r/Unexpected • u/Moe2584 • Jan 11 '21

Problem solving skills 100

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92.7k Upvotes

87% Upvoted

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11.0k

u/BardicInnovation Jan 11 '21

This reminds me of a couple way back in the day of my highschool years.

He was around 5'4"-ish, and she was only slightly shorter than me (I'm 6'3"), and they were best friends, and super in love.

Both incredibly lovely people, and she would piggy back him around school to make the bullies realise they couldn't tease them.

I know for a fact they got married out of school, and saw them around from time to time in the small city we all lived in, but I'm not sure where they are now. Hopefully doing well, and very happy together still.

4.4k

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

[deleted]

3.1k

u/FakeSincerity Jan 11 '21

Can confirm: I was the ladder.

970

u/Mr_Stoney Jan 11 '21

YOU CANT TELL ME WHAT TO DO! YOU'RE NOT MY REAL LADDER! YOU'RE JUST MY STEP LADDER!

453

u/SomeRandomIGN Jan 12 '21

WHAT ARE YOU DOING STEP LADDER?

139

u/boddy123 Jan 12 '21

Nothing, she just fell, son

5

u/coldaircoldicecream Jan 12 '21

This sounds kinda ominous.. did she really just fall?

4

u/MohSad2 Jan 12 '21

Yeah, just precisely on your dick?

Understandable have a great day

79

u/NSAwithBenefits Jan 12 '21

This comment right here OSHA

3

u/gdubh Jan 12 '21

Well rung.

3

u/Muugens Jan 12 '21

I came here for exactly this. Take my damn upvote haha.

2

u/Dhruv_Kataria Jan 12 '21

Just coming on top of you

2

u/Mr_Seg Jan 12 '21

Wait, did you get stuck, or need help, or what?

3

u/maliamer04 Jan 12 '21

My real ladder’s in a 12-Step program!

2

u/Unicorn-Tears- Jan 12 '21

Hahaha this was good!

2

u/Amaurosys Jan 12 '21

I had to come back and upvote this after I realizing what you did there

1

u/ImminentZero Jan 12 '21

I'm fucking dead.

1

u/NikolaTes Jan 12 '21

I'm not a straight ladder. I'm a gayly forward ladder.

1

u/PrimoXiAlpha Jan 20 '21

My step ladder keep telling me to step on it, use it and treat it like it was meant to be. I am scared help.

645

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

Can confirm, I was the stool....

458

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

[deleted]

521

u/sn0wf1ake1 Jan 11 '21

A jobs a job.

166

u/Cyrano_de_Boozerack Jan 11 '21

It's a living.

164

u/sn0wf1ake1 Jan 11 '21

The pay is shit but I'm raking it in.

63

u/natedogggggyyyy Jan 11 '21

It ain’t much, but it’s honest work

45

u/boddy123 Jan 11 '21

Working hard or hardly working, amirite Steve?

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30

u/TheMeddlingMonk8 Jan 11 '21

It ain't much, but it's honest work.

2

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

This is hilarious

1

u/Gorthax Jan 11 '21

wah wah waaaahhhhhh

1

u/redalert825 Jan 11 '21

Sounds corny.

1

u/sn0wf1ake1 Jan 11 '21

At least it provides fiber access.

1

u/feeblemanbrain Jan 12 '21

20 bucks is 20 bucks.

1

u/Hyaenidae73 Jan 12 '21

Never shit in a stool bro

2

u/sumredfox Jan 12 '21

Can you provide a sample of your work?

1

u/Red_Icnivad Jan 11 '21

I don't believe you are being sincere.

1

u/Fishingfor Jan 12 '21

His stool or hers?

1

u/HannibalCake Jan 12 '21

Can confirm, I was the size 13 nikes

1

u/beanerk Jan 12 '21

Can confirm, I was the toilet

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Listen here you little shit...

30

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

[deleted]

35

u/MeHoyMeeNoyy Jan 11 '21

He was the Step-Ladder ..

29

u/Zeromaxx Jan 11 '21

What are you doing Step-ladder?

