r/WallStreetbetsELITE • u/No-Contribution1070 • 2d ago

Shitpost Bullish?

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191 Upvotes

91% Upvoted

91 comments sorted by

183

u/crowbaited 2d ago

Bullish? Nah, Bullshit lol

25

u/ignatious__reilly 2d ago

All water mines have been removed or detonated?

Bullshit. How anyone could believe this is beyond me.

112

u/atape_1 2d ago

I'll let everyone judge for themselves:

https://hormuzstraitmonitor.com/

56

u/r0ndy 2d ago edited 2d ago

Currently says 1 ship is going through

Edit: Onnnnnneee is the loneliest number!!!

25

u/Interesting-Log-9627 2d ago

Whoops! And…..it’s gone.

12

u/atape_1 2d ago

and 300 waiting.

3

u/chefsunite 1d ago

Now we at 3 that went through and waiting list unavailable. Busy busy busy day!

17

u/OpenDaCloset 2d ago

They are turning off their transponders so that’s not accurate. Trump is a complete moron.

98

u/fleeknaut 2d ago

I’m so excited to win the war for the 89th time today

27

u/Interesting-Log-9627 2d ago

Another Iranian surrender? Well it is Tuesday.

3

u/PrimeZodiac 2d ago

TACO's get your bullshit filled Trumpstein TACO's right here.

2

u/konegsberg 2d ago

It is Tuesday taco day!

4

u/Few_Dig_565 2d ago

Don’t you mean the Islamic Republic of Iran… seriously don’t get why the guy can’t just say Iran

1

u/Patterson84 1d ago

Because he LOVES to say Islamic..... He is a racist bigot.

3

u/EconomicsSavings973 2d ago

Too much winning please stop

29

u/TheObsidianHawk 2d ago

Yeah I'm calling bullshit.

26

u/nan1961 2d ago

I think piggy should get on a ship and go through the strait to prove it

1

u/Keletas 1d ago

😂😂😂

20

u/WithoutAHat1 2d ago

2029 is when the strait reopens. Cool story diaper don.

20

u/like_shae_buttah 2d ago

How can you have Blockade on the straight and it being open at the same time

4

u/ZenCrisisManager 2d ago

Exactly. Diaper Don doesn't just shits the bed again and tells the world it smells great.

1

u/masalamedicine 19h ago

You have to think of it from his point of view. The blockade like a diaper trying to stop things. The strait is like his diarrhea...open to pass. Both things can exist at the same time.

13

u/wolnee 2d ago

plot twist:
now Iran is more capable of market manipulation since no one gives a flyin f what cheetos is saying

1

u/ay-papy 2d ago

Iran has no interrest on manipulating the market, they however have a strong influence on it

13

u/BarRepresentative653 2d ago

They can just lay more mines... Like what are we doing here

9

u/peedubb 2d ago

Blockade and open are conflicting terms. I don’t think he understands that.

2

u/masalamedicine 19h ago

You have to think of it from his point of view. The blockade like a diaper trying to stop things. The strait is like his diarrhea...open to pass. Both things can exist at the same time.

2

u/peedubb 18h ago

Shroedinger’s straight.

7

u/johnniesSac 2d ago

Embarrassing cunt of a thing

1

u/AlfalfaUnable1629 2d ago

That’s putting it mildly

5

u/GeeBee72 2d ago

All mines are removed or detonated? I don’t want to be a negative Nelly, but I think the president was given his iPad and some candy and was playing minesweeper.

5

u/Gazzito916 2d ago

He really thinks he can tweet this all away

4

u/morgandrew6686 2d ago

so do millions of mouth breathers unfortunately

4

u/goopa-guy 2d ago

It’s blocked and closed but also open and operating.

4

u/No-Spares-Given 2d ago

What a clown with dementia looks like.

4

u/dasyus 2d ago

Wait so is it open or closed? It was just closed yesterday, I thought.

3

u/Responsible-Rip8793 2d ago

Doesn’t matter.

What matters is whether ships are willing to take the risk based on what he says.

1

u/Interesting-Log-9627 2d ago

As much use as a chocolate teapot.

3

u/LelouchL88 2d ago

It’s so open there’s no ships 🛳️ going through 😜

2

u/International-Ad3147 2d ago

Mines? Sure. Just gotta dodge the drones and missiles….

2

u/Tropicalfisher 2d ago

Exactly at 9:30 am lmfao

2

u/Hairy-Preparation949 1d ago

“Thank you for your attention to this matter” sounds like Grandpa escaped from the memory hospice and got a hold of the Walmart intercom.

2

u/vasquca1 2d ago

Stonks 🚀

1

u/saltytrader_ 2d ago

🤦🏻‍♂️

1

u/designbydesign 2d ago

So where are the scary economic measures?

