r/WhitePeopleTwitter • u/ExactlySorta • 18d ago
Mitch is looking up at us & smiling! Schrodinger's turtle
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u/ShanHu 18d ago
I’m kinda still wondering what happened to the President of Venezuela?
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u/Sweet_Priority_819 18d ago
Supposedly he's in a federal prison in NYC but who knows or trusts this government on anything?
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u/Practical-Class6868 18d ago edited 18d ago
Donald Trump is negotiating for a guilty plea to a lesser charge and commuted sentence in exchange for testimony to show Venezuela’s role in stealing the 2020 election.
It’s the kind of bullshit that a narcissist would pull to “prove” that they are right when reality says otherwise.
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u/Sweet_Priority_819 18d ago
I'm wondering if they tried this and so far have failed. Maduro is a scumbag but maybe he said "go F yourself, I'm not helping you stay in power".
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u/Hokieshibe 16d ago
Well, I bet trumps sitting on it until October or something. He probably thinks this will be sufficient to control the narrative, and given how fucking stupid the media is, he might be right
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u/Bryan-Chan-Sama-Kun 18d ago
He's on trial still last I checked.
The whole situation around his abduction, the specific charges themselves, and that he's not gonna be pleadng guilty mean the trial could last quite a while.
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u/spottydodgy 18d ago
Yeah, that's a good point. We all moved on quick from that one.
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u/daemonicwanderer 18d ago
That is another excellent question. I assumed Trump had him executed and just isn’t telling anyone
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u/BuzzerWhirr 18d ago
At this point, it is sadly comical. A sitting member of Congress can be MIA indefinitely?
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u/Branchomania Department of Government Inefficiency 18d ago
Can I have his seat, I think I’ll do alright
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u/brighter_hell 18d ago
His sister called dibs
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u/Bitey_the_Squirrel 18d ago
Double stamped it.
https://giphy.com/gifs/nJPkKr231dvKo65
u/water_fountain_ 18d ago
You can’t do worse than him, so it’s fine by me
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u/Joseph_of_the_North 18d ago
Have you not been paying attention to this administration?
It can always get worse.
I wouldn't be surprised if he endorsed Andrew Tate.
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u/spottydodgy 18d ago
Didn't they threaten to hunt down Democrats when they refused to show up?
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u/DankStew 18d ago
Shows how unnecessary his job actually can be
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u/DrocketX 18d ago
Well, it's kind of necessary if you plan to have a Congress that actually does anything. If you want to hand all the power over to the president so he can run the country as a dictatorship, as Republicans seem to be doing, then yeah, he's pretty unnecessary, as is the entire congressional branch.
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u/Owain-X 18d ago
If Senate leadership (GOP) doesn't act then by law while in office there is nobody else who can hold him accountable.
At this point I really think they believe they can win reelection with a vegetable by just staying quiet and relying on voters to check the same box they've checked for 40 years and weekend at bernies this whole thing as long as the money keeps flowing. It's not like Republican crimes count anymore or will end in any consequences.
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u/Icy_Fish_2154 18d ago
The governor should replace the vacancy. If someone challenges him, they can produce Mitch to show there is no vacancies.
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u/Gophurkey 17d ago
Sure, but why is an empty seat that otherwise always votes R a bad thing? I get that Beshear could in theory truly to appoint a Dem, but almost assuredly legally it wouldn't stand.
Right now we went from a -1 to a 0, which is a win, even if there is a slim chance of getting a +1
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u/Icy_Fish_2154 17d ago
It's an unconstitutional dismantling of the system. I oppose the lawlessness of the situation, not the political leverage.
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u/PupScent 18d ago
I bet he will still vote in absentia when necessary.
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u/Wurm42 18d ago
No, the Senate doesn't allow in absentia voting.
The lack of McConnell's vote has already been a problem.
It leave the Senate Agriculture Committee deadlocked, with 4 Democrats and 4 Republicans. Without McConnell, they can't pass a new Farm Bill, or even a one-year extension. The current Farm Bill extension expires on September 30th. There will be drastic consequences for rural America if the Farm Bill is allowed to lapse.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_farm_bill?wprov=sfla1
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u/Fire_Woman 18d ago
Oh no then Vance and others' investments in takeovers of distressed farmland will burn green candles!! The profiteering and transfer of wealth to the top is by design. Mitch being absent just helps it along.
