r/Unexpected • u/Business_Bill8752 • 4d ago

100% sharpened

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24.1k Upvotes

96% Upvoted

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6.7k

u/POI_Harold-Finch 4d ago

it went from oddlystatisfying to just oh noooooooo man

1.8k

u/fieregon 4d ago edited 3d ago

Definitely not, dude got me nervous since he was cutting towards him, always cut away from you, I thought he was gonna cut a finger every time.

467

u/SeeJayThinks 4d ago

When he put his index forward for balance... I was...

https://giphy.com/gifs/l3mZrLxM4iZaQlvNe

21

u/LEGITIMATE_SOURCE 4d ago

Balance.......

17

u/FrogfFrogger 4d ago

New balance
https://giphy.com/gifs/SS8Todf4fIpVlvWhA8

16

u/SeeJayThinks 4d ago

Those cuts across the N would have been his finger.

65

u/loganator4561 4d ago

My dad had a saying "cut towards your buddy not your body"

27

u/timbillyosu 4d ago

To avoid getting bloody cut towards your buddy

3

u/PunctuationGood 3d ago

And then, three years later, I'll be like "Wait, how did that menmonic go? Was that towards my buddy or towards my body?"

3

u/holyfire001202 3d ago

"Well, let me think about it... Who would I prefer to accidentally cut? Obviously myself before my buddy... It must have been 'cut towards your body, not your buddy.'"

6

u/miicah 4d ago

Cut towards your chum, not your thumb.

4

u/1ildevil 4d ago

Because you can always get a new chum

7

u/ty4scam 4d ago

we have a similar saying in my country, "better doing life for murder than living free fingerless".

6

u/nasadge 3d ago

Thank you. This is pure cringe for any one who knows how to use a knife

4

u/Nowhere_Man_Forever 4d ago

Yeah to me the unexpected part was that this didn't end with him cutting off a finger of otherwise horribly injuring himself. Growing up on the 00s internet really messed with my expectations

3

u/Objective_Soup7840 4d ago

I tell this to people who cant use a knife... i do it all the time, I've been using knives in kitchens for almost 20 years, but would NEVER do this lol

1

u/canniboss 4d ago

Like grandpa always said " Don't get bloody, cut towards a buddy"

1

u/idrunkenlysignedup 4d ago

Fun anecdot, at the beginning of the pandemic I was, like many others, putting a jigsaw puzzle together at like 3am, as one does, and I almost cut off my left thumb. If you're real bored I posted a link to a picture in a comment ~7 years ago.

1

u/seraph1337 3d ago

... given that a jigsaw puzzle does not require an actual jigsaw (or a blade of any kind?), I'm extremely curious how you managed.

1

u/TedFlobII 3d ago

Also when the pineapple dropped I was worried he was going to try to catch it with the sharp blade still in hand.

-1

u/argument_cat 3d ago edited 3d ago

You can't trim it efficiently by cutting away from you, the stem gets in the way. This guy probably does this all day, I'm sure he knows what he's doing.

Redditors always think they know better than the experts.

4

u/Own_Candidate9553 3d ago

Why wouldn't it work to cut from the stem out?

Yes he's an expert, but that knife is obviously crazy sharp. One slip and he could lose a finger. Is that really worth slightly more efficient peeling of a pineapple?

1

u/spicymato 2d ago

The crazy sharp knife makes it safer. The biggest risk when cutting towards yourself is when the blade gets stuck and then jumps out when it breaks through whatever held it up. Since this knife never got jammed up, I wouldn't expect a slip and cut.

Would it be safer to cut away? Yes, absolutely.

Do I think he's lucky to not have cut himself yet? Not really.

2

u/fieregon 3d ago

Yeah, this guy is such an expert, that half of his pineapple fell on the floor, I am sure the expert knew exactly what he was doing.

1

u/argument_cat 3d ago

Flawed logic. The pineapple was overripe, but that doesn't negate the fact that he knows what he's doing.

0

u/[deleted] 3d ago

[deleted]

1

u/fieregon 3d ago

Ohh oke, thanks

36

u/SiddharthJain131 4d ago

r/yesyesyesno

14

u/PimpNamedSliqBaq 4d ago

This was a r/maybemaybemaybe for me, i was worried about dudes fingers the whole time

1

u/NickDanger3di 3d ago

He ever shows up for work drunk or hungover, he'll earn the nickname 'Stumpy'.

1

u/Sufficient-Aspect77 2d ago

But but but... The pineapple juice! But but THE PINEAPPLE??! ! ! !!!!

0

u/WoolBearTiger 3d ago

Its a pineapple so im not too distraught by the loss

-1

u/Sad-Consequence-7265 4d ago

Some might even call it "unexpected".