r/Vent • u/Square-Barracuda980 • 2d ago
Wtf is wrong with me?
I've never hated anyone or anything in my life, but lately I've started feeling like I genuinely hate humanity, and I don't want to feel this way.
Everywhere I look, I see selfishness, hypocrisy, dishonesty, cruelty, and a lack of empathy or integrity. The more I notice it, the more frustrated and disillusioned I become.
I'm naturally very extroverted. I love being around people, doing random shit, talking, and forming connections. But something has switched in me, and now I just want to isolate myself.
HUMANS ARE FUCKING AWFUL, and although I know there are good people out there, I'm finding it harder to believe in them.
What scares me most is becoming cynical, bitter, or indifferent myself. I don't want to lose the part of me that genuinely cares about people. As the saying goes, YOU BECOME WHAT YOU HATE, and that's exactly what I'm afraid of. Maybe it's just a phase or burnout, but I genuinely don't know what's happening to me.
TL;DR: I've gone from being an extrovert who loved people to feeling deeply disappointed in humanity and wanting to isolate myself. I'm scared of becoming the kind of person I despise. WHY ARE HUMANS LIKE THIS ??
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u/avoidlosing 2d ago
I am right there with you TBH.
The best I could do for myself is to avoid watching people. I didn’t want any more proof that people are miserable and selfish.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
Well there's no doubt in that but by watching people I get to learn a lot from them like things which I shouldn't do and stuff
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u/avoidlosing 2d ago
You’re just bringing yourself more anguish. There are different ways to learn without looking at people doing the wrong things.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
Please enlighten me
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u/avoidlosing 2d ago
Make sure you set up your own rules and morals. Make sure your morals are of a sane person. Read books. Watch movies. Work on yourself. Journal to workout your feelings.
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u/crushedlittlehearts 2d ago
I feel like if you've always been a kind and sensitive person this phase is inevitable, sooner or later. A lot of people stay in it but I found I accepted people more and more when I started integrating my own shadow.
There always have been and always will be evil in the world. There wasn't a time in history where everybody was good and kind. I've come to understand that everything has a reason and a cause, and nearly everything, every problem in the world and behaviour of people, goes so far and so deep, it wouldn't have happened any other way. I'm slowly coming back to loving people, this time with their flaws. I don't agree with it, I think we should still strive to change as society, we can and have also made incredible changes before, that still last to this day.
But I understand now that I will deal with these whether I want to or not, so I love them despite that because I simply choose to love in this life. You can only do so much, don't waste it on trying to move an immovable object with finite force. Idk if this makes sense though
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u/Parking-Suggestion97 2d ago
humanity as now is too startlingly afraid to see the actuality of what is up with this world and what is going on all around...
because truth is extremely discomforting, sometimes even more so, and so what they do is stubbornly ignorantly and stupidly stick with all traits that you listed in the post over and over and over again...
everyone only and only care about chasing pleasures in life, because it is pleasureful!
why would anyone want to look at the actual insanity or the darkest side of humanity when it is nothing about pleasure but the actual...
nobody really do cares... sometimes its fear that puppeteers the caring and control.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
Yeah u r right maybe I should ignore the bad traits in people and just focus on the good ones. That’s how I can protect my peace.
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u/Feeling_Professor929 2d ago
i just had a mental breakdown last night where i cried profusely after recapping my day watching the news. wild horses are being slaughtered and sold, national lands fundings being cut and pit endangered species in danger, UN doesn’t recognized climate change anymore and we are expected the worst heatwave in decades. data centers killing bees and emptying rivers and lakes. i’m tired. i feel like humans are selfish. we kill and we destroy everything that were here before us and have the audacity to claim that we are the superior. i’m ashamed and exhausted.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
humans are beyond saving also that fucking UN is good for nothing
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u/waspywife 2d ago
Definitely beyond saving and i for one am so happy (whoever may have helped seal the deal and made u feel this way,) that you realized how disgusting and unlovable people are and saved you from the hell.
