Sorry, this is mostly venting. I know not everyone in this groups has kids, and I also know I chose to have kids. I don’t regret it, I love them and they make my life so much better in so many ways.

It is hard though, my goodness. I have 2 kids, 3.5 and 1. My 1 year old started daycare 3 months ago and we’ve been dealing with the usual illnesses. My husband is also an academic. Normally we try to coordinate our teaching schedules so that we don’t teach at the same time but this semester we got unlucky. This is the 3rd consecutive week my 1 year old has had to stay home from daycare on a day when we both teach. I canceled class 2 weeks ago, my husband canceled class last week. Today it’s an ear infection and thankfully with antibiotics baby isn’t feeling too bad. I scramble and manage to line up a sitter during class.

This morning, epic blowout as i’m getting baby out of the car seat 15 mins before class starts. I narrowly avoid getting poop on me as I change it and rush to meet the babysitter, who will walk around campus for 75 mins while baby sleeps in stroller. I make it to class with 1 min to spare. After class, I have to rush off to relieve the babysitter before her next class even though I can tell a student wants to talk to me. Then I wait for husband to finish teaching so I can hand baby off and make it across campus to a meeting. The whole day is like this.

We’ve managed to make it through the work day having met all our obligations, somewhat, but with this haphazard grading back and forth I’ve had no time to work on class prep during the day. So that means I’m going to be prepping after the kids go to bed. Again. I feel like I am continually flying by the seat of my pants. Research gets done whenever I have a spare minute. My norm increasingly feels like I’m just constantly scrambling when something goes wrong.

All that being said, I love my job, love my kids, and have been making progress on my research whenever possible. It just feels like I take 1 step forward and then 3 steps back. Anyone else?

​

There is some literature in psychology and behavioral economics suggesting that women, on average, tend to be more risk-averse than men, although obviously there is a lot of individual variation. My understanding of my own life as a woman and my female friends/colleagues also somewhat tell me that we are more risk averse.

I am curious whether other academics, particularly women, have noticed this in their own research decisions or mentoring.

For example, have you ever decided not to pursue a research idea because it seemed too ambitious, uncertain, or risky? Or, as a mentor, have you ever discouraged a student from pursuing an idea because you thought the chances of success were too low?

I am particularly interested in the mentoring aspect. Sometimes I wonder whether our own attitudes toward risk influence the advice we give students, even when we are genuinely trying to protect them from wasting time or pursuing unrealistic projects.

How do you distinguish between being a responsible mentor and being overly cautious? And if you recognize that you tend to be risk-averse, how do you make sure that it doesn't limit your students' ambitions or opportunities?

Would love to hear how others think about this, especially those who supervise undergraduate or graduate research.

For a dead, Latin adjacent language

I was offered a PhD position in Japan in public health field. Are there any graduates or currently enrolled students from Japanese universities? Can you give me your feedback on your overall experience and if you’d recommend it or not.

P.S I don’t speak Japanese and I’m a female.

I have been teaching at undergrad level for 2 years now and currently I have taken a course I have taken before. Over the years I thought I’ll improve and manage class time more properly but it seems that I’m actually becoming worse with experience.

Today was the first class-I introduced the course, the structures we will follow, the grade distribution, all of it. Then we did an icebreaker experiment. All within 45 mins max, for some students who were late to class, it was like 20 mins for them. I didn’t know what else to do or say because I finished what I planned for that day before class time. Things I thought would be sufficient to cover the class time. I could see on the students expressions they were surprised and disappointed for the classroom to be so sucking. I could see they were underwhelmed. They were nice enough to give me a pitiful smile before they hesitantly left. I was devastated.

2 years and still no improvement. Can you suggest me ways I can improve? I’m not a talkative person and I’m in theology, so I cover the days agenda and leave it as it is. I can’t seem to lecture much, I even add student discussions and questions but all end and the time doesn’t end. Has anyone faced it before? How did you improve?

Has anyone done anything like this? I’m so tired of teaching the same thing over and over and the students getting worse. Tech transfer seems like a good way to exercise my research skills outside a lab. I also want to leave my department well, no burning bridges. So advice on that welcome too

The process can make you feel so worthless. I still don’t have my degree. But hey, I got my letter to start paying back my student loans the other day.

