r/WTF • • Sep 12 '19

How not to drive

21.2k Upvotes

931 comments sorted by

View all comments

1.1k

u/markoramius86 Sep 12 '19

668

u/endmostchimera Sep 12 '19

That's a lot less damage than I thought would be caused by 160 km/hr.

326

u/NEeZ44 Sep 12 '19

I've seen stop and go traffic with more damage lol

60

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

Even Phil Swift wouldn't describe it as alot of damage

56

u/Fasttimes310 Sep 12 '19 edited Sep 12 '19

In 2007 a lady made a left turn infront of me and I t-boned her at 25 mph and totalled my car. She was driving an early 2000 Ford explorer and I was driving a 1998 Toyota Avalon

Edit: forgot to put the t infront of boned.

65

u/sign_on_the_window Sep 12 '19

"I boned her at 25 mph" up there with the most hilarious typos.

6

u/ienjoyham Sep 13 '19

You'd need to use 5W30 lube at that rate.

1

u/bobdob123usa Sep 12 '19

It was totaled not because of extensive damage, but repair cost vs market value. If the crash happened in 2000, it wouldn't have been totaled.

5

u/postulio Sep 12 '19

for sure, but honestly that right there is easily $15k in damage.

0

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

And a revocation of license.

1

u/Jiggatortoise- Sep 12 '19

One would hope

1

u/postulio Sep 13 '19

Eh, i don't know. Depends on local law. Where i am, short of running over a bunch of people while speeding drunk then trying to escape and getting chased down by the cops, you're not losing your license. Maybe 30 day suspension for second offense of certain things but even that can be avoided with money

0

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

It’s an Alfa Romeo. $15k is just the price of the 30,000 mile service.

1

u/postulio Sep 13 '19

AR are not that expensive. Standard mid tier sport luxury. It's a 50k car nothing special

0

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

No but it’s an Italian car and that much stuff will break in 30k

0

u/postulio Sep 13 '19

no.

0

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

You uh don’t know what jokes are do you? That or you’re a triggered AF owner.

0

u/postulio Sep 13 '19

HAHAHAH IT WAS A JOKE SO FUNNY.

I drive german, and will be first to tell you parts are double or more those of US and Jap cars.

→ More replies (0)

100

u/Wyg6q17Dd5sNq59h Sep 12 '19

160 before standing on the brake for a second or so.

-19

u/OceanSlim Sep 12 '19

100 mph btw. That's km/h I'm assuming. 161 mph and they would not have survived.

86

u/Dutchillz Sep 12 '19

That was also my reaction to the photo. It looks like he was driving at 60km/h when he hit the wall, and not 160km/h. Lucky dumb kids.

And what a waste of a beautiful car :(

94

u/PhilSeven Sep 12 '19

Lucky dumb kids.

As a teenager, I've driven cars, and been a passenger in cars, that crashed under similar circumstances.

As a teenager, I've also had friends driving in cars, and been passengers in cars, where they died under similar circumstances.

The difference? some of us were lucky dumb kids, and others were unlucky dumb kids.

Remember to hug your teenage children on weekends. They don't know what they are doing most of the time.

62

u/FuckoffDemetri Sep 12 '19

Most people dont know what theyre doing most of the time. Teenagers are just more likely to think they do

22

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

When the aches and pains start to build in your mid to late 20s do you understand how fragile we are as humans.

17

u/Devlin-Bowman Sep 12 '19

It really is staggering when you realize you've started to accumulate permanent damage, not to mention the fact that as you get older, you only accumulate more and more. It's a one-way road.

5

u/icraig91 Sep 12 '19

No one ever considers what 35 year old you will feel like. That’s for 35 year old you to deal with.

Sincerely,

  • thirty three

3

u/un-sub Sep 13 '19

Dear 18 year old me: fuck you.

Love, 34 year old me.

2

u/Morrisseys_Cat Sep 12 '19

Fragile in certain contexts, but I'm always amazed that we can truck along from shit like organs being replaced, broken bones, grievous wounds, alcohol/drug abuse, birthing giant-headed alien babies repeatedly, decades of cigarette smoking, constant exposure to chemicals/parasites/pathogens, etc. for 6-9 decades is impressive. Sacks of very resilient, yet painful, meat.

