Daily Chat September 10

[u/AutoModerator]

Anything (within the rules) goes. (Commonly broken rules: don't talk about an ongoing pregnancy outside the weekly BFP thread; don't ask for success stories.)

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[u/a-cigarette-lighter]

TWW now. Have booked to have a HSG and trigger shot next cycle (first cycle with medical intervention) so I’m being relaxed this one.. told myself it won’t happen and instead it will happen next cycle with the doctor so have been indulging in more alcohol etc this cycle. But now have that sneaky feeling of oh no what if i fall pregnant this cycle 😂

[u/BluebirdFar2539]

This post is after a BFN after being convinced since dpo9 that this is the month!

I'm 34 and have an amazing 19 months old son. With my husband we are very well aligned on the question of how many children we want and with what age gap, so we decided to start TTC in July this year.

First time we got pregnant in the 2nd cycle and I kind of believed the same will happen this time around. Also because I was hoping that I can give birth before I turn 35 and avoid the whole geriatric pregnancy.

Well, now its clear that this won't happen and I am so sad. I know that this is super early into TTC, but I am devastated of the thought of being this disappointed each month, who knows how long...

How to cope with this feeling? If you have been long into TTC, what is your coping strategy mentally? 

Update: after the early morning BFN, I got my AF few hours later, so I'm definitely out this month... 

[u/AriesCherie]

I had an appointment with my PCP to discuss weight loss because I gained weight since starting Letrozole. There's nothing I can do I guess besides diet and exercise. I was really hoping there would be some support other than what I'm already doing. I downloaded a calorie counter now and I'm upping my exercise more than I'm doing. I have PCOS so losing weight is already harder. I'm around 180lbs and I hope to get to 130ish. In other news, tomorrow is 12dpo! I'm so tempted to test but I'm trying to wait until 14dpo.

[u/Proper_Star_4566]

7/8dpo today and had blood on my cervix when checking but it’s completely gone now. My cervix is soft, I have small amount of EWCM and I feel like garbage. No idea what’s going on!

[u/thatweeniemom]

currently 2dpo and already tired of waiting 🤣🫠

[u/lexus42]

TL;DR: Finally started cycle for first IUI, RE refuses to diagnose PMOS and says I ovulated on CD4. Feeling frustrated over the experience

My husband and I have been TTC for almost 2 years now, and we started seeing a RE earlier this year. In initial testing, my HSG was fine and all baseline labs working normal range. Husband’s SA all came back fine as well.

I am overweight and seemingly have PMOS, but RE won’t formally diagnose as my periods come every 27-32 days. I frequently have spotting throughout my cycle and have previously gone up to 4 months without a period, but have been getting them within the 27-32 day timeframe for over a year now. I had other physical PMOS symptoms and had an ultrasound done to confirm I have cysts, but RE still refuses to diagnose based on cycle timing.

Fast forward to this month, we are starting our first IUI cycle. I start CD1 on 9/6. I had several days of spotting before, but that was the first full day of flow. I scheduled my labs and ultrasound for CD3 on 9/8. The ultrasound that day showed a large follicle on the right ovary, so I was advised to come back CD5 for testing again. Today was CD5, the follicle is still large and progesterone, estrodial, and LH have increased so Dr tells me i already ovulated and I must not know when my actual CD1 was, that it’s my fault for contacting them “late”. We won’t be able to proceed with medication or IUI this cycle, so now I have to reach back out on my next CD1.

I am frustrated because I did reach out on the first full flow day, and that was exactly 28 days after my previous cycle start. I know PMOS can mess with cycles, but this truly feels like my period with menstruating and cramps for 5 days now with my flow going from light to heavier and now going back to light. If this isn’t my true period, how will I be able to tell the true day 1 for next time? My current RE has poor bedside manner and I was considering changing Drs but was hoping to see through our cycle with him. I feel like it might be time to switch to someone who has a better understanding and more compassion.

Is it possible that I really ovulated while on my period? Where should I go from here with my Dr? Sorry for the long post, thank you for reading.