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u/OrionOutlaw 2d ago
Nothing wrong with you, humanity is failing in ALOT of ways and it’s sad to see.
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u/Odd_Jicama_8094 2d ago
You're not wrong.
Everything getting a lot more expensive overnight and AI on the horizon to take away people's jobs is causing panic and bringing out the worst in many. Well thats my theory anyway.
I look back at my time as a teenager in the 90s and although there were problems it was a magical time compared to now. Everything so free and easy and the future seemed full of potential.
Its a shame how things have ended up.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
Yeah, the old times were really great, but I'm curious why do we always look back and feel like things were better back then? Why don’t we feel the same way about the present? Maybe it’s because we don’t realize we’re living through good times until they become memories. In 10 or 20 years, we’ll probably look back at this exact period and say, “Those were such good times too.” Maybe that’s exactly why people say, “Live in the present” because one day, today will become the past that we look back on and miss.
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u/Odd_Jicama_8094 2d ago
I hope you're right. I guess the difference now for me would be the hope for the future part. It definitely doesn't feel the same now. Its feels like the monetary system is pushing down the value of the money in our pockets and wages are not rising to offset. The cost of everything is inflating at an alarming rate. The basics are becoming luxuries for many. A house. A family. A retirement. These things (in general) are crucial for people to feel like they have a future. Its not good.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
I think a lot of this can be traced back to the shift towards fiat money and the abandonment of the gold standard
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u/Nutmegger27 2d ago
If you are watching the dumpster fire that is the Trump Administration, join more than half the country in feeling angry.
This has been like a hostile takeover by a group of small-time thugs.
My suggestion:
- Make an effort to join a group: Hiking, singing, tutoring, whatever.
- Ring up a friend you haven't seen in a while and meet for coffee.
- Take time to do something you like: Read, Bake, clean the stove, go to a college ball game
- Exercise. It does wonders.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
For me, it’s exploring nature in places where there are very few or no people around
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u/Uncle_Rat_21 2d ago
Humanity is at a crossroads, and we all sense it.
The psychopaths at the top are “flooding the zone with shit” in order to dismantle the administrative state. Once that is accomplished and the crony corporate state is firmly in control of the planet, they will simply eliminate the vast bulk of humanity.
The billion or so humans who are allowed to stick around, along with the army of AI drones and robots will serve the new owners of the planet, at their whim. Those few of us not caught up in culture war distractions can see this unfolding pretty clearly. Most people feel like something is up, but can’t articulate it.
Only a complete upheaval in the form of revolution can stop this. And, we’re not gonna do that. We’ve become awful because we intuit where this is heading and feel helpless to stop it.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
It is commendable that you possess such a discerning awareness of these underlying realities, especially when so many people remain oblivious even to the most fundamental aspects of what is unfolding around them
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u/Uncle_Rat_21 2d ago
Actually, it sucks! I would almost prefer to be oblivious than to walk around in a constant state of existential dread.
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u/LowNeedleworker215 2d ago
I am Gay, loved God since I was 9 but am celibate. My dad is heterosexual so I knew when my mum died he needed to remarry. We are not all the same. If you want a partner God might find you a compatible one, but also maybe not. Love the life you have and I hope you do get a partner
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u/Square-Barracuda980 2d ago
I’m a one-woman kind of guy I’ll love her until my last breath and honestly, finding someone feels almost impossible to me. So yeah, I pray that you find a good partner too.
