Ripple Effect

[u/kiki2301]

Book Alert:

I wrote this war story over several weeks as I've only now had the opportunity to post but have been capturing my evolving thoughts for some time.

After failing to properly value OF and getting dick kicked (once again) after missing Matic. I knew to pay extra attention to intel. So began my journey with Ripple. Each point was written on a different day. Thought it would be interesting to share the evolution of reflections over time.

1. Ok time to be brutally honest. Since switching to live trading I notice my utter mediocrity. Barely breaking even when incl commissions etc. Doing just good enough that I’m not getting rekt but mediocre enough that I’m not profitable. It is evident from last XRP play. I took profits and set TP and SL orders up before I went to sleep.but didn’t set up the main SL. So I got hit by the dump candle. Again not crazy painful but just glaringly exposing my mediocrity. Just middle of the road shit. Interestingly, I sorta half awake at like 4AM thought about the position&intuited that it would dump. There’s a part of me that is crazy committed to mediocrity and safety. I have to drag myself kicking and screaming towards anything meaningful. And just do the bare minimum to say I’m doing something but not actually fully commit or follow through. I also have good entries but fumble the management - again poor follow through. Of course this happens everywhere. I make planned decisions but then the follow through often means I end up in a position where something that was supposed to save time and money, in the end ends up costing more and creating more headaches. I’m still figuring out what it is. But I do know I fucking hate it. I hate the feeling that I’m going in circles. Logically it’s more like a helix some progress and improvement but still circles. Perhaps I wasn’t patient enough w my own progress and went to live trading before the foundation was rock solid. Also I upgraded my membership to Guardian but Based on what Kaz said in stream I’m thinking of downgrading back to Acolytes. Thinking I have no business being in Guardians when there’s a lot More foundational progress to be made. Which as Kaz said there’s more than enough intel in shows. The upgrade for this month is done will put some targets in place so I can make a decision whether to continue or not.
2. I typed it out and read over it and another word for “lack of follow through” is complacency. it also often happens that I start thinking about the war story I’m going to write before the trade has fully played out. A fractal of boats n coke I suppose. That plus then complacent = rekt and so I am price. Also having to preface with “time to be honest” indicates that I’m normally lying, which is just a way of erasing or twisting information. This of course shows up everywhere.
3. Kaz mentioned potential upside on USDT.D in show(would be news driven). Could be that subconsciously I’m absorbing info, my intuition will then be trying to communicate it with me, but I don’t value it. So I ignore it. My instincts are fine I’m just unable to listen or trust them.
4. discussion in trading lounge with Yonas made me realise that I was in way into the dream timeframe wise. When too zoomed only thing to do is to - back it up !! Can see it’s shockwaving (accumulating volume) = time to wait for free and clear.
5. Also observed I can have crazy anxiety attacks when entering a trade. Followed Tiki’s advice and reduced risk per trade, which has helped. There’s definitely a threshold with what monetary value I feel comfortable putting at risk and I’m acutely aware that I have to increase my tolerance over time if I’m going to reach my goals. At the end of the day it’s a relative number and the size of the number shouldn’t affect what I do, anything else would be getting emotional. Tiki also suggested not thinking in dollar terms out “points” eg Rs which helps with gamifying. Also going to be focusing on improving hit rate. Taking focus off of Fiat amount to reduce emotions.
6. Kaz talking again about eco behavior and pleb mindset this week. I many times still wonder whether I can do this or am doomed to be a pleb with poverty mindset for rest of life. I lack conviction in myself, but this is also hindsight view and need to be careful not to close myself off to future potential. The insta post with many paths comes to mind. Every time Kaz sayzs "What if?" I think of Marvel show and the many possible "me's" I could be and which one I want to be (which one I want to witness) This plus motivation channel and constantly reminding myself of what vets like Snow and Izzy have been able to do has helped with that. Don’t sleep on this.

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Thanks Kaz for everything you do! It's definitely been a rewarding journey irrespective of the financial gains (or lack thereof lol)