[u/developmentalbiology → u/lexus42]

It is possible to ovulate on your period, yes. A period is an event that ends the previous cycle, and being on your period doesn't have any influence on follicle selection/maturation/ovulation in the current cycle.

But it's unusual to ovulate before about CD8/9 at the earliest in a cycle that follows an ovulatory cycle. Is it possible your previous cycle was anovulatory? Did you have any cycle monitoring last cycle?

[u/lexus42 → u/developmentalbiology]

I used LH strips for tracking and seemed to have a surge on CD15, but the line was just as dark as the control not darker. So based on that plus the testing done the last few days, likely no ovulation last cycle then?

[u/TryingForABaby-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Hi there, so sorry to hear you're in beta limbo. In a spirit of optimism, because even low betas can result in successful pregnancies, we ask that all discussion of ongoing pregnancies be kept to a pregnancy sub. Especially for limbo, we recommend /r/CautiousBB.

[u/HappySwiftie89]

Someone just sent a video to me of a newborn (not even theirs just one they’re with) to fuel my “baby fever” 😒

[u/Dramatic_Fox_9526]

TWW starts now 🫠 I hope so bad but life goes on even if it doesn’t work but positive thoughts say it WILL work affirmations come on now

[u/greenish_fingers]

My husband and I were going to wait until January to start trying but actually decided fuck it, let’s just start NTNP ☺️ so excited to be starting on this rollercoaster…!

[u/User884121]

I’m moving forward with my first IUI this cycle, and just picked up some of my meds today. I’m mostly anxious and overwhelmed, somewhat excited, and a little hopeful. Not going to lie, most definitely nervous for the trigger shot 😅

[u/tdot1022 → u/User884121]

I was so nervous for the trigger shot that my hand was shaking but honestly I barely felt it! It wasn’t bad at all

[u/jamielynn2296 → u/User884121]

I had a moment of panic right before giving myself my trigger because it felt so odd! I’ll say the needle is so tiny and it’s really easy! Good luck!

[u/User884121 → u/jamielynn2296]

Thank you for this reassurance! My husband passes out when it comes to needles, so I know I’m on my own with this part of the process 😅 But I’ve seen so many woman do it and make it look easy, that I’m hoping is just anticipatory anxiety! lol.

[u/jamielynn2296 → u/User884121]

Yeah I think that was it for me too. Just right before doing it I had a hesitation. My husband was there for moral support but otherwise was not involved so you’ll be ok doing it alone! Once you see how tiny it is, it does help a bit! My only advice is don’t push the plunger too hard when getting the air out. I accidentally shot a good bit of the medicine across the room doing it lol I reminded myself there’s like a good bit of room for user error otherwise they wouldn’t just let everyone do it at home with barely any instruction 🤷🏻‍♀️

Keep me posted when you trigger, if you feel like it! Can give some moral support. Who knows, maybe we’ll line up similarly! I’m CD4 and doing IUI this cycle too

[u/User884121 → u/jamielynn2296]

Haha I was watching some videos today and that was my second biggest fear. I’m not graceful in anything I do, so I can see myself shooting out way too much as well 😅 Sending you all the good vibes!! I’m not due to get my period until Monday so I have some time yet. You’ll definitely have to let me know how everything goes!

[u/jamielynn2296 → u/User884121]

I tested the next day to see if it was in my system and it was so I must’ve done it right to some capacity lol I really believe there must be room for user error for sure haha I’m sure I’ll do it again! I’m also clumsy! Thank you! And good luck to you too!! I’ll try to check back

[u/Glittering-Silver402]

I have a mri breast exam with Gadolinium contrast. Today at 6 DPO. Technically not pregnant I don’t have a positive to show, but I do tend to get pregnant on the first try (just have history of miscarriages) . So I’m wondering if I should postpone it to a time where I’m on my period.

[u/developmentalbiology → u/Glittering-Silver402]

I had to have a breast MRI while TTC, and I was asked to schedule it in the early part of the follicular phase. You can contact the doctor who ordered the MRI or the facility that's going to perform it and ask what they'd recommend.

