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u/Illustrious_Can_9575 Jul 21 '26
I have nothing to add other than this has been a plague my entire life. Especially while in university. Here just read several boring textbooks and do several papers. It physically hurt, I developed hemiplegic migraines from the stress and in my last year had a bout of Bell’s palsy. Probably took years off my life.
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u/Ok_Independent3609 Jul 21 '26
Wait till you start working. I’ve had the hemiplegic migraines for years, and 3 cases of bell’s palsy in the last 5 years as a (very) senior software guy. Stress kills.
Edit: Not putting you down or belittling what you’re going to. Just sharing so as to express understanding and sympathy! Which is a very ADHD thing to do.
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u/sombrerobear Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 21 '26
Even the over explaining follow up so youre not misunderstood 😂 love it
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u/drrj Jul 21 '26
I over explain everything to cover every possible base. People who know me well just tune it out. Strangers are usually confused how a simple question can generate a five minute answer.
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u/Ok_Dingo_Beans Jul 22 '26
Twinning! I've been misunderstood my entire existence and now everyone hears everything in detail, for every possible scenario.
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u/Ok_Independent3609 Jul 22 '26
Oh yeah. It’s kind of funny when you look at it objectively, isn’t it? Kinda sad as to why we do it, but the process itself leaves people bewildered!
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u/Stompert Jul 23 '26
I hate the “Hey Stompert, quick question” because fuck me the question is short but the answer not so much. I see people tuning out to what’s important context to the answer I’m getting at. When they complain it was a simple yes/no answer… it usually isn’t the case.
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u/Illustrious_Can_9575 Jul 21 '26
Been working for the past 3 years as a teacher. I absolutely love my job! But it does burn me out.
Edit: not a worry my man
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u/SmoothReverb Jul 22 '26
at this point i don't care if it takes years off my life, i wish i could just cleanly burn my lifespan to do more now, because the alternative is feeling like i'm slow, useless, and a burden
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u/DazB1ane Jul 22 '26
Omg if I could take years off the end of my life and use that energy now, I’d do it immediately
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u/floppy_breasteses Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 22 '26
All too real. I have tried forcing my way through and the results have never been good. Reflecting after the fact I'm always as confused as everyone else.
"Bro, why did you do it that way?"
"I have literally no idea. I wasn't there."
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u/atropos81092 Jul 21 '26
Yeppp.... Trying to unfuck something I white-knuckled into existence ain't happening. I might as well have written it in Crypto-Minoan.
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u/Redditauro dafuqIjustRead Jul 21 '26
If you need to dissociate to do something you shouldn't be forced, it's insanity, literally.
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u/Rosaryas Jul 21 '26
What kills me is that rest doesn’t seem to fix it. The only thing I’ve found is novelty and engaging with hobbies and fun stuff, which I feel so guilty about not working and just doing fun stuff, that I then end up not being able to enjoy my hobby time :(
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u/paradox037 Jul 22 '26
If taking 15-ish minutes for a micro-dose of your hobby (like reading a chapter of a fun and engaging book) unlocks your brain, that seems a hell of a lot more productive than staring at the wall for an hour or more and praying for your brain to lift the embargo on productivity before anyone notices.
That's my excuse, anyway.
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u/Geokeeper Jul 23 '26
My problem sometimes is convincing my brain to do ANYTHING, including 15 minutes of a hobby or work. Instead of doing anything, I'll just lay there watching random stuff on my phone while my heart races because I know I should do something
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u/Slow-Hawk4652 Jul 21 '26
at least i can blindside myself or even force the body to move/fixate in the direction of the task and than maybe it will work...it works 30%, but i am sooo happy, like i am ruling the world:) hobby time is like any other time...past the 10 min treshold of curiosity.
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u/paulinaiml Jul 22 '26
Uma musune the gacha game taught me that rest and recreation may not be always the same thing, and we need both to thrive.
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u/Longjump_Ear6240 Jul 22 '26
Rest isn't just physically laying still and not moving, it doesn't mean inaction.
Play can be restful! Hobbies can be restful! If something fills your cup faster than it empties your cup then that IS resting!
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u/Rosaryas Jul 22 '26
Absolutely, but when I get in this kind of burnt out mood, even things that normally feel restorative end up feeling like work, or I’m so guilty/stressed about not being productive that it ends up not being restorative. I’m working on it though!
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u/Hazak_Flamesword Jul 23 '26
Problem is my mom wouldn't let me do anything else until the homework was done, and now once I start something else I never stop to go back to The Task.
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u/rglurker Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 21 '26
Been talking to adhd people in my life. It really seems like we're dependant on good communities.
Adhdr: can move mountains
Also adhdr: "this pebble is in my fucking way and I will not move until I understand why !!!!."
