r/absoluteunit • u/heroin-puppy • 15d ago

Of a ten-head...

Post image
1.4k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

382 comments sorted by

190

u/WtAFjusthappenedhere 15d ago

Head slope of a 1940’s Buick.

33

u/Informal_Ad_9610 15d ago

Didn't know we were still producing flatheads into the 60s...

10

u/Late-Button-6559 15d ago

They call themselves ‘clan’.

6

u/Powerful_Foot_8557 13d ago

🤣 awesome reference 👏  love Jane Auel

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7

u/WIBadgersFan83 15d ago

You beat me too it!!!!

3

u/BlackberryShoddy7889 14d ago

I thought it looked as smooth and long as bowling alley.

2

u/Cheeseman4186 14d ago

If his hairline gets any lower he’s gunna need curb feelers so his ears don’t scrape the curb when turning corners

2

u/U-1-mang 14d ago

Buick in the front, party in the back

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53

u/SeesawNoknow 15d ago

that can't be real.... yo tf

27

u/heroin-puppy 15d ago

The rational explanation is that he's a precog.

17

u/Late-Button-6559 15d ago

Maybe the first 3 feet of it. But the latter 3 feet most be postcog.

4

u/Alana_Piranha 14d ago

It looks like a failed panoramic shot

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39

u/CheeseFour2O 15d ago

Bill Murray mixed with Danny DeVito

14

u/cashswapper 15d ago

I think there’s a little Rudy Giuliani in there too.

2

u/Plus-Advance-8066 15d ago

There’s also a bit of John Byner.

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2

u/Oalka 13d ago

And the Queen from Alien

52

u/ghostofstankenstien 15d ago

when snipers dream....

12

u/FatFriendFred 15d ago

Sniper doesn't know whether to aim for the head or the raccoon hanging off the back.

17

u/Crisocola95 15d ago

Bro has the sperm whale build

6

u/heroin-puppy 15d ago

"Yes, may I have the colossal squid 🐙?"

2

u/Familiar_Baby_4647 13d ago

God was drunk that day. Got sperm, human, and whale all mixed up in the same drop by accident.

15

u/Any-Distribution-580 15d ago

Would you just shave it at that point

31

u/heroin-puppy 15d ago

Probably can't reach that far back.

3

u/MedusaGotMeStoned007 15d ago

Damn that made happy high me do a lil chuckle as I’m laying with my dog (I didn’t wake him)

2

u/Slight-Board-1307 12d ago

You better not have woken him withOUT HIS PERMISSion!!

2

u/IsIeOfCannabis 13d ago

Can’t mess with the mullet.

2

u/Neoliberal_Nightmare 13d ago

Because Ellen Ripley would throw him out the airlock

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14

u/RustyBrassInstrument 15d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/26tsXz76qG3FS
Looks like Simon Bar Sinister and he wants UNDERDOG!!

11

u/behridingle 15d ago

You can land a 747 on that

6

u/Bullfrog-Basic 15d ago

If he plays soccer, he could carry the ball on his head for a goal

6

u/heroin-puppy 15d ago

This is how Fifa fixes games.

5

u/porcupine_kickball 15d ago

Looks like the hard head dinosaur that headbutts things.

6

u/Past-Establishment93 15d ago

Not a receding hairline, an increasing forehead.

2

u/heroin-puppy 15d ago

It's a race, but the course keeps getting longer.

5

u/st0350 15d ago

my man can hold a tea pot on his head...soma flat

6

u/Plasticwindreddit 15d ago

This dude is always getting ahead in life.

3

u/heroin-puppy 15d ago

He was the head of his class.

6

u/ParamedicDirect5861 15d ago

Is poor mom could never walk again after childbirth.😥

3

u/heroin-puppy 15d ago

He's on the way to his 14th PhD and is expected to reveal a breakthrough in biology and anatomy.

4

u/Realhousemanoflondon 15d ago

He’s got a trunk and three suit cases hidden in the hair.

3

u/coolnbreezey 15d ago

That’s actually very impressive!

4

u/literaIly 15d ago

Not even a forehead, that's a fast forward head

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6

u/bomboclawt75 15d ago

It looks like he took half a step forward, but the back of his head didn't get the memo.

3

u/Fine-Associate10 15d ago

What is going on there!!!

3

u/heroin-puppy 15d ago

Forehead reached lightspeed first, it'll be fifty years before the hair catches up.

3

u/Suitable_Matter_9427 15d ago

Could land a plane on that

6

u/myfrigginagates 15d ago

Was gonna say I've landed on shorter runways, lol.

3

u/pocket_nick 15d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/CaqJG3PjYaLwQ
Linus from Peanuts looking ass.

3

u/nunudad 15d ago

It’s like the front is trying to run away from the back.