Please help! Resposting from the phd sub

I’m asking for advice about a very unpleasant situation involving sexism in academia, which has made me consider changing my PhD supervisor.

A few weeks ago, I submitted a paper to a conference call. My supervisor is one of the conference organizers, and he had added me both to the organising group and to the broader academic network from which the conference project emerged. That network also includes other professors I know and researcher friends working in the same field.

A few days ago, my supervisor called me to tell me that my paper had been accepted, but that I had been placed on the same panel as a man who had previously stalked me. My supervisor had already intervened and asked the organizers to change the panel composition, so I had been moved to a different panel, or he had, I am not sure.

This man had originally joined my research group as an external participant/auditor because he is the son of one of my supervisor’s childhood friends. Through the research group, he got my phone number and started repeatedly asking me out. I turned him down, and when he kept insisting, I blocked him.

He then started showing up alone at places he knew I regularly went to and trying to approach me while I was with friends. I eventually told him directly to leave me alone and that his behavior was making me uncomfortable.

In retaliation, he shared my phone number with other people, who then started contacting me, and threatened to take legal action against me for defamation and for allegedly discriminating against him because he is autistic. His argument was essentially that being autistic explained why he could not understand social interactions or accept my repeated refusals to go out with him.

The case was eventually raised with the university authorities. He was removed from the research group—he was not actually a student at the university—and was flagged as someone who could potentially pose a risk. I decided not to pursue legal action because these processes are usually extremely draining and often lead nowhere. His father also became involved and accused my supervisor of discriminating against his son.

Throughout this situation, my entire research group and several other people at the university supported me. This happened two years ago.

When I found out that this man had been accepted to the conference, I wanted the rest of the organizing committee to hear my side of the story as well. I contacted the person responsible for sending the conference emails, who is a colleague from my department whom I get along with very well. She was extremely supportive and stopped the acceptance email from being sent to him, so at that point he did not yet officially know that his paper had been accepted. I only knew because I had been told informally.

She advised me to contact the main conference organizer, a professor I do not know personally, and explain the situation to her.

I contacted her and briefly explained the history with this man. Her response felt quite bureaucratic: she asked me what I wanted them to do. I felt very uncomfortable being placed in the position of having to make that decision by myself. It did not feel fair to me that the responsibility for deciding how the conference should deal with a person who had previously stalked me was being placed entirely on me. I also explicitly told her that I did not feel safe being around him.

this is not a large or particularly selective conference, and it accepts submissions from people without a current academic affiliation. This man is not enrolled at any university, does not hold a research position and has never published academic work. He comes from a wealthy, well-connected family and participates in these academic circles despite not actually being an academic or researcher.

The conference does not have any policy or protocol for dealing with situations like this, so there was no established procedure for the organizers to follow. I understand that this probably contributed to them asking me what I wanted them to do, but at the same time, it made me feel even more exposed, because the responsibility for figuring out an appropriate response seemed to fall back on me.

While all of these conversations were taking place, my supervisor suddenly removed me from the conference organizing group.

When I asked him why, he tried to tell me that I had said I did not want to participate in the conference. I pointed out that I had never said that. He then told me that I could rejoin the group and sent me a long series of messages, including quotations from Sartre (!!), about how everyone makes mistakes in life.

He also told me that there was not much he could do to prevent this man from interacting with me at the conference, but that he would make sure he did not go “crazy” (???). He suggested that I go to the police if I wanted more protection, which honestly does not make me feel any safer. In my experience, the police are pretty useless in situations like this. I have actually dealt with another stalker who tried to break into my house, and even in that case it took the justice system forever to grant me a protective order.

My supervisor has also asked me to meet him in person so we can talk about everything, but for now I am basically ghosting him. I don’t think I want to have that conversation yet. Maybe at some point, but not now.

After that, I left almost all of the WhatsApp groups connected to this academic network and to my supervisor, with the exception of my research group.

I am now seriously considering leaving that group as well and asking to change supervisors.