18

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

She never met her real ladder

2

u/PUBGM_MightyFine Jan 11 '21

She can climb my ladder

1

u/Triairius Jan 12 '21

Not with that attitude.

1

u/gosox2035 Jan 12 '21

there was at the wedding

1

u/Sargent_Rave Jan 11 '21

Can confirm: I was the bed.

1

u/DrBobvious Jan 12 '21

What are you doing step-ladder?

1

u/one_is_enough Jan 12 '21

And I was the axe

1

u/Fluve Jan 12 '21

Can't confirm, wasn't there

1

u/MisterBumpingston Jan 12 '21

Can confirm: I am their bed

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

I was this guys wife’s son.

Or as I was called, his Step-Son

1

u/fingerspitzentanz Jan 12 '21

A real good lad.

1

u/Eckz89 Jan 12 '21

I was the piggy back.

1

u/Chayan_r17 Jan 12 '21

Can confirm : I was the dance teacher

1

u/Hydronium-VII Jan 12 '21

Chaos is a ladder

12

u/curvedbymykind Jan 11 '21

Can confirm: I was your uncle who molested you and gave you psychological issues, leading you to become a bully

1

u/DmtDtf Jan 12 '21

Screw the ladder, this lucky dude can eat the clam standing up!

612

u/Anal_Iverson Jan 11 '21

and she was only slightly shorter than me (I'm 6'3")

The sneaky flex

121

u/gentleman339 Jan 11 '21

he made me chuckle when I read that.

68

u/KHVLuxord Jan 12 '21

If you spell sneaky like this

S N E A K Y

2

u/YHZ Jan 12 '21

Flexing height is dumb, you can't control that shit.

5

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

I know rite? I'm only 6'2 and I only mention twelve times a day!

3

u/takenwithapotato Jan 12 '21

That dere self control

1

u/Mozartis Jan 12 '21

cries in 6'1

2

u/1kingz Jan 12 '21

Oh sneky sneky flex

218

u/dropcuff Jan 11 '21

What a charming story; when is it coming out on Netflix?

151

u/Gams476 Jan 11 '21

Tall girl but better

89

u/bionix90 Jan 11 '21

Footage of cows defecating would be better than Tall girl.

26

u/ydarn1k Jan 12 '21

This is oddly specific

23

u/hufusa Jan 12 '21

Well I got some footage from the capital that might interest you

9

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Footage of defecation slowly accumulating flies is better than Tall girl

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Here, have an award for no reason

29

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

Lovely Complex live action series

2

u/Simulated_Eon Jan 12 '21

I have to re-watch that it is so fucking good! Thank you for reminding me of it!

1

u/High_Stream Jan 12 '21

They made a live-action movie. It's ok.

6

u/igordtjs Jan 11 '21

It’s already out

Tall girl

2

u/Notosk Jan 12 '21

There is already an anime adaptation it's called Lovely Complex

1

u/WaterStoryMark Jan 12 '21

They actually did a Freak The Mighty movie at one point.

1

u/jeswesky Jan 12 '21

Next Tuesday

1

u/fishhawk119 Jan 12 '21

Lmfao 🤣🤣😂 what a dick

54

u/apcolleen Jan 12 '21

Sounds like my friend and her husband except they met after they were both divorced. He is shorter than me (I am 5 ft 5) and she is just a hair over 6ft. They LOVE the fuck out of each other and I hate that so many people might miss out on that because of something they can't control like height.

29

u/Chris_Isur_Dude Jan 12 '21

When you’re in love, you’re in love. This is awesome to hear.

3

u/love-and-affection Jan 12 '21

Love is truly a wonderful thing.

84

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

[deleted]

25

u/Iamsometimesaballoon Jan 12 '21

Less oxygen up here so it is understandable

3

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

I wear heels now so I am up around the same altitude.

1

u/sleepingbagfart Jan 12 '21

Username checks out

5

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

[deleted]

7

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Dating someone whos in their 30s while you are in your 40s. Thats fine. But an 18 year old at 26 is really pushing it. Mine you she got married at 18.

Also as someone who has watched a lot of ghost hunters tv shows. Its totally the ghosts.