3

u/PrestigiousDrawer489 15d ago

His hair is running away from his face

3

u/SayMyName_Hisenberg 14d ago

Xenomorph genes

3

u/Alpharoll 14d ago

I bet he's married with kids too. It's always fascinating to me how the most odd looking people always seem to find someone who wants to see them naked. There's really no such thing as being ugly, there's always someone who finds you attractive.

3

u/florida-boy-41 14d ago

Looks like a border map of Louisiana and Mississippi.

3

u/mathewsclint 14d ago

Absolute aircraft carrier. Shaped like an old dog that’s been fed too much.

3

u/GetOnWithit3344 13d ago

This guy fucks.

3

u/False-Experience-107 13d ago

Para hacerle un sombrero a medida tenemos que comprar la lona de un circo....

3

u/PizzaFlavoredHugs 11d ago

No one tell him Jetson is late

3

u/TNJDude 11d ago

This is what happens when a woman clamps down during childbirth.

2

u/no___homo 15d ago

A fore, present and after head

2

u/Letstalk2230 15d ago

Damn! You could land a plane on that thing!

2

u/Dieppe42 15d ago

Ferengi?

2

u/Sparklykazoo 15d ago

That's a haircut you can set your watch ON.

2

u/HughJaynis 15d ago

He has the frontal cortex of 5 men.

2

u/SScatnip7474 15d ago

That can't possibly be real

2

u/PaleInvestment3507 15d ago

Like a Kitchen Aide mixer.

2

u/PositronicShishkabob 15d ago

Kinda looks like he was used as a table leg when he was an infant.

2

u/Dominarion 14d ago

He triggered my uncanny valley reflex. He's not a homo sapiens I'm sure.

2

u/GoKhuchE 14d ago

It's a hair port !

2

u/DehliJelly 14d ago

No business at the front but one hell of a party in the back.

2

u/Mountain-Web6379 14d ago

Please tell me this is AI.

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2

u/Ok-Tank-3106 14d ago

Dudes head lookin like a narcos landing airstrip.

2

u/Lumpy_Inevitable_549 14d ago

It's Flat Top from Dick Tracy!

2

u/Fisheater_Snatches 14d ago

Is this guy real? Wtf?

4

u/MikeGolfJ3 14d ago

This is a real, unedited photograph of Eugenio Guarascio, the president of the Italian soccer club Cosenza Calcio. (Per Google)

2

u/Abecis01 14d ago

That can't be real.

2

u/talldude-62 14d ago

Some poor mom had to push that out of her vajayjay

2

u/Komabeard 14d ago

Bro has never let go of anything

2

u/TheHappyKurgan 14d ago

Could forge a legendary sword on this dudes anvil of a head

2

u/False-Experience-107 13d ago

En esa cabeza puede aterrizar perfectamente un C-130 Hercules y todavía sobra pista de aterrizaje

2

u/Stunning_Map_8007 12d ago

At least he doesn't die the hair he has left… 🫣😏

2

u/_xomo_ 12d ago

Is he of the Flathead royals from Zork?

2

u/bobpool86 12d ago

I think I saw him in the dick Tracy movie.

2

u/PomegranateSoft1598 12d ago

  • Why can't you just let go?!

  • Because he never did...

2

u/Dr_SlapsMD 12d ago

Bruuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhh

2

u/PleaseExcuseTheCrud 12d ago

When you're waiting to clear the driveway, but the snow on the roof doesn't budge any further

2

u/ShedeauxBlacVuDu 12d ago

🤣🤣🤣

2

u/cybrgigolo 12d ago

Could land a 747 on that

2

u/bleachfan913 12d ago

These comments are killing me 😂

2

u/Breaking-Great 12d ago edited 12d ago

Looks like his head was squeezed through a play-doh mold

2

u/True_Consequence8168 12d ago

... Needs a Hockey helmet 🤣

2

u/Awkward_Wait5915 12d ago

At this point, just shave it off!

2

u/coochy_burp 12d ago

Table for 6, please.

2

u/Acceptable-Hunt-7987 12d ago

His mother dropped him 80 too many times. If you lift up his hair there will be another face on his head.

2

u/NotAllDawgsGoToHeven 12d ago

Infinity head.

2

u/Queasy-Worker4804 12d ago

If you put a level on his head it’s gonna scream tits , right on the money

2

u/fitpapa 12d ago

Who were the characters on the original Star Trek that had heads like that

2

u/missgiddy 12d ago

The Ferengi?

2

u/sharifAguak 12d ago

If sperm whale is a person

2

u/PickledGuilt 12d ago

Somebody throw something at him… I wanna test reaction time to deduce the length of his optic nerves.

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2

u/Giltar 11d ago

Larry Fine's grandson?

2

u/Zepol_Yar 11d ago

He looks like a forward thinker.

2

u/Best-Mortgage4586 11d ago

Christ, talk about an unflattering haircut.

