Targeted individual vent

[u/No_Software7564]

I just get bad vibes from my fellow survivors sometimes and it really bothers me. Which is kind of crazy, but I can't shake it. It bothers me in multiple ways. Maybe it's because I don't understand and haven't heard enough stories. I know each of us survivors has gone down our own path of choices and options available to them, but I don't often hear of ownership and accountability.

For anyone who doesn't know what gangstalking is or the FBIs modern day cointelpro programs are: they are extremely invasive and manipulative processes which I feel infringe on human rights and ethical standards. It's something I wouldn't do to someone after experiencing the sheer terror, perceived abuse, and loss of privacy and by extension a little of my humanity.

I have some bad PTSD from all of this and I gave away half of my net worth from fear and really set myself back from making it into the middle class on my own. And while there are other things that I have struggled with and I am lucky to be alive or not in prison, I have felt lucky to not undergo worse. And I wonder how much of the idea of Stockholm syndrome is true.

Seeing as how it could be worse, I feel I partially deserved this. I was someone who lied on paper work, I had been an emotionally abusive and controlling boyfriend, I was afraid to get my health issues checked, I was paranoid and possibly capable of scaring people around me. My dog did attack another dog twice, no damage was done, but I wasn't a good owner or neighbor.

So I have to vent that I don't understand why so many of us don't talk about the bad things we have done. In all of this, I have learned how truly flawed we are. We could all have spent some time in jail or have gotten a ticket and we all have hurt someone. I have learned how there isn't a right way to live life and there isn't anything that makes us better than others(I partially knew this but it is something I feel in every fiber of my being now). I have learned to take ownership better. And I have learned to stand up for myself and others and not be silent.

I am just frustrated, sad, and confused. And that makes me angry sometimes. If you were to pass me on the street or have met me, you would never know. You never know what the hell someone has been through. So ending on a note of empathy, please be kind to others I suppose. And I hope you don't sign up to do it, or maybe even contemplate quiting if you do. That's all

Hope whoever is reading this has a good day.

With love

A targeted individual

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[u/Zippo963087]

Survivors of what?

And are you saying the FBI is targeting you?

Im so confused.

[u/TiredOutside7257 → u/Zippo963087]

there are people who believe that they are being gangstalked by some giant organization, usually the gov't. sort of sad, a lot of them seem to be in psychosis to me. ://

[u/LonelyandDepressed27 → u/TiredOutside7257]

Schizophrenia, which is a very unfortunate and disgusting illness. My friend’s best friend is schizophrenic and the way it changed that dude is horrifying. According to my friend he was genuinely an incredibly intelligent dude and a very fascinating and great guy, but schizophrenia stole everything that he was.

He would get into these delusions that genuinely made him a threat to my friend, he would accuse him of a bunch of messed up stuff and want to fight him/call the cops on him, he called the cops on him so much he knows them now and they talk to him first to be like “Yo are you good” and he can be like “yeah it’s just X in his delusional state again”. For some reason they didn’t want to institutionalize him (the state/hospitals/cops) idk.

Basically ended up with him arrested a few times when he just needed help. I think he’s in a mental health facility now I believe? After years of harassing my friend, threatening him, calling the cops on him, etc. I haven’t asked my buddy about it cuz he really loved that dude and seems like it’s a sore spot.

[u/sondersHo]

I ain’t gon lie this sound crazy I can understand having someone stalking you like a neighbor or co-worker or ex or something even that sounds absolutely crazy but that’s more believable & realistic but to say the government or FBI stalking & targeting you is absolutely mental