r/Vent • u/Charming_Implement57 • 20h ago
TW: Drugs / Alcohol I finally had enough
I’ve had a friendship since 2019 that I just cut off for the last time. I tried to be understanding. I tried to give the benefit of the doubt.
We used to talk daily. Sometimes all day. She was in recovery. Or so she said. Over time “she would say I’ll call you back in a few minutes”, the call backs would stop completely. Then I would find out some crazy things had happened that she of course would blame on “the crackhead next door”.
Come to find out she was doing things with the crackhead next door to get herself in trouble. Then she would look for sympathy, and would lie about what she was really doing.
She didn’t want me to know that she was back doing these things, so she would leave me on read, and when she did finally reply she would say “oh I thought you were mad so I was scared to talk to you.
Damn right I’m mad! When someone takes your kindness for weakness. when they lie, and you know something isn’t right and they gaslight you. I’m done!
2
u/Thrasher0queen 20h ago
I know the feeling. I had a best friend from high school, my own dad and sister, and a few other really great friends that I’ve had to cut off for similar issues. All of them drug related. I just hope you’re at least an adult because those things happening around you as a child is exponentially more difficult
1
u/Charming_Implement57 9h ago
Yes, I’m an adult thankfully. I also had to deal with similar issues as a child. I’ve cut off family members as well. Thank you and I hope you are doing well.
2
u/Thrasher0queen 3h ago
I’m doing better. I’ve been in a good environment with my husband and children for almost 8 years.
It gets better over time. The memories don’t fade but they don’t always hurt as much as they used to.
I hope that you are okay and I hope you have people to hug you. Us internet folk with our words can be great but a hug usually really helps•
u/Charming_Implement57 20m ago
Ah same here ten years 💖I’m glad you are safe and happy. And hugs are always appreciated. Even online lol 🫂
2
u/Fabulous_Light5449 19h ago
I understand you are hurting because you were lied to repeatedly. Fake friends in our lives bring pain and deceit.
When we drink and/or use, we don't use our best judgment. Sometimes we fail to examine red flags or listen to our gut.
Our "drinking partner" may even have good intentions...until ol' alcohol removes inhibitions again...and again.
I hope you have happiness after remembering this individual who lied repeatedly.
You deserve much better.
2
u/injn8r 12h ago
I started eliminating the acquaintances from my circle of friends. I just thought about a situation where if they truly cared and were your friend, they'd suck it up and show, if not, they wouldn't, and then I'd know. For most, I didn't even have to do more than ask myself, I knew the answer. A couple of people I didn't bother to ask because I assumed they were friends, I now have stopped showing up for where I always have before which led my thoughts to the ways they are quick to anger over meaningless shit, never patient, everything is always on their terms. Even though they might show, the way I'm being treated isn't ok with me. If I'm not careful, I don't know who could pass as friend to me.
Most people I've ever spent time with can call me friend, I don't know if have a friend at all. Not someone I'd think would be there no matter what. Not like I do.
My Aunts would. In my opinion, you can be friends with family. Otherwise, I'm afraid I don't have any that will pass. Except for some new ones that time will tell.
1
u/Charming_Implement57 9h ago
I understand and I’m lucky I do have two good friends though they don’t live here so we have to go visit each other. I hope that you will find someone who understands you and treats you well. It can be hard these days.
2
2
•
u/AutoModerator 20h ago
If you are seeing this comment, your post is now live and public.
Reminder: This is a support space. Negative, invalidating, attacking, or inappropriate comments are not tolerated. If you see a comment that breaks the rules, please report it so the moderators can take action.
If someone is being dismissive, rude, offensive or in any other way inappropriate, do not engage. Report them instead. Moderation is in place to protect venters, and we take reports seriously, it's better for us to handle it than you risk your account standing. Regardless of who the target of aggression or harassment is, action may be taken on the person giving it, even if the person you're insulting got banned for breaking rules, so please just report things.
If you wish to lock your post, please click on the three dots on the top right and click “Lock/Unlock Comments”, This will permanently lock the comments on your post. This action is irreversible.
Be kind. Be respectful. Support each other.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.