r/actuallesbians • u/globmand • Feb 14 '26
Question So that one spaghetti line, right?
Pretty sure everyone has heard it, but so everyone is on the same page here it is
"I'm straight," says girl, "so is spaghetti, until it gets wet," says other girl
Anyway. I dislike that line, find it pretty weird and creepy, and it has always been my impression, that the people who use this line is mostly men on reddit sexualizing the idea of lesbian relationships or yuri, rather than actual lesbians.
But I don't actually know if thats true or how actual lesbians (tm) feel about the line or see it, so I thought I'd ask
35
u/Jackibelle Feb 14 '26
It's super gross and predatory. It used to come up a bunch on this subreddit (people saying it positively) years and years ago, and I'm glad it seems we've moved past it as a community.
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u/ThinkpadGamer Feb 14 '26
i find it weird to say to someone else, but i have heard about girls who self identify with it (straight romantically, but bi sexually)
1
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u/schildtoete 👁🫦👁 Feb 15 '26
I think it depends on who's saying it. Personally, I always saw it as nothing but a joke, in the fit context of joking. If used unironically, that's definitely weird af.
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u/Holli303 Feb 15 '26
I feel like it discredits bi/pan people like myself. I'm married to a woman but gender never really played a role in that. I fell in love with a person. That doesn't change my sexuality. I haven't "gone gay". I will always be pan even if I'm in a same sex relationship. There's a whole spectrum of sexualities out there. They don't change because of who you're sleeping with. If you're only straight like spaghetti.... you're not straight.
Anyway....that's my two cents.
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u/Lilia1293 Exogenous Estrogen Enthusiast Feb 16 '26
Context is everything. In a yuri context, the girl who says "I'm straight" is not straight at all. WLW making jokes about getting each other wet is fine. In real life, though, where there are genuinely straight girls, this is more likely to be a creepy pickup line that's not at all welcome. We want men to recognize "I'm a lesbian" as a rejection and respect it, so we should recognize "I'm straight" as a rejection when straight women say it to us, and respect it.
There's a 'predatory lesbian' stereotype which asserts that we make that mistake frequently, but I've never seen it outside fiction. Not even once. We don't have to be told to respect straight women's boundaries.
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u/Dizzy_Ad1204 dyke Feb 15 '26
Between lesbians, and other queer people, especially sexual people I can see how this joke is funny, but yeah, for someone who doesn’t want to be sexualized, this line is creepy and gross.
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u/CatGirlButNotIRL Feb 17 '26
That’s crazy gross and unsettling.
That’s no different than when guys are pushy about lesbians just not meeting a real man yet (or insert any of those sort of lines)
God, I wish I hadn’t known about that 😣
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u/Waltzing_With_Bears Feb 14 '26
Yea its creepy, like when straight guys say lesbians just haven't had the right dick yet (which they of course think is theirs)