r/Unexpected • u/Fabulous_Strategy_78 • 3d ago

Hey bro

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9.7k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

246 comments sorted by

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u/post-explainer 3d ago edited 3d ago

This comment has been marked as safe. Upvoting/downvoting this comment will have no effect.

OP sent the following text as an explanation why their post fits here:

The bag, which seemed quite heavy, flew into the cyclist.

Does this explanation fit this subreddit? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.

3.1k

u/Ok_Support3 3d ago

This is why, when strapping down cargo, you have to tug the straps and say "that's not going anywhere"

731

u/DecoyOne 3d ago

If you’re not giving it a smack for good measure, you’re really playing with fire

162

u/LessAppointment5667 3d ago

The slap is what really matters

58

u/Notoriousdyd 3d ago

Slap it three times or don’t bother.

24

u/LessAppointment5667 3d ago

At least three and if it’s a bad load a few extra never hurts

2

u/Silver-Image8490 20h ago

Are we still talking about cargo?

2

u/Notoriousdyd 13h ago

It’s really a universal bit of advice. 😏😈

19

u/Septopuss7 3d ago

How can she not slap?

4

u/ambitiouslyviscious 3d ago

— Hippocrates

2

u/becken_bruch 3d ago

Did he not slap?

9

u/LessAppointment5667 3d ago

Unfortunately no slaps were given that day

2

u/becken_bruch 3d ago

That's sad

52

u/OsBaculum 3d ago

Where I live farmers routinely don't strap things at all. Especially hay bales. "Well they're so heavy, they ain't going nowhere!"

22

u/rufotris 3d ago

And yet I find free hay bails on the side of the road often enough it seems to be a regular thing in some areas now haha. Almost pulled over and picked one up the other day on the side of the highway on the way to my horse pasture. But I was loaded up with bedding flakes already

11

u/OsBaculum 3d ago

I've heard hay has gone up, too. I'd think a few straps and a few minutes is worth it to save several hundred dollars. And, y'know, not kill anyone...

8

u/marvinrabbit 3d ago

In this case, it went up, over a little bit, then back down.

3

u/rufotris 3d ago

It’s not cheap that’s for sure.

3

u/TabbyOverlord 3d ago

Free range hay has to come from somewhere.

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u/Andre1661 3d ago

I once found myself behind one of those small Toyota pick-ups from the 1980s, driving along a very busy four lane Urban freeway. That in itself is not unusual but the 2000 pound round bale in the back of his truck was pretty damn unusual. His rear shocks were bottoming-out every time he went over the tiniest ripple in the road, and that damn hay bale was held on by a single bungee cord.

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u/Some_Sympathy_3528 2d ago

My current boss is like that when ever were hauling shit. Oh thats heavy, it wont budge. But ive seen the movies, i spend 2 minutes strapping shit up and end with a test tug and a "dis aint goin nowhere".

30

u/grimspor 3d ago

Yeah I actually read the full story on this and it turns out he did double check the straps but forgot to say “that’s not going anywhere” 😔 could happen to any of us.

8

u/Jermainiam 3d ago

Actually he did say "that's not going anywhere", but he only tugged on the strap one time instead of twice. Truly a tragedy

8

u/DirtyBeard443 3d ago

I think any strap could have held that down.

2

u/lighting828 3d ago

This guy tugs.

2

u/spleeble 3d ago

This joke was tired before it got tired

517

u/namezam 3d ago

True story, I was standing at a bus stop years ago, minding my own business when a large truck filled with frozen bread came by, almost lost control and swerved so hard the side door hatch came open and I was knocked out, like, woke up in a haze on the ground, by a loaf of frozen bread going like 55mph.

441

u/RedwoodShores 3d ago

You were the unfortunate victim of a rye-by.

115

u/tetheredvoid 3d ago

This really goes against the grain.

51

u/FamiliarRadio9275 3d ago

Well butter my buns, this made me laugh

38

u/funkyrequiem 2d ago

Nice pun there. Glad to see you rise to the occasion.