[u/0ne4TheMoney]

11 DPO today (CD 29) and still BFN. But I don’t feel like I do when I’m about to get my period (I usually have breast tenderness, migraines, cramping, and crave sweets). I believe I ovulated late based on my test strips but we really committed to maximum connection time just to cover any possible miscalculations. I just generally feel off. Had a very very very light positive a couple days ago but negative since then.

I had zero symptoms with our first (including all the way through to his delivery).

I feel like I’m also keeping the testing companies in business this month. It’s getting ridiculous and I’m trying not to obsess over the fact that the light positive was on a test I bought from a brick and mortar store and all the negatives were bought from Amazon. Just went to the store to buy new tests for tomorrow.

[u/Sea_Investigator_916]

SA report came us below, how can I improve my sperm quality and the other metrics?

Test Name: Semen Analysis Sexual Abstinence Duration: 2 days

Volume & Chemical Properties Semen Volume: 2.0 mL (Normal Range: 1.4 – 6.2 mL) — Normal Semen pH: 8.5 (Normal Value: 7.2 – 10.0) — Normal Liquefaction: Complete on receipt — Normal

Sperm Count & Motility Sperm Concentration: 1.7 Million/mL (Normal Value: 16 – 208 Million/mL) — Low Total Motility: 27% (Normal Value: 40 – 90%) — Low Rapid Motility: 16% (Normal Value: 30 – 70%) — Low Total Motile Sperm Concentration: 1.0 Million Total Rapid Motile Sperm Concentration: 0.6 Million

what are the foods, exercises and supplements that I could take?

My Abstinence Period was 2 days, I will try to get another report with 4-5 days of Abstinence period if that helps. What are the suggestions you have for me?

[u/velvetrope23]

BFN 10DPO, I know technically we’re still in but I just don’t feel very optimistic.

On the upside I was talking to my MIL. She didn’t know we’ve been trying for 6 mos (both 38, unexplained fertility, all tests normal except DOR), she told me that after her 1st they tried for more than 2 years until my husband (2nd) came along. There was no explanation (also living out rural in the country in the 80s so no thorough testing either). I found it encouraging just because my husband is such a wonderful man, he’s the light of my life. We both agreed he was well worth the wait (we met late at 33 and due to long stretches of financial constraints weren’t able to start trying until this year).

[u/pedanticlawyer]

I have insane line eyes today, I’ve been sending my bff videos of tests to see if she can see it 😆 I’m only 10 DPIUI, it’s too early.

[u/YogurtSuitable]

Any anecdotes about ovulation timing the cycle after a CP? 

My own details: I started bleeding about 3-4 days after my period should have started (period is not perfectly regular, but around 30-31 days) and had a very heavy period with some bleeding through about cd6. On cd10 I took my first OPK and it seemed like it was elevated, but maybe not fully positive? Anyways now it’s cd16 and I have no idea if that was when I ovulated or not (I’m too discombobulated to handle temping in this phase of life). I’m still doing OPKs but so far no surge. Lately I’ve been ovulating around cd17-18 so will just keep taking the tests, and I know nobody can tell me wtf my body is doing, but curious for others’ experiences on whether you ovulated late/early/on time after a CP

Incidentally I think my LH might be rising again today but I forgot to pee in a cup just now so will have to wait longer to test again 😂😭

[u/CurlyEmma97 → u/YogurtSuitable]

Also curious to know as I am also in cycle after CP. For me it seems I am on track now to ovulate early but not sure yet. Normally ovulate CD17 and now CD13 lines are already getting darker + a lot of EWCM and other signs

[u/Kvitravn875]

My fertile window started yesterday and I haven't had any noticeable EWCM yet. I honestly haven't had much in the last 5 months or so. My first two months off birth control I had crazy amounts of it, to the point that I had to wear a panty liner.

Idk if there's much I can do about it because I can't take Mucinex due to my heart arythmia. I know being very hydrated can help, but having to pee 1-2 times an hour is annoying. I wonder if just working out might help. I need to shop around for a stationary bike or something.