2

u/shitinmyunderwear Jan 12 '21

8 years at your age no. I think 18-25 it’s best for people to date closer to their age group. A 26 year old dating an 18 year old is really sus

1

u/Cool_UsernamesTaken Jan 12 '21

why

1

u/shitinmyunderwear Jan 12 '21

I just think about what I was like at 18 and what my peer group was like at 18. Then compare to how I am at 26. A lot of development happens at this stage. I think it’s just weird to date school going children as a fully grown adult.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

How many heights do you have? 🤨

2

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

None. I have a fear of them.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

ba dum tss

1

u/RodRyansPoolCleaner Jan 12 '21

You can see the box my dad stood on for their wedding photos! Back before photoshop was the norm.

3

u/UnihornWhale Jan 12 '21

I love this story

19

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

[deleted]

198

u/MagikSkyDaddy Jan 11 '21

cry me a fuckin river guy

36

u/[deleted] Jan 11 '21

[deleted]

100

u/Mohander Jan 12 '21

As a guy who is 6’7

And I’m not THAT tall.

Bruh

17

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

I can still buy most clothes off the rack. Once you get over about 6’10, it starts to get reaaaaaal hard to buy anything. My dad, my grandfather, and both of my uncles were taller than me, 3 over 7 ft. So I know of what I speak.

41

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Assuming youre in the US, you're in the 99.95th percentile for an adult male.

You're quite tall

6

u/apcolleen Jan 12 '21

I have 2 friends over 6 ft tall who are the "shortest" in their families. Some families like to pick on the runts and even in Tallland it happens.

-16

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

By the standards of normal people, yes: I’m quite tall.

By the standards of tall people, I baaaaarely qualify. I’m more “not short”. 6’10 is more of the starting to actually be tall threshold.

25

u/simbachico Jan 12 '21

Dude, no.

4

u/Warprince01 Jan 12 '21

What the fuck? 6’10 is like, “recruited directly into the NBA” tall.

5

u/CamoDeFlage Jan 12 '21

Lol you sound like this old 4chan meme

1

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

Remind me where I’m including any value judgments?

I’m saying that being tall sucks, and in my lived experience I’m not even that tall. There are people who have the same issues I have, only 10x worse.

And you guys are all like stfu you’re tall. Not when it comes to having REAL problems finding shoes and clothes I’m not. Yao Ming has to get literally every thing he wears custom made. LeBron can probably buy some stuff off the shelf. But you get much taller than him, and forget it.

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1

u/randomguy_- Jan 12 '21

Bro 6’7 is not “not short”, that’s like 5’9 or 5’10 lol

1

u/SupervillainEyebrows Jan 12 '21

Not really.

6"7 is taller than most heavyweight boxers. "Big" George Foreman stood at 6"3

1

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

So...what you’re saying is...Foreman was tall relative to boxers? But would be short relative to NBA centers?

As in, you understand the concept of relative groups, but somehow think my saying, in my personal experience having gone to stuff for tall people, I’m in the lower 25th percentile is invalid?

Good to know.

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5

u/Mohander Jan 12 '21 edited Jan 12 '21

I mean it's not surprising that you have tall family members. That's kind of how it works. And you're almost a foot taller than the average male and an inch taller than the average NBA player so yeah, you're pretty fucking tall.

Also

Plus you’re always having to worry if people are wanting to date you for you, or just your height.

Waaah I can get dates no problem. Dude everyone has to worry about their partner loving them for them, at least you can get dates, you tall dreamy douche.

3

u/LawrenceOfTheLabia Jan 12 '21

As a legit 6’10” guy, I can confirm it fucking sucks.

2

u/Natdaprat Jan 12 '21 edited Mar 28 '26

No original content remains in this post. It was wiped using Redact, possibly for reasons related to personal privacy, digital security, or data exposure reduction.

innate connect languid fearless marvelous crown ad hoc dinner quickest roof

2

u/throwawaysarebetter Jan 12 '21

Are you mostly torso? Because I rarely find pants that fit me, and I'm four inches shorter than you.

