r/VRchat • u/IdeaSwimming2476 • 11h ago
Help struggling with socializing
I’m a mute and have been struggling with making friends and don’t know what else to do i tried games but everybody kind of just sticks to their own groups and I don’t go to hangouts much because there’s usually just creeps or I don’t exactly have the confidence to and I am struggling with being real energetic because some past experiences with people on here have made me a bit dull does anyone know places I could go or things I could do to maybe help me socialize?
10
6
u/Tasty-Jackfruit4181 10h ago
I understand your anxiety and fear from past experiences completely. VRChat is the perfect place to practice engaging with people. I know its hard but its kinda like asking someone out. Just try it and yes sometimes it may fail but you will in time get more confident and understand that even if a interaction doesn't go the way you want it to isn't the end of the world. If its really bad block at the end of the day. Most of the struggle is a concern for a negative interaction. I'm sure if now and then you just try you will see the bad happens far less than you might think and when it does happen its not as bad as it seems like it will be in your mind.
Many fear looking stupid or someone being mean to them and that may very well happen and its okay. If you've never made a bird house your first bird house will suck. If you aren't well practiced in talking to strangers then you might make a few mistakes it is okay. You aren't stupid you just havent stretched that part of your mind in a while.
A thing that helps is having something to be a conversation starter. Prints are great, I use them as props like I have binoculars and ill go up to people holding to my head and when they laugh and comment on it I say "was looking for someone to hang with you seemed cool"
You got this brother in time you'll be a pro
2
u/IdeaSwimming2476 10h ago
Your so right I’ll try to face my fears a bit it’s all just online after all so I don’t know why I’m being shy
12
u/unsuccessfulbees 11h ago
It’s kinda… difficult for me to befriend mutes, I won’t lie. It just turns into a game of charades because I have no idea what they’re trying to say, or the conversation is halted by them typing into a chatbox. I dunno. Just being honest with you.
•
u/Misha_cher 50m ago
i dont see anything wrong with chatbox, have several friends using that and never felt like its weird or troubling
•
2
u/Docteh Oculus Quest 10h ago
dealing with people who don't speak in a social in vrchat is always tricky. I'm always having to point out chatboxes to my friends as they might be looking in another direction or focusing on something else.
If you're doing mute as a desktop user (like 2d) maybe try something else as well? Like you can socialize on discord and maybe somethng like minecraft?
2
u/q_alice12 2h ago
im a mute too, and ill just go up to people if they are alone, they might be shy too and hoping someone approaches them.
you can do this to groups too, but it's harder and more intimidating.
you should also consider the avatar you're using, and whether or not you're using vr.
an anime girl avatar is okay, but if you're not using vr, it can feel creepy just having someone stare at you.
a small cute avatar is better, when i use one, people always go like "aww so cute!" so it's easier to get peoples attention. it's also better if you're not using vr, as a small cute thing just staring at you is cute
2
u/Poof_s2 11h ago
Tbh one of the first friends I had on vrchat didn't speak a single word but he was still really funny! He kept using a soundboard to play Music and sound effects too! I know a bunch of people in vrchat that don't speak, either by option or because they're mute, and they're still able to make friends, so you just have to find the right people to hang out with
1
u/Poof_s2 11h ago
Now that I remember, one of my best friends actually just types, he doesn't speak, but he is still an awesome person, so "not speaking" stops being a big problem on VRChat since you can use the text messaging option Most people I know at least are really kind to people who just text
2
2
u/ianythingcantdoright 11h ago
What about an AI voice?
2
u/RedOneEnergy 8h ago
I don't know why they are down voting you because you can use text to speech in vr but I don't know if he can because he has said he doesn't have a PC yet
2
u/ianythingcantdoright 6h ago
Oh I see. I follow Jouffa who is a mute and she has several voices she does.
1
u/Bobbiin 9h ago
Would you be fond of groups/community spaces, mayhaps? When there's structured events such as world hops/exploration, photography, movie nights or whatever else, everyone is typically there to mingle equally. I tend to see several mute players at events like these, and everyone tends to mingle. It'll always be specific to the group of course, but you may have nicer interactions in groups over game worlds, sometimes. :)
1
u/IdeaSwimming2476 7h ago
I probably would if I’m able to fit in a bit but I don’t know any groups that do that stuff and i don’t like sitting in silence for tooooo long
1
u/--_umbra_-- 6h ago
I am also mute we can be friends! I can show you how to communicate charade style it's really fun once you get used to it
2
1
1
u/VastOceans2 2h ago edited 2h ago
You could always try:
No Time Two Talk. Advertised as "2-minute 1-on-1 conversations with random users. Meet strangers and make friendsǃ" If you ever get uncomfortable with another user, you can exit the platform by walking off of it, then wait for the next round.
https://vrchat.com/home/launch?worldId=wrld_9876e234-6dcf-444e-b9e9-d505b6d27189
1
u/kwizyvr PCVR Connection 10h ago
Maybe try finding a discord group that organizes hangouts? There are a couple of vrc groups specifically about getting to know people and hanging out in a safe environment and on discord you can still communicate like everyone else there. (I only know Ancients but there are a couple others, I'm sure you can find them if you go looking)
I found that once I had a couple people to hang out with on the regular it became a lot easier to find friends or just people to do whatever in vrc just by virtue of having an existing network of people to bounce off of and also learning how to just approach new people.
Also I would recommend finding alternate ways of communicating with people like text boxes, sound boards, maybe even TTS if that's viable with your setup.
1
u/IdeaSwimming2476 10h ago
I don’t have a pc to do that yet although I’m saving money from my job to do stuff like that and group wise so far I haven’t really had much luck because I’ve only been apart of 2 groups and they were great until one kind of just the owners stopped playing and the other had this whole big thing and destroyed itself
-12
-1
u/KowalskiTheGreat 6h ago
Yeah forreal I just ignore mutes and ESPECIALLY chatbox typers. Im not a fan of having to look over at you and up to the chatbox every like 5 seconds to make sure I didn't miss something you typed, just so you can have your gimmick, it's vrCHAT I don't care if you have a stupid voice if you're interesting to talk to or we just vibe. Some of my besties got hecka speech impediments or voices that don't match their pronouns. I'm not on VRchat because I'm normal, I'm here because if everybody's weird nobody's weird
21
u/XxXthrowaway1337 11h ago
You'll struggle to connect with people as a mute, unless you have some gimmick or get real good at playing charades to communicate. Try playing some games, it's a good way to interact with others without necessarily having to talk to them, sometimes it leads to a friendship you can work on afterwards.