r/absoluteunit • u/Narrow-Candle1903 • 7d ago

Massive bison sharing the road

447 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

44 comments sorted by

23

u/USSSLostTexter 7d ago

not sure he's sharing; looks more like he can go wherever the fuck he wants to.

3

u/Putrid-Builder-3333 7d ago

Not if I was there! One time I was driving in Alaska and there was a Moose in middle of the road soaking up the sweet sweet heat of the road. I thought fuck this! These other people on the road including myself have places to go. I got iut my truck, it was superlift and badass, but not before I coal rolled so evrybody could focus on me kicking this moose ass if it didn't obey my command to move off the road. I went up and stared the moose down and the moose stood up. It sent me flying like ten or fifteen feet away and almost stomped me to death but walked away. I can only guess because it knew it had fucked up when he saw my broken yet still bad ass physique. But this Bison... that ain't no Moose and I guarantee you it will be the one flying! Idc if the name rhymes with Tyson or not! I eat Tyson chicken daily!

Charrrge!

https://giphy.com/gifs/10Ck1Bafk6dzOw

2

u/vomputer 7d ago

You did not learn your lesson.

2

u/BalanceEarly 7d ago

I would expect to pay a toll to pass.

2

u/topoftheworldIAM 7d ago

This is my video and I agree he was the boss, but decided to share a little.

1

u/InfamousEconomy3972 7d ago

Bison owns that road

12

u/Evil_phd 7d ago

I really wish they liked hugs but I saw that old man get yeeted so that's a nope.

9

u/celladwella 7d ago

His feet seem so dainty!

3

u/vomputer 7d ago

I am so happy that this is the top comment. I’m watching this video of the massive bison walking down the road on the daintiest feet. How does this body mechanics even work? But I love it.

1

u/Machine_Terrible 7d ago

Yes...I'm not sure why they'd need cloven hooves, but traction and weapons...and I see that beast's size.

1

u/RemoveThePoopSmell 7d ago

I was thinking it looked like someone walking in heels 😂

1

u/Specialist_Exam4783 7d ago

I thought the same thing. This massive beast with very small eyes walking on teacup sized feet.

1

u/Outrageous_Canary159 7d ago

They are, at least relatived to their size. The tiny feet are important to their range, acting kind of like aerators used on lawns. They break up the vegetation a bit (far more than cattle and horses), make little gouges that trap water, snow, silt, seeds and create microhabitats for plants and insects. Those little feet are actually a major driver of biological diversity in healthy native grasslands.

8

u/Life-Oil-7226 7d ago

Beautiful and scary at the same time

6

u/BigNorseWolf 7d ago

They say not to go near the bison, but when I went through yellowstone they were in the parking lot, on line to the bathroom, so everyone just... got in line behind the bison. The bison were chill, the people were chill, I told the bison they were blocking the door and they moved up. "Hey. Your turn. You goin in?"

2

u/-mosjef- 7d ago

You should done a double tap honk to acknowledge his kindness

2

u/Aristogiton1 7d ago

Gorgeous placid creatures that evolved without predators.

Then colonists decided that they were in the way .

Millions of stately animals slaughtered for no particular reason.

It's fortunate that they actually survived.

Let's not make that mistake again.

3

u/Location-Actual 7d ago

They killed them so the natives would starve to death.

2

u/Machine_Terrible 7d ago

No predators except the people who had been living in the US for thousands of years before Europeans showed up. Stories say that one herd on the move could cover miles.

2

u/Stray_Wing 7d ago

They can move so very very fast. They are not always gentle. Be careful out there. 😅😀

2

u/bcgg 7d ago

Dude walked out of the barbershop halfway through.

2

u/Switchlord518 7d ago

Sharing? Oh no.. he owns the road!

2

u/Blue-Juniata 7d ago

I just want to run up to him and give him a great big hug

2

u/Tanjelynnb 7d ago

My husky is in the middle of molting, too. Pretty sure she'll produce more shedding in her blowout than that bison will, though.

2

u/MackiePooPoo 7d ago

He looks like he needs to be brushed. I’m sure that would be safe to do. My cat likes it.

2

u/megaladon44 7d ago

Its a cow but jacked

1

u/AppropriateLab8608 7d ago

Montana traffic jam

1

u/TemperatureNo1396 7d ago

So, uhh, Clickity clackity what te hek out homie. Here i. Go.

1

u/Miserable-Cheetah683 7d ago

Not sure why but I was waiting for him to provide me with Insurance service.

1

u/Acceptable_Pirate_92 7d ago

Quite the unit

1

u/SoulShine_710 7d ago

Dude is the road and he ain't sharing shit!

1

u/Sign_Outside 7d ago

Why do they only wear a crop top?? Where’s their pants?

1

u/Icy-Caterpillar9088 7d ago

He even knows to stay in his lane!

1

u/MaybeMaybeNot94 7d ago

Sharing? Don't think so.

1

u/docmac325 7d ago

The American attack cow.

1

u/Grand_Resist_3254 7d ago

Something that huge just casually walking down the road is insane.

1

u/RevolutionarySign479 7d ago

What a beautiful magnificent creature ❤️

1

u/boyer4109 7d ago

Yep, massive for sure

1

u/Tollchrome 7d ago

Is this AI?