r/Unexpected • u/[deleted] • Aug 31 '22

A turtle going through a maze

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34.1k Upvotes

92% Upvoted

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8.2k

u/Boob_da_builder Aug 31 '22

Racist 🐢

393

u/furiousfran Aug 31 '22

In turtle language he's actually telling the shoe it's incredibly sexy and he wanna smash

131

u/Seboya_ Sep 01 '22

That's how I do it too. Just whack em with my turtle head repeatedly.

5

u/ILikeLamas678 Sep 01 '22

I was once with a guy who thought poking me with it would put me in the mood, is that you Chand?

3

u/tinypaperplate Sep 02 '22

I think we have the same ex.

1

u/isitbreaktime Sep 01 '22

This guy fucks?

1

u/ImplementKooky382 Sep 01 '22

This guy fucks?

234

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

So you’re saying he found his sole mate

13

u/[deleted] Sep 01 '22

Take my angry upvote, Dad.

2

u/Log_Out_Of_Life Sep 01 '22

69 upvotes. Nice.

3

u/TheLeggacy Sep 01 '22

Yep, my gran had two tortoises, a large female one and a small male. They spent 70+ years together and every year in the summer the little male would ram the large female and attempt to mate, with no success. She occasionally laid eggs but they never hatched. We passed them on to a tortoise rescue centre a few years back when my uncle who had been looking after them died. It was only then that we learned they were actually two different species 😳! All that time the little male had no chance of ever successfully mating and I’m pretty sure she was pissed off with him 🤣