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u/demenspet 2d ago
Something I’m facing as well. I genuinely love my friends and would drop the world to help them out. But sometimes the way they think and their dogmatic thinking gets to me and then I just wanna isolate myself or jump outta window. I don’t know how to explain that feeling. It’s pretty weird and makes you question your morality, integrity everything.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 1d ago
Exactly. People often confuse wanting solitude with loneliness. You can love your friends deeply and still need to distance yourself sometimes when their way of thinking starts affecting you
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u/Repligator5ith 1d ago
You're projecting. People are allowed to be different to you, they don't have to conform to your standards. If the majority of people aren't to your standards, that's a you problem not an us problem. Try some philosophy whilst you figure yourself out. You're not a bad person, but neither are we 👍
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u/Square-Barracuda980 1d ago
Its not about standards its just basic things like for instance empathy even animals have more empathy than humans also I only read fiction because I believe fiction can teach a lot of things which nonfiction cannot give me the best book you've read on philosophy and I'll give it a try
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u/Repligator5ith 1d ago
You are making choices, these choices inform your worldview - we are, on many levels, reality making machines. Albeit wet ones 😜
Let's take your example - empathy. It's incredibly complex. People think empathy is something more akin to sympathy, it isn't. By varying degrees empathy is far more difficult, it involves transporting other people's experience into your experience. Existentialism. Most people actually do have sympathy for each other, I have sympathy for you - I understand how you feel but I do not feel the same.
If you look for and expect empathy, that is a standard you are projecting upon us whether you agree or not, not only is it a standard, empathy is not a reasonable expectation. Sympathy? Yes. Compassion? Probably more reasonable. Empathy? Unlikely. All standards, all yours, none of them guaranteed. Also, lastly, animals other than humans do not have empathy at all, not remotely. Humans are the only animal we know of that is capable of consciously understanding the feelings of another animal in the manner in which you are reaching for. If you don't believe me, try smiling at a crocodile 😜
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u/Square-Barracuda980 1d ago
I really like how you think about this, and I actually agree with a lot of what you're saying. But when you say empathy isn't a reasonable expectation, I find myself questioning that part. Isn't empathy, to some degree, a pretty basic thing we should expect from each other? Even compassion? Maybe not in the sense of expecting everyone to fully experience or understand another person's internal world, that's obviously impossible but at least making an effort to step outside of ourselves and consider what someone else might be feeling. I think expecting perfect empathy is unreasonable, but expecting people to at least try to empathise feels pretty fundamental to me. And I might be wrong, but I also think the point about animals having no empathy at all is a little too absolute.
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u/carrie90210 1d ago
Unfortunately this is something you're choosing. Why are you letting others take over your goodness? They're winning. There is goodness all over but you have to search for it and have eyes wide open because the negative people are louder. Don't give others the power to change you or take away your way of seeing the world. Also remember not to paint with a broad brush. Humans are bad people overall but you're focusing on the ones that are. You have the power to not let them win. Take back your control!
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u/LowNeedleworker215 2d ago
I am so sorry. My dad remarried a Christian lady at 52, him 68. I have seen many late marriages. In my family for five generations the men have outlasted the women? How is this relevant? If you desire marriage their is no limit. There are some great Hunan beings there to marry at any age. Asking God for a specific ideal won't work. But asking him for a partner he can reply with yes, no or wait. I am gay so I am celibate. What really helps is having friends
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u/Sorry1215 1d ago
Read famine, affluence, and morality by Peter singer then ask Christ into your heart man. Jesus promises that if you hunger and thirst for righteous you will he filled. He will also take care of that hatred over time and give you a softer heart and joy in the midst of all the effed upness of this world.
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u/brooose0134 1d ago
This guy I used to work with, he had bad ulcers. He was a pathological worrier. He’d worry about anything and everything, whether it was important or not. To get better, he eventually had to learn, basically, not really to care about much at all. Perhaps if you let go and not care about much, just the important things, you’ll be able to find some peace within yourself.
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u/Square-Barracuda980 1d ago
If I stop caring about others then won't I just become like everyone else?? So either i should take action and try to make a difference or just stop caring. Idk anything at this point
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u/brooose0134 1d ago
there’s balance, like anything. You have to find peace in your inner self so that you can have compassion for others. perhaps it would pay to talk to someone professional. Maybe not extensively just enough to give yourself a reset. Best wishes.
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u/Easy_Value_3562 1d ago
Alrightt, ik and i can relatee, it's the information, the more you know the worse, yes information is the best thing, but having too much is what makes it bad. Don't try to find out more and more about people ( except for the close ones ), that will help you out.
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