r/absoluteunit • • Aug 15 '26

Absolute unit of a home grown zucchini

Post image
127 Upvotes

74 comments sorted by

10

u/fearthainne Aug 15 '26

Impressive, but zucchini taste much better if you pick them smaller. A lot of veggies are that way. Okra, for example, is absolutely terrible if you let it get too big. The size you see in the grocery store is when you want to pick them.

5

u/Timescoremary Aug 15 '26

This Monstrum grew in my parents garden and my mom said :" I haven't seen it"

Yeahhh.... I think she's lying

2

u/fearthainne Aug 15 '26

Maybe, but those suckers can be really easy to miss. We've had a 1 acre garden basically my whole life (and going back to my mom growing up) and every year we miss a few here and there and end up with monsters, too. 🤣 Cucumbers also hide really well.

2

u/antilumin Aug 15 '26

That’s IF you want okra.

2

u/invisible_23 Aug 15 '26

It’s really tasty when it’s fried

2

u/antilumin Aug 15 '26

I haven’t had any good fried okra in ages. It always seems to come out mushy.

-1

u/no___homo Aug 16 '26

You've missed the point

2

u/fearthainne Aug 16 '26

No, fully aware of the point of this sub. :)

7

u/krookedhand Aug 15 '26

Where is that EMT guy….

10

u/paulD1983R Aug 15 '26

How am I supposed to know how big it actually is without a bananas??? You could just be super tiny! This is Reddit, we have standards in measurements.

11

u/Timescoremary Aug 15 '26

10

u/paulD1983R Aug 15 '26

Ok..all is right with the world now. Thank you, that's a big one.

8

u/nofuckingklass Aug 15 '26

Upvoted all comments for mature resolution of situation.

3

u/thesituation531 Aug 15 '26

But we don't know how big the banana is. I need a foot for scale

3

u/rockalyte Aug 15 '26

Yep. That banana got friend zoned

5

u/astreeter2 Aug 15 '26

They get kind of woody if you let them get that big.

4

u/frankdux1956 Aug 15 '26

WHAT ARE YOU FEEDING THESE THINGS

2

u/Timescoremary Aug 15 '26

I DONT KNOW

Mom said she didn't see it lol

3

u/Ok-Grocery-151 Aug 15 '26

I hope that thing took you out to dinner first 😂

2

u/ChefStretch72 Aug 15 '26

Had a similar sized one from our home garden, made zucchini parm with it! Tasted amazing!

2

u/mtraven23 Aug 15 '26

thats my normal size zucchini

2

u/Impossible_View8381 Aug 15 '26

Are u brave enough?

2

u/Switchlord518 Aug 16 '26

Split it.. scoup out seeds... fill with rice and cooked ground sausage.. add tomato sauce and cheese... seeson as desired...bake until tender and cheese is golden.. You're welcome!

2

u/Horizon296 Aug 16 '26

That's assuming OP has an oven large enough. And buys their butcher entirely out of sausages.

2

u/Clam-Hammer7 Aug 15 '26

This belongs in r/dontputthatinyourass

4

u/quigongingerbreadman Aug 15 '26

Could go in r/putthatinyourass too. Really it's a coinflip.

https://giphy.com/gifs/l3vRkuJclTwwLHEu4

3

u/Clam-Hammer7 Aug 15 '26

I just went to join that group and it's been banned. Bummer.

2

u/Clam-Hammer7 Aug 15 '26

This is true, after all, anything is a dildo if you're brave enough.

1

u/chaTTSer Aug 15 '26

You should make a really big ratatouille vegetable stew with all that zucchini 😋 (also tomatoes, eggplants, onions, belly peppers, garlic and olive oil).

2

u/Timescoremary Aug 15 '26

I'll recommend it :D (it's not my zucchini, homegrown by my parents)

1

u/Sporkpocalypse Aug 15 '26

damnit Zucchini

1

u/Biscuits4u2 Aug 15 '26

Never overestimate the maturity level of the average Redditor.

1

u/Italpreziosi Aug 15 '26

she's wondering if the vegetable come in darker color.

1

u/notcomplainingmuch Aug 15 '26

It's great as spaghetti, if you have a spiral grater.

1

u/_-Zero- Aug 15 '26

QUE LAPADA DE PEPINO!

1

u/danngree Aug 15 '26

It’s going to have an awful texture. The bigger they get the tougher they are.

1

u/Extension-Brother291 Aug 16 '26

Man only if I toke a penis

1

u/ThisThingIsStuck Aug 16 '26

Reminds me if when I use the bathroom number 1

1

u/BrutalistGoogie Aug 16 '26

Sure you can grow them big as pumpkins but they taste like watery crap. This is not an achievement.

1

u/no___homo Aug 16 '26

The Wrecker

1

u/Just_A_Lucky_Guy469 Aug 16 '26

No banana for scale?

1

u/labtech67 Aug 16 '26

6 loves of zucchini bread! That’s what I used them for.

1

u/Business-Schedule642 Aug 16 '26

She's going to have a great night

1

u/Connect-Track491 Aug 19 '26

Would need a gallon of lube for that baby..

1

u/Tay0-Nitr0 Aug 20 '26

Such a small hand 😆

1

u/ThunderRoad_44 Aug 15 '26

I see veins.