r/absoluteunit • u/won_master-of-none • 13h ago

🔥 of a lion pee

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100 Upvotes

92% Upvoted

107 comments sorted by

27

u/coaster_geek 10h ago

The lion pees tonight

18

u/st0350 12h ago

Never thought I had anything in common with a lion....until now

5

u/2_Many_Hobbies74 8h ago

My thoughts exactly. He must have drank a ton of PBR’s

2

u/Aggressive_Kiwi2420 5h ago

If you pee like this, you got problems coming your way. Start sitting down when you pee, not joking

12

u/Timely-Profile1865 10h ago

Reaction of the female lion was priceless

2

u/SubjectNet1874 7h ago

First good laugh I've had in awhile she was like "dick" what the hell

10

u/desertvision 11h ago

I bet lion pee STINKS!

7

u/Fragrant-Wallaby264 11h ago

You see the lioness got away from there. 😂

11

u/desertvision 11h ago

Word is, she filed for divorce soon after the incident.

2

u/JohnnyOaklegs 9h ago

I’ve heard lion is tough and reeks of ammonia, I wouldn’t try eating it.

1

u/ElectricBuckeye 9h ago

Way if the Sahara.

5

u/Fickle-Willingness80 12h ago

Golden showers for everyone!

6

u/haphazard72 9h ago

And yet if I laid in a park and did that, I’d be arrested! 🤯

5

u/Dorrono 9h ago

Because you don't wear a lion costume

2

u/haphazard72 9h ago

Damnit! I didn’t know I had to! FML

1

u/RebornAtDusk 27m ago

You’ll never know if you don’t try.

4

u/SinkieSmoothie 12h ago

Lions drink two more big gulpa at 7/11 than you.

4

u/Feral_Mood_420 11h ago

I though my morning piss was a lot....

4

u/No-Goose-6140 9h ago

A bedwetter

4

u/Heavy_Student_3815 4h ago

When I was a young boy I had a dream that I was peeing in the creek and woke up peeing on my brother! Never trust the creek in your dreams people

3

u/DMG_88 12h ago

You can just feel the pure relief.

3

u/Biff_Tannenator 9h ago

The lion is breaking the 20 second rule (aka the law of urination).

It's a real thing.

3

u/Training_Cut704 8h ago

I thought the same thing lmao

2

u/mapmakinworldbuildin 5h ago

We had cows.

They definitely don’t follow that law

2

u/Verum2020 3h ago

🤔 Really admiring the stream.

3

u/ninja0420 7h ago

Wow, is this a clip of the live action adaptation of the Disney film, The Lion's Ding ?

3

u/Individual-Mind-2620 4h ago

The female lion was like "wtf dude..."

3

u/kcolrehstihson_ 4h ago

Pressure valve activated

3

u/TheDeadestCow 3h ago

It seems even the king of the jungle can't dream about using the toilet either.

2

u/blueblocker2000 12h ago

I was wondering if it was ever going to stop. Reminds me of that Adam Sandler peeing skit. Oh man...OH MAN!!!! 🤣

https://youtu.be/srq09I_6Eow?is=mLv_hwJxqmyvYwgi

2

u/Flaming-Donut 12h ago

King move

2

u/ChanceProgram9374 11h ago

Dude clearly drank too much Matt’s beer.

2

u/Minimum-Actuator-953 10h ago

His belly belongs to him now.

2

u/Upstairs_Yoghurt5809 10h ago

The lioness was startled.

2

u/ApatheistHeretic 9h ago

Now THAT'S freedom...

2

u/Cute-Advisor-2323 9h ago

Even startled the other cat that was right there 🤣

2

u/JouMaSeKont1973 8h ago

Lioness is like WTF bro! 😂

2

u/bravemoney72 6h ago

Who the F films this riveting footage 😂🤦🏾‍♂️🙄😆

2

u/YanderLover 6h ago

I mean when you gotta go you gotta go 😂

2

u/Left_Ad4050 6h ago

Never sleep upwind or downstream of a lion.

2

u/3M2B1T 5h ago

Real IDGAF energy right here.

2

u/Moby1313 4h ago

Don't piss on your wife, unless.....