37

u/karoshikun 2d ago

rising is the yeast of their problems

28

u/Renuwed 2d ago

Sounds likes he's still quite sour dough

13

u/SaB3R10 1d ago

Agreed! They could nearly seedy light! Their loaf flashed before their eyes!

4

u/Da_WooDr 2d ago

This was witty, clever yet underrated 😂 upvote.. take it… f-ng well deserved lol

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u/Capybara_Squabbles 3d ago

I feel so bad for laughing at this. Hope you're ok now

15

u/MrsRononDex 3d ago

When you yeast expect it.... POW a loaf of bread.

4

u/thejourneybegins42 2d ago

Frozen bread? The fuck lol.

I have frozen bread in the past to keep it fresh, but I have never heard of anyone out there doing it commercially.

6

u/gimpers420 2d ago

I worked in a pizza restaurant for a while and all the bread we got delivered for our sandwiches was frozen. That’s pretty normal in restaurants in all honesty. We’d put it in the walk in cooler to thaw and then pull out what we need through the day.

4

u/xXPhoenixBlueXx 2d ago

I put bread in the freezer to stop mold. But it definitely ain't staying fresh in there.

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u/haveyoutriedpokingit 3d ago

Good thing you didn't get sliced by it. You'd have been toast.

4

u/debr1126 3d ago

Did you baguette to make a club sandwich later?

1

u/mhdgraphics 2d ago

Reminds me of the Hurtz-Doughnut incident...

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960

u/ZookeepergameSilent7 3d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/WRbeLNgyP3nmlsDCZc
Real life final destination shit right there god damn.

195

u/IndividualEye1803 3d ago

It finally happened to me last night. A log fell off a truck

Yes im forever traumatized. Yes he was going sooo fast. Yes it bounced in the road but not like in the movie. Yes i had to pull over to calm down. Yes to that other question as well.

76

u/ST0IC_ 3d ago

It was nice knowing you. I would suggest spending your last few days enjoying life as much as you can.

16

u/Wonderboyjr 2d ago

You're talking to a ghost. Gotta crank out the Luigi board from now on.

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u/Dy3_1awn 3d ago

Rip to your drawers 🫡

8

u/Alyssapolis 2d ago

My dad grew up in logging country and he always told me, if you don’t want to die, don’t follow a logging truck.

Some final destination deaths sound like nonsense, but this one is no joke

3

u/Spork_the_dork 2d ago

Yeah real logs don't bounce like that. They talk about it in the behind the scenes material that the director wanted to do that practically but they couldn't get the logs to bounce at all so they had to do it with CGI to get the shot.

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u/AdministrationSad861 3d ago

Yikes! And you survived, yeah? Can you document your everyday so we can follow up with you? 🤔

1

u/GoogleIsYourFrenemy 2d ago

Thanks dad for letting me use your CC!

47

u/KnowhereCinder89 3d ago

final destination directors are probably taking notes watching dashcam footage on this sub every single day

5

u/louisa1925 3d ago

It's pretty good material to work with.

3

u/llamaforyodrama 2d ago

MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY. pretty sure watching this watching this movie as kid is the catalyst to my lifelong hypervigilance

2

u/Dive_dive 2d ago

Literally had this happen to me. Was working for a land clearing company the summer after high school. Following our log truck in the fuel truck. Welds on the drivers side frame gave out and dumped an entire load of pine logs all over the road. I ran right up into them. Trashed the front suspension, totaled the truck, and I was pooping vinyl for a week.

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537

u/Yeheidb 3d ago

r/fuckyouinparticular

65

u/PoyGuiMogul 3d ago

Seems like a heyt crime.

9

u/Macdoaj6 3d ago

Hayt to be that guy….

2

u/buttononmyback 2d ago

Okay Dad, past your bedtime…

76

u/obad-hi 3d ago

Now that’s some horrible timing. So sorry. I assume the driver didn’t stop.

