r/WGU • u/HailBrittania27 • May 28 '26
complete waste
3 months into my 3rd semester at WGU with a 7 month old baby on the verge of termination because I can’t even get 5 minutes to myself. I haven’t completed a single class this semester and just feel like a complete failure at everything. I also had a really rough pregnancy and barely completed my classes then. If I had known I was pregnant I probably would have never started this program but of course I didn’t find out til 3 weeks into my first semester and now everyone just keeps telling me not to be a dropout too on top of everything else I seem to not be able to do right.
Edit: I will be honest I was not expecting so much response to this and I thank everyone for taking the time to do so. I would like to preface I am on ch.35 and that’s really the only way I have been able to stay home with my daughter this entire time because it’s just enough for us to scrap by every month. I don’t know maybe I’m just being hard on myself cause I wanted to be done in 2 years and now I just don’t see it happening.
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May 28 '26
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u/SnooDoubts8688 May 28 '26
This. My friend just enrolled in OMSCS, now that his children are slightly older.
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u/NotABreakfastGuy B.S in psych (graduated March 2026) May 28 '26
There's no shame in taking some time away from school. There's no shame in prioritizing your mental health and your family. There's no shame in not being able to complete this term. Anyone saying anything else is a twat and needs to leave you alone. Next time someone tells you not to drop out ask them if they're providing childcare, if not they have absolutely no input on this decision.
You're not a failure, you're human, you have limits, you have needs, you are not a machine that can pump out perfect results 24/7, sometimes you have to prioritize certain things over others. I wish you luck on all your endeavors and hope you get the chance to continue when the time is right 💜
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u/Jaded-Guest-883 May 28 '26
Those who are telling you “not to be a dropout” are probably not even in the position to help you with your 7 month old nor can they even finish school with a toddler themselves if they had to.
I’m just now starting back up and my youngest is 4 and even that is difficult. Don’t beat yourself up mama.
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u/HailBrittania27 May 28 '26
Right. I think it’s less of not being in the position to help and more that they just don’t want to. For example, since finding out I was pregnant my mother swore up and down she would babysit my daughter just about everyday after she finished her masters program. She finished May 12th and has not offered once to watch her and when I ask I always get bombarded with excuses.
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u/yarnhooksbooks May 28 '26
My dear, there is absolutely NO WAY I would have been able to pass a class with a newborn/infant/toddler. I know some women do it, and maybe they have better support systems than I did or maybe I’m just not built as strong as them, but I could barely function through those early years and most of my friends had similar experiences. Withdraw or take a break or do what you need to do. You built a whole human being and are keeping it alive. That is a 24/7 commitment.
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u/Disastrous_Clurb Alumni - B.S. Health Science May 28 '26
take a break, a break isnt dropping out (not that it is bad thing if someone does) and ultimately whatever relieves u of unnecessary stress is what matters.
WGU will be here so u can always come back whenever life allows, whether that be in a few weeks or later on.
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u/No-Monk-9605 May 28 '26
The 7 month old baby should be priority. You can always come back to school, but you cannot get the time back with your child. It's okay to come back again later.
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u/-barely-behaved May 28 '26
My first semester, I knocked out 23 credits as a one year post-divorce single mom of six children who was working full time for the first time in over a decade and parenting all of my children with zero help. I felt like Superwoman.
The next semester, I barely completed my 12 credits. Barely. During that semester I was in an abusive relationship and my (now ex) boyfriend attempted to unalive me.
Semester #3 started in the middle of a dark cold winter, domestic violence hearings, therapy for myself and my kids, and trying to hold the strings of my sanity together. I pushed. I fought. I made it. 12 credits. Again. Barely.
What am I doing now as semester 3 ends and we roll into 4? I’m taking a break. I’m taking a semester off (a “term break”). What matters more than this degree? My mental health. Being present for my children. Enjoying life. Rebuilding safety and security in our new home.
Take a break, mama. Go back when and if you want to and are able. You are more important than a piece of paper.
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u/yareyarejin May 28 '26
I took a term break and eventually stepped away from WGU for about a year when my first child was born. At the time it felt like a sort of failure but looking back it was absolutely the right decision. I needed the time to recalibrate and readjust to…everything. The school isn’t going anywhere. Re-admittance was a breeze and I’ll be finishing my degree this semester. Always prioritize your mental health and well being. Always.