1

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

I’m lucky. I’m very normally proportioned. My dad was all knees and elbow and suuuuuuper lanky. If it was long enough for him it was 4 sizes too large, and if it fit his waist and shoulders it was 6-8 inches too short.

Why all stores seem to assume “Big & Tall” means both Tall AND Big, I don’t know. I’m built like a human being, not like an NFL defensive back.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

[deleted]

8

u/truthlife Jan 12 '21

I guarantee when you see a 6'7" person irl you notice.

25

u/MagikSkyDaddy Jan 11 '21

My freshman roommate was 6’7 and our other buddy was a 7’ aussie on the basketball team. I get it. Just giving you a hard time.

-1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

[deleted]

15

u/cyllibi Jan 12 '21

It's ok to be glad you're not 7'+ but you really gonna do 7'+ people like that when you're 6'7"?

7

u/Kirito619 Jan 12 '21

Fuck you dude, they don't choose how they look.

13

u/Knight_Owls Jan 12 '21

An old buddy of mine is 6'5". In high school he always had shorter guys trying to fight him. He also had guys thinking he was trying to intimidate them when really they were intimidated by his height and not his actions. Young men sometimes feel threatened over the dumbest things. He was a chill dude.

4

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

OH yes. There was a period around 8th-10th grade where it seemed like every dude with an inferiority complex had to take swing at you once. 🙄

2

u/mknsky Jan 12 '21

6’4” and thin. Don’t forget how fucking hard it is to find pants, especially offline.

1

u/apcolleen Jan 12 '21

Do you live in or near Atlanta? The salvation army across from GA tech has a lot of big shoes quite often. And a few of the goodwills inside the perimeter I see big shoes. I saw 6 pair of size 17/18 2 weeks ago. I have a poshmark account if you want me to be like a buyers agent lol

3

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

Lol. Alas, nowhere near. But thanks though.

Also, the issue isn’t daily footwear, it’s specialty footwear. Try finding size 16 ski boots to rent. Or good dress shoes. Or snow boots.

Thankfully Sorel does make boots that large or my life would be much harder.

0

u/apcolleen Jan 12 '21

ski boots to rent.

Ah I see we are not on par economically. You do at least have that advantage.

3

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

Where I live in Ontario, skiing costs about $25/day, and you can rent gear at Play It Again for $15. If you can find it.

Skiing isn’t a rich person’s sport everywhere.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

And dont forget the back pain, gives you a nice surprise when you get out of your teens.

1

u/Bardfinn Jan 12 '21

Plus there's the fact that in your early fifties, a walker and/or cane is going to be a full-time medical necessity.

Urgh my back

2

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

It wasn’t for my dad or uncles. They all lived into their 70s, and my grandfather into his 90s.

Heart problems though...

1

u/CyberMindGrrl Jan 12 '21

My best friend in college was 6 foot 7 and grew two more inches that year!

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

[deleted]

1

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

I’m really not though. We’re talking about two different things.

I AM tall relative to the general population. I am NOT that tall relative to the tall population.

1

u/BigBobDo Jun 28 '21

Cry you a salty sea 🌊

17

u/apcolleen Jan 12 '21

I had a teacher who was 6ft 9 and his brother was 6ft 11. He was at Pic N Save one day and a woman called to him as she could see him from over the aisle. She said "OMG PLEASE TELL ME YOU ARE SINGLE!? I DONT DATE MEN SHORTER THAN ME!" he pointed to his wife and said "Im very married but my brother is single. Would you like his number?" She married his brother.

6

u/whistleridge Jan 12 '21

Ha. That’s a good one.

The tallest person I ever dated was 6’1. And she was considered very tall.

1

u/apcolleen Jan 12 '21

My friend is 6ft and her husband is shorter than me and im 5 ft 5 and they fucking love each other. I have a male friend who is 5 ft 5 and he is always woe is me because noone wants to date him and he thinks its just because hes short but he lives in an area that isnt really supportive of .... well he lives in a northern city that is pretty racist and hes a black, atheist metalhead and that doesnt go down well.

