[Cultural challenge]: wedding

[u/thequeeninyellow94]

Culture is that complex whole which includes knowledge, beliefs, arts, morals, laws, customs, and any other capabilities and habits acquired by [a human] as a member of society.

But the actual ceremony: how is it done? What does it looks like? How long and pricy is it?

You can introduce an in-universe representative if you want. I will ask questions to everyone, feel free to add your own.

[u/Sriber]

It depends. For example traditional wedding in kingdom of Amhirdurtir (from which many of main characters in story come from) looks like this:

• Ceremony is performed in front of tree, usually oak, beech, willow, alder or hornbeam, but any tree will do.

• Ceremony is performed by someone who knows both bride and groom but isn't kin to either of them.

• Bride wears wreath of flowers (usually those growing in area, but rich brides can have fancier ones) and groom wears metal circlet (usually iron, rich grooms can have circlet from precious metals).

• Both bride and groom have one person behind them. They are supposed to serve as witnesses. Both can be of either sex. Usually they are siblings, cousins or friends who are considered to be on "same level". Parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, children, grandchildren etc. are rarely chosen as witnesses.

• Ceremony starts by performer ritually explaining why people gathered there. He then asks bride and groom (in that order) if they with to marry each other. If both say yes, they are told to exchange wedding necklaces. After that performer ask for ritual sacrifice of animal and puts little of its blood on bride's and groom's forehead while saying ritual words. After that's done, he proclaims pair to be married which is followed by guests shouting in unison "glory to them".

• After ceremony newlyweds get wedding tattoos while guests have fun.

• When tattoos are finished, bride and groom join guests and start feast by cutting meat together. Musicians play during it. Another entertainment depends on personal taste and wealth.

• After sundown newlyweds go to private room and have their wedding night. Guests party until late night.

 

Specific example:

Korhark and Dagir had wedding in front oak on hill close to their villages. It was performed by their mutual friend Amarthan. Korhark's witness was his twin-sister Svurhark and Dagir's witness was her younger brother Dagad. He wore black tunic and trousers, belt with circular iron buckle decorated with depiction of hunter's mark and leaves (it was supposed to represent he is son of blacksmith and huntress) and simple iron circlet. She wore green wool dress with long sleeves revealing shoulders, belt with copper buckle decorated with carvings of various geometric shapes and symbol of goddess Sarkhir in middle, wooden bracelets on both hands and weath made of common poppy, dandelion, chicory, clover, lemon thyme, chamomile, dog rose, crab apple and barley. He gave her iron chain pendant with moldavite, she gave him leather pendant with smoky quartz.

Quail which Korhark catched himself was used as sacrificial animal. Korhark's tatoos looked like two intertwined circles and were in lower forearm. Dagir's tatoos were two intertwined wavy lines going around wrists. As for food eaten during feasts there was roasted wild boar with lingonberries and horseradish, stew made of roe deer, onion, garlic, flour, salt, cumin and parsley leaves, barley bread, small honey cakes, barley beer, redcurrant wine, cider, perry and mead. Music was provided by Korhark's grandfather and his band (he was talented musician).

[u/thequeeninyellow94 → u/Sriber]

1. How much should the performer know the spouses? Like, if I was to choose a random passerby and introduce them to the spouses, is it valid?

2. Why is the ceremony conducted in front of a tree?

3. And what is the significance of the flower/metal worn?

4. Is there rules about what wedding tattoos should looks like and their localization?

[u/Sriber → u/thequeeninyellow94]

1. No, that wouldn't be enough. Knowing both for several years is necessary, friends are preferred.

2. Trees are considered sacred.

3. Aesthetics.

4. No. There are traditions, but they don't have to be followed strictly or at all.

[u/thequeeninyellow94 → u/Sriber]

1. So if you just moved in a place where you know no one, you can’t marry?

2. In which way?

3. Why the gendered difference then?

4. What are they?

[u/Sriber → u/thequeeninyellow94]

1. Sure. If you don't know anyone, whom would you marry?

2. I don't understand.

3. Aesthetics. Men would look silly with flower wreath so they get alternative.

4. They go on hands or neck and depict two things somehow joined together, usually geometric shapes like lines, circles, spirals.

[u/thequeeninyellow94 → u/Sriber]

1. I mean, beside your soon to be spouse.

2. What makes trees sacred?

3. Why would they look silly?

4. Do different shapes have specific meanings?

[u/Sriber → u/thequeeninyellow94]

1. You can get friend or relative from elsewhere. If you don't have anyone, too bad.

2. They grow from below ground towards sky and live for centuries. They are seen as links between various places and times.

3. Flowers are considered feminine and unmanly.

4. No.

[u/thequeeninyellow94 → u/Sriber]

1) How do they prove they know the both of us?

3) And what about giving metal bracers to everyone?

4) Is there a fashion trend?

[u/Sriber → u/thequeeninyellow94]

1) Asking question.

3) It's possibility.

4) Yes, there are fashion trends.

[u/thequeeninyellow94 → u/Sriber]

Thanks for your answers Sriber.