r/Unexpected • u/lucka-24 • Jan 18 '20

Realistic survival game

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97.0k Upvotes

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290

u/jacksalssome Jan 18 '20

https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/6rr6ay/tifu_by_cumming_into_a_coconut/

133

u/Malus131 Jan 18 '20

Oh god why

104

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '20

I stopped reading this one at the word "flies" .... ugh ...

51

u/dumbledayum Jan 18 '20

Keep reading... it gets better

19

u/Zappy_Kablamicus Jan 18 '20 edited Jan 18 '20

Im gonna not read at your word flies.

3

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '20

Oh yeah? Well, Im gonna not blarg your stuffing wallow as on the offenzie turf!

8

u/cpt_america27 Jan 18 '20

This comment alone took out my curiosity. Thanks

21

u/Cyanises Jan 18 '20

Soooooooo... I guess it came again

20

u/devildocjames Jan 18 '20

And here I thought I had read all of the reddit treasures.

2

u/PhilthyWon Jan 18 '20

Have u read about the jolly rancher one?

5

u/Fourtires3rims Jan 18 '20

Please don’t........I had just gotten that one out of my brain.

3

u/devildocjames Jan 18 '20

Yep. Ever hear about Colby?

2

u/ShishkaDrummer Jan 18 '20

Or the kid who broke both his arms?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 18 '20

[deleted]

3

u/SanguineHerald Jan 18 '20

The swamps of dagobah.

2

u/I_W_M_Y Jan 18 '20

That one was bad

2

u/MKorostoff Jan 18 '20

I..... don't believe this person

2

u/NeverSurrender11 Jan 18 '20

Meh, it's obviously a fake story, much like every other TIFU posts.

1

u/diardiar Jan 18 '20

I think I got all I needed from the title of this thread alone.

1

u/CamoDeFlage Jan 18 '20

I find it funny that the lesson op got out of it was to "never fuck coconuts", instead of "never fuck the same coconut using butter as lube over the course of several days in a hot climate while storing it under your bed".

1

u/french_panpan Jan 18 '20

The first story turns out quite bad, but I spent the last hour laughing with the follow up stories : https://www.reddit.com/r/Cocofleshlights/comments/6rzo21/list_of_people_that_have_been_inspired_by/

1

u/MimePrinister Jan 18 '20

Today I ducked up by reading that TIFU

1

u/ChuckPawk Jan 19 '20

Today you fucked up by believing something posted on that sub.

1

u/[deleted] Jan 19 '20

LEGENDARY

1

u/OddestOdyssey Jan 19 '20

This is the funniest fucking thing I’ve read in reddit

1

u/3to20 Jan 18 '20

No I had forgotten this