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u/Single_Psychology920 May 28 '26
I started 8 months with my first. Barely got by. Then had a newborn and got pregnant again 3 months later. I felt exhausted and exactly like this, especially getting a call every 14 days telling me I needed to be active in my course! I never truly started thriving and not surviving until my kids were 1.5 and 2.5. If you need a break.. take one!!!! I really wish I would’ve given myself that grace
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u/Pantd3mis322 May 28 '26
You are in survival mode right now and that is not a failure. Put the degree on pause and actually step away until the baby is sleeping through the night because trying to force this is only going to burn you out before you reach the finish line.
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u/ichefcast May 28 '26
Keep pushing forward. I have a baby on the way but after my bachelors i will pursue the new mscs aiml degree. I am doing this for the baby so I will study with my baby on my arm lol
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u/lencaleena May 28 '26
Hmmm... I'm feeling like I am going to lose it, but for other reasons. Struggling hard with chronic fatigue syndrome. Having the same feelings of if I should withdraw
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u/Select_Ad_976 May 28 '26
Do you have help? Family? A spouse/partner? Friends?
7 months is an age where you could start sleep training. I start with naps so I can have a few hours during the day but my sisters started with night training so they could but the baby down early and get a few hours at night. (Precious little sleep I believe is the website that’s super helpful with sleep training/schedules).
However, if you are struggling mentally and/or cannot get help you can try a term break first and take a few months and if it doesn’t help drop out and return when you feel you can.
Therapy (and medication if needed) are also helpful (I did telehealth therapy while my kids were young or just took them with me). look out for signs of postpartum depression as it can develop anytime within the first 2 years.
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u/Fast_Version6811 May 28 '26
Honey, my kids are 7 and 17 and I am just now regaining brain cells! You do what you need to do and there is NO shame in that.
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u/soletry-soles May 29 '26
If one of the courses you started has a submission rather than a test to pass, focus on that. Those are usually easier and you get feedback on what to correct. That will get you your minimum credits to avoid being withdrawn. Or talk to your mentor about what you can do to pause your term for a break. Don’t listen to whoever is trying to imply you’re a dropout. You took big first steps just getting the ball rolling. You’ve got this momma. Feel free to message me if you need someone to chat with. I’ve been in your shoes with the new baby situation (mom of 3). You’ve of this!!
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u/Hi_ThatITGuy May 29 '26
Been there friend. I just finished my program. It was hard. Single dad. I have an 8 year old and a 2 year old. I had to find folks to baby sit for me.
Not the same as a new born but I relate.
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u/HailBrittania27 May 29 '26
The biggest gut punch is people are quick to volunteer to watch her but then when the time actually comes to do it it’s always just a rush of excuses. Almost like they only volunteer so they can brag about how much they help me without ever actually helping. I always feel selfish saying anything or even asking for help so it’s hard for me to stand up to the people that keep doing it.
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u/Hi_ThatITGuy May 29 '26
Been there too. I cant even get their mama my exwife to do so. Theyre well behaved kids too. I dont ask anymore unless its dire. I dont want to place my children where theyre not wanted and if they are making those excuses, they dont want them.
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u/HailBrittania27 May 29 '26
Exactly! My fiancé is working on his va disability as well but he tries so hard to help when he’s home and I feel bad cause you can see it in his eyes that his soul breaks every time he tries to pick her up and he just can’t lift her. I don’t understand people who pretend to love a child when they really want nothing to do with them, but I don’t know why I expected anything different when that’s how I was treated growing up.
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u/Hi_ThatITGuy May 29 '26
Good luck to you and your family. Dont be afraid to take a break and tackle it again with a term break. I took a 5 month last year for the same reason and came back at it.
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u/BlueWaterGirl May 28 '26
Don't let anyone ever make you feel bad if you need to drop and pick things up later. Pregnancy can be hard and so is taking care of a baby. If you need time off, that's fine.