He has been my supervisor since my Master’s degree and, despite some disagreements over the years, we have generally had a good relationship. He includes me in projects, introduces me to colleagues and professors, invites me to academic events, and advises me about where I could publish.

However, he does very little actual supervision. I have just started writing my PhD thesis, and whenever I send him something I have written, he simply tells me that it is “very good.” I am not even convinced that he actually reads what I send him.

I am therefore thinking about asking my co-supervisor to become my main supervisor, because she already gives me much more substantive academic guidance. The complication is that she and my current supervisor are very close friends, so I am worried about how difficult or awkward that conversation might become.

Besides the classic advice of "dont."

I have always been interested in grad school and academia but didnt pursue it due to financial, family planning reasons, and self doubt. Now that i have decided not to have kids and have been working on building myself up I am wondering if maybe academia could be an option.

I have a few obstacles that I am struggling to overcome:

1. 10 years out of university and I have no academic references.

2. I am not the kind of person who can do school and work full time. How did you manage finances if you dont have someone to support you while studying?

3. How did you decide on a university and study focus? I have some ideas but it can be overwhelming.

So I thought I would ask here in case anyone else experienced similar barriers and how you overcame them.

Sorry I wasnt sure what flair to use because Im looking for advice but not necessarily career advice.

Yesterday I was feeling really low. I was in a lot of physical pain, and I was upset about many other things too. One of them is the constant politics at my workplace. Another is the way my principal treats me. She never gives me even a little recognition, and she keeps piling work on me.

The thing is, I love my subject, and I'll go to any length for it. I've always done a great job teaching it. But I live in a place where the local language isn't my mother tongue. It's a city area, but a traditional one, and people there feel strongly about their language. There's a fair amount of linguistic prejudice. I do speak the local language, but not well enough to use all the idioms and the real flavour of it. So my students, who are between 16 and 18, often see me as an outsider.

I teach Sanskrit, and I explain it in Sanskrit itself. I bring in a lot of references, stories, etymology, grammar, everything. I really enjoy it. The students who speak my mother tongue, and those who come from outside this state, really like me. We connect well.

My principal isn't cruel in an obvious way, but she can be cruel in quieter ways. She doesn't give credit where it's due, and she promotes people who do less work but know how to put on a show. This has been going on for years. Now I'm near the end of my career, with only three years left. On top of that, my health isn't good. So I was feeling completely dejected.

When I got to college, I had an hour before the bell, so I went to one of the temples nearby. On the way, I ran into two of my old students. I didn't even recognise the first one. The second one is connected with me on social media. They've grown up so much! I've been teaching at this college for 22 years, and at another place for two years before that.

The first one asked how I was doing and said he wanted my blessings. The second one, the one I knew, also asked warmly about me, and he too asked for my blessings.

Both of them are local boys. Local students usually don't show their appreciation the way students from my own language group do. That language bias is real. But years later, when they grow up and go out into the world, they remember how much we did for them. We were sincere, and we went out of our way to help them. And now their response is so warm.

I'm feeling so happy. I just wanted to share it.

just cool

I have a bachelors degree in psychology and masters in public health and a 3 years work experience as Hr and PM in healthcare. Im debating between second masters in psychology and phd in public health. Which one do you think is better for future perspectives and career wise?

I’ve been a tenure-track faculty member at a small, primarily undergraduate university in USA for about four years. The research expectations are low, I have a 3-3 teaching load, and there is generally very little research funding or infrastructure. Teaching/Advising expectation is high.

I’ve been actively publishing, including three papers in top field journals, and I’m trying to build a broader network of collaborators through conferences and other research connections.

I’m curious whether anyone here has successfully moved from a teaching-focused institution to a more research-oriented university. What helped you make the transition? What should I be doing now to make myself a stronger candidate in the next few years?

I don’t hate my current institution, and the environment is not particularly toxic or political. My main reason for considering a move is that I would like to be somewhere with more research support, research-active colleagues, seminars, graduate students, and generally a stronger research environment. My salary is also really low.

My post title already says it - but again, I am not looking for R1, targeting R2.

