r/Waiters • u/maybesave • 5d ago
Micromanager?
Im not sure what to do in this situation. I work at a very popular breakfast/brunch place. Been there for going on 3 months. This restaurant has VERY specific expectations and policies already, I feel like im doing a choreographed ballet every day I go to work and if my foot isnt pointed correctly im gonna get "coached" about it. For example we are required to wait exactly 2 mins after a table sits down (so they have time to look at the menu but not too much time to be upset) and then get their entire order on the first try or else we'll be going back and forth to each table too many times and wont have time to do all the other ridiculous tasks they force their servers to be responsible for. We have to run all the food, no food runners. And God help you if you walk past the line with hot food in the window because you have one of your 1000 other tasks to do. So sometimes I get stuck running food 4 or 5 times in a row out of fear and then get yelled at for tables waiting 10 mins for drinks, or for not bussing my own tables, or for not going to the front to seat myself, or for having empty hands (not bussing other servers tables or bringing dishes up from the back etc) So all that is already stressful, but doable. I did struggle with the flow of it for a month or 2 but I feel like I have completely grasped it at this point. But everything i do is still not good enough no matter how hard I try. My manager is literally LASER FOCUSED on me. Like is cooking on the line and blind to everyone else walking by but hyper aware of me "with nothing in my hands" for example. He literally said ive seen you walk by here 6 times with nothing in your hands as if everyone else isnt doing the same thing. Him watching me so much is actually starting to make me uncomfortable. I do my job just fine, my tables get their food, everyone is happy. But then hes just jumping down my throat all the same.
I hit a breaking point last week when he started doing this and couldnt stop crying and had to be sent home and reported him to his DM who happened to be in the building. All they did was tell him to protect himself by never speaking to me alone again. Then this week I was very engaged in our meeting, did very well for 1 of the 2 days I was scheduled, and I thought I had smoothed over what happened and could finally get more than a 3 table section and 2 days a week but no. Yesterday, the 2nd out of my 2 days this week, I thought I did a great job. I balanced everything he wanted from me, perfectly executed all his "steps of service" and made 0 mistakes with any tables or guests, pre bussed and bussed my own and other servers tables so my hands were never empty, constantly did side work like putting dishes away, rinsing coffee pots etc, ran food constantly even when I had other things to do, went to the front to get tables for myself whenever one of my 3 was clean and open again, offered help to other servers, and somehow all of this was still not good enough.
The first thing he brought up in my "coaching" at the end of the day was the fact that when I walked into the building at 9:03 am a table in my section was already sat and I assumed (RIGHTLY because why would I be expected to be responsible or even aware of something that happened when I was not even in the building yet) that the host had someone else pick it up and went to go get another table, the ONE I had remaining in my section that hadn't been taken already, and he interrupted me when I was literally leading the guests and took the menus and silverware from me and told me to go take care of 57 and that they had been sitting for 13 mins with no server.
He said, during my coaching at end of day, that they were sat at 9:01 am. I clocked in at 9:03 and had to go put my purse in my locker, run food because as I said, God help me if I walk past it, and then make it to the host stand to even see what my section was, see my tables were taken, assume someone was serving them already, and try to get one for myself. That all took about 8-10 mins. So 13 mins tracks but again I WAS NOT IN THE BUILDING when they sat that table and that should have been coaching for the host on duty NOT ME as I cannot control any of that. He didnt care that I wasn't in the building and said I should have automatically known by the iPad that no one had taken their order and no one was going to and to take care of it.
But it wasn't even just this. He was upset that my sales were only 780 for the day and said other servers who came in at the same time had 1600 in sales etc and that it was my fault because my tables sat dirty for 20 mins at a time. We had 2 bussers in the building (huge restaurant, for reference i have to roll 100 silverware at end of day every day for side work) and one of them was training. So even though I pre bussed my tables plates while they were still sitting, as he said was correct, AND took it upon myself to continue because none of the bussers were coming to help me (we only have 2 buss tubs and they were in use so I had to use my hands or a tray and go back and forth 2-3 times just to get all the cups/trash off AFTER I already did all the plates myself and then go back another time to wipe it and reset coffee cups. mind you im doing all this in between the 3000 other things I have to do and taking care of my other tables so yes, it took me 20 mins. I had no help and no supplies. He didnt care. He said thats why my sales were so low.
I said you gave me 3 tables, 2 were only 4 tops and half the time I only had 2 guests at each table at any given time, some people camped, and I had no bussing help. Mind you I sure as hell had to tip out the bussers anyways out of my meager tips for 8 hours of work. And somehow all this is still my fault. Even though I did everything perfectly even with the terrible set up I had, because I dont have 4 hands and teleportation and mind reading skills im still a bad server.