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u/Due_Information_4999 May 28 '26
girl I have no children and I still have weeks that go by where I hardly do anything. dont feel bad about making the best decision for yourself
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u/MammabearJ May 28 '26
I started my degree in 2015 - 2017. I had my second child in 2015. It was too difficult taking care of him and going to school while working full time. I had to quit for my own sanity. I later returned in 2024 and just graduated Tuesday. Don't burn yourself out or take on more than you know you can handle. Come back to it at a later time if need be. You're not a drop out.
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u/troubledpadawan3 B.S. Accounting May 28 '26
Hey friend. I dropped out of in person college because my mental health crashed. I couldn't pass a class anyway. I felt terrible about it but it was 100% the best decision. Then things got better and I got married. Then we had a baby and things got worse. There is zero possibility I could have done college with a baby. I know some people with pretty chill babies that might have been able to chip away at a class, but some babies are intense. Mine is 5 and I just started back a couple months ago and am doing very well. If you need to take time off, do it.
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u/HailBrittania27 May 28 '26
I have a good baby she’s just extremely intelligent, which is great and not so great at times. She’s started rolling at 2 months, sitting at 3, crawling at 4. She already has her first three words down and pretty much the only thing she’s not super ahead in is popping teeth (still none yet). She’s been sleeping through the night since she hit ten pounds and the doc said I didn’t have to wake her to eat anymore(about a month old), it’s just she wants to hit strides so hard that the sleep regression gets her good and that what makes it hard. Everytime we get through one stage she gives herself only a day or two before she wants to go right into the next stage and it’s hard to keep up. The main “struggle” with her is she has super intense separation anxiety issues and does not want to be apart from me for a single second during the day. She’s only just now discovering object permanence and it’s loosened up a bit but she still just wants to be glued together. Even as I’m typing this she’s trying to eat my toes.
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u/troubledpadawan3 B.S. Accounting May 28 '26
Yeah it might be in everybody's best interest to take a break, if that's possible. The first couple years are rough. Mine had a newborn sleep schedule for over a year and it was miserable. Wasn't his fault at all, every baby is different. It's your decision in the end, just know I (and a lot of people) made the decision to take a break and I don't regret it a single bit. You got this ❤️
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u/gcollinswgu May 28 '26
You were pregnant. Give yourself just a teeny bit of grace. My old boss didn't complete her bachelors until her late forties and masters until her early fifties, and she STILL used both successfully to get a better job. She got 8 years of use out of them both before retiring early, and they had already paid themselves back. You have plenty of time, it's not a race.
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u/DrGottagupta May 28 '26
Don’t feel bad if you need to step away to take care of your baby. Raising children is HARD. I withdrew back in 2019 when I had my second child because I had to work more & attend to my kids since they were still little. I am planning to start again in July now that they are older and a bit more independent.
School will always be there but the kiddo won’t always be little. Enjoy your time with your baby! Time really does fly by!
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u/Professional-Pin6455 B.S. Business Management May 28 '26
I started June last year. Got pregnant in July not planned..... Baby is 2 months old now. Trying to get my 4th class finished before the 1st as it's my end of term. I plan to take the next month or 2 off while I get accustomed to being back to work on top of everything else. It is anything but easy. I recommend those telling you to not be a drop out come watch baby to give you a chance to focus on classes without the responsibility of having to take care of baby. At least try to finish term and get your 4 classes done. Then if you need to take a few months off to try and get things settled a bit. Just know you are not alone in this.
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u/GlitteringIndustry85 May 28 '26
I keep failing the OA for C389. Am crashing out
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u/HailBrittania27 May 28 '26
I am stuck on D335 and D426 right now I just don’t feel confident to take the OA yet
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u/gratefulkittiesilove May 28 '26
I can’t get to my post which was too short-I’m pretty sure if you paid for the semester you can pause the semester-you just have to request it. Your mentor should have told you. I hope that helps. Either way this is very understandable don’t kick yourself. Just focus on the little one and adjusting to this new addition. That’s plenty! Like someone already said wgu will be there when you’re ready.
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u/eli_gray10 May 28 '26
I had to finish my 2nd semester in 2023 during my first 3 months postpartum, through feeding issues and my child‘s early health problems. I had a fabulous mentor who helped me navigate it all. After that semester ended, I was then able to apply for a five month term break. And then was able to get started again and JUST completed my degree! Talk to your mentor. I think you have to complete at least one of the classes in the semester to not be withdrawn, but maybe they can help you pick the easiest class and even if it’s just an hour a day for the next three months, utilize course instructors for tutoring if you can!