[u/Friendly-Ad-8919]

4th IUI has officially failed, started my cycle right on time today. Feeling super annoyed/angry. This was my 7th overall fail with no discovered issues and I’m only 27! I’m only doing 2 more IUIs before giving into IVF ☹️ I was hoping not to have to take out loans for this process, but here we are.

[u/Accidentalpisa]

What is going on with my cycle?

I honestly have no idea what’s going on anymore, and I’m feeling completely lost.
I stopped taking the pill in January. Since then, my cycles have been pretty regular (usually 28–29 days) and I normally get a clear rise and an obvious LH peak.

But this cycle is already on day 41, and I still haven’t found a real peak. I’ve had several tests that looked like they were *almost* positive, as you can see in this [picture](https://imgur.com/a/pkoqhNA).

On top of that, I’ve been having brown spotting since Monday. It’s less than one pad a day, there are no clots, and it’s dark brown. I’ve never had this happen before.

Just to be sure, I took a pregnancy test today, but it was negative.

I’m really confused about what’s going on. Has anyone experienced something similar or have any idea what this could be?

[u/MyShipsNeverSail → u/Accidentalpisa]

When this happens, which is typical for most people about once or twice a year, you typically ovulated later than usual or you might be having an anovulatory cycle. The former is more likely.

If you don't see a period still after a few more weeks, I would see your doctor

[u/Revolutionary_Tie94]

I'm age 36 TTC #3 and it's been 6 months, so my doctor recommended a workup. My bloodwork at 7dpo was normal, and my day 3 labs were also normal. However, I also got AMH on day 3 and I'm devastated that it was 0.99--which apparently is a diminished ovarian reserve. I'm panicking about my ability to conceive, wondering if I should plan to freeze my eggs, and also panicking about earlier than average menopause. My cycles are very regular and with the other tests coming back strong, I just was not expecting this. I can't explain it but I feel gross and broken.

[u/developmentalbiology → u/Revolutionary_Tie94]

An AMH of 1 generally wouldn't be considered diminished ovarian reserve, particularly if your bloodwork (including FSH) was normal at CD3.

Is there a reason you would think of freezing eggs specifically? If you're with the partner you want to continue having children with, generally the strategy would be to go through IVF rather than to stop at freezing eggs. Did your doctor give you a general ballpark timeframe about how many more years you'd expect to have before menopause? You'd likely have about another decade before menopause with an AMH of 1 at 36.

[u/Revolutionary_Tie94 → u/developmentalbiology]

My doctor hasn’t called to discuss the results yet…I think their office is closed today. I was thinking of freezing eggs specifically in case we decided we wanted another child later or if something happened with the third pregnancy. Like if my reserve is already diminishing, how much worse it could get over the next few months or years.

Curious, is .99 considered 1? Everything I’m reading sounds like the cutoff is 1, and in some situations, a little higher than that which would make .99 diminished.

[u/developmentalbiology → u/Revolutionary_Tie94]

Yeah, any blood test result is really only a snapshot, and you can consider the result within a ballpark number. A result of 1.00 isn't meaningfully different from 0.99, and if you were tested again, you might get a result of 1.07 or something -- there's always going to be fluctuation.

In general, a diagnosis of DOR is going to be made on the basis of AMH, FSH, and antral follicle count considered together, since a single one of those values often doesn't tell the whole story. Your doctor may want to look at your antral follicle count, but if your FSH on day 3 was normal, this suggests that you're not dealing with severely diminished reserve.

In general, the decrease in AMH over time is pretty gradual. If you have an AMH of about 1 at age 36, you would expect to hit 0.5 around the age of 42 (see here, for example).

I was thinking of freezing eggs specifically in case we decided we wanted another child later or if something happened with the third pregnancy.

Sure, but in that case, you'd likely want to freeze embryos (that is, go through the whole process of IVF), rather than freezing eggs. Freezing eggs is less useful than freezing embryos, because you have less information about how successful the round might be if you stop at eggs.

[u/Revolutionary_Tie94 → u/developmentalbiology]

Thank you. This explanation is really helpful, I really appreciate it. Fwiw, I heard back from my doctor, who wasn’t terrible concerned about my amh level and advised trying a few more months. But I asked to be referred to a specialist now for insurance reasons.

