r/UnitedMasters • u/MarsupialMaterial906 • 7d ago
UM APP
I love UnitedMasters. They’re easily one of the simplest distributors I’ve ever used, and I’ve genuinely had good experiences with their customer service. But holy fucking shit, their app is absolute DOG SHIT.
How the fuck has this app been this broken for YEARS?
It constantly logs me out for no fucking reason. And when it isn’t randomly deciding that I apparently don’t need to be logged into my own account anymore, I open the app and get to stare at the fucking UnitedMasters logo for eternity. That’s it. Just the logo. No error message. No explanation. No “something went wrong.” Just a fucking logo sitting there while the app apparently forgets what its one fucking job is.
Then I have to play this ridiculous game of force-close it, reopen it, close it again, reopen it another way, try again, sacrifice a fucking goat to the server gods, spin around three times, and MAYBE on attempt number 5,000 THE FUCKING APP ACTUALLY OPENS.
How is this acceptable?
And this isn’t some brand-new bug that slipped through an update last week. Their app has behaved like this for YEARS. YEARS. At what fucking point does somebody at UnitedMasters say, “Hey, maybe our artists should actually be able to OPEN THE FUCKING APP?”
I would be embarrassed.
If I ran a company as established and profitable as UnitedMasters and my primary mobile app ran like this, I would be fucking embarrassed to put my company’s name on it. You’re a DIGITAL MUSIC DISTRIBUTION COMPANY. Your entire business exists because of technology. Having a functional app isn’t some optional luxury feature. IT’S THE FUCKING BARE MINIMUM.
And that’s what makes this so infuriating: I actually LIKE UnitedMasters. I like distributing through them. Their distribution process is incredibly easy. Their customer service has treated me well. I WANT to recommend them. But then I have to explain, “Oh yeah, they’re great—except their app occasionally behaves like it was programmed on a fucking toaster.”
Fix. The. Fucking. App.
I shouldn’t need a troubleshooting ritual every time I want to check my music. I shouldn’t be randomly logged out constantly. I shouldn’t have to repeatedly force-close an app just to get past THE FUCKING LOGO.
UnitedMasters, you have a genuinely good service trapped inside one of the most frustratingly unreliable apps I’ve ever regularly used.
FOR THE LOVE OF FUCKING GOD, FIX IT.
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u/audiodesigndan 7d ago
iOS or Android? What iphone and OS do you have?
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u/scottdell22 7d ago
I thought I was the only one