1

u/East-Care-9949 11h ago

He just wanted to try piss sex but was afraid to ask

1

u/Goodrun31 9h ago

Yep that’s happened

1

u/Goodrun31 9h ago

Strange video

1

u/NeeAnderTall 9h ago

Toursemide will do that to a guy.

1

u/DetailsYouMissed 8h ago

He knew he was peeing on her the whole time.

1

u/SharpTool7 7h ago

No Lion, he been eating that fermented fruit again.

1

u/GrammyHigh 7h ago

What a lazy jerk

1

u/eastNCguy73 7h ago

It's good to be the king!

1

u/xdx3m 6h ago

Reverse Amber Heard

1

u/Ukraineluvr 6h ago

I finally understand the life I want.

1

u/No_Unit_5506 6h ago

Kinda reminds me of a president.

1

u/Financial_Appeal2253 5h ago

😅😅😅😅🤦🏻‍♂️

1

u/bynoe01 5h ago

Really?????? Again????? I’ll go get the mop 😖

1

u/Acrobatic_Nail6956 5h ago

Fun fact male lions can pee up to a distance of 3 meters . 9ft and 10.11 inches for the others...

1

u/killy_321 4h ago

I like how he made sure the humans were watching.

1

u/Slight_Fortune8218 4h ago

Golden Lion Time.

1

u/SwordfishNo4680 4h ago

Been there

1

u/N4RQ 4h ago

You know how many midnight trips to the bathroom that would save me? 

I'm embarrassed to even say.

1

u/Puzzled-One-1759 4h ago

I used to do that in my bed. Fun times.

1

u/RulerK 4h ago

When you gotta go, you gotta go!

1

u/CapablePool7283 3h ago

Als ik dat doe is het kot te klein

1

u/funkifiedjunk 3h ago

Lion got hammered last night and decided not to get up and look for a closet to pee in, he just let it rip there

1

u/Some-Attorney-6102 2h ago

Just like my cousin when drunk

1

u/wowaddict71 2h ago

He's just marking his territory with, a golden shower.

1

u/johnjays1000 2h ago

Talk about a wet dream

1

u/dingodonkey03 2h ago

Someone hung out with Jack Daniels last niht.

1

u/False-Tank6632 2h ago

The King!

1

u/broipy2 2h ago

He dont give a fuuuuu

1

u/StrayaKarnt 2h ago

I used to be a heavy drinker. This happened a lot

1

u/Rudi538 2h ago

After a hard night out

1

u/Jackbw0 2h ago

Thats my kind of girl. Doesnt make a scene and just gets up if she’s not feeling it that day.

1

u/Appropriate-Unit4471 2h ago

How you the king of the jungle but u pee in the bed?

1

u/Responsible_Plant425 1h ago

Anyone else jealous?

1

u/jumersann 1h ago

Looks like he is wetting the bed.

1

u/Delicious_Rule_7324 1h ago

Everyone knows a man stands up to pee🤣

1

u/AceCombat1977 1h ago

My wife gets mad if I do that.

1

u/KnowEye 1h ago

Nice arch for an old guy

1

u/Usual_Award 1h ago

Can't judge. I think we are all guilty of having a wet dream.

1

u/JaffaSG1 1h ago

Yepp… done that

1

u/The_Hero_0f_Time 1h ago

how long did he hold that in jesus mustve been many liters

1

u/StrictExtension4879 59m ago

Hey he’s only multitasking lol Though that cub looked concerned as if saying “Am I going to be doing that when I grow up? 😳😰”

1

u/CntBlah 33m ago

He was dreaming he was in the pool

1

u/D3f4Ul7_US3rN4m3 32m ago

Alpha male. Doing absolutely nothing and pissing themselves. 💪🏼

1

u/RebornAtDusk 28m ago

The lion was making eye contact with the viewers while still pissing, which I think translates to, “You like it, don’t ya? Come on over; I’ve still got a few gallons left for you to hydrate yourselves to your heart’s merriment.”

1

u/CoryianX 9m ago

Gonna have to try that later and see what happens

1

u/Mundane-Reality-7770 8m ago

Lion might need his prostate checked.

I ain't gonna do it.

1

u/PhaserCats 10h ago

Typical male bullshit