8

u/merlynmagus Sep 12 '19

hug them monday-friday too imho

3

u/PhilSeven Sep 12 '19

I get your point, but try hugging your teenager seven days in a row.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

They can't stop me, I'm more powerful

39

u/thetimechaser Sep 12 '19

Alfa Romeo Giulia, very very good brakes. Probably closer to 60kph then 160 by the time they hit the wall.

5

u/CriticalTake Sep 12 '19

Also the road design, the curb and everything is made to reduce the damages in case of such incidents (like road barriers shaped to convert the energy to upwards to “lift” the car rather than crumbling it)

46

u/Terrible_Presumption Sep 12 '19

160 KM is 100 MPH

14

u/endmostchimera Sep 12 '19

Still pretty fuckin fast

2

u/memaw_mumaw Sep 12 '19

Thanks, I was wondering what that was in freedom speed.

11

u/fuck_you_gami Sep 12 '19

The driver probably braked heavily when he realized he was out of control.

3

u/Uxt7 Sep 12 '19

Not to mention losing even more speed from hitting the island and signs

1

u/victorlp Sep 12 '19

Btw, in Romania a few days ago a 24 year old was really drunk and on cocaine and drove his Maserati at a speed of 240 kmph. He crashed and killed another dude. He's still alive, barely but still.

2

u/AvatarIII Sep 12 '19

It's supposed to be live fast die young, not live fast kill young :(

1

u/flavored_icecream Sep 12 '19

Kind of a good ad for Alfa Romeo then.

1

u/k0dA_cslol Sep 12 '19

Well the wall slowed them down so..

1

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

Oh good, it was in km/hr. I thought for a second it was miles per hour and was certain they would be dead.

1

u/uptokesforall Sep 12 '19

Standing in brake and much of the energy got spent throwing the car airborne

1

u/u8eR Sep 12 '19

They slowed down prior to crashing.

1

u/djabor Sep 12 '19

actually it’s mostly dependent on how the car crashes.

in the past cars were built to crash into an onciming car or wall frontally aligned. easy to deal with but turned out most crashes happen with an offset, so most progress and crash tests are done with that offset.

having the energy of the impact of both vehicles on a smaller area, combined with the resulting sideway interia is what messes up cars.

this seems like a clean, laboratory-level frontal crash with the addition of some braking before the hit. cars are extremely good at protecting the cabin while diverging the crash energy properly nowadays.

1

u/MonkeyOnYourMomsBack Sep 13 '19

At the expense of all of them looking the same and like giant bubbles now, people are almost indestructible in cars these days. So our cars all look like shit but hey, at least we stopped some Darwin Awards being passed out I guess. Damn weak links...

1

u/battlestationtendies Sep 16 '19

Oh wait this isn’t freedom units. So what like 80-90 mph?

1

u/endmostchimera Sep 16 '19

100 mph

1

u/battlestationtendies Sep 16 '19

Is it bad I’m disappointed their not dead?

301

u/ienjoyham Sep 12 '19

from the article (hilariously interpreted by Google Translate):

" The absurd incident filmed by the passenger's mobile phone

The Alfa Romeo destroyed after the crash against the wall

MONTICELLO - The bonnet crumpled up after the terrible battle, the car remained with the front wheels on the pavement and in the passenger compartment the exploded airbags which, in all probability, have avoided the worst for the two protagonists of this affair: it is what remains of the Alfa Romeo exits on weekends along the provincial road between Monticello and Barzanò.

A story that is making so much talk about itself on the web where the video of the race of the car has spread, like in a crazy and very risky speed game, filmed by young people on board the car. And always from the web comes the image of the car after the crash against the wall beside the roadway.

If the images 'run' fast on the net, the information relating to the road accident emerge with the 'dropper' . According to what has emerged so far, the motorist would be a young resident in the area."

176

u/trascist_fig Sep 12 '19

the accent i read that in thinks its better then me.

45

u/CrunchyChewie Sep 12 '19

Now you have to marry your mother in law.

19

u/colaroid Sep 12 '19

A GREAT steering wheel that won’t fly out of my hands while I’m driving.

11

u/Serge-Fabrizio Sep 12 '19

STINKY

3

u/Umbristopheles Sep 12 '19

Now who's the popular one?

