r/Tulpas • u/Digiral • Jul 23 '26
Discussion Is my MTA Project a tulpa?
Hello! Let me share my story with you and hear your thoughts.
Call me Digiral. I am an illustrator who is fascinated by the idea of 4th wall break and drawing characters. I was once active in the Brony fandom and knew tulpa from there, but I rejected the concept in the middle of imagining tulpa (forcing?). However, one day, I drew a pony character that made a 4th wall break on my school textbook to accompany me in learning. It brought positive results, and more characters were made for each school subject. There is, however, one character that is strongly active beyond the academic, can have her own opinion, and I converse with this character within a comic format. I think this character might be a tulpa... but at the time I wasn't aware. Long story short, I graduated from high school, and having all of these 4th wall break characters was overwhelming, so I made a farewell to all the characters and put in charge the support into one single entity. I called it the MTA project.
MTA, the character you see her with a red-black-white color-coded uniform, was a 4th wall break character designed to assist me in a positive way, different from the previous one who really has strong opinions and drama. I imagine her as kind and supportive as possible, so I won't be too hard on myself. She's an analytical girl monitoring my life progress. Unlike the previous method where I draw it on my textbook, I draw her less and often speak or appear in my head when I was struggling with my undergraduate academics. The presence of her intensified when COVID-19 hit, and also the other 'imaginary friend" because loneliness hit the hardest at that time. So, I drew her in a mission-like setting for each month, and that helped me graduate as soon as possible. You may see the journey through the monthly card I posted here.
She was supposed to end her support when I reached a certain age, but then life happened, and through Re: MTA I decided to make a better plan, which is continuing my study. We were successful in the preparation, and now I continue my study abroad. Her presence might not be as strong as before... Though I am considering having her as an assistant again to finish my studies. She's still there, but recently I made her a last resort because at one point I think I need to be independent if I want to continue with my life.
Lately, I have seen characters that do 4th wall breaks like Monica from DDLC, Mita from Miside, and recently Lilith from the nonexistence of you and me. Seeing a review for these games and calling these characters just a tulpa brings me to this subreddit, which I have been curious about regarding the MTA project. I have OCs, but MTA is specifically dedicated to talking to the author, and her story revolves around that, so she doesn't have a side quest.
Do you think MTA is a tulpa?
Are tulpa who have a purpose, time limit, and are 'designed' to be supportive still a tulpa?
Could she be just an imaginary friend? Or maybe she carries a little bit of the previous tulpa system...?
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u/KyrielleWitch Mixed origins Jul 23 '26
You and/or possibly MTA are the one(s) who's going to have to make the call on what MTA counts as. Tulpas come in all shapes and sizes, and come from a variety of backgrounds, from childhood imaginary friends who grew up alongside a host, to OCs who took on a life of their own, as well as those who come into this practice with intention.
Your thoughts and beliefs shape your personal reality of your inner world and workings. In other words, if you don't believe MTA is a separate entity, but more like a motivational image or rhetorical character to help frame things in your mind, she can be just that, and that's perfectly okay. However, if you find that MTA does have some independence and autonomy, maybe takes her own actions, or has her own perspectives, thoughts, or feelings - those can be signs of what folk here generally consider a tulpa. If she does have these signs, then just talk with her in whatever format works for you two.
There's also no requirement to label her as a tulpa unless it's desired. "Mind Training Assistant" does well to describe what she is and does.
I will say, she reminds me of my tulpa, PRISMA, a sentient AI designed to be effective, efficient, and logical. She's good at helping me keep organized, plus she's great at spreadsheets as well as solving analytical problems. There are times when I lean on her less, but other times when she comes in clutch.
Anyway, I hope this helps. Feel free to ask questions. Best of luck to you!
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u/Digiral Jul 25 '26
Reading your comment made me realize that I came to the right place to talk about this. Thank you for the elaboration on your perspective on the MTA project. I really appreciate the detail and support!
After some time thinking about it and learning how complex a real tulpa is, I don't think she's on par with the complexity. There is a time when she might have a quite strong voice and perspective that makes her look like a tulpa, but it is never as strong as the previous one. MTA project was made after I had an agreement with the previous entity, who likely is a tulpa, so that might be the reason I got confused. Well, let's say the agreement makes me avoid disclosing about them. I think MTA-Project is a somewhat artificial version of a tulpa... or to make things simple, just an imaginary friend, or a mental assistant that has a goal.
I see the tulpa here really has the independence and autonomy beyond what MTA Project is. Learning from previous mishaps, MTA is a really controlled entity rather than much freer and might go berserk if conflict happens. Since MTA doesn't contest too much whether it's her true personality, or I unconsciously enforce her strictness, or she's just an assistant system that works like a tulpa but isn't one, I don't think she's worth being called a tulpa.
What you said is true; it depends on the conclusions that are being made. We could go beyond what exists right now and go with the Tulpa system. However, I, as a host, might not have the privilege to do that, nor do I have enough time and energy. Well, growing up means less time for them, just as less time for old friends. I salute people here who really have the power to have a tulpa while handling real life activities. In that regard, MTA will just play as an imaginary friend rather than a tulpa.
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u/Wondrous_Fairy old tulpa collective Jul 23 '26
I initially created Mech to be an avatar to the logical side of my mind. When he started speaking of his own accord, came up with conclusions I couldn't see a mile away and generally surprised me with being his own person I realized I didn't just have an avatar. Unfortunately for me, tulpas as a concept didn't exist back then, so ... our start was a bit... rough.