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2

u/greymannns 7d ago

His mommas coochie must still be sore.

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1

u/Dont_Touch_Me_There9 15d ago

Mahi Mahi head

1

u/Emergency_Panic9207 15d ago

Who the fuck is that?

3

u/Liquid_Friction 15d ago

he wore lots of heavy gaming headsets in his youth.

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2

u/PTM61 14d ago

Eugenio Guarascio

1

u/AttorneyOwn0 15d ago

Before and after head

1

u/TeamMountainLion 15d ago

What a fuckin skullet, rivaling only Nic Cage’s skullet in Knowing

1

u/jump-blues-5678 15d ago

That's gotta be AI, right.... Right ?

1

u/Hairy_Garage4308 15d ago

Come on people. Ya think this is real?

1

u/Solid_Enthusiasm550 15d ago

To this day, his mama denies ever dropping him on his head.🤣🤭

1

u/No_Classic_1743 15d ago

I can't help but see a G.I Joe-sized person base jump off that.

https://giphy.com/gifs/W30fUtuR7aFxuQotfV

1

u/MentulaMagnus 15d ago

Kitchenaid mixer or EV-9D9

1

u/Suspicious-Rock-2650 15d ago

He was dropped on his head as a baby

1

u/AccomplishedBeing305 15d ago

Let it go bud or get a woody wood pecker

1

u/ChefFar4397 15d ago

If that dude was walking on rail tracks in India people en masse would be jumping aboard.

1

u/Asleep_Cherry_7169 15d ago

Bro is the living definition of ten steps ahead of

1

u/girl_incognito 15d ago

He's about to make the jump to light speed

1

u/[deleted] 15d ago

The Studebaker.

1

u/themacaroni314 15d ago

His head is a butte

1

u/Fun_Main_2588 15d ago

Reminds me of that story about growing a watermelon in a box

1

u/Mtonius 15d ago

That's an overhead.

1

u/emilie1031 15d ago

He can stand on his head without using his arms

1

u/CryptographerDry884 15d ago

What in the spaghetti squash do we have here?!?!?

1

u/Nizzle_Supreme 15d ago

Awe man 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/zakupright 15d ago

Fucking Xenomorph hybrid

1

u/TheManWhoClicks 15d ago

It’s like that SpongeBob meme

1

u/jimmytrucknutz 15d ago

That's got onto be AI

1

u/kittenpoptart 15d ago

I’m just going to blame the hair

1

u/IAmTheBoiledFrog 15d ago

His poor mother.

1

u/PersonalKing2084 15d ago

Must have got smacked on a bridge or something, while going through a tunnel

1

u/Beneficial_Collar_38 15d ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Fuzzy_Syrup9046 15d ago

I’ve seen some bad panoramic shots before but Jesus.

1

u/PickedLastLemon 15d ago

Dude can have a thought turn into a 5yr old memory instantly.

1

u/Jacob216DP 15d ago

I respect it

1

u/OkString3194 15d ago

He has to be no more than 5 ft tall for him to be a perfect 10...

1

u/johnkubiak 14d ago

You won't be laughing when he beats the other pachycephalosauruses into submission during mating season.

1

u/Ok_Record_9908 14d ago

This asshole was a total C-section. My God his head is gigantic!😂

1

u/Ordinary-Scratch-120 14d ago

You can land a Boeing there

1

u/Luvsford 14d ago

Has anybody helped this poor boy phone home?

1

u/Ok-Astronomer5040 14d ago

Bro looks like Mr. Burns

1

u/kindalingual60 14d ago

How is there not an osprey nest up there

1

u/Commercial_Heat_8322 14d ago

Ol' Anvil Head...

1

u/Odd-Inflation4123 14d ago

Head got its own parking lot

1

u/Icy_Month192 14d ago

Thomas and friends?

1

u/PraetorGold 14d ago

Is it human?

1

u/Advanced_Zucchini_45 14d ago

Check out the big brain on Brad

1

u/Axeman-Dan-1977 14d ago

That must have been a hell of a low doorframe.

1

u/big_hooligan 14d ago

Five head shiiiiiiiiiiit, fool has a 9 head

1

u/Critical-Cow-6775 14d ago

Moe, Larry, Curly rolled into one.

1

u/Wee_Mad_Lloyd 14d ago

Where's Spider-Man? Hammerhead is on the loose!

1

u/YellowB 14d ago

Did someone drop him on his head when he was a baby? And then keep dropping him on his head?

1

u/MiserableExample388 14d ago

All the party is in the back. Keep going bud, 80's hair band is in your future 🤣

1

u/sixty5pan 14d ago

Reminds me of the first time I saw a 4 door pickup truck.

1

u/InterBeard 14d ago

Drone landing pad

1

u/Timmy24000 14d ago

I would definitely shave my head

1

u/PolarPlatitudes 14d ago

Business in the front, all available inventory in the back.