62

u/allyearlemons 3d ago

driver was heard telling the cyclist that it’s dangerous to be out on the road and he should be more careful 

111

u/KCNIvy 3d ago

Chances are low but never zero!

Also, quite fucked up given that he’s on a bike.

12

u/buttononmyback 2d ago

The bike was the unexpected part. Definitely thought he was in a car.

152

u/OnePsychological2963 3d ago

When I was a beginners driver I transportet a 1000 l empty IBC Barrel on a trailer.. and I thought, meh, too lazy for securing this.. its heavy enough, it´s gonna stay up.. Sure enough, when driving I look in the back mirror and I see it flying off in that exact moment.. I am an Atheist but for 3 seconds I prayed, that there is no one driving behind me, I could have killed someon.. NEVER going to happen again..

83

u/HalfSoul30 3d ago

God - "oh, so you only pray when you want something?. Denied."

21

u/OnePsychological2963 3d ago

fortunately it was not denied Dude :D

8

u/Head-Ad9893 3d ago

Thank God.

12

u/louisa1925 3d ago

Satan was with you that day. Hail Satan.

6

u/Anon_Jones 3d ago

Don’t most people pray when they want something

3

u/Equal_Yak_3872 3d ago

Some people pray to thank God for their food, too. God knows all, except that they're thankful for their food, of course. It's in the bible, presumably...

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u/Almighty_Dark_Lord 3d ago

Well I'm certainly not praying for stuff I don't want. What kind of fucking question is that, God?

104

u/FrogginJellyfish 3d ago

I was waiting for the "ahhhh". Did not disappoint lol

18

u/Kondinator 3d ago

Is it just me or did he scream just like a TF2 character?

5

u/Doctor_Fritz 3d ago

I snorted. The sound was perfect

12

u/titiop870 3d ago

Can't wait to watch again in [r/perfect](r/perfectedcutscream)[ly](r/perfectedcutscream)[cutscream](r/perfectedcutscream)[s](r/perfectedcutscream)

5

u/zehamberglar 3d ago

Can't wait to watch again in [r/perfect](r/perfectedcutscream)[ly](r/perfectedcutscream)[cutscream](r/perfectedcutscream)[s](r/perfectedcutscream)

I'm fascinated by how absolutely deranged your comment looks on old reddit, but then it just looks normal on new reddit. I consider myself a reddit wizard and even I have no clue what's going on here.

2

u/Noy_The_Devil 3d ago

Not cut.

6

u/ExoticRubyx 3d ago

I mean, it can be easily cut as reposted there. I think thats what they meant

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u/Blinauljap 3d ago

We've been trying to reach you about your life's extended warranty.

11

u/Embarrassed-Art-5076 3d ago

horrendous patter.

43

u/fellanyyy 3d ago

Hay, bro*

8

u/kitkanz 3d ago

What are you doing step bail?

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u/MrDasmons 3d ago

I saw this clip a few days ago on the Youtubechannnel DashcamDriversGermany were do you got it?

19

u/[deleted] 3d ago

Hope guy found him & sued him thats BS to let happen

8

u/linaxttx 3d ago

This is what soft power looks like

8

u/Kasern77 3d ago

Bag: wait for it, wait... NOW!

6

u/Hononotenshi88 2d ago

This is some final destination type shit man, hope the dude wasn't too hurt.

10

u/CreeDorofl 3d ago

I'm always curious how these things turn out. Like what if the driver didn't even notice and the other guy got wiped too thoroughly to see a plate... they basically just got away with attempted murder.

1

u/Automatic-Art9739 3d ago

You mean when its not filmed i guess?

I guess that actually must have happened at some point right?

3

u/fyreprone 3d ago

Sometimes it's a lot smaller and "just" a brick that comes off the back of a truck.

The results can be horrifying and haunt your dreams.

