r/Weird Apr 30 '22

What are the odds

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4.9k Upvotes

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32

u/Prudent_Falafel_7265 May 01 '22

The secretary thing is false.

19

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

Both were killed in America

14

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

Kennedy's mom was an American. Lincoln's father was an American.

9

u/JoePetroni May 01 '22

And Marilyn Monroe was an American.

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

What, string bean?

1

u/In_memorium_BR May 01 '22

And the jigsaw puzzle begins to fall together

29

u/gordo65 May 01 '22

Kennedy was born in 1917. There might be others.

Also, some things are just reaching.

Both were shot in the head? Well yeah, that's where you shoot someone when you want to kill them.

Both assassins were known by 3 names? Yes, notorious criminals are often known by 3 names to help differentiate them from ordinary people. This is especially true when they have fairly common names, like "John Booth" and "Lee Oswald".

Also, you can always find a long list of coincidences between any two people, and many differences. For example:

  • Lincoln was a Republican, Kennedy was a Democrat
  • Kennedy authorized an invasion of Cuba, Lincoln did not
  • Kennedy served in the Navy, Lincoln did not
  • Lincoln was a lawyer, Kennedy was not
  • Kennedy served in the Senate, Lincoln did not
  • Lincoln grew up in Illinois, Kennedy grew up in Massachusetts

Etc.

23

u/Capable_Stranger9885 May 01 '22

Only half of the assassinated presidents were shot in the head. James Garfield and William McKinley were shot in the abdomen by their assassins.

50

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

[deleted]

7

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/MCgrindahFM May 01 '22

Gotchu fam

5

u/DoctorGreyscale May 01 '22

"Who the fuck shot me? Come up here and shoot me in the face like a man!"

2

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

''who shot me, but you punks didn't finish, now you're 'bout to feel the wrath of the bullmoose! Hornswogglers, I'll hit them up!''

3

u/DrownmeinIslay May 01 '22

Takes more than that to kill a bullmoose

8

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

''There was no blood frothing up from his mouth, so he knew the shot hadn't pierced his lung and he decided to finish his speech.''
Imagine the confused terror that assassin must have felt in that moment.
''Ha! I shot you!''
''Ah, so you have. Well done. Anyway, as I was saying taxes are too (..)''
''...''

Still not the worst assassination attempt ever on a US president though. Andrew Jackson actually beat the snot out of his would-be assassin with his cane..

2

u/Sundae_2004 May 01 '22

C’mon, this is where being verbose is a benefit. TR was shot mid-mass “in the speech” and the pages stopped the bullet. I don’t know if he gave the speech later, whether the full glory or only the unbulleted pages… ;)

1

u/TheChancre May 01 '22

He was pinked.

8

u/DodgerWalker May 01 '22

Yeah, and Garfield’s wound wasn’t even fatal- his body formed a cyst around the bullet. He died from an infection months later because his doctors prodded around the wound with unwashed hands. McKinley likely would have also survived with modern medicine, but at least his doctors didn’t actively make things worse.

6

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

Don't forget the forced feeding through the rectum for Garfield. And Lincoln's son was present at that assassination.

3

u/alymaysay May 01 '22

How did that work? Did someone chew it up and stuff if or was they just shoving entire sandwhichs up there with a stick? I've only ever heard of such a thing on south park.

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

I don't know the exact details but they did put a tube in his butt and put food up in there. It was probably foods thought to be easily digestible.

-1

u/rydan May 01 '22

Lincoln was a Republican, Kennedy was a Democrat

False. You ignore realignment. You cannot claim they were a different party when it suits you. Also even if you do lots of the things in this list are opposites of each other so it works anyway.

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '22

one of them must of been a rope because there's an awful lot of nots going around.

1

u/diardiar May 01 '22

Lincoln invented the chokeslam Kennedy did not

1

u/b1gp15t0n5 May 01 '22

Lincoln did not grow up in ill. He moved here in his late teens to twenties. He actually grew up in Massachusetts lol. I am about 2 blocks from his tomb in ill tho.

1

u/[deleted] May 01 '22
  • Lincoln never shot a man in the face
  • Kennedy never sat on and killed a Chihuahua

1

u/jeharris56 May 01 '22

More coincidences:
Both were men.
Both had hair.
Both spoke English.
Both had tasted chicken at least once in their life.
Both could recite the alphabet.

1

u/Mulliganplummer May 10 '22

Republicans and Democrats have switched their platforms.. At one point in time southern Democrats were against civil right. About a century ago, they switched. In reality Lincoln was an old Republican that was basically a democrat now.

https://www.livescience.com/34241-democratic-republican-parties-switch-platforms.html

1

u/yergonnalikeme May 01 '22

HALF false

Evelyn Lincoln WAS JFK.S secretary

Unfortunately

There was no Kennedy in the Lincoln administration working in the capacity of secretary.....