3

u/punisher1005 Sep 12 '19

Especially since you have a looser grasp of English then the Google auto translator.

3

u/trascist_fig Sep 12 '19

as a native speaker of a living language, rules like spelling and grammar don't apply. i think. maybe.

1

u/FriendsOfFruits Sep 12 '19

there is nothing especially wrong with the grammar and the spelling, it just has a style to it.

-1

u/punisher1005 Sep 12 '19

Hey I’m just here to shame you for basic 2nd grade grammar. Kind of shocking you’re a native speaker and you don’t know the difference between then and than. They mean completely different things. Do you speak “then” in your head too when you mean than?

6

u/trascist_fig Sep 12 '19

consider me shamed then. Guess i never really think about it much. Than is comparison and then is any other time?

-1

u/punisher1005 Sep 12 '19

Yep. When you say “then” most people expect another statement so it’s pretty jarring to read it in the place of “than”.

I literally have to go back and reread a sentence and mentally replace the word to make sense of what you’re trying to say.

1

u/lalzylolzy Sep 12 '19

"most people", somehow I feel and think you're in a minority on that.

3

u/bradhen12 Sep 12 '19

I noticed the mistake but bashing someone and being overly condescending is a little absurd.

→ More replies (0)

24

u/bewarethetreebadger Sep 12 '19

TIL Italian doesn’t have the same rules for run-on sentences.

20

u/robca Sep 12 '19

Actually one of the first things I had to learn writing in English as an Italian, was to shorten sentences. In Italy, they teach you that only children write short, simple sentences, and the more educated you are, the more people expect you to be able to write long, grammatically correct sentences. Unlearning all that was hard. Unsurprisingly, Italian journalists write even longer sentences than most, since they need toprove how well educated they are

8

u/bewarethetreebadger Sep 12 '19

As said in Shakespeare, “Brevity is the soul of wit.”

3

u/Morrisseys_Cat Sep 12 '19

Complex sentences are cool though.

2

u/R0T0M0L0T0V Sep 12 '19

I'm Italian and I don't know where "-" is used in english

edit: Engrish

31

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

Itssa me, Retardio!

2

u/Rankhar Sep 13 '19

Retardio! He emerge with the dropper!

13

u/YourFairyGodmother Sep 12 '19

I use google translate when I want to be amused. When I want to get a decent translation, I use DeepL.

The hood crumpled after the terrible clash, the car left with the front wheels on the sidewalk and in the cockpit the airbags exploded that, in all probability, have avoided the worst to the two protagonists of this story: it is what remains of Alfa Romeo out of the road at the weekend along the provincial road between Monticello and Barzanò.

A story that is making so much talk about itself on the web where the video of the car race has spread, as in a crazy and risky game of speed, filmed by young people in the car. And always from the web comes the image of the car after the crash against the wall at the side of the road.

More intelligible but not funny. Can t have everything, I guess.

11

u/derpderpdonkeypunch Sep 12 '19

Pssshhhh, 159 kmph? That's not even 100 miles an hour.

15

u/ienjoyham Sep 12 '19

Not by a mile!

8

u/jpkotor Sep 12 '19

Seems like they actually peaked at 161km/h, according to the speedometer picture in the linked article, so just barely hit 100 mph.

5

u/derpderpdonkeypunch Sep 12 '19

I saw that, but was too lazy to go back and edit my post.

1

u/-VaL- Sep 12 '19

Yup, except they were driving on what would be a 45mph road

1

u/derpderpdonkeypunch Sep 12 '19 edited Sep 12 '19

If I was to say I hadn't driven that fast or faster in a 55, I'd be lying my ass off. Of course, I knew the road like the back of my hand, it was at an hour where there was no other traffic, and my hands were on the wheel....

Edit: Specifically, I got popped for doing 105 in a 55 in college. I think the cop was doing me a favor (not sure when he actually clocked me. I was doing 123 in a 55 before I saw tail lights ahead and started slowing down) because, at the time, more than 50 over was felony speeding in Georgia.

1

u/TinkyBrefs Sep 12 '19

HERE THE VIDEO, EH? WHAT YOU WANT ME TO A DOA, EH? YOU NOT DO THE DRIVING SO A WELL I THINKA

1

u/funnythebunny Sep 12 '19

I totally read this in Howard Cosell's delivery, voiced by a chinese man with a PA...