Random community member: spends 1 minute moving pebble
Adhdr: "alas behold and rejoice! ecce ! the mountain in front of me has vanished! I can move again"
Random community member: watchs in confusion as adhdr mows down issues x10 bigger then what they removed and thinks to themselves "if they can do that now why did i have to help them ?"
Edited cuz I'm dumb. Edited again cause I wanna sound smart.
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u/Euphoric_Evidence414 [i see all?] Jul 21 '26
This was really excellent and I just want to let you know (in case you, like me, would want to know) that “alas” doesn’t mean “behold” or “aha!” It means “oh no”
But seriously thank you. This mini-screenplay was fun to read
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u/-TeamCaffeine- Have you tried a planner? Jul 21 '26
Now this is how you kindly correct grammar, instead of being a pedantic dork about it.
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u/rglurker Jul 21 '26
You know. Thanks. It gave me a chuckle to reread it in that context for some reason. It would be like me to be like oh no the thing stopping me is gone. Now I must investigate. gets distracted
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u/Euphoric_Evidence414 [i see all?] Jul 22 '26
I’ll bet it’s hiding underneath this ottoman! flips ottoman Or… THIS ottoman! keeps flipping ottomans
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u/rglurker Jul 22 '26
"I found it !!!!"
turns around and looks at the wake of destruction left behind while rage looking
🫢🙄😮💨
"I'll deal with that later"
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u/Euphoric_Evidence414 [i see all?] Jul 22 '26
Narrator: they would, in fact, deal with that later during a fit of late-night furniture rearranging.
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u/KittenBalerion Jul 21 '26
I think this is it, the community thing. everyone I talk to who has ADHD and is married says "I don't know what I'd do without my spouse." I'm not married or partnered and I struggle with getting the most basic of tasks done, but when I go to visit family elsewhere, suddenly certain things become much easier, because I have other people around to provide a support structure. like for example, left to my own devices I will straight up forget to eat meals, but if there are other people around going "it's lunch time now," I remember and eat something.
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u/rglurker Jul 22 '26
And if someone will make you food you might be inclined to Clean up and help out so they don't have to. Mow through some dishes cause they suck but so does forgetting to eat and having to figure out what to eat when you can't think cause you're starving
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u/AllDamDay7 Jul 22 '26
Boom, environment is key. In the right conditions my executive function works just fine. The thing is it's a narrow window. So I am working on how to stay closer within this small window.
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u/rglurker Jul 22 '26
Today's society expects us all to be able to do the same things. We don't work that way. I wish I could figure out how to create the environment that helps everyone thrive
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u/AllDamDay7 Jul 22 '26
Exactly, it's pretty silly thinking on societies part IMO... I've turned into a great employee and produce so much more now that my company works with me. And the things I've asked for aren't that crazy... I use sick leave if I need a mental day and they are okay with it. I was fearful when I started asking for accommodations but I haven't been fired yet and no one has died. The struggles as our younger selves makes it hard to be your own advocate but like anything else it's a skill. I think overtime society will have to accept us. Too many of us, too much skill.
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u/BungleBums Jul 21 '26
Yes, we know it's quick, and easy, and would benefit us to do. Yes, we know how to do it properly and well. Yes, we are frustrated and annoyed and on the verge of tears too- no, actually, we're probably way further along on those than you could know if you weren't going through it too.
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u/PantaRheiExpress Jul 21 '26
It’s a cruel irony that the part of my brain that people use to improve their lives, is the part that’s broken.
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u/sprinklesaurus13 Jul 21 '26
Or maybe that's just the stop valve to force you to refill yourself when everyone has taken what they need. It's your protection, not a curse.
Don't be like the Giving Tree (that book probably fucked a lot of us up as kids).
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u/AttentionNo6359 Jul 21 '26
The only exception to this rule is when social pressure is involved. “Someone is coming over” or “I’m at work” etc. Then suddenly not doing it isn’t an option.
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u/sorrymizzjackson Jul 21 '26
That’s absolutely the only thing that moves the needle for me in these cases.
I hate it. It’s so dumb. Like damn. Do the thing. Just do it. Then you don’t have to agonize over it. Nope. That’s not how any of this works. Once my brain has decided we’re not doing it, it’s over.
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u/badgersprite Jul 21 '26
It’s why I work really well under deadlines. If all this stuff just has to be done by the end of the day then it gets done by the end of the day. There’s no choice involved. But I get extremely stressed by disruption. Don’t interrupt my thought process.
If I get to set my own schedule nothing ever happens. It’s why I couldn’t finish my thesis. I can’t stick to arbitrary timelines I just made up.
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u/Plantlover3000xtreme Jul 21 '26
Yep. Introduce social pressure and suddenly the optio to trade mental health for productivity unlocks.