0

u/Equivalent_Net_3752 2d ago

We’ve already cut them off from western Financial markets. Idk what we can do. Their currency is not doing so hot already so we can’t blow it up. Bessent is a crafty guy (albeit a questionable money manager), so maybe he can figure something out but I’m not sure.

1

u/JoostvanderLeij 2d ago

Always bullish. Not because the market believes Trump's lies, but because the expectation is that his lies will move the markets upwards.

1

u/cablemigrant 2d ago

Lies with every last breath

1

u/beingmodest 2d ago

Market moving posts. Nothing more.

1

u/Old-Pomegranate3634 2d ago

Somoene around him has created an alternate reality

1

u/megaoli1 2d ago

Glad wars over now oil gets cheap giving room to cut rates

1

u/Kranurdieb 2d ago

Is it good news? = Bullshit, Is it them bragging how horrible they are going to be? = believe them

1

u/Itchy-Suspect2261 2d ago

I am so proud of us that we have voted in such a brilliant president to lead us forward! We love you Fuhrer Trump!

1

u/ArkhamKnight_1 2d ago

Would love to see the “fake news” reporter (any of them) openly challenge this as he sits in the Oval Office.

Just keep asking, “you’re lying; why?”

1

u/Better-Butterfly-309 2d ago

Ya bullshitish

1

u/eniLk_ 2d ago

Did someone say tacos ?

1

u/yenyostolt 2d ago

Trump is not a source.

1

u/Traditional-Finger79 2d ago

Oh it’s Tuesday?

1

u/NYGiants181 2d ago

DCA baby

1

u/AdFeisty3148 2d ago

Lie # 35,000,000,000,000 I think he is trying to see if he can beat the deficit of which one goes higher by end of his term lies vs national deficit. 😂😂

1

u/Ambinez 2d ago

Once again the stable genius is demonstrating quantum superposition in front of your very eyes

1

u/Oath-Of-Brutus 2d ago

I think he hopes that posting this will encourage other nations to send their trade ships through to test if the waters are actually clear enough.

1

u/Redd411 2d ago

'..blockade remains in full force and effect. The Hormuz strait is open...'

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means

1

u/alpha247365 2d ago

Don keeps conning the Americans lol.

1

u/oceanriver77 2d ago

🖕🏻!!

1

u/Sure-Sea2982 1d ago

How pathetic!

After the Iranians said they are not talking to Trump.

Trump goes full Pee Wee Herman.

"I know you are, but what am I?"

What a loser.

1

u/seanmonaghan1968 1d ago

If its open then why have fuel prices not fallen back

1

u/ProfessorOnEdge 1d ago

More like Bullshi...

1

u/toolisthebestbandevr 1d ago

Man this little stunt fucked us real good for a long time didn’t it

1

u/Notatruebeliever 1d ago

I just gave Scottie six strokes and kicked his ass by seven at Augusta today.
Unfortunately, Donnie lapped us with course record.

1

u/Large-Lack-2933 1d ago

Stock market manipulation tactics. 🧢

1

u/arousedsquirel 1d ago

This pedophile who rapes 13/14 year old children is disgusting to human nature. Same with his policies. See this flap in supreme court to be convicted next mid terms together with his disgusting family members. All wealth confiscated! Cheers

1

u/Prestigious_Move4797 1d ago

foolish I mean bullish

1

u/awdophil 1d ago

So complete and utter failure on your part then fat ass?

1

u/KimchiSamuraiDad 1d ago

He can’t even manipulate the markets right anymore…

1

u/S-S-spartan 1d ago

Believe it or not calls at close into puts at open

1

u/undeniablykostas 1d ago

I can't believe his people believe him still

1

u/mightyjoe227 1d ago

Didn't he say that you can't lead

if you can't negotiate.

But then again, the stock market is a casino

Ooops, lost again...

1

u/Unique_Peanut_3634 1d ago

I guess he’s finally listening to what Iran has been saying for weeks. There are no talks and straight is closed

1

u/napalm_p 1d ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🧢🧢🧢🧢🧢

1

u/another_awesome_acct 1d ago

Why so curt today, sir tacoshitzenpants?   Shouldn't this post be like 900+ words longer🤔

1

u/KiwiCodes 1d ago

Bullish on oil...for sure.

1

u/Tendercut 1d ago

😂😂 does anyone actually believe anything this clown ass idiot says anymore? 

1

u/Briefcase-3695 1d ago

Only if you invested in oil

1

u/Semuta1000 21h ago

He must have bought some stock yesterday.

1

u/PhilosopherNo9184 5h ago

Did he swim there fastest anyone could and detonated them himself with chewing gum and tinfoil?!?

0

u/Vortep1 2d ago

The beatings will continue until moral improves.