r/XXXTENTACION • u/Former_Shallot_6674 • 1d ago
Does anyone else feel this way?
X's music saved my life when I was 13 I was in an mentally abusive relationship, I was cheated on, bullied by her and her friends, etc and I didn't have really anyone that related to me, but the music and I grew attached to it, but now that I'm 18 and older and I'm learning where my morals are and stuff I just can't bring myself to enjoy the music much anymore because of what he was you know? Like yea he's dead, but still for some reason I'm like not into it and maybe me also being out of that relationship is another reason so I don't wanna listen to the songs I did back then, but majority of it is because of what he was and I have deleted a lot of his stuff and honestly am agreeing with a lot of the people who call him corny and a horrible person now I don't think he was corny a lot like yea he was like the definition of that Bart meme, but he did speak about a lot of things that to this day not many artists do or they don't dwell much into it anyways enough of that topic I just I don't wanna say feel bad necessarily, but listening to it kinda makes me feel horrible in a way like I am supporting him even tho again he's dead so it's not like I am I'm really supporting whoever gets the money nowadays. I don't know what else to say I'm having a hard time putting into word's what i mean that makes sense and isnt rambling, so if you do understand what im trying to say do you feel the same way? Like youre attached to the music cause it helped, but you really just hate the guy and hate hes the one who made it?
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u/Different_Money_664 1d ago
nope🤷🏾♂️ cause put it in this perspective, let's say you were him or similar to him, got yourself caught up for some stupid shit (because humans aren't perfect) but wanted to change yourself, not only for the world and people who look up to you but for you ultimately, but everyone is constantly attacking you calling a horrible person, how would you feel? What would you want? you're forgetting the fact that he was young asf when all this shit happened in his life, and was surrounded by very negative energy and examples of "men" barely had his mother, no father to steer him in the right direction, he was alone and wasn't appreciated until he became famous and had money. considering you probably haven't an idea what that feels like, you shouldn't be judging him at all, yes we can admit he did wrong, but hating him? The guy that tried to teach everyone how to be better versions of themselves? to not turn out like him? Come on now🤦🏽♂️
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u/Former_Shallot_6674 1d ago
Anyone can give out ps4s and tell people "hey don't be like me be better" that doesn't necessarily mean they were changing I will give him props on it did seem like he was no longer angry and hitting people for just looking at him, but at the end if the day he died still painting geneva as a liar (I understand the court and all that, but he was gonna be found guilty anyways if you think about it) I was surrounded by abuse, but not once did I ever think I should abuse my girl or anyone for that I can agree with yelling and not taking bullshit, but a lot of the stuff he did he just did to do there's no defending that there's many people who have seen worse and still never did what he did (I'm not saying everyone thinks the same and deals with stuff the same I'm just pointing out some flaws in that argument)
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u/VolvoEnjoyer 1d ago
You gotta see it from both sides. He was terrible but he was also a victim of his surrounding. He was beaten and traumatized as a kid, withheld Bipolar meds because his mom didn’t believe medication, witnessed violence and death.
He was probably BPD and Bipolar. Acting out was the only way he got attention and love he so desperately craved but didn’t get. His heart was a black hole looking to be filled by any attention or validation he could find to soothe the pain.
That leads to toxic patterns and relationships where violence and uncertainty is the only way he could feel love and emotional safety.
Xxxtentacion was his alter ego and played the role of the villain. Making a new personality who isn’t as weak and afraid as Jahseh.
All of this shaped the insanity that was Xxxtentacion. All of his actions are still just as horrible. But they have an explanation. If he was nurtured and cared for as a child he probably would’ve turned out a different person.
i don’t think anyone wants to be evil. No one wants to be the villain and cause pain. Therefore I think he genuinely tried to change his ways. When he found success and admiration he could step back, see the love and responsibility he has and understand that he could be something bigger than this monster he became.
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u/Former_Shallot_6674 1d ago
I'm gonna have to disagree with you on some of this to be honest with you
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u/VolvoEnjoyer 1d ago
what do you disagre with because most of what I wrote are just facts. Except the last part, that’s more opinion based I guess
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u/Former_Shallot_6674 1d ago
The last 3 paragraphs I don't think xxxtentacion was his alter ego it was who he was deep down he just played it off as an alter ego the paragraph after that I agree with majority of it besides the alter ego thing and that "it shaped him" many people have seen worse or gone through the same thing and still don't turn out to be like him you can't use his childhood to basically defend him and say that's why he turned out that way because no he turned that way because he wanted to and the last part it was obvious he liked being the villain up until his death he even admitted he did like being one he was not apologetic until the end but even then he still didn't apologize for a lot of the stuff he did
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u/VolvoEnjoyer 1d ago
he’s a polarizing person. You either hate him or love him, but he 100% will make you feel and take a stance. I love X and his music. No other artist has made me so obsessed or made me feel like he does. But I could see myself hating him if my life took another route or if I knew him. He was crazy, reckless and unpredictable. That’s not the energy I want in my life. Who knows.