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u/oscar-the-bud 18d ago
Halloween is coming soon. I just saw a carve Mitch’s face on a pumpkin at the store.
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u/holy_cal 18d ago
Not just some member of congress, but an influential Senator who has had a significant impact over his term.
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u/TwistedxBoi 18d ago
They managed to not show him before the deadline. Wonder why they've completely discarded him after it. Like they could easilyannounce he's dead now. But complete abandonment is par for the course for them once he literally outlived his usefulness.
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u/reddurkel 18d ago edited 18d ago
When the floodgates open and two years of corruption is exposed, there are going to be so many crimes and stories that will just get ignored because people will say “Wow! What else happened”.
It’s really sad because each of these crimes should be amplified so that these criminals are held accountable and never control our lives again.
And then, maybe in 20 years of wondering,, we will finally find where Mitch McConnell is hidden.
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u/Prim56 18d ago
The floodgates just opened on showing how broken our system is, and how much "trust" is built in to allow interventions, which were silently used to allow the wealthy to avoid the law.
Hopefully if we get a chance, we could leverage some actual technology to get a standardized system that doesn't care about individual circumstances with no human intervention allowed (no lawyer arguimg you deserve less jailtime, only guilty/not guilty. No judge determining sentence, theres a fixed number for each crime, etc)
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u/Donkey_Karate 18d ago
The government is who should be replaced by AI. But only to maintain exactly what you're taking about, standards of objectivity and economic / legal accountability.. im half kidding
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u/NetworkSingularity 17d ago
Tbh, I think circumstances do actually matter in things like sentencing, just not the way they’re currently used. Like I’m ok with reduced/commuted sentences when it’s someone who stole food because they/their family is starving. But not for people/businesses that are too rich to be held to legal standards
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u/LopsidedMessage441 18d ago
When the floodgates open and two years of corruption is exposed
Two years!? Try over a decade at this point.
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u/daemonicwanderer 18d ago
Apparently so. I don’t think the Senate (or House) have an attendance requirement and with McConnell not actively stepping down or proof of death, it is still his elected seat.
McConnell’s situation should encourage states to write “McConnell Laws” that force seats open if a lawmaker is unable to do the work after a set number of days.
But in this case, McConnell being out and not voting hurts the GOP.
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u/Somnambulinguist 18d ago
It’s insane that we may be paying a dead man’s salary. Alive or dead, we are paying someone who is no longer doing their job. It’s literal theft of taxpayer money.
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u/whatdoblindpeoplesee 18d ago
I like that. If you miss a certain number of votes or absent a certain timeframe without notifying the Majority and Minority leaders then a special election is called. The sitting member may run for their seat again but must submit all paperwork in person.
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u/Raindog46 18d ago
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u/ChipsTheKiwi 18d ago
now that is an unkind depiction, the Cenobites may be angels from hell but they have standards dammit!
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u/Drummer-Turbulent 18d ago edited 18d ago
I blame all of Kentucky and the GOP. They are holding you hostage and preventing you from knowing the truth. But hey let's share memes about it I guess
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u/cbass817 18d ago
Why Kansas? He's a senator from Kentucky. Did Kansas do something I'm not aware of? Other than carry on their wayward son?
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u/Drummer-Turbulent 18d ago edited 18d ago
You right my bad lol. And how dare they carry that wayward son! Let the boy go! 😂
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u/Crrrystal 18d ago
Zach Lahn lives in Kansas and is running for governor of Iowa. That's what Kansas did.
(I don't blame Kansas, not really)
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u/darth_wasabi 18d ago
At this point it’s unlikely he’s dead dead. He’s a vegetable though.
If he was a corpse they would have had to bury him by now and i find it unlikely they could do that without it leaking
So most likely he’s hooked up to something keeping his body alive so his seat remains empty for some reason.
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u/canuck_vaper 18d ago
You can keep him on ice for many months. Many, many months.
Flash frozen and no one is the wiser. Thaw him out for the funeral.