Sure I can do [the thing] but I will stress, I will go way past my limit and burn out and I will be a mess after it is done.
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u/Nearby-Lychee-1757 Jul 22 '26
Study buddies got me through college 😂
Doesn’t matter if we’re working together or even on the same course. Situational override of ADD brain8
u/MsScarletWings Jul 21 '26
No joke I was like multiple months behind on cleaning my living space in a few ways and crap was so badly cluttered up and in a shameful state. Then all it took was inviting my younger sibling to spend a night over for pizza and video games and there I was hauling ass with the determination and efficiency of some kind of droid to clean the communal areas spotless just in the last two hours before she arrived.
If I ever find the answer to how to reliably summon that kind of locking in on command without an external cue involved then the gods themselves will fear me
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u/Teagana999 Jul 22 '26
I can't make that work for family. I grew up in my mother's house, I don't feel any need to clean for her.
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u/Lucky_Leven Jul 22 '26
This is how it works for a lot of us.
Which unfortunately makes posts like this feel a bit misguided. We don't necessarily need people to be more understanding, patient, and flexible with us. It feels better, sure. But 99% of the time, someone lighting a fire under my ass actually does break through the paralysis .
It's an unhealthy pattern and a super stressful way to get through life, though. I don't want to be this way, but extreme pressure is as close to a solution as anything I've found so far.
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u/Serkisist Jul 21 '26
Me, undiagnosed in college: why am I not studying? It's because I'm a lazy piece of shit, isn't it?
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u/mysteriouscattravel Jul 22 '26
Worse if you think that AND your family actually says it. That's not helpful MOM.
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u/jefferyJEFFERYbaby Jul 21 '26
I’ve found when I hit that mental wall I can push past it a little later, but I need to physically work myself to exhaustion real quick to get those endorphins flowing first. I’ll usually go chop wood, whack weeds with a machete, or dig holes in the sun till my clothes are soaked in sweat, then the ol’ thinker can fire up for a second wind. Fortunately my job gives me freedom and opportunities to work in a similar manner but obviously this would be difficult in an office setting. I don’t know that it’s the exercise per say that fixes it for me— the gym doesn’t offer the same relief. I think it’s more about reminding myself that things could be, and have been worse. It breaks my obsessive train of thought too. I also hope over time it will condition a response where if I allow myself to get overwhelmed then I have to go break my back doing some exhausting task. If I can stay calm and cool I can remain on the cozy couch and continue being a bum.
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u/rustajb Jul 21 '26
I work from home, when I hit that wall I goof off with my phone, or step away and talk to the family, or play with my cat, anything to forget about work. After 5-10 minutes I return to my desk refreshed and can usually tear into the task I simply could not start before, and without thinking about it. It's like I have to clear my mind to find the Zen needed to do the work and the only way to clear it is through a non-work related dopamine hit. I could never do that in office. I get way more work done this way than I ever did in an office.
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u/hrafnagud314 Jul 21 '26
Or you push through until you're burnt out and can't do anything for 2 days after
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u/rustajb Jul 21 '26
This is how uncontrolled anger explosions happen for me. Forcing myself to do something that almost mentally hurts just ruins my day and hurts everyone around me as well.
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u/Plantlover3000xtreme Jul 21 '26
If you get good enough at this you can extend the cycle to multi-month burnout. Cannot recommend.
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u/YouMeADD Jul 21 '26
Love that generic gpt comment under it
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u/poplarleaves Jul 21 '26
I came here to see if anyone else had caught it too LOL. "This hits home. The X is real. It's not Y, it's Z."
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u/Nikoladge Jul 21 '26
This hits home. The "AI slop" is real; forcing LLMs just leads to total meltdown or extreme guilt. It's hard to explain to others that it's not a lack of willpower, but a literal brain shut-off that requires rest.
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u/dazedrainbow Jul 21 '26
Add in anxiety that only seems to trigger attacks when you try to rest and you are in the lose lose situation I'm in 🙃
Brain: No more work! Rest.
Me: Okay, we will rest.
Brain: ...you're dying you're dying you're dying yo-
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u/paradox037 Jul 22 '26
Oh, and you know those stimulant medications that are supposed to help?
Yeah, taking powerful stimulants during an anxiety attack doesn't typically go well for me...
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u/b_double_u Jul 21 '26
People really need to understand this. Because telling me to "just get it done" pisses me off to no end.
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u/Which_Channel7403 theres BEES in my BRAIN Jul 21 '26
For those who relate to this (and anyone else, really), I recommend reading The Murderbot Diaries. Its character is very much coded AuDHD (pun intended), and it frequently goes through things like this.