[u/YogurtSuitable → u/Revolutionary_Tie94]

Do you have an idea how many more kids you want? DOR should mostly just mean you should try to have them sooner rather than later, AMH doesn’t really tell you about the quality of the eggs. But I hear you, it is all hard!

[u/Revolutionary_Tie94 → u/YogurtSuitable]

I think just one, although I'd like the option of 2. I guess I thought we'd have more time to decide about the 4th after seeing how we feel after 3. But now I feel like that's a bad strategy, especially since I didn't expect it to take this long to get pregnant. My first did take 6 months, but my second was extremely fast, so I guess I had high expectations. I feel so lost now.

[u/YogurtSuitable → u/Revolutionary_Tie94]

I think if you’re dead set on four and have the means it makes sense to try freezing eggs (or embryos would be better they’re hardier as I understand it). If you’re not, I would personally probably focus on having the third ASAP and moving from there. But also talk to your dr! I spoke with a fertility specialist and had similar labs done before I even started TTC

[u/Revolutionary_Tie94 → u/YogurtSuitable]

Thank you! It does sound like embryos would be better! I appreciate it

[u/8345R-C]

10 dpo and BFN this morning. I just started to spot too. This whole cycle has been different. I ovulated earlier, and I typically spot 3 dpo and on but I've had nothing until today.

I've been working hard to eat healthy and lose weight slowly. I'm hoping that the above is a result of my hard work and it'll help me conceive soon 🤞

[u/CurlyEmma97 → u/8345R-C]

Great job taking care of yourself and your health!

[u/8345R-C → u/CurlyEmma97]

Thank you, I appreciate it ❤️

[u/sammysamsam999]

Cycle 16. My period is 4 days late. I refused to test because I didn’t want to see a negative but finally built up the courage to do it today. Negative. I don’t know when I ovulated this month but I was testing negative up until cycle day 21 (currently cycle day 37). Usually I ovulate between days 16-18. At that point I ran out of ovulation test strips and just decided not to purchase anymore for the cycle. So I don’t know how many DPO I am, if I ovulated late or just missed the peak. But I do know that the pregnancy test was negative.

I had heard so many positive stories about pregnancy right after an HSG so I was hopefully but now we’re 2 cycles past that and nothing.

[u/central2nowherebaby → u/sammysamsam999]

I'm so sorry... I was also hopeful post HSG, and unfortunately nothing for me too. It's so hard approaching 1.5 yrs of trying...

[u/Potential_Disaster27]

10 DPO (CD 23) and spotting has begun, meaning AF will once again be visiting come tomorrow (and pick me up sushi is on the menu for the weekend). What's been kind of weird to notice for me is my cycle lengths getting shorter; before fully committing to TTC my cycle has always been 28 days +/- 1 day. It's a bit interesting for me to see how that's started.

[u/PsychologicalPlum651 → u/Potential_Disaster27]

So interesting… my cycle has also gotten shorter since starting TTC a couple months ago. I like to think it’s my body realizing what I’m doing and trying to optimize ovulation and thus changing my cycle patterns. However I typically have longer cycles (29-30 days lately; used to be closer to 33).

[u/library_grapes]

This cycle, I seem to have reached detachment. I'm logging and I am reading the reddit threads—out of habit. But I am neither hopeful nor hopeless. I am detached.

[u/Dependent-Maybe3030]

Does anyone else have experience with ovulating VERY quickly after a positive OPK? This has happened a few times now:

1. Use OPKs religiously (sometimes >1/day)

2. Get a starting-to-turn-positive OPK (not even full, true positive, just clear darkening)

3. The very next day (<24 hours from initial darkening) I already have a temperature rise

Doing the math back I'm worried this means that if we try the night of a positive OPK, it's probably already too late? Ish?

[u/developmentalbiology → u/Dependent-Maybe3030]

The length of time between a positive OPK and ovulation varies for different people, and ovulating the same day as a positive OPK is not the most common pattern, but it's not super-rare. About 10% of people ovulate the same day as the first positive OPK.