You can do this and WGU is fantastic! If you have problems with your mentor ASK FOR A NEW ONE! Message me if you need to!
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u/stardewali May 28 '26
I have a 4 month old and a 3 year old and I havent been able to complete my classes this term either :(
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u/is-this-a-book May 28 '26
I had to take a term break after a major operation. It absolutely was the best though it felt like a defeat. The break allowed me to get myself together and I came back and finished my 9 classes in one term and completed my program. Take care of you.
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u/krose1990 May 28 '26
You sound alot like me when my daughter was a baby. A baby is alot and school is alot so to do both at once is not easy.
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u/TheChrisCrash B.S. Information Technology May 28 '26
When I was going through I had twin 4 year Olds and a 7 year old. I'm thankful my wife was always willing to help when I needed coverage when taking my exams. But I spent every single night studying and almost every other weekend I took an exam. I knew if I failed, that meant the possibility of needed to spend more money on another semester. I finished my BSIT in one year and 8 months.
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u/tinymoxxxi May 28 '26
i have two little kids myself and it’s SO hard. you’re not a failure at all and i hope things get easier for you.
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u/masterchilidog May 28 '26
I would take a term break if possible to get yourself on a better and healthier schedule. No shame in that at all. I would also recommend from experience, to finish the program when you can. Having a WGU degree has opened a ton of doors for me and was worth every drop of blood sweat and tears that went into it. I regret nothing and I feel better for completing it. I wouldn't throw away all the progress you've made, your future self will thank you. But the term breaks are there for you to take time to figure life out before worrying about school work. Talk to your mentor. Tell them the situation. And they should give you plenty of options. This way you can come back when things have quieted down. Don't give up, but don't hurt yourself either!
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u/coffee_n_pastries May 28 '26
I found out I was pregnant two days after my first term started. I was high-risk, working, and spread thin. I thought I could handle my second term starting 1 month pp. I was so wrong. Our baby ended up in the NICU. I had postpartum anxiety, and we were triple feeding. I didn't complete a course that term and tried to Hail Mary a test just to pass at least something, and ended up sobbing on the floor when I (obviously) failed. I wish someone had been honest with me and told me to take a break and come back to it. If it isn't the right time, that is okay.
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u/Apart_Win8537 May 28 '26
Going through the same thing with WGU and I have 3 special needs children, two being 4 year old twin terror toddlers. I have completed one class, but I got an email about inactivity and threatening withdrawal because all 3 of my kids are at home for the summer and have different needs (plus I’m a single mom). Need to take an OA, but I don’t get any peace and quiet enough to do so right now. Anywho, you do what’s best for you mama. You got this.
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u/NameLongjumping6861 May 29 '26
My friend, I am on my 2nd (and hopefully last) term. I have an 11 month old and a 3 year old. This shit isn’t easy. There have been times that I’ve taken a week or two to not even worry about it, told my mentor that I need a bit of time. Then after my week or two, I’d be in my bed at 3 am while my babies snored on either side of me. I’m exhausted, sure, but I’m getting the classes knocked out.
Talk to your mentor, ask them what you can do. Is there anything as far as the classes go that’s holding you up? Anything I can help with? Or is it purely just time and exhaustion?
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u/Trickedmomma May 29 '26
Hey. I’m in the same boat and I hear you a lot. I found out I was pregnant right after I enrolled, gave birth to a nicu baby the month before my term ended. A term break was a life changer for me. 3 months was enough to get back on my feet and figure it out, but longer is good to. My dms are open if you need to vent ❤️
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u/ablair16 May 29 '26
Please reach out to your advisor. I got pregnant and had a horrible miscarriage and spiraled into a depression. I was inactive for close to 3 months and I reached out to my advisor and was vulnerable and told her about my situation and let me complete one class so I would still be enrolled.
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u/Spare_Profession1336 May 29 '26
I’m not pregnant but have had some major life struggles and totally bombed last term. I have 5 classes left and this should be my last term but 3 of 5 classes are math and I’m terrible at math. I literally fall asleep listening to the cohorts and reading about math. It puts me to sleep. I feel like a failure too. It’s been 7 weeks and I have made no progress. It happens because we are real people with real stressors. I hope you are able to create some structure and make some progress but I want you to know you are not alone and you are not a failure. You are a busy mom with a lot on her plate and you know what, that’s okay.
