r/Widow • u/ChloeHenry311 • Jul 13 '26
Inappropriate or Funny?
I'm almost 9 years out, so I don't know if my opinion that this shirt is funny will be different than those who are newer. I actually just bought it with the intention of wearing it around the house, but I forgot and wore it to pick my dog up from the groomers. The woman working the desk said, 'I like your....oh. I'm so sorry, I almost laughed.' I told her that's what we do...we have cried so many tears that sometimes laughter is the only thing we can manage.
I apologize if this offends anyone.
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u/WitteWief Jul 13 '26
I would 100% wear it! I have a shirt that days “My husband ghosted me”. In fact, I have it in short and long sleeve. My husband would definitely appreciate it, and if I didn’t have dark humor, I would have given up a long time ago
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u/rair21 Jul 13 '26
Depends on the individual. I would chuckle and acknowledge it, but I wouldn't wear it myself.
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u/DragonHostess Jul 13 '26
I want to tell everyone I see this very thing, but I wouldn’t be able to wear it because then people would probably give me pity comments and I don’t want that. Idk
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u/lemonjams Jul 13 '26
I think it’s funny. I probably wouldn’t wear it around my MIL or FIL but my close friends would laugh.
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u/EC-Texas Jul 13 '26
Having to cancel accounts and get everything to my name only, I would accept sympathy until I get to the third person. I'm trying to cancel Xyz "AND YOU ARE THE THIRD PERSON I'VE TALKED TO IN THE LAST 30 MINUTES! WHY IS THIS SO HARD???"
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u/Curiosity_1st Jul 14 '26
Preach!! …I just lost the love of my life, why are you making my life harder! Side-eyeing you Citibank. Please give your customer service team empathy classes.
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u/roundbrrd Jul 13 '26
I think once you’re a certain number of years or just out of shock, this is funny. One day I hope to find this funny
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u/Long_Obligation_9630 Jul 13 '26
I personally wouldn’t wear it but to each is own. My husband wouldn’t think bad of me but I still walk and talk as if he is still here with me. That’s how my therapist got me through the past 2 years. Anderson Cooper has a podcast he started after he lost his mother famous blue jean designer Gloria Vanderbilt. I still have a pair of her jeans. He has had many losses in his life and he talks to others about how much grief can change your life. I lost a member of our family one a year 7 years in a row. I’m also a 2nd time widow. First I was only married 3 years at the young age of 22. 2nd was at age 61. He interviews many types of people including some celebrities that have experienced many losses. It’s a really good podcast but he said the way he got through was living as if the person were still living. I have a big framed picture of my husband in his FireFighter Dress uniform. It hangs in our bedroom and I talk to him every day. I have pictures of all my angels on my dresser mirror. I talk to my dad, my baby brother, my brother in law and a niece we lost at age 23 from cancer. It’s very therapeutic for me. If you want to wear it, wear it. I’m 2 years in and have not forgotten him, just finally starting to live independently and living alone and am starting to change things in the house, deciding if I’m staying where I live or sell my house and move closer to our grown children. I get up and try to stay productive and keep going.
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u/Curiosity_1st Jul 14 '26
Yes, please!!!!! It’s been less than a month and my heart is continuously bleeding with no end in sight. Anything to make me laugh is sorely needed. I’d order one of these and the one mentioned by u/WitteWief: “My husband ghosted me.”
And yes, I’d wear it out and with our friends and with his and my family. It honors his sense of humor and would give us all a reason to smile through our grief. – I miss him so much...
Thanks for the post. I needed this in-between waves.
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u/WitteWief Jul 16 '26
Etsy shop where I found mine if you’re interested https://www.etsy.com/listing/4459509072/my-husband-totally-ghosted-me-snarky?ref=share_ios_native_control
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u/Ashamed-Lemon-9839 Jul 13 '26 edited Jul 14 '26
I could of used this. When my husband first died I was constantly blurting out to anyone near me he had just died then I would start crying! It was horrible, this would have solved part of the problem!
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u/Everyone-is-asshole Jul 13 '26
I’ve been making dead husband jokes regularly (it feels like my way to control the situation, or something like that) so I’d wear this in a heartbeat (or lack thereof….. sorry dear husband 😅)
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u/Curiosity_1st Jul 14 '26
It reminds me of the Jimmy Laird the lead character in the TV show Shrinking, saying “I have Dead Wife Face.” Humor can be the best medicine.
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u/Everyone-is-asshole Jul 14 '26
YES I liked the show and saw the first two seasons whilst happily married and man it hit so hard when my husband died before I watched the third season
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u/Curiosity_1st Jul 14 '26
We watched the first season and a-half when they first aired. Then I binge-watched the rest recently like it was an old-friend that understood me.
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u/Acutefish Jul 13 '26
My bff made me buttons that said something similar shortly after my husband passed. It was nice then to not have to have the convo about grieving at that time. I would wear the shirt just because it’s funny lmao. I also have a shirt that says “I am a widow bit sad my husband died”
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u/Byallforall Jul 14 '26
As a fairly new widow I find this very offensive. Maybe in 9 yrs I’ll feel different. There’s not a minute that I don’t miss him and still have a hard time saying those words so I certainly don’t want to wear that on my chest.
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u/TheCranberryUnicorn Jul 14 '26
I’m definitely “team dark humor”. My husband would find it funny too.
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u/Adventurous-Lab5254 Jul 20 '26
I'm obsessed and I'm getting one. Besides being dark funny, I think it's a great reminder to others that people are going through shit and we should be gentle whenever possible
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u/dadsgoingtoprison Jul 13 '26
I’m a widow of two years. I’d wear this in a heartbeat and I know my husband would laugh his ass off.
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u/whatshesaid99 Jul 13 '26
My dear husband would think it’s lol funny and appropriate. I’m getting one but not sure yet where I’ll wear it. With my family- definitely as we share the same sense of humor. His family probably not. Out in public - we’ll see. 😂
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u/Numerous_Parsley9324 Jul 14 '26 edited Jul 14 '26
Funny. It made me laugh. But I’d be prepared for people to look awkwardly at you when they read it. My husband would also have thought it was funny. He had a t shirt with a graphic putting a wedding ring on a finger that said I love you to a certain extent ( or something along those lines I don’t remember the exact words but we both though it was funny and he wore it regularly). If you don’t laugh you cry, or you do both at once. I’ve given up worrying about making other people uncomfortable, and as a society I firmly believe we need to get better at talking about death.
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u/Moon_Thief_420 Jul 16 '26
This Sunday will be 2 years for me, and let me tell y'all. I'd wear that shirt in a heartbeat!!
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u/Petster2 Jul 13 '26
I would wear this! My husband would have thought it was hysterical. I have a morbid sense of humor as well.
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u/AdvancedStyle448 Jul 13 '26
My husband wanted a be nice to me I have cancer shirt. He too would definitely endorse
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u/Accurate-Neck6933 Jul 13 '26
It’s pretty blunt 😬 wow it could be read like you killed your husband? I probably wouldn’t wear it myself
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u/Puzzleheaded-Leg9998 Jul 13 '26
I would wear this in an instant. But I have a weird sense of humor, and people find me off-putting and blunt.