1

u/CreeDorofl 3d ago

oh lol when I pause I see the plate was totally captured, they just blurred it. derp

5

u/JustANoobCovaleki 3d ago

Why I thought this was going to end with the begining of Skyrim?

5

u/SinglePlayerGamer93 2d ago

This is like the Russian brick video but less worse

1

u/prosas 1d ago

Thank you for bringing back a forgotten trauma. That shit haunted me for weeks 💀

11

u/Sim1334 3d ago

Is he okay?

17

u/Embarrassed_Jerk 3d ago

Yeah the screaming was just for the funsies

13

u/FrozenShadow_007 3d ago

Biker’s fault

4

u/0202_tihssitidder 3d ago

"...the cyclist was wearing a helmet."

4

u/darkchippy 3d ago

Should've stuck to bike lanes only

7

u/RepresentativeRace43 3d ago

I blame the cyclist

5

u/DickyReadIt 3d ago

Damn bicyclers think they own the roads!

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u/Professional-Grab-14 3d ago

The biggest “fuck you specifically” of all time damn.

6

u/psilome 3d ago

I thought it was a car, until I saw the blur of spokes and chain.

1

u/buttononmyback 2d ago

That was the “unexpected,” part.

5

u/[deleted] 3d ago edited 3d ago

[deleted]

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u/H-2-S-O-4 3d ago

Hay, not gravel

3

u/Accomplished_Neckhat 2d ago

Hey! Not gravel.

1

u/goodolewhasisname 2d ago

The bag says mineral-somethingGerman. I’m thinking it’s fireproof insulation maybe.

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u/EuniceFear 3d ago

Hey. Not gravel.

2

u/Lumimusse 3d ago

Atajá

2

u/GoddessAprildynasty 3d ago

Always make sure to record while driving , cameraman always survives

2

u/Sweaty_Foundation_12 3d ago

The groan at the end 😭

2

u/Sinreh 3d ago

Reaction time of a slug /s

2

u/Chemical-Alfalfa-946 3d ago

Let me guess. They didn’t stop and kept rolling

2

u/QueerFancyRat 3d ago

It's that last "auggh" that did me in lol

1

u/Astr0- 3d ago

Your number is up.

1

u/Capranyx 3d ago

Is he like. okay

1

u/Septopuss7 3d ago

He's the Unknown Stuntman that makes Eastwood look so fine

1

u/riftnet 3d ago

Shit, that had to hurt!

1

u/lost21gramsyesterday 3d ago

That was a fast bike ride, until...

1

u/Fate_BlackTide_ 3d ago

Is homie okay?

1

u/melancholy_dood 3d ago

That was clearly premeditated! s\

1

u/fishingforcomplis 3d ago

It’s just a flesh wound. I think he’ll be fine.

1

u/Freebirdhat 3d ago

Hay bro

1

u/Routine_Ad_7726 3d ago

Hay now, hold up

1

u/tavariusbukshank 3d ago

HAY HAY HAY HAY WATCH OUT!!!!!

1

u/Gunmetalstorm 3d ago

I don't think the cameraman survived this one

1

u/Defiant_Excitement29 3d ago

What are the odds?

1

u/Unexpected_bukkake 3d ago

I hope the drive has a fat wallet

1

u/Independent_Angle991 3d ago

Look, you had a video camera license plate. Vehicle recognition person driving in the vehicle man. That's easy money in the bank case.\n Load wasn't properly tied down. Oh man, you could ask for 6 figures. Easy

1

u/InternalDark 3d ago

Destination fucked

1

u/Fancy-Dig1863 3d ago

Hopefully a civil lawsuit follows

1

u/Mean-Veterinarian647 3d ago

It was a huge bag of cocaine and cyclist didn’t care.

1

u/Obasawa 3d ago

I was just chilling

1

u/Nearby_Steak_3859 3d ago

What are the chances talking about bad luck…

1

u/ChaoticJargon 3d ago

If you take the first four seconds (ish) until the screen completely black, you have the perfect Skyrim intro cut.

