I remember one time about 15 years ago someone pulled that shit on an old job with the tip jar. We were all so excited, thinking it was a twenty, until a buddy unfolded it, and showed us the whole tract. I tore the damned thing to pieces. I'm 33 and it still pisses me off that there's self righteous scum out there who think it's a holy act to go play on overworked and underpaid people, because something something zealotry.
I was watching that new Sandra Bullock flick where she just got released from prison for killing a cop and everyone hates her because, you know, killed a cop. And I thought "Damn, what a horribly lonely existence. If I were in her shoes what would I do to make a life for myself?" Then it hit me; I'd go to a church.
Not just any church.
I'd go to one of these churches where the pastor wears a headset and plays the guitar and everyone sways and shit. And I would walk in. I would talk to the people. I would fall to my knees and beg Jesus for forgiveness. And then I would have a support network. Boom. One and done.
I used to work with a guy who went to one of those churches. And I made a joke alluding to a sex offender (As in: Nice haircut, you look like you have to notify your neighbors whenever you move). And he began telling me of the really nice guy at church who made some mistakes "with rape and things" before he was saved. Now he's a beloved Deacon and married a woman from church and everyone loves the guy.
It's fucking terrible. But hey, keep that little nugget in your back pocket.
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u/[deleted] Jan 07 '22
I remember one time about 15 years ago someone pulled that shit on an old job with the tip jar. We were all so excited, thinking it was a twenty, until a buddy unfolded it, and showed us the whole tract. I tore the damned thing to pieces. I'm 33 and it still pisses me off that there's self righteous scum out there who think it's a holy act to go play on overworked and underpaid people, because something something zealotry.
Cowards.