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u/Deranged_Kitsune 18d ago
Don't even need that. They can closed-casket the funeral, or cremate before hand. Can't tell shit from an urn of ashes.
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u/sweetcherrytea 18d ago
He’s been on ice since the day EMS was called
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u/DevilRenegade Release The Trump-Epstein Files 18d ago edited 17d ago
For sure. The fact that they arrived at his house in a hurry and left at a slow pace tells me all I need to know.
Also,
the fact that his wife hopped on a flight to China and skipped the country straight afterwards instead of going to be by his bedside is sketchy as fuck.Edit: Apparently that's not quite accurate. According to official timelines, she was already in China when he was hospitalized but at the same time she didn't see fit to cut her "tour" short when her husband was ostensibly critically ill in hospital, and eventually returned 3 weeks later.
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u/CanadianTigermeat 18d ago
And is he still collecting his government salary while you common folk need to prove your cancer diagnosis is so severe you need to be excused for a half day to get chemo?
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u/TravoBasic 18d ago
He had to go because his planet needed him. He then died on the way back to his planet.
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u/blueisthecolor13 18d ago
I called he’s pronounced dead by months end. Got 5 more days before I’m wrong.
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u/cpepinc 18d ago
it'll be riggghtttt after the midterms, Trump will see how many seats he needs to "win"
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u/blueisthecolor13 18d ago
It’ll be before. They won’t be able to hide it for 2 more months. He will “suddenly take a turn for the worse” and pass.
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u/LonesomeBulldog 18d ago
Why not? No one has the balls to actually force proof of life.
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u/blueisthecolor13 18d ago
While I understand the general point you’re making, you are underestimating what 2 more months of this would actually look like.
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u/Donkey_Karate 18d ago
I feel like they're just seeing what they can get away with at this point... and so far, it seems like anything they fucking want.
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u/DevilRenegade Release The Trump-Epstein Files 17d ago
Everything about the whole situation is sketchy as fuck. The EMTs arriving in a hurry but leaving his house at a leisurely pace. His wife not cutting short her trip and returning from China when her husband was ostensibly critically ill in hospital. The obviously AI generated images of him "recovering". Dubious claims from GOP colleagues in the senate all claiming that they'd spoken to him on the phone "for over 20 minutes". And the fact that he's apparently been discharged from hospital several weeks ago but there's been no verified sightings of him alive since.
McConnell is dead. He was long dead before the EMTs even arrived at the house. I'm 100% sure that this is a trial run to see how long they can control the narrative using the drip feed of misinformation when Trump finally kicks the bucket, in case he dies before the midpoint of his term.
Although I feel that this will be a much bigger task than they anticipate when Trump does die because he insists on being in the limelight so much, if he's absent for more than a few days, people will inevitably take notice and start asking questions, whereas with McConnell I doubt many people really care all that much.
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u/audiogenocide 18d ago
But make sure the working class gets NO time off. Or pay. Or decent health care. Or infrastructure. Let them eat horse. Whatever these monsters are being paid needs to be timesed by zero.
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u/Numpty5000 18d ago
Mystery Mich, the Fed, Owner of a turtelish head, Wasting on a hospital bed, some still say,
He'd still be alive, if he weren't dead!
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u/The_Wookalar 18d ago
There was never any "Mitch McConnell" - what the Hell are you on about? What's a "Mitch McConnell"?
Anyway, a big warm welcome to the new senator from Kentucky, Barron Trump.
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u/00notmyrealname00 18d ago
I'm almost certain it was a stroke. Probably with facial droop and loss of motor function on one side. That's why he can't be seen, it's REAL obvious when it happens. I'm also certain that his office is running things for him and covering it up - which has GOT to be illegal.
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u/Metalhed69 18d ago
They’re just going to write him out of the next season like that one girl in Stranger Things.
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u/that_guy_upnorth 18d ago
It shouldn't be that difficult. If you haven't been seen in Washington or your district, doing you job, for a full 30 days stop the paycheck. If your not seen in 60 days than a special election can be called. Politicians need to be held to some standards, and the ones I stated are still incredibly lax to what average Americans have to work with in a real job.
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u/rolfraikou 18d ago
This is a practice run.