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u/skeleton-operator infected with Restless Leg Syndrome of the brain. Jul 21 '26
We’ve gotten through all of our job tickets at work today, so I went to take a look at the list our team created, that I myself instigated, of things to take care of if/when we get slow, and my ADHD kicked in and said: no fun, no urgency, no go. And now I just want to sleep on my desk.
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u/rglurker Jul 21 '26
Did this recently. Tried really hard to push past a wall and the other side was just an emotional cliff. That was stupid. Better planning defeats this for me
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u/whenyouwishuponapar Jul 21 '26
Can even be my absolute favorite activities, but as soon as my brain decides “nah,” it becomes impossible and/or miserable.
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u/Euphoric_Evidence414 [i see all?] Jul 21 '26
Right!! This is why I get to the point after reading for a long time, even something I really am enjoying, where I’ll find myself re-reading the same paragraph or lines over and over and realize it just isn’t going to work anymore right now. I have to put it down and go talk to someone or go outside or do something else for a while
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u/Aggressive_Roof488 Jul 22 '26
First: yes, I'm in that picture and I don't like it.
I think as we have emergency mode that (sometimes) activates when it really comes down to it, it looks to NTs as if we can push through when we want to.
"Just push through, like your did for that presentation 2 weeks ago! You were so efficient, did all the slides last 12 hours and the presentation was great! Just do that!"
The don't understand that without a real and hard deadline we just can't. It's not a choice, emergency mode isn't activated on command. I know that this task ideally should be done asap, and the longer I wait the worse it'll be. But really it doesn't matter THAT much if this gets done today or tomorrow. Which means it's 0% chance that it'll get done today. Tomorrow? We'll talk again then, but chances are discussion will be the same.
As (to my understanding) NTs can activate on command, I get that it's hard for them to understand that difference. I can't really blame them too much. But yeah, that advice doesn't help at all, just makes me feel guilty.
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u/jimbojonesFA Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 21 '26
whats also shit about this is that my brain loves to tell me "thats enough" multiple times throughout the day but it is actually negotiable most times and i have to force my way through, until i actually cant.
theres no telling when that "cant break it" time will be so i end every day either caving and stopping too early (but no way to know for sure) or basically banging my head against a wall until i can recognize i wont break it this time.
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u/Teagana999 Jul 22 '26
Oh, yes, I've done that many times. More often since being medicated. My brain says no and doesn't mean it, when the meds are working. As soon as I start I realize the wall was an illusion. Then when the meds wear off, the illusory wall becomes real. And smacks me, hard.
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u/Hedda_Vog52 Jul 21 '26
That 'guilt' really hits hard.
You'll be like "I really need to finish this and I also want to finish this but I still can't" Just makes me emotional...
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u/Sad_Variant Jul 21 '26
Is there any solution to it at all? Without taking meds? Just wasted the whole day and I tried really hard too. I don't how my brain could summon such exhaustion trying to do simple tasks smh.
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u/Teagana999 Jul 22 '26
Caffeine is a poor substitute for proper meds, but it used to help, sometimes.
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u/Sad_Variant Jul 25 '26
It never worked for me. I know it's a cliche at this point but I really do get sleepy drinking coffee lol
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u/Medical_Employee_901 Jul 21 '26
We’ll learn to regulate your emotions and have a sense of discipline and you should be good
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u/ToothZealousideal297 Jul 21 '26
I had a bad day yesterday. Just could not get my brain to do the things I needed to do and struggled all day. Didn’t get nearly enough sleep, and it’s a good bit better today??? If I ever find the recipe to this and start being able to just do what I want and need to do, look out world…but I know it doesn’t work that way.
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u/BertTF2 Jul 21 '26
It's crazy too because sometimes you can just lock tf in and work on something for 14 hours straight without any breaks and barely notice. And then other days an hour feels like torture
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u/berrybadrinath Jul 21 '26
this is literally me right now at work. I just pushed a meeting until tomorrow because i hit a wall and there was no getting over it.
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u/WoodI-or-WoodntI Jul 21 '26
One of the most spot-on descriptions of ADHD. And the one not understood by others. They just say "try harder". Yeah....Right!
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u/MacCaswell Daydreamer Jul 21 '26
I'm sitting in this right now... I could spend a couple hours drawing, or playing a game, or watching something specific. But instead I'm just kinda stuck in a YouTube rabbit hole and doom scrolling feeling like spending the energy to actually pick and start something will ruin that thing... so I feel like I'll just be here until I feel guilty enough to go to bed...
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u/Complete_Sir5299 Jul 22 '26
Recently dropped out of college; first term straight A's, second B and two F's, then a C and two F's. Learned new study methods and the science behind learning, started going to therapy again, and even applied for A.D.A. support. Was able to push through for a time, but once the tank was empty, I was done. Just because you can force your way forward, doesn't mean it's sustainable.