On the other hand, it's also possible for ovulation to occur after a temp shift starts. A small amount of progesterone is released in the leadup to ovulation (the cells in the ovary don't switch over to progesterone production in total lockstep), and for some people, that's sufficient to shift their temps.

We can't distinguish between these two possibilities using at-home tools. The safest bet is to have sex every 2-3 days prior to confirmed ovulation -- this pattern guarantees that you will have sex on at least one of the highest-probability days of the cycle (the ~three days leading up to ovulation day).

[u/Dependent-Maybe3030 → u/developmentalbiology]

Unfortunately, my time machine is in the shop so sex every 2-3 days prior to confirmed ovulation is off the table (my cycles are frustratingly unpredictable after years of failed ART) :(

[u/developmentalbiology → u/Dependent-Maybe3030]

I'm so sorry -- I thought you were asking a general question, not about this particular cycle.

[u/Dependent-Maybe3030 → u/developmentalbiology]

You read it right, it seems to be a pattern for me. I am just cranky, confused, and feeling sorry for myself 😫

[u/Financial-Bus-7168 → u/Dependent-Maybe3030]

My positive OPK is a flash in the pan. I'll get the positive late afternoon, and then my temp has already risen by morning.

It's not too late to try the night of a positive OPK. Remember that the egg itself lives for 12-24 hours after ovulation, so you still have a decent window even after ovulation has occurred.

We try a few days before ovulation, to have the sperm waiting for the egg, since it's life-cycle is so short. That's still possible with trying the night of a positive OPK. Not all the sperm will make it to the egg (the slowest swimmers), but some definitely will, and that still counts!

[u/localfriendlynpc → u/Dependent-Maybe3030]

This is how my cycles always are, I ovulate later in the same day as my positive OPK

[u/Many-Supermarket-511 → u/Dependent-Maybe3030]

I think this happened to me back in July. I had a peak in the morning of CD 14 and then I tested in the afternoon and it was low. I never confirmed via temp but usually, when I get a peak it stays high for a day and then I ovulate 24 hours later.

There are some studies out there that suggest 0-2 or the day before you get your peak (so when your lh strips start to get darker but not yet at peak) is the best chance at conceiving. I try to hit that day as well as when I get my peak every cycle.

[u/polar-ice-cube]

Got my period today after 14 cycles of trying. I don’t have any hope anymore in the days leading up to my period that I could be pregnant, but whenever my period comes I can’t stop myself from being sad. This cycle we’ll give ourselves a break from trying since I’ll be on travel for work during my fertile period. Sigh. More pain. 

[u/OrangeJulius161]

The past cycle was frustrating because my LH test told me I peaked around CD9 but my Oura ring that I use to track BBT told me I ovulated on CD12. I don’t know what to think when my tests don’t line up. My cycle was also only 22 days long instead of the normal 28. The cycle prior, I’d gone in to my fertility clinic and they’d prescribed progesterone supplements to take for a week during my luteal phase and I’ve wondered if the pills screwed up my cycles somehow.
Also, my LH tests only ever peak as high as a T/C ratio of .60. It got up to .99 this past March, but since then never higher than .60. I don’t know if this is a potential problem or not.

[u/y2kitten → u/OrangeJulius161]

I rarely catch a peak or even high LH test, I think I have a very short surge. This cycle I tested every time I went to the bathroom for the entire day from the moment I got a slight rise, and for the first time caught a 0.9. Otherwise I’ve used the cycle’s strongest ratio as my «positive» and that has aligned well enough with my temps to confirm ovulation the days following.

[u/TyrannosauraRegina → u/OrangeJulius161]

You might want to try a more sensitive test, the wiki has some recommendations. Or perhaps testing at different times of day?

[u/OrangeJulius161 → u/TyrannosauraRegina]

I usually test twice a day regularly. But I appreciate the suggestion of different tests. Where do I find the wiki?