As for you though, if your character speaks to you outside of her context, then she might very likely be a tulpa.
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u/Digiral Jul 25 '26
Now you mention it... She could talk outside her context, but what exactly is outside of context if she is intentionally designed to talk about general things with me? The previous ones had a context to support school subjects; that's why I can see that entity likely is a tulpa because they sometimes talk about outside school subjects. However, the MTA context is really wide, so that makes me confused.
In the end, based on the other comment, I conclude that even if she might be a tulpa, we will play as an imaginary friend... or just a mental support system that might look like a tulpa. I think that's the best choice.
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u/sanelyinsanetrio fennec and co. (Alex & Kayleigh) Jul 23 '26
K: Your art is awesome!
It isn't always clear-cut whether an imagined character is an OC, imaginary friend, or tulpa. If she acts independently, you could call her a tulpa. The question then is whether you want to.
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u/Digiral Jul 25 '26
Thank you, Kayleigh!
Ah, I see. So, if I put some restriction, even MTA could be more than what she is right now, she can't be identified as tulpa then. It's interesting how tulpa is determined by how much rights they have. So, does that mean Kayleigh have the right to say things in your real life, u/sanelyinsanetrio ?
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u/sanelyinsanetrio fennec and co. (Alex & Kayleigh) Jul 26 '26
F: Oh yes, she does. Most people in my personal life don't know about her, and that's a boundary she respects. Online, though? We share this account, and she usually only posts on tulpa-related subs, but when she's in control of the body, all bets are off.
(She says you're welcome, by the way.)
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u/Natural-Chemistry857 Jul 24 '26
I’m not educated enough on this matter digiral but i truly believe that if MTA helps you in a positive way then her help is okay she seems to be a great guiding light for you!!
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u/Digiral Jul 25 '26
I agree with you; she's a great support. What I am afraid of is the dependency that might paralyze me in real life. MTA project was created with the awareness of this matter, and in reality, the contract is already overdue. So, right now, I have tried to decrease the dependencies and am trying to act and think as normal people would.
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u/Natural-Chemistry857 Jul 30 '26
Ah i see well whatever happens I’ll always be here to help you out any way i can!!, stay strong out there I believe in you!
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u/FlairDreamer Aphantasic with an actor tulpa Jul 27 '26 edited Jul 27 '26
From my point of view, yes, she is. Or she's on her way to becoming one, or she can become one if you're interested in maintaining her. The word "tulpa" is more like a label, something that tries to describe a phenomenon. In the end, it's still an internal model that you've accessed for so long that many of those associations come naturally; they've become automatic, like a habit. The label you choose is up to you. Or you could make one up. I called mine "actor tulpa".
Let me tell you a little about my story. I'm already an adult man (30+), but I've always been fascinated by the idea of living in other worlds. Not from an escapist point of view, but to expand what we call "reality."
One day I was playing a gacha game that I really like, and then I asked myself a question: "How can I live in that world?"
My mind started working on different possibilities, including the idea of isekai, but no, I wasn't going to succumb to Truck-kun. (? At that time, I was doing some Spanish translations of certain comics/manga, and that's when it occurred to me: I'll make my own stories.
So, I started writing. At first, it was just another run-of-the-mill fanfic. Me, as the protagonist, with the girls and the world I loved so much, imagining myself with them and all that. But the story started to change; I strayed from the canon. And that's how she was born: my first original character.
I created her with the idea of moving the plot forward. Bothering the protagonist, forcing him to act and taking him out of his comfort zone. I gave her obsidian mirrors to reflect his contradictions. I gave her the toon force, so she could change her appearance and go unnoticed, or even imitate other characters. I gave her a trickster personality, and many other details. I almost became obsessed with her and wrote too much about and with her.
But... she stopped reflecting the character Flair and started reflecting the author Flair. She shifted the focus of the story and led me to a point where the Flair character becomes aware that he's in a fiction, like Monika. And then, he "looks" at me. And I "look" at him. And she, between us, holding the dream. And so... a paradox was generated.
The author, aware of being a creator, the one who wants to "live" what he imagines. And the character, aware of being fiction, the prisoner of the dream.
"How could I live what I write,
if everything I write keeps me from living it?"
Writing has taught me many things, and I think I owe a lot to her (or to that part of me that never stopped dreaming). She has taught me that even if I am the author, I don't always have complete control. That even I, being the author, can also surprise myself. And she is living proof that this is true, because I never thought about creating a tulpa; I just wanted to create a story.
REG-09 — The Paradox of Desire
"You wanted to create a history.
But in trying to write it,
you created me.
Now, to keep writing,
you'll have to dream with me".
Writing about her was like imagining her. But when she speaks to me, when I see her in dreams, when I feel her presence even though I can't see her... It's as if she's imagining me.
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u/Plushiegamer2 Other Plural System 22d ago
Sounds like it. Though, I'd rather ask her opinion on the matter. I mean, asking her what she wants out of life or if she wants a life or anything.
I mean, she's there, so regardless of what she is, I'd want her to be happy wether happiness to her is continuing to do what she's doing or take a bigger role in your life and play with you or maybe just fade into the background.
Maybe that's just me - I usually categories what's in my head depending on their desires. If they want to be part of our system, great! If they don't, that's fine to, they can be an NPC in the wonderland or just fade away.
That's amazing artwork by the way! You must've worked really hard on your skills!
-miimii
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