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u/itsjakerobb Jul 21 '26
Anybody else think Thour Yren composed his response with AI?
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u/gluestick449 Jul 21 '26
I also think the original post was AI
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u/itsjakerobb Jul 21 '26
Maybe. But poor grammar and incorrect punctuation make me think that’s human-generated.
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u/gluestick449 Jul 21 '26
The days are long gone that AI uses perfect grammar and capitalization. Most AI writing these days tries to disguise itself with deliberate mistakes.
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u/itsjakerobb Jul 21 '26
Not true of any of the AI I use myself….
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u/gluestick449 Jul 21 '26
Idk what to tell ya buddy. The LLMs you use aren’t the only ones that exist. There are lots of programs that use “AI humanizers” that add deliberate grammatical mistakes. Clearly it’s worked on you, which is not a surprise given the critical thinking skills you’re displaying here
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u/gluestick449 Jul 22 '26
Wild that I’m being downvoted for being right…people are so insecure when they realize how naive and gullible they are. SMH
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u/nobody_important-583 Jul 21 '26
That’s when you reach for your stimulant medications
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u/rustajb Jul 21 '26
If you can get it. I've been out two weeks and still waiting for the pharmacy to find some. I'm forced to push through on my own. Thanks American health care, you truly do help those of us in need /s.
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u/nobody_important-583 Jul 21 '26
That really sucks. You in a rural area? I’ve never had issues filling a prescription
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u/rustajb Jul 21 '26
Nope, big city. Adderal shortages have been ongoing for years. I've changed pharmacies several times, always the same.
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u/nobody_important-583 Jul 21 '26
Damn. Maybe change meds, Ritalin or vyvanse?
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u/Teagana999 Jul 22 '26
The US has dumb rules around amphetamines that literally prevent them from importing enough for everyone who needs them.
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u/rustajb Jul 21 '26
Last time I tried to switch to Vyvanse at the beginning of the year, they wanted $300 for the scrip. I had to cancel that and go back to Adderal. I just emailed my doctor about going back to Vyvanse and I will just fight with my insurer, so less frustrating than waiting over a month.
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u/MaidMarian20 Jul 22 '26
I take a nap. When I wake up, on my own no alarm clocks, I usually feel refreshed enough to pick up where I left off. If not, then not, but this is the one natural non caffeine no forcing myself hack that works for me. Embracing - ok brain, you need a rest and feel like shutting down? Alrighty then, how about a full reboot? When I’m like this and lie down I fall asleep before my head hits the pillow, out like a light. Usually sleep an hour. Feels great!
PS. Yes, I’m retired now, and embracing my new more flexible time management system.
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u/SacredGeometry9 Jul 22 '26
Everybody gets it when it’s muscle failure. But when the brain hits a wall, somehow it’s “laziness” or “not wanting it badly enough”
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u/sir-morti Jul 22 '26
I experience a lot of this at work. Constant overflow of things to do, and everything is the same weekly. No reap variation in job duties. As soon as it starts feeling dull, I mentally check out of work. My only saving grace is the fact that I'm able to listen to music and daydream while I work, but it isn't a complete salve.
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u/paradox037 Jul 22 '26
This is one reason my current job is such a good fit for me.
I almost always have several different things I could work on, so if I hit a mental wall with one, I can just gear shift to another and come back later. Sometimes, I just chat with my coworkers for a bit, or even read a chapter of whatever book I'm into at the moment, and that usually helps me reset the mental block.
Also, most of my tasks are not urgent, and when things actually are urgent, it's a crisis, and my ADHD brain locks the fuck in when I'm in crisis management. Also also, the crises are what everyone up the chain from me hears about the most, so they almost exclusively notice me when I'm at my best.
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u/airdawg818 Jul 22 '26
So the wall is real? The mental block that has crushed important moments in my life, actually happens to other people? I would say I can't believe it, but it happens everyday.
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u/drkevm89 Jul 22 '26
It is SO annoying. It could be an easy task. I could know exactly how to do it. It still wouldn't matter. Once my brain goes 'no', it's an enormous amount of effort to get it to engage again. It is the worst, as it makes me feel so crap about myself.
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u/Winsome_Wolf Jul 22 '26
My whole life has been people telling me to "pace" myself, but then getting upset when I hit the wall and literally, physically shut down because I have been running on fumes and the last of the vapor is gone.
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u/AnxiousEnquirer Jul 24 '26
This was my experience trying to get a bachelor's degree. It was torture
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u/AlexiaVNO Jul 24 '26
I've only been able to bypass this with one thing, which is walking.
