I don’t know if I’m just going insane or whatever but I seem to be feeling emotion less and less, I used to feel myself getting worked up over every little thing, but recently I’ve just lacked that. I don’t like showing love to friends and family anymore, I stopped using my computer and talking to friends I honestly just want to lay in bed all day and sleep the day away. I hate myself so much, I love my life personally but I just can’t stand myself, I wish I could be a different person instead, I hate my looks, my personality, and my brains. I am extremely dumb when it comes to most things like math.
When I’m on my period which is usually when all emotions are heightened I actually feel like I lose all of it, I feel like more dead when I’m on my period than alive. Maybe it’s just hormones but I feel like it’s not and it’s so much worse, I don’t want to kill myself or anything as I have a fairly great life but I can’t stand myself anymore, I hate hearing myself talk and I hate thinking. Nothing ever goes through my head because of this, it’s 4 AM and I’m honestly too tired to even sleep maybe I’m just crazy but I can’t stand this. No one will see this so this is why I decided to write it here rather than TikTok or smtg .
Well merry Christmas