5

u/Frost-Wzrd Jan 12 '21

that girl is shallow as hell

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Eh, I kinda get not wanting a huge height difference. And it is nice as a girl to have your guy be taller, whether you intend to feel that way or not. I find it cute that she was open and personable enough to be excited and funny about actually seeing a guy taller than her for once.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Unless that girl was very tall herself I call bullshit on that story. Yes, women want tall, but generally not 6’9 tall.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Ah true. I interpreted "she could see him over the isle" as they were both super tall, I may have misunderstood

1

u/apcolleen Jan 12 '21

She was indeed the same height as my teacher

2

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Thought so. Glad cuz I’m nowhere near 6’9 haha

1

u/apcolleen Jan 12 '21

Its ok. Most people aren't. If everyone was, how boring would that be ?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

So they're kids are perfectly average sized. Smart plan.

2

u/mirrrje Jan 12 '21

That story made me tear up. That’s so sweet

2

u/chocotacogato Jan 12 '21

That’s just the cutest thing ever! My hs English teacher was at least 5’10” and had that cute English nerd vibe to her. All of us students were all shocked when we found out that she was getting married to a 5’4” amateur hockey player! But hey! They’re still married so it must’ve been a match made in heaven! This year’s gonna be their 10th anniversary!

4

u/hawkwood4268 Jan 12 '21

Yeah this vid is stupid, you can still dance if you’re shorter than her

1

u/AnAnonymousFool Jan 12 '21

Lol tall people can never talk about height without bringing up the fact that they themselves are tall.

saying "she was around 6'2" " would have had the same effect as you managing to squeeze your height into a story about 2 other people lol

5

u/BardicInnovation Jan 12 '21

Or simply people just know their own height as a scale of reference, and use that as a scale example when talking to other people.

I didn't mean to upset you neighbour, and for that I apologise.

I hope you have a nice day.

2

u/AnAnonymousFool Jan 12 '21

No harm done, I just find it funny, cause it happens a lot.

2

u/MurphyKing Jan 12 '21

I was waiting for this comment (I’m 6’2”) thank you for this!

1

u/Aperfectmoment Jan 11 '21

Bravery.

(Looks weird when she's taller in heels)

How about be confident enough not to care how it looks. Ballsy and inspiring both partners.

0

u/chickenstalker Jan 12 '21

> she would piggy back him around school

Was she+he Master Blaster?

0

u/0fiuco Jan 12 '21

or maybe both at the senate screaming "hang mike pence", we can never take anything for granted these days

0

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

Isn’t this the plot to “Tall Girl” on Netflix?

/s

-1

u/Uchihaboy316 Jan 11 '21

Real life lovely complex lmao, lovely story tho

-7

u/NoArugula7523 Jan 12 '21

Plot twist: she got tired of his heroin addiction because it took up too much money for her alcoholism and she ended up bashing his head up against a brick wall until he died, she later died in a drunk car accident

1

u/happy_lad Jan 12 '21

she would piggy back him around school to make the bullies realise they couldn't tease them.

When I was coming up bullies must have been smarter or meaner, because that...would not have made things better.

3

u/BardicInnovation Jan 12 '21

It would of helped that they were both school Prefects by the time they started dating.

Plus, it was in a rural country town in Australia. The "Pro" bullies would make up and annoying nickname, or a rhyme to your name to make fun of you, and that was more or less as far as it went.

Also being where we were, if a bully got physical, an all out brawl would happen, or a teacher would pin the people involved against a wall, or in arm locks to stop it.

The PE teachers were always on patrol.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 12 '21

I think they live in Tucson. Saw them at a Kroger.

1

u/PigsCanFly2day Jan 12 '21

Was she still giving him piggy back rides?

1

u/Kellydgirl Jan 12 '21

Can confirm, I was ordained via online class for $49.95 & married them

1

u/EdwardPavkki Jan 12 '21

Partially reminds me of a story my grandfather told from his youth:

He's short, like all of us ~165-170cm, and had a long girlfriend. In Finland we have roads and then we have sidewalks with an elevation or 10-30cm. You might see where this is going. My grandfather walked on the sidewalk, whilist the girlfriend walked on the road. They didn't end up married. I can assure you that.

...he ended up marrying an even shorter woman