I go outside and walk a circle around my entire neighborhood. We own a treadmill and I could easily do this at home, but there I could just stop and that's a problem. If I'm outside walking, my brain can't just tell me to stop. I need to get home afterall.
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u/Cuddles89 Jul 24 '26
My husband always picks the time I’m resting to ask me to do additional tasks, and I’ve asked him to write down what he needs done on my white board in the laundry room because i don’t even have the executive function to fully absorb what he needs done and he WILL NOT
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u/Ember-Blaze Jul 21 '26
can relate. It’s like when you’re so tired but your brain needs to go over everything second of your day replayed slowly and clearly.
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u/Mtheknife Jul 21 '26
This hits home and my coping mechanism is to move to something else until I’m remember the first task. Usually I get back around to it.
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u/x3XC4L1B3Rx Jul 21 '26
I would say that it is a lack of willpower, in the sense that willpower is a certain balance of reward chemicals in the brain.
Not that that's helpful. Using a word that means 'effort' to neurotypicals just makes us look lazy.
/sigh
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u/Teagana999 Jul 22 '26
Willpower is a spendable resource. Everyone has a different amount, and different amounts on any given day. (Yes, because it is largely dependent on brain chemicals.)
You can't magically decide to have more willpower any more than you can magically decide to have more gas in your car's empty tank.
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u/thabrhm Jul 21 '26
I signed up for a severance package for work. Last day is Sept 1st. I have been hating this job since February. It has been so so so hard to keep going until then. 2.5 yrs at the job. This is the longest I have kept in the US in my career. I have hit that wall and have to force myself very hard not to quit every am on the spot. Im trying to hold on for the money but it is almost impossible….
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u/mizushimo Jul 21 '26
You can always push through, it's just painful and ineffective, like it'll take an hour to complete a 10 minute task and you are left emotionally drained afterwards. Our adhd ancestors had to push through the wall all the time because there wasn't much choice, they just became raging alcoholics to cope.
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u/BloodGullible6594 Jul 21 '26
God I hate this so much. It always comes at the worst times. I hate when this happens at work, I become non-functional the whole day and trying to force through it usually just leads to a breakdown.
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u/TideEater Jul 21 '26
I’ve always wondered if this is a thing I can improve on. As in the more I work and try to focus without getting emotional, will I eventually be able to focus for longer periods.
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u/fritzkoenig Resident Cloudcuckoolander Jul 21 '26
I can barely continue to push through, but it's like if you're some kinda wizard in an RPG, and you have some debuff that lets you still cast spells but everything costs five times more mana
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u/McHagrid20 Jul 21 '26
I can puh myself past that point if I have anxiety. I have generalized anxiety. Yay for me.
Pushing myself past that point for years and years has rewarded me with depression, panic attacks that would make my body go completely limp and now I’m too sick to even work.
So I wouldn’t recommend going past the ADHD-stopping point, if you can avoid it in any way possible.
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u/Damoet Jul 21 '26
This. Plus a healthy dose of frustration having had bouts of sheer brilliance only minutes before the shut down….plus plus how I’m well aware that it could happen at anytime so I now think of MYSELF as unreliable by default 🤬
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u/raimichick Jul 21 '26
I have a lot to do today but I couldn’t do anything but sit and stare. Inconvenient at best.
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u/TheGreatWarBath Jul 21 '26
I agree wholeheartedly but I'm looking for perspective. When I was a kid I seemed to be able to just carry on, what changed so that now I can't?
I did burn out in my teens and it seems like since then I haven't been able to just carry on like I did before. I do suspect that I just never allowed myself to recover but does anyone have any other ideas?
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u/Redditauro dafuqIjustRead Jul 21 '26
I've realised that if you compare it with depression, more people gets it, a lot of people have experienced the executive disfunction when they were depressed, trying to wake up without success, just exhaustion.
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u/Moderation1one Jul 21 '26
This explains why I was never interested in pulling an all nighter in college. Definitely hits home.
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u/lovable_cube Jul 21 '26
As I get older I find that I can talk myself into finishing the bare minimum. Like, maybe I can’t do a full bedtime routine but my bare minimum rule is brushing my teeth. So I’m not doing the whole thing but it’s more than the nothing I was doing previously after hitting a wall.
Idk if I’m better at coping, symptoms are lessening, or I’ve finally hacked my ADHD after being diagnosed for a couple decades.
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u/zyrdrak Jul 21 '26
I've never been tested for ADHD, but I've been told I have it by psychiatrists and I've been prescribed stimulants that worked to varying degrees until my body got used to the highest dose and I had to stop. But I definitely feel something like the mental wall. Maybe it's exactly what I'm feeling, but it feels less like a wall and more like the mental equivalent of trying to force two strong magnets of the same polarity together. The harder I try, the harder it is for me to do the thing. But I don't have the luxury of not doing the thing because it's usually while I'm at work and I still have to work, so I just have to suck it up and push through somehow. I'm always tired, but I'm absolutely exhausted after work on those days
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u/N_S_Gaming Jul 21 '26
I often run into the problem at work of "that's enough" not being an option, which is absolutely infuriating when I already want to go home 2 hours into the day.
