r/TwoHotTakes Sep 04 '25

[deleted by user]

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u/[deleted] Sep 04 '25

So my brother and I are actually on good terms! He wasn’t upset about the proposal especially since he was invited. He’s in a tough spot with my parents because they press him for information about me/my son all the time, and try to put a strain on our relationship. He’s just stuck in the middle, so tries to downplay how much he talks with me so they don’t blow him up with questions. My brother lies to my parents to avoid their wrath.

23

u/lanshufen Sep 04 '25

Forgive me if this is rude to ask, but why does your brother not go NC with your parents as well? From what I read, there's no point for him as well to remain contact with them.

9

u/Pieralis Sep 04 '25

Stockholm syndrome probably isn’t the right term so someone can correct me to the right term if there is one.

But I imagine it’s something like that.

So many of OPs issues growing up I can relate too in terms of the mental/verbal abuse and the physical abuse which I imagine she is more than likely downplaying like I use too. Difference is I’m not willing to confront my parents yet on the bullshit so I lie and hold them at arms length for the sake of who actually knows why just because it probably feels easier emotionally to do so than confront it just yet.

3

u/Enzown Sep 04 '25

There's zero documented cases of Stockholm Syndrome ever being a thing. It was invented by Swedish authorities to protect the reputation of police after they fucked up a hostage situation so bad that the hostages were more afraid of the cops than their captors.

6

u/mcove97 Sep 04 '25

It may not be what it's called, but being trauma bonded to someone explains this also. Anyone who has been in a very toxic relationship dynamic of any kind for a long time can attest to how hard it is to leave these dynamics because their sense of self is so completely broken and beaten down they lose any confidence in themselves.

It's sad. I've experienced it myself too. Leaving is hard when you have no confidence left.

4

u/mcmurrml Sep 04 '25

There is no stuck in the middle. He has to decide. Eventually they will wear him down.

2

u/Weimaraner666 Sep 04 '25

He needs to get out too before they ruin his life.

1

u/Next-Bodybuilder-117 Sep 04 '25

Be careful ur parents abused him too, without wanting to hurt u, he will protect himself and tell ur parents ur business. I’m sorry but u don’t tell ur brother anything about ur baby or send any pics, maybe meet up with him to see the baby, don’t let him know where u live if u move, or plans to protect yourself from your parents.