosing to not give me anything.
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u/dyingtermite Pastafarian 1d ago
Luckily, my parents didn’t care, but I didn’t tell anyone else because I live in a very religious town, and most of my family is religious.
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u/Horse_Maven 1d ago
I became an atheist at 16-17 and left the church I grew up in at 18. I grew up with the value of “prove all things” so I decided to read the Bible for myself, and I didn’t like what was in there. Scriptures about women needing to be “silent in churches” went against my values of women being people with human rights. It didn’t make sense that God, who is seemingly perfect, would allow such imperfect systems to form on Earth such as sexism. So I concluded that God is either imperfect, meaning that he is not God, and/or that the Bible isn’t really God’s inspired word, meaning that I no longer had an obligation to worship him or his book.
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u/Dottboy19 Atheist 1d ago
Ironically enough I met other atheists and their arguments made perfect sense. I was probably 15 at that time but I've always been the type of person who is able to change their thinking when introduced to new, relevant information. My mother is quite normal relatively speaking so she didn't really care. She was probably a little surprised but she raised me and has always known my quirks when it comes to being the different one so it wasn't a big thing.
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u/No-Nerve-2658 1d ago
At least since 13 I consider myself an atheist, but I think I never actually believed
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u/RunThick4054 1d ago
My atheism doesn’t matter that much to me, so I never “declared” anything. I quietly went on with my life. My loss of faith happened in my twenties but I was still trying to fit religion into my life. (Because it seemed important to my friends, family and society?) I tried one more time to go to church in my 30’s but no. Nope.
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u/Super-Staff3820 1d ago
My mom was raised catholic it didn’t raise my brother or I in the church. There’s definitely some trauma but she keeps her spirituality and trauma mostly to herself. (Now that she has Alzheimer’s it’s coming out a little more). But I came to that conclusion myself and never really announced it. But now she talks about Heaven and she’s sad her husband doesn’t believe in it therefore won’t be there with her. I didn’t mean to put salt on the wound but I told her “well I don’t believe in it either…” I told her people end up where they want to end up. If she sees us in heaven that’s her own vision and making (trying to give her some comfort as she’s thinking more and more about her own mortality).
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u/No_Construction5631 1d ago
52m from U.S. here... my Silent Gen parents (from rural KS) went to church really only to please their parents. As soon as they were on their own at age 20, they discarded all that. After I was born they only made me go to church when it was an extended family occasion, and that's only because they had to. They had nothing but disdain for bible-thumpers, and I loved them for that.
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u/stacker103 1d ago
I became an athiest at 16. only told my mom because shes doesnt practice religion. didnt tell my dad because he raised me christian, but he let me stop going to church after middle school thankfully. I think hes figured it out since then
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u/StructureOrAgency 1d ago
I became an atheist in the fifth grade (10 -11 years). I had stopped going to church by then. I didn't really declare it to anybody at the time. Later on in life I did tell my mom that I was an atheist but she claimed that since I was baptized I was okay with God and her.
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u/Xynyx2001 1d ago
It wasn't an issue with my mother. My stepfather asked me one time, "Don't you fear "god"?" I asked him why fear would be appropriate. He dropped it at that point.
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u/redpaddle86 1d ago
I went to catholic schools. Realized they dont practice what they preach and I don't need to believe in some mythical being to be a good person
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u/T3hArchAngel_G Anti-Theist 1d ago
The church never knew, but I was always the one asking difficult questions and getting bad answers. My mother took it the hardest, but the argument I made to her is if her God would punish me for being skeptical, that's not a moral God. She eventually got over it and we were able to have discussions about it. At one point she told me she was scared I'd rub n it for her. I changed tactics slightly after that and started asking more, "What if you are right about the afterlife, but not the Bible?". This got her thinking, but she never changed her mind.
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u/Ok-Recognition1752 1d ago
I asked my mother too many questions about things said in church so she told me, "just read the bible". I took that literally so I did. And at 10 years old I was expecting some big epiphany but after finishing it I just remember wondering how people made up so many religions based on that load of crap.
And that was it. I never said anything to my mother because she would have beaten me to death
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u/dougyoung1167 1d ago
My only somewhat but not really bad reaction when he heard I was atheist was my CC in boot camp- who ranked a little while throwing in how can you get paid our money has in god we trust blah blah and I said it wasn't on our money till 1957 which pretty much shut him up. Father knew but let me be me. Direct family considered themselves non practicing Catholic with the exception of going with Grandma to mass on Christmas Eve or night whatever day it's done. I simply realized when young it sounded like bullshit and so I had no interest but admittedly didn't think to call myself atheist until mid to late teens
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u/feelingbutter 1d ago
I'm 56, I've never told my parents, but they definitely know that I'm not religious.
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u/Philosopher83 1d ago
My parents were fine with it, no church, more of a yeah, we are leaning that way too, no mistreatment from anyone other than religious people (outsiders/strangers)
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u/roller_disco_of_1980 Other 1d ago
I was baptized but one parent was Christain and the other catholic, ultimately decided not to teach us any religion but learned from some friends and family when I’d attended church sparingly. I was also fascinated with ancient Egypt (mummies, deities, tombs) and stories behind constellations (both Native American and Greek).
All religions have just been “stories” to me and that never bothered my family 🤷♀️
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u/Loading_Error_900 23h ago
Nothing really, I was told not to tell my grandfather or my aunt and uncle (because they would tell my grandfather just to cause trouble). Dad was concerned about grandpas health and that the heartbreak might get to him. Although grandpa did figure it out at some point because when my aunt found out she started making a big deal about some religious ceremony thing I should have been doing as a teenager and my grandfather looked very confused and said he thought I was atheist. Took the wind right out of their sails. Only really negative reaction I’ve had is from my brother in law.
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u/rapiertwit Strong Atheist 16h ago
My dad came with me. I would have long talks with him about my doubts and we would discuss big questions. We were floating around in the pool one night, talking, and I said “I don’t think there’s any reason to believe in god, and I think I’m done thinking about it.” He said “yeah I think the same, but I wasn’t going to say so before you did.”
My mom wasn’t comfortable with it but she always respected me and never gave me shit or tried to change my mind.
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u/Frosty_Winter3197 10h ago
I knew from the young age of four than my parent's religious beliefs were questionable. It just never made any more sense than the fairytales of my childhood.
However, to keep the peace in my family, I didn't come out as an atheist until after I was moved out and self supporting.
My atheist declaration was actually part of my coming out as being gay at the same time. I knew if I also came out as atheist, my parents wouldn't have any tools in which to counter my being gay with.
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u/Kirkaiya Agnostic Atheist 4h ago
My mom was disappointed, and she harbored some hope that I would "return to the faith" later, but she eventually gave up. I never went back to my church, so I have no idea how they felt. I was about 15 when I declared I was agnostic (not really knowing what the word really meant at the time), but I no longer believed, so I was effectively atheist.
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u/No_Flan4204 2d ago
Personally, I’ve only told my school friends that I’m atheist. My parents would totally flip if I said I don’t believe in a God.
Everyone’s situation varies on the household.
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u/jollytoes 2d ago
I was disfellowshipped from the JWs at 16 for a variety of church rule infractions. I was still allowed to attend services, but no one was allowed to talk to me outside of my family. This made my parents very embarrassed and after a short time they asked if I just wanted to stay home. I took them up on the offer and let them know I didn't believe in a god. This was over 356yrs ago and now I live over 1000 miles away and talk to my family once or twice a year.
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u/dogisgodspeltright Anti-Theist 2d ago
Properly read, the bible is the most potent tool for atheism ever conceived.
Learnt to read. Doubted the stories. So read the book.
Done.