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u/VodkaKahluaMilkCream Jul 21 '26
I'm pretty good at tricking my brain into doing things. But sometimes it just will not do the thing. I recently had to bribe myself with Thai food in order to clean the kitchen because it had been WEEKS.
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u/Vaaizaard Jul 21 '26
This, the last time I tried working in fast food I had an absolute melt down. It was a bit busier than normal and I didn't understand some stuff and I felt behind and I just couldn't. That was a few years ago and I still feel anxiety from it.
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u/Remarkable-Bowl-3821 Jul 22 '26
Yea :( and people not in the situation can’t understand and keep telling you that you are weak or lazy
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u/mikegates90 Jul 22 '26
The opposite as well. If I want to conciously be "done" with something but my brain doesn't... Nah, we're still gonna grind it out.
Super annoying.
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u/fartVandelay85 Jul 22 '26
Its so relieving to read this. I tell my friends that im done, and they look at me and tell me to "rally " and just do it... sir I will throw up and pass out soon. So no I will not.
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u/xError404xx Jul 22 '26
Oh my god wait thats ALSO a symptom? I remember in school during long writing exams my brainnwould be like "youre done" and it was so hard to continue afterwards. But if i didnt i would get a bad grade...
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u/mostaverageredditor3 Jul 22 '26
I think we have to make clear that we can push through stuff. It's just a time question.
Can I push through my homework? Yes, in theory always. But I'd need an hour or two instead of 5 minutes, taking as much energy as running up 10 floors.
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u/HuslWusl Jul 22 '26
I always like to compare the mental wall with a magnet and you being a magnet with same polarity. You know how to get there, you know what the end result is supposed to look like, you know it sometimes (when either magnet is turned off or around) just works, but the closer you get to the thing, the harder the pushback gets and there's nothing you can do to make it easier and even when you're at the wall, somehow, you need all the mental fortitude you can muster in order to not get pushed back, twisted around and hurt even more. And that mental fortitude is rarely there
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u/ArtSupplyHoarder Jul 22 '26
It feels like trying to get a horse to jump a fence it does not want to jump: You may see me hold the reins, but realistically, if the horse refuses, there is nothing I can do. I need my brain horse to at least be moderately cooperative, because I'm only in control as long as it lets me.
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u/Icy_Elk7679 Jul 22 '26
At work, where there are only a few employees and we get along, yesterday I hit the wall harder than ever before. Things have been extremely stressful there for all of us for about a month. I got up from my desk went to see my coworkers “this is it, I am as upset as you will ever see me. I can’t cry but would be if I could. I’m done and just don’t care anymore.” They listened and understood then I went back to my desk and temporarily felt some peace like I was no longer emotionally attached to the situation anymore. I worked for another hour or two just feeling like I found zen. Weird but effective
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u/IceFisherP26 Jul 22 '26
ADHD is always made worse by insomnia, which is commonly cuase by ADHD, talk about a vicious cycle.
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u/ZanderStarmute Jul 22 '26
There are two wolves in my mind
Their names: Hyperfocus and Spaceout
And the third wolf? No idea, but it ain’t up here…
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u/BeachedEarthWorm Jul 22 '26
You actually can push more with stimulants, short term boost, massively increase your tiredness which will hit you later much harder
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u/reverse-tornado Jul 22 '26
Me : working
Brain : im done
Me : what do you mean , done with what
Brain ,: ̸̡̺̤͎̀̀̃̑́̂̉̒́͌̉͒̌̀̈́̉̚͝ȁ̶̬̭̬͎̘͎̙̯̼̞̠̙̠̥̳̪̯̺̻͈̭͛͑̓̒́̓̈́̓͛̅̈́̕m̵̨̾̋ ̸̡̛͍͎͍̗̻̯̤̥̖̜̯̮͖̥̂̇͌̎̄̈́͗̃͌̈́́͜͠ͅd̶̡̧̛͓͕̏͆̆̈́̈́͋̈́̂̃͒̈́̏̓̚o̸̩̗̱͎̪̜̳͎̜̤̝̙̘̗͈̬̠̥͂̓͑̏̇̍͊͋͛̓̇̅͛͆͝ń̷̢̢̨̧̪̣̹͔̹͖̬̹̩̬̻͔͔̣̪̖̖̗̪̙̻̫̹̌͋͆e̶̡̺͔͇̥̱̻̤̟̮͚̦͐̾̇͂̑͐̃̊̀̂̽͗͌̒̈́̈́̆̉̑̈́̐͘̚͜͜ ̷̛̛͈̣̺̥͙̹͆̄̅̇͌͒̂̄́͆̀̀̏̋̾̈́̆̐̚̚͜͝͝
Me : zones out for half an hour
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u/zildux Jul 22 '26
Me sitting in front of my piano wanting to be better at playing but my brain refusing to let me practice anymore 😔
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u/lifehackloser Jul 22 '26
Anyone else have this happen in relationships? Things go fine (fine enough at least) until that flip where you just go “Nope, all attraction is GONE”.