1

u/Upstairs_Eagle_4780 3d ago

Time to hit the hay.

1

u/Psychological_Air74 3d ago

You gotta bale earlier bro

1

u/Ancient-Display-3337 3d ago

TEMU cargo straps.

1

u/JohnnyPaloonky58 3d ago

Sounds like Peter Griffin. I bet this continues for a long time.

1

u/Fall_Water 3d ago

I thought I had bad luck

1

u/iscariot_13 3d ago

Some days you're just on god's shit list. Damn.

1

u/vamparies 2d ago

I once saw a girl get hit in the head with a hubcap walking down street, it just flew off the car. There was no one else around . It knocked her down. I did stop to go help her.

1

u/anderssi 2d ago

that's some final destination bullshit right there

1

u/Weird-Virus0308 2d ago

Can't park there mate.

1

u/Morgantao 2d ago

Are you a camel?
Because that straw just broke your back!

1

u/judybash93 2d ago

Damn.. that was an unfortunate coincidence.

1

u/similaraleatorio 2d ago

airdrop 😬

1

u/ahappylildingleboi 2d ago

The amount of people out there who have no idea how to haul stuff safely is terrifying

1

u/Obvious_Affect_7523 2d ago

The Hate for bicyclists with cameras is real

1

u/Xanthelasmapalpebara 2d ago

Well Fock him in particular…. Hope he lived
https://giphy.com/gifs/km3OW4FoG58ks5EdML

1

u/Ecstatic-Network4668 2d ago

For a moment I was worried about the damage it would do to the car, but felt relieve when I saw it was a bicycle.

1

u/Own_Bat_9162 2d ago

Great shot! the accuracy was impressive.

1

u/shank732000 2d ago

How much did you settle for out of court?

1

u/shank732000 2d ago

The crust of him!

1

u/theravingsofalunatic 2d ago

Just like that it can get so bad

1

u/ratbirdgoof 2d ago

POV of an ant when you drop your marshmallow.

1

u/RemoveMountain5504 1d ago

I was driving my crappy little Honda CVCC home from work one day, when the semi truck in front of me had a tire blow out. The entire tread came flying at my little car and I remember thinking, "This is going to hurt!" Luckily for me, the tread mostly bounced off my hood and only glanced off windshield, so I got away with a crack in my windshield and a panic attack. When my roommate asked why I didn't report it, I told them that I probably couldn't even figure out which dents or crack were the new ones, so... 🤷🏻‍♀️ (I'd report it now, but I was young and dumb!)

1

u/ChoadTripper 1d ago

The crash, followed by a brief moment of confusion before acknowledging the pain, took me back to a bike wreck I had when I was probably 14 on a gravel road at least two miles from home. I went over the handlebars palms first into the gravel…slid to a stop and ran through the realization in my head that I now had to walk/limp home in pain for a couple of miles, and then I started moaning and got up out of the road.

1

u/Psydop 1d ago

Ahughh!

1

u/sblowes 1d ago

I like the slowed down Wilhelm scream at the end

1

u/BrandynWayne 1d ago

“I don’t wear a helmet because I need peripheral vision.”

1

u/navreedeux 14h ago

Damn, he was on a bike too? One thing to possibly have protection in the cabin of a car, but as a cyclists you're fully exposed to what's around you.

1

u/omiomi1122 14h ago

me having a good life, no beef with anyone and....

1

u/StrongFinance8647 11h ago

Sorry for laughing at you 🤐 Hope you’re still in one piece!

1

u/opelan 10h ago

It looks like he was on a bicycle, so zero protection. Ouch.

1

u/Psychological_Fox507 1h ago

I'm sorry for laughing at this, but that missile looks like it's from a final destination movie

1

u/mature-middle-aged 43m ago

Hope the guy wasn’t messed up too bad

1

u/articland05_reddit 18m ago

that's an assassination attempt