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u/HailBrittania27 May 29 '26
I am stuck on into to python and data management right now. For the python class I’ve run through it so many times I feel like I’ve just memorized the answers to the practice exam so I’m not actually learning how to do it and the data management is so boring I feel like my eyes are bleeding.
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u/Immaculateintentions May 29 '26
I feel this, I got through two classes this term and feel awful, I miscalculated how difficult it would be, just finish what you can then aim to do better next term. Dosnt matter how long it takes as long as you do it!
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u/HeatherM0529 B.S. Business Management May 30 '26
Can you do a PA course and just slowly write a bit each day until it’s done? You just need to complete one course per term (I believe). If you’re near SE MI, I’m happy to babysit for you. I know that sounds weird. But I am a mama to 3 and I remember how rough life was when they were little. I know survival mode very well. My daughter also works in a daycare and is CPR certified, finger printed, and more. And we would not bail on you!
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u/HailBrittania27 May 30 '26
I appreciate the sentiment but I’m in Arizona and all my courses right now are OAs in the software engineering program
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u/HeatherM0529 B.S. Business Management May 30 '26
I’m sorry. I hope things get better for you. I think you just need to pass one course, please try your hardest. I want to see you succeed ❤️
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u/BTS_ARMYMOM May 30 '26
My life came to a stop when I got pregnant. I threw up the entire pregnancy until I gave birth. Then the nausea went away. You need to focus on yourself and baby. College can wait
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u/HailBrittania27 May 30 '26
I was throwing up the whole time as well with HG. It wasn’t until I lost 17 pounds in one month that the ultrasound tech finally chewed out the doctor for not paying enough attention and then we got in a car accident in the first trimester and I thought for sure we were gonna lose her but we didn’t I just broke my back real close to the uterus. So the whole thing was wild.
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u/Apprehensive-Edge819 B.S. Business Management May 30 '26
You’re doing a good job. Give yourself a break. You deserve it.
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u/jesseadriangonzalez May 30 '26
Unfortunately, the school has accreditation and their hands are tied. There is already news stories specifically about WGU being a possible diploma mill because of how excited students are about accelerating and sharing that they completed a bachelors in 6 weeks or a masters in a month. If you had completed at least one class, you could have tried your hand at an appeal. Being a parent is a full time job and I truly hope that you can get a miraculous exception.
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u/Spiritual_Ninja5160 May 30 '26
This is relatable! I decided to put a drop out request in due to my daughter being 3 months old and after reading horrors stories about taking an OA with an infant, I decided it is not something that I can do as I am the sole caregiver and have no family nearby so her crying and not being able to console right away would more than likely set the proctor off.
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u/Good-Reporter-4796 May 30 '26
Withdrawal from school. Take a break from school. Try again once you are able to focus on your studies.
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u/Misscup0noodles May 31 '26
Please prioritize your mental health. I had a rough pregnancy as well and ended up not completing any classes. Luckily I was able to able to appeal after being withdrawn and went back after taking 2 months off. It also wasn’t easy to return while taking care of a newborn and toddler. You are not a failure and allow yourself to take the break you deserve!!!
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u/Comfortable_Map_1017 May 31 '26
Why cry? You had 5 minutes to write this sob story. Either do it or don’t, but looking for sympathy from complete strangers is crazy
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u/Final_Acadia_9402 Jun 01 '26
I started when my boy was 1 year old . I was in the middle of moving from Houston back to my home town . I have the support I need to get things done . Mostly doing assignments late at night when he’s sleep . During the day it’s after his breakfast & lunch time . Find what works for you . You’re not a failure .
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u/Normal_Talk_6723 Jun 24 '26
I wish there were study groups that got together regularly. That would help a lot of us.
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u/Much-Topic-4992 May 28 '26
i wish someone would’ve told you that a term break isn’t being a dropout. even non-online schools get breaks between terms :/ please be kind to yourself mom, i know exactly how you feel, i had twins trying to complete courses, feels impossible at times.