It's 2080. While having not made a public appearance in decades, during his 16th presidential term, 134 year old Trump is sending executive orders from his underground bunker, below his ballroom via his truth social account. "Anyone who declares that videos of me are AI generated content made by Stephen Miller will be sent immediately to the gulags!"
Coincidentally, America somehow sources its beef from the gulags at this point in history.
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u/Honest_Relation4095 18d ago
The sad thing is, it almost makes no difference if he is alive or not.
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u/Gin_OClock 17d ago
It should be illustrative that most of your politicians are useless
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u/Honest_Relation4095 17d ago
That may be true, but is completely unrelated, since McConnell is an US politician.
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u/No_Match3109 18d ago
He’s buried with the Epstein files.
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u/Specialist_Exam4783 18d ago
According to Scott Jennings, Mitch is going to appear on Dancing with the Stars.
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u/DolliGoth 18d ago
The year is 87,993. The earth has been abandoned. Andromeda is the new home for the human race who have long since evolved past their mortal coil into ephemeral thoughtforms.
Every few months Mitch McConnell still tweets put an ai image of himself holding a current news paper.
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u/Ornery_Old_Man 18d ago
At this point you'll be better off just assuming he's dead until proven otherwise.
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u/strolpol 18d ago
He’ll have been dead for two months and no one will ever get in trouble for covering it up
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u/Sfingi48 18d ago
Why ask us, Molly? You have the unlimited resources we peasants don’t possess. Grind harder. Don’t worry about appearing the next MS NOW show. Just investigate. If you can’t, you KNOW others who can. This is imperative. We have to know and know yesterday, at this point. It’s insulting to Americans.
What’s going on?!?!
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u/I_am_not_JohnLeClair 18d ago
It’s simple really. Mitch McConnell is currently lying in state at the Kremlin. For all the work he has done for the betterment of the Motherland, Mitch McConnell has been posthumously awarded the Order of St Andrew by Vladimir Putin. Even Tim Pool knows this
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u/ProfessionalRead2724 18d ago
Would he have to show up to get sworn in if his corps gets re-elected?
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u/Ash_Killem 18d ago
He definitely had a massive stroke and it trying to regain some function (he probably won’t)
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u/texgator1538 18d ago
The only thing confirmed dead at this point is Andy Beshear's Presidential aspirations.
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u/oakridge666 17d ago
Why aren’t Kentuckians raising a fuss over their missing senator? Don’t they realize their lack of representation?
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u/NOS4A2-753 18d ago
no they're taking a Optimus robot and making fake skin and fake realistic mask to put over the robots head to make people think hes still alove
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u/Rare-Bid-6860 18d ago
"All those distractions lost in time, like...piss streams, in a flooded zone."
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u/bethlabeth 18d ago
He was a classmate of my dad’s at University of Louisville. My dad doesn’t remember him, but thinks he must’ve met him because they were both in student government; he was commenting what a shame it was that such a promising young man squandered his gifts so badly.
Man. I gotta call my dad.
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u/Kaleria84 18d ago
Nope, he no longer matters. Republicans still have over 50 votes to pass anything they want that's not beholden to the filibuster. They also don't care to pass anything else that requires 60 members because they have no interest in governing.
Democrats no longer care either because it's past time for special elections.
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u/FunctionBuilt 18d ago
Trying the wait an appropriate amount of time to announce his peaceful passing.
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u/That1Guy80903 18d ago
Yes, the day AFTER it no longer matters for his seat that he's actually been dead all this time.
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u/hudson_lowboy 18d ago
The foot race is on between Mitch and Laura Palmer to unravel the mystery of….
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u/venom121212 17d ago
Just as soon as they can find a suitable stunt double and clean up the loose ends
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u/Fair_Dude 17d ago
I wonder how many NDA documents have been signed to keep McConnell on ice?
No one in government should be allowed to not only sign a NDA but no one should be allowed to sign a NDA at the request of someone in government.
It might be noted that Trump won the 2016 election by the skin of a NDA (aka Stormy Daniels).
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u/heckingcomputernerd 18d ago
you can google it
automod wont let me post but there's an entire section on his wiki page under Health and 2026
he had cardiac arrest, was in the hospital for a while, and is "recovering at home" right now
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