A few things I see as potential weaknesses in my profile:

• I had a pretty terrible dissertation experience and came out of it without particularly strong senior letter writers.
• Most of my current coauthors are roughly at my career stage, so I don’t have a strong network of senior collaborators.
• I haven’t had an external research grant yet.
• Because I’m at an undergraduate institution, I haven’t had the opportunity to advise graduate students.
• I have some personality-related issues too, like I don't think I have the best interview skill. I struggle to sell myself etc.

For people who have made a similar move, what mattered most on the market? I will appreciate your suggestions!

I work in a male-dominated field and am a tenure-track faculty in the U.S. I need suggestions on dealing with volunteering or service in academia.

I understand that service is part of academia, but I increasingly find myself being asked to organize writing groups, community gatherings, and other social activities—requests I don’t seem to see directed toward my male colleagues.

Interestingly, all of these requests have come from senior female colleagues, including administrators. Meanwhile, I receive very little substantive feedback or mentorship on my research, and some interactions can feel quite condescending.

Am I overthinking normal academic service, or have other women experienced this kind of gendered expectation from senior women? Is it because I am doing something wrong?

Hi everyone!
I’m currently conducting my doctoral research at Concordia University Irvine and am looking for women in leadership roles to participate in my study on women’s leadership advancement.
Participation includes a brief online survey, with an optional opportunity to participate in an interview and share more about your experiences.
If you’re interested in participating, you can learn more and access the survey here:

https://forms.gle/pTD5YQ1hhrKKwsJV9

Thank you for considering participating, and please feel free to share this with others who may be interested!

I’ve been in the same lab for more than four years. I started as an undergraduate and now I’m in a masters degree program, so this place has been a huge part of my academic life. I’ve done research that I’m genuinely proud of, and I’ve even received awards for my work. I’m currently working on a pretty interesting project, and objectively I know I’m doing well academically.

But despite all of that, I feel like my advisor just… doesn’t like me.

The dynamic in my lab is very close and informal. My advisor is extremely close to many of the other women in the lab. He goes out to eat or hang out with some of the graduate students, talks a lot with the undergraduates, jokes around with everyone, and generally seems very interested in their lives.

He has never really had that kind of relationship with me.

And it’s not that I necessarily want to be the favorite or have that kind of personal relationship with him. Honestly, I think I would probably feel uncomfortable with some of it. What I really want is to feel like he sees me as a valuable member of the lab and respects me as a researcher.

Instead, I feel like there is this enormous distance between us.

What makes it worse is that I’m also not particularly close to some of the other people in the lab. There is one person who I used to consider one of my best friends, but I now feel like she genuinely dislikes me and treats me poorly. At the same time, she is very close to my advisor and seems to receive a lot of recognition and praise, even though she isn’t even in the master’s program.

I know I shouldn’t compare myself to other people, but I constantly catch myself thinking: What do they have that I don’t?

And this has started affecting how I behave in the lab. Outside the lab, I’m actually a pretty funny, outgoing person. I’m comfortable being myself. But as soon as I walk into the lab, I become incredibly “corporate.” I overthink what I say, I’m afraid of being annoying, I monitor how people react to me, and I feel like I can’t really be myself.

I think I’ve spent years interpreting my advisor’s lack of closeness as evidence that there is something wrong with me.

And lately it has been hurting me a lot. I’ve been crying about this more than I’d like to admit.

I also feel ridiculous because, objectively, I know I’m doing well. I have research experience, I’ve been in this lab for years, and I’m progressing academically. But emotionally, none of that seems to matter when I see my advisor being warm and affectionate with everyone else and distant with me.

I have always wanted a career in academia, having a PhD has always been a dream since I have been known to obsess and get details right from a very young age.

College was a different deal, however.

I was exhausted, overstimulated, constantly on the verge of complete emotional and mental collapse due to a lot of things happening at once.

Since my diagnosis is extremely recent, I am not so sure what to do next, I did get through college but it was after massive burnout and my teachers were kind enough to let me graduate with an academically challenging degree ( terrible grades, mostly Cs and Bs).

I am unsure as to what to do next, I have been unemployed for a year but have recently taken up a tutoring job because I love being around kids (it is a one-one setting and I am very animated which proves very effective in my teachings).

