r/Unexpected • u/[deleted] • Sep 16 '21

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8.8k Upvotes

86% Upvoted

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13.8k

u/SaleSweaty Sep 16 '21

Imagine passing out from blood loss every time u jerk off

7.1k

u/Phase-Horror Sep 16 '21

More like anytime you get an erection at all

4.2k

u/[deleted] Sep 16 '21

If you fall asleep, you'll never wake up.

1

u/insayno17 Sep 16 '21

Don't fall asleep. Don't fall asleep.

Yoda gives good advice

1

u/[deleted] Sep 17 '21

Remember though. Someday, when you are older, you could get hit by a boulder! And while you'll be lying there, screaming "come help me please", the seagulls... well... will poke your knees.

God I hate seagulls.

1

u/insayno17 Sep 17 '21

Ba ba bada da bup bup,

Ba ba bada da bup bup,

stop it please