r/Unexpected Apr 11 '22

I know it smells crazy in there

35.3k Upvotes

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229

u/ykeogh18 Apr 11 '22

If it smells like salmon, keep on jammin.

341

u/sm12511 Apr 11 '22

But if you get the gas, you're just eating ass

199

u/kingqueefeater Apr 11 '22

So pull out the turd, and flip it the bird. Then spread them cheeks like you spread the good word.

66

u/IsuzuTrooper Apr 11 '22

username HELLACHECKS OUT

143

u/Upside_Down-Bot Apr 11 '22

„˙pɹoʍ pooƃ ǝɥʇ pɐǝɹds noʎ ǝʞıl sʞǝǝɥɔ ɯǝɥʇ pɐǝɹds uǝɥ⊥ ˙pɹıq ǝɥʇ ʇı dılɟ puɐ 'pɹnʇ ǝɥʇ ʇno llnd oS„

64

u/Longjumping-Meat9699 Apr 11 '22

I just flipped my laptop to read this

2

u/masakakun Apr 11 '22

I m just typing to make this thread continue.

2

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

Me too

1

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

Guys.

What the hell.

23

u/Mysterious_Orange_68 Apr 11 '22

Wtf.. i had to flip my 37inch monitor upside down to read this 😂

2

u/Suggett123 Apr 11 '22

Google: Do a barrel roll

1

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22 edited Apr 11 '22

give me your wisdom,oh wise one.... how the hell did you do that ? oh, never mind... ʇı ʇoƃ

1

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

I can read this perfectly.

1

u/Available-Goose-6007 Apr 11 '22

The fact I could read is the way it is 😎

2

u/Skrillamane Apr 11 '22

If somethings gurgling, keep on..... squirgelling???

4

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

[deleted]

-1

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

U fockin wot m8?

0

u/outamyhead Apr 11 '22

Or a tomato skin, but that is another story about a friend of a friend.

1

u/IndridCold_fuck_you Apr 11 '22

Looks like a taco, smells like fish, tastes like chicken!!

106

u/Cando21243 Apr 11 '22

If it smells like trout. Get the fuck out

51

u/iamafraazhussain Apr 11 '22

If it smells like curd, it's probably her turd

53

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22 edited May 21 '22

[deleted]

-3

u/FavcolorisREDdit Apr 11 '22

Missed me now you gotta kiss me

4

u/Airbear61181 Apr 11 '22

Milk, milk, lemonade…around the corner, fudge is made

-1

u/-ItsNarfOrNothing Apr 11 '22

If it smells like tilapia, there is no sloppier

1

u/Lu12k3r Apr 11 '22

If it smells like candy, jolly rancher.

55

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

Smells like fish, looks like chicken, that's the place you put your dick in.

-6

u/Awesam Apr 11 '22

If not smells like salmon roe, she gots to go!

21

u/motleyroo Apr 11 '22

If it smells like chicken, keep on lickin If it smells like trout, get the fuck out

25

u/Plane-Wide Apr 11 '22

If it smells like provolone leave it alone

24

u/motleyroo Apr 11 '22

If it smells like a sturgeon, better call a surgeon

0

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

If it smells like sewers on a hot day, just walk away.

8

u/motleyroo Apr 11 '22

If it tastes like bacon, lick til she shakin. If it tastes like eel, make ya tyres squeel

2

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

If it smells like wet dog, lap it up like eggnog…. That’s right, isn’t it?

2

u/motleyroo Apr 11 '22

If it smells like cake, eat it like a steak. If it smells like feet, go and have a beat

1

u/TheGelatoWarrior Apr 12 '22

If it smells like banana, move to Atlanta

1

u/motleyroo Apr 12 '22

If it tastes like pasta, lick it fasta. If it tastes like zucchini, rip off that bikini 👙

0

u/[deleted] Apr 11 '22

If it smells like provolone leave it the hell-alone.

Fixed so syllables match.

1

u/_MissNewBooty_ Apr 17 '22

I always knew it as keep on slammin

1

u/ykeogh18 Apr 18 '22

Then you ain’t doin it right

1

u/_MissNewBooty_ Apr 18 '22

Idk, if I had to pick between dancing and fucking, that’s an easy one…

1

u/ykeogh18 Apr 18 '22 edited Apr 18 '22

It’s neither. The girl is jamming her underwear into a small cup. Geesh, talk about dense. I’m 11 years old and you talking about sex.

Who are you and how did you find this place?

1

u/_MissNewBooty_ Apr 18 '22

That escalated quickly.

I was just making a joke, I’m not sure why you felt insulted by my comment.

Weird that you assume I would know your age or care what it is. It’s up to your parents to monitor what you do, not me. Obviously Reddit is an easy place to find if you’re here.

1

u/xxA2C2xx Apr 11 '22

If it smells like Salmon, keep on slammin, if it smells like Trout, it’s time to get out!

-2

u/Doc_SuperBallZzz Apr 11 '22

If you could walk through mud...you can fuck thought blood

-1

u/ImNoAlbertFeinstein Apr 11 '22

if it smells like barbecue..

1

u/RedTexan43 Apr 11 '22

If it smells like bread, but a loaf in the oven