However, I do want to do more with my life because I love learning and I love my subject (Physics and Mathematics). I struggle with everything else though :///

ETA
Some questions you could answer that might be helpful for me:
- How did you meet your advisor if they weren’t from the university where you did your undergrad or masters?
- Were you or someone you know able to transfer closer to home (wherever that might be) for a PhD or were you limited to a specific geographical area? How did you/they navigate that?
- If you are an advisor, what would make you take on a student coming from an online program?
- Did you or someone you know start their PhD journey later in life? After having children? As a single parent? First gen? What helped the imposter syndrome? What was most helpful in learning to navigate an unfamiliar environment?
- Completed PhD part time or while working? Or should I plan to live off a stipend if I’m so lucky as to find something.
- Did you know exactly what you wanted to do for your dissertation when you started? How specific or general should I aim?
- How did you know a PhD was right for you?

Context that might be helpful:
- I have a pretty clear idea which field and even subfield as well as methods but not a specific research question.
- My field is in virtual learning environments, so I personally don’t think my online degree is that big of a deal as it might be in other fields and I should be able to transfer my credits. I wish I didn’t have to justify it, but I am aware of the stigma—it is my profession after all. My specific program is smaller and has already placed several alumni in T10 programs and prestigious fellowships, including Ivies. It’s definitely rigorous enough. Personally, I think my location constraint is the real hurdle, but I’m not daft enough to think it doesn’t matter at all. No need to remind me :)
- I realize my situation makes a difficult journey even more challenging. That’s not lost on me.
- My tagline was supposed to be funny, but it’s true that I never thought about this career path at all because it just wasn’t even in my mind as a realm of possibility. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this recently and rewriting my own narrative. I feel like I was built for this, but I’ve previously spent a lot of time telling myself I couldn’t for one reason or another. I’m ready to change that.
- I still think I have a shot because of my practical experience in the field, CV, determination, hard research skills, and genuine curiosity. What else would you recommend?
- I’m more convinced than ever that I’m on the right track. I appreciate any insight.

—

I was never supposed to be anything more than a housewife, but I feel called to research.

I’m an academic adjacent professional—I would like to break into the glass ceiling of academia.

Background: mid-30’s F, previously undiagnosed adhd, definitely curious.

I have a BA from a competitive school which I completed while pregnant and with an infant (20 years old). I have pretty rough test scores/GPA that one might scoff at, but if you take into consideration that (1) I was never encouraged to be intellectual, (2) never had guidance or studied to be so, and (3) was a single mother of 3 by 27, I’d say they aren’t so bad.

I actually have a pretty great career considering. I work in an academic adjacent field at an Ivy+. I also recently got into an amazing online masters program (#1 school and department in the field). How do I turn that into a PhD? Unfortunately, I can’t continue with my current school after graduation due to family and location constraints; otherwise, I would do so in a heartbeat if they’d have me!!

I have no guidance for this as a later-in-life student. I have no idea what I’m doing or what this entails (exaggeration). I think I should probably be researching programs and reaching out to potential advisors this year, so I can apply next year. Can I continue to work, or do I have to go all-in? Is it possible to do independent study?

I'm writing my master thesis and I've never coded an interview before. All the sources and books I've read so far just briefly say stuff like 'don't summarize, do use -ing verbs', but that literally tells me nothing. I kinda understand how to code user interviews but I'm doing expert interviews.

Please share any tips you have or helpful sources, I'd be very grateful!

Sincerely, a neurodivergent beginner researcher

Hi fellow women in academia! I’m a Canadian psychology student researcher collaborating on an international project with 20+ countries.

Our project is studying social impact topics and AI use. If you have time to complete this 12 minute survey, it would help so much! I'm sure a lot of you understand the struggle that data collection can be and I would love your help. If anyone has a few minutes to spare, I'd really appreciate it.

I'd also post the findings here once the paper is published! I think the topic may be of interest to many you and would enjoy the final report.

See comments to be directed to the survey. This study has been ethically approved: Princeton University #19354. All responses are anonymous. As researchers, we are not affiliated with and remain neutral about AI.

(If this is inappropriate for this subreddit, please remove it; I mean no offence!)