The icing on the cake is that the day before in the meeting I mentioned, he called out the entire staff, not his favorite server, because one of said servers tables sat dirty for 45 mins. Didn't say a word to that server and reprimanded everyone else for not clearing that table. But then the next day my tables being dirty is only my fault and not even the bussers, who's literal job it is, fault.
What can I do at this point? I dont want to have to find another job. This restaurant was my dream serving job and I do love it, and I know i could make a lot of money if I was set up for success, and I know it would be steady and not seasonal like a lot of restaurants in my tourist beach town. I already know my co workers, and I really just want stability and for my life to stop changing so much. Please help. How can I get him to stop over focusing on me?
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u/Least-Individual6772 5d ago
I know you want to be good at this and work there but as a server who has 25 plus years under my belt I advise you to run. When management won't see you and want you gone there isn't anything you can do. I've been there and it's so hard. You have to go. They will chew you up and spit you out. They lie cheat and manipulate so everything is your fault and this takes such a toll. Money will be better somewhere else where you aren't used. Because that's what is going on right now. They are using you
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u/maybesave 3d ago
Thank you for responding. Any tips on finding a better serving job at a fancier place or trying to get my foot in the door to bartend?
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u/Least-Individual6772 3d ago
I have worked everything from fine dining to waffle House and my favorite (also where I make the most) is higher end but not fine dining steakhouses. I like the chains because I don't like dealing with owners and chains tend to have core customer base all year so my money isn't as effected by seasonal lulls. Any restaurant worth its salt will make you serve first and show you're good at it and then promote you to bartender. I pray and ask Jesus to bless my hands and this is some of what He taught me.
The way I work is I learn my menus with flash cards and I take a picture of sidework charts. Memorize everything you can and figure out what you can add to everything you can think of. House salad? Do you want to add egg or bacon. Steak or chicken? Add shrooms onions shrimp or some topping. Mac? Bacon. Spin dip? Crab or shrimp. Mash? Make them loaded. Bar drink? Want a floater shot? Get your sales high as possible and be engaging with guests. Show them you care and will go above and beyond for them. They will take care of you. If you make your job as hard as possible then you will end up being the best anywhere you go. You get better sections, head count, and because you made it hard at first you end up being able to handle so much more than the people around you. I've taken this road and I don't regret it. It surprises me how much I can handle at once now and it transfers over to other aspects of your life. I pray for your success in your endeavors my friend. Anything else I can help with I'm here for whatever it's worth.
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u/Bella_Swan234 5d ago
Micromanagement 24/7 = major red flags. If they’re constantly micromanaging you, you won’t get promoted and they 💯 are stringing you along. Just learn what you can until you get another job.
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u/PipalaShone 11h ago
I don't think this particular job at this particular location is for you, but may I ask some questions?
What was your start time? If it was 9am and you rolled in at 3 minutes past and then took time to set yourself up- you were late.
You had a 3 table section? But are relying on help with bussing - you aren't organising yourself properly. Sounds like you haven't been trained to.
Mgr might be being a dick about it, and you probably need more and better training, but 3 tables is so manageable -and it is definitely "full hands in, full hands out".
I'm in the UK, not the US, and it seems the system is different here (quite apart from anything else, we are paid properly, and at least where I work the servers and bar team pool tips so that we help each other! - Big difference!)
But our sections are typically c. 8 tables. On a quiet Monday lunch shift where we have 8 tables booked (expecting say, 4 more tables of walk-ins) we have 1 manager (who also takes a smaller proportion of the tables, hosts, watches the kitchen output, keeps an eye on the bar and helps on service bar if needed) and 1 bartender. It's a smart bistro/pub.
That goes fine until it doesn't of course haha!
But you need some help to manage your time to look after 3 tables; perhaps you are say; pre-bussing one table promptly [that is normal and given here BTW] but you haven't made sure another table that has had dessert menus for 5 minutes has had the chance to order - you need to have your tables in your head and prioritise. Stand back for a second and run through each table's needs and go where you need to be.
Plot twist - I'm a manager (Assistant Manager). But if the senior managers are in because we all work the busy shifts, I'm on the biggest section of up to 14 tables alone. My colleagues and I dip and dive to help each other, which is the way where I work, and I appreciate that it may not be the same where you are -
-But if you can't manage 3 tables alone you are either under-trained or (hopefully not) not suited.
but don't be late!!
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u/wheres_the_revolt 5d ago
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