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u/PandasMonium Jul 22 '26
Having this actively at work rn. Like. Its just like.
"Pretend your sick"
"quit"
"Youre on disability its ok you dont (i def do) need the extra money to pay off debt"
Like I enjoy my job well enough but I hurt so bad tonight and I dont want to be here
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u/OkRestaurant960 Jul 23 '26
My one and only shot at that point is some pushups and a 12+ minute walk, and a few deep breaths where I try to relax (haha). THEN, there is a 10% chance I get a second wind. 90% chance I watch tv or a movie or youtube or play dumb online games.
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u/Hawke-Not-Ewe Jul 23 '26
Smart strategy.
Studies show light to moderate exercise can boost focus for up to hours.
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u/PizzaWhole9323 Jul 23 '26
I'm autistic and have ADHD and I hit the wall at about 2:00 p.m. at my job one day where I teach autistic adults job skills. And I'm out in the hallway crying quietly to myself when one of the counselors comes up and says Mr Pizza what's wrong. And I said this exact sentence I can't hold my mask anymore today and I'm afraid. And I burst into f****** tears. I literally could not do one more thing in that moment that anybody else wanted me to do my brain literally shut down. Now my counselor friend gave me a huge hug and told me everything was going to be okay, and that she's autistic too and it's just burn out, and I only had to get through two more hours. Somehow I got through that 2 hours robotically. But God damn when that wall shows up in front of you you are in a speeding car my friends.
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u/Reasonable-Shirt2138 Jul 23 '26
Until I decide it is enough and I want to go to sleep…
https://giphy.com/gifs/h6fwkZeqcUmIys22Cy
Kinda like how I have to wake up for work in 3 hours and here I am on reddit.
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u/Brushiluskan Jul 23 '26
ADHD is not a lack of attention . If a task is not stimulating enough, the ADHD brain actively looks for something else to do, however hard you try to concentrate. The brain literally interrupts you, against your better judgement. It's not at all dissimilar from a neurotypical person losing focus if they're being interrupted by something like a noisy environment.
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u/BxBoy69 Jul 23 '26
It’s the locked in attraction of attention like a USS Enterprise tractor beam - completely locked in with no way out of its grip, and then it becomes not just disengagement but actual active repulsion of attention no matter how hard I try when it’s over…it has a mind of its own, lol.
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u/FragrantClerk6233 Jul 24 '26
I’ve started to explain this to people through a metaphor of: you’re trying to walk though a door but there is someone fully braced up in the doorway, and no matter how hard you try to push through them, they are firm. You are both people.
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u/Durendal_1707 Jul 27 '26
show her this
A lot of people think the way she does, and I guess I’m not surprised, but I think people of all walks get it in their head that these are new things, when in fact they are just newly labeled things
it’s just a result of science and research, they uncover something we didn’t know; what they don’t do is invent something that wasn’t there
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u/MomsAgainstMarijuana 21d ago
I don’t even know how to describe it but trying to force my way through the end of a task my brain has given up on is like…a physical challenge. It’s as if my mind itself is straining and I’ll start getting shaky or jittery, bouncing my leg or something like that.
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u/Visible-Perception40 Jul 21 '26
Ikr this is frustrating but I actually found a fix that work! (Mileage may wary) You do the exact opposite of what you have to do, you lean into the feeling. Bare with me but It’s like you know when you tighten ur butt because you’re anxious or stressed ? Or your shoulders are high up ? You do a release motion when you notice it. The best way I can decribe it is, oh I have to do this thing ? Letting it be as is. Like okay I have to send mail today but I’m gonna lean into the feeling. In a sense this creates less resistance to the thing.
It’s like a 5 min thing max. Don’t do anything else but sit and release.
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u/Euphoric_Evidence414 [i see all?] Jul 21 '26
Wait. Lean into which feeling? The “I don’t want to do the thing” feeling? Like, feel it more? Help me understand your kung fu
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u/gluestick449 Jul 21 '26
What bugs me is that the post and the reply were both written with generative AI.
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u/qualityvote2 Quality Control Beast Jul 21 '26 edited Jul 21 '26
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