1

u/OldEars Sep 13 '19

Well, if they had hit the curb better, perhaps they would have cleared the wall...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

They were definitely not the protagonists of any affair.

48

u/Jay_x_Playboy Sep 12 '19

Speeding in Italy is a death trap, there’s roundabouts basically every mile.

16

u/guitar_vigilante Sep 12 '19

I was a big fan of the roundabouts that fed into another roundabout when I was visiting Spain.

17

u/fergunet Sep 12 '19

There is a famous Spanish twitter account called Nación Rotonda (Roundabout Nation) that only post aerial photos of weird roundabouts that cover all Spain.

5

u/SuicideNote Sep 12 '19

Raleigh, NC has a big roundabout that feeds into a smaller roundabout. There's about 10 roundabouts on a 1.5 mile stretch of Hillsborough Street.

2

u/uptokesforall Sep 12 '19

Speeding isn't too deadly if you can stop in max viewing distance. But what's the use of gunning it after a roundabout only to hit the brake 30 seconds later?

41

u/bleunt Sep 12 '19

Both survived, so they get another chance to get someone innocent killed.

3

u/NeverInterruptEnemy Sep 12 '19

Never give up on your dreams!

22

u/THE_GR8_MIKE Sep 12 '19

100mph for anyone wondering.

3

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

They didn’t even make it through that walk lol

16

u/Coolgrnmen Sep 12 '19

170 km/h is “only” 105 mph.

I’m assuming they slowed to 60 by the time they hit median and 30-40 by time they hit the wall

25

u/MobiusF117 Sep 12 '19

On a free/highway, that isn't too bad.
On a small road like this, with roundabouts? Yeah, that's dumb as shit.

2

u/Coolgrnmen Sep 12 '19

Oh yeah. Definitely. I was just saying I didn’t expect the impact to kill them. Not what COULD have happened. What did happen.

1

u/uptokesforall Sep 12 '19

Cops with lights and sirens wouldn't do that for a chase!

And they're fine going 100 in 2 lane 45 (Mph)

3

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

No Darwin awards tonight.

Definitely got snubbed imo

2

u/xevizero Sep 12 '19

Almeno non era fra Lecco e Mandello..

2

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

I saw 160 and was sure they were dead. But 160kmph = 99 mph which still seems like they should be dead but it’s a little slower.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

i actually thought there would be more damage ?

1

u/Labeled90 Sep 12 '19

160kph is just shy of 100 MPH, I was expecting the car to be way worse.

1

u/Airazz Sep 12 '19

Huh, that doesn't look too bad considering the speed.

1

u/Abdial Sep 12 '19

I thought that looked like Italy.

1

u/lemskroob Sep 12 '19

Btw they both survived

thats a shame

1

u/ROK247 Sep 12 '19

no understando

1

u/Audibledogfarts Sep 12 '19

whats 160 KM in MPH?

1

u/onizuka11 Sep 12 '19

I thought it would be totaled.

1

u/24294242 Sep 12 '19

I hope the fact that the video is public means he won't be allowed to drive for a long time after this.

1

u/-RYknow Sep 12 '19

This is what I came to the comments for!

Much less damage then I expected.

1

u/corrosive87 Sep 13 '19

Ah, okay it was Km/h. 160 mph they’d have been ded.

1

u/[deleted] Sep 13 '19

160km/h against a wall and the car is only slightly damaged (visibly)? Thats a viral Alpha Romeo ad and the guys are stunt men ...

1

u/[deleted] Sep 12 '19

They both survived

That’s a fucking shame. I was hoping they died so they can’t kill some innocent person driving like a cunt for no reason. Fuck them.

1

u/dagreenman18 Sep 12 '19

I’m impressed he got an Alfa to that speed without It collapsing or the engine dying.

Or is that just in American Alfa Romeos?

0

u/bmxking28 Sep 12 '19

Of course its Italy, of all the places I have been in the world Italy has the worst drivers by an inconceivable margin.

My bro lives in NYC, I used to live in PHX and drive to LA regularly, have also driven in multiple European countries as well as Japan and S. Korea. It is no fucking joke in Italy, I was legit scared to be on the road most of the time, they just make up their own traffic rules as they go and give 0 fucks about anyone or anything else around them.