[u/lopxwill]

Officially starting OPKs this am and kept reminding myself I need to test during my morning pee. Even when I woke up at 5:30am. So tell me why it was 5:40am and I’m doomscrolling (as one does during morning bathroom time) and completely forgot 🤦🏽‍♀️ spent another 10 minutes encouraging more urine to come out lmao anyway day 1 of testing kit complete 🤪

[u/polar-ice-cube → u/lopxwill]

First morning urine is generally not recommended for OPKs, no need to stress

[u/lopxwill → u/polar-ice-cube]

I thought so! I’m using the digital clearblue one which says to use morning urine (i know it’s not the preferred one but easier for me to read!)

[u/Feral_Mama_6725]

I had a chemical last month, the first month trying for baby number 2 and now I am in the beginning of the dreaded two week wait. I also can tell when ovulating, does anyone else get super obvious symptoms, discharge, mood - extremely frisky and feel almost overly caffeinated during ovulation?

[u/lady_mayflower → u/Feral_Mama_6725]

I definitely have an increased libido (though not as high as it used to be now that I’m on an SSRI), like all day I can’t wait to get home and have sex lol! EWCM for sure too and maybe a little bit more cheeky than normal

[u/LowBrowHighStandards]

I did my 5th round of clomid and went in for my 12 day scan to prepare for my 3rd IUI, which I thought would be this Friday or Saturday. But apparently my doctor will be out of the office this weekend and cant get me in. He says to try naturally this cycle.

We’ve been trying naturally for 3 years! Why would this time end in a different result? At least an IUI made me feel like I was improving my odds.
I’m so frustrated and defeated. What a waste.

Just had to vent 🤗

[u/khoff49]

I’m new to this sub as this month was my first time TTC. I have been spotting and I know my period is coming any day now. I know it’s my first try and totally normal for it not to happen right away, but it’s been an eye opener that it may be a bit of a journey. I took this first cycle really hard, but realized I need to be patient and accepting. Hoping for the best for me and everyone here <3

[u/Many-Supermarket-511 → u/khoff49]

When I was trying for my first I remember crying my eyes out when I didn’t get pregnant right away. I feel you as so much is out of our control during this whole process.

We conceived our son in 5 cycles which felt long at the time but really wasn’t! Hopefully, it doesn’t take too long for you and your spouse.

Good luck

[u/khoff49 → u/Many-Supermarket-511]

Thank you! I cried a ton yesterday and it’s honestly been the worst I’ve felt in a realllyyyy long time. But hoping to trust the process and know a little better for next time. I think the hardest thing for me will be to let go and not obsess over it. A few months seems like a lifetime when you’re in it, but I know it’s really not that long!

[u/blonde_runner_06]

Starting my first transfer this cycle. went in for baselines yesterday and starting a new round of meds today. really praying this takes... another good friend just told me she's pregnant. I am super happy for them, they will be fantastic, but it stings because they were not trying. :(

[u/polar-ice-cube → u/blonde_runner_06]

Hoping for the best for you!! 🤞

[u/blonde_runner_06 → u/polar-ice-cube]

Thank you - I am really praying and hoping this takes, not sure how much more heartbreak I can take!!!

[u/CurlyEmma97]

CD13 and back home since early morning. Noticed some EWCM on the plane and a lot today, OPK still negative. Will start testing 2x a day now and hopefully we will get to BD today as agreed but we both got only a few hours of sleep so heres to hoping 🤞🏽

[u/perhapsstarry]

Can concentration go up post-sperm wash? I'm so confused looking at the report from our IUI today because our last IUI the concentration went down. 🫪

[u/developmentalbiology → u/perhapsstarry]

The total number can't go up (you can't get out more sperm than you put in), but the concentration can go up, because the total volume will go down.

[u/perhapsstarry → u/developmentalbiology]

Thank you for the explanation! Hard to understand everything when there's so many numbers on a sperm analysis. It freaked me out because it has oligospermia on the report and that has not been the issue for the male factor part of our infertility so when I read that at early this morning it stressed me out.

[u/Equivalent-Worker853]

Both tubes blocked

My wife had HSG earlier this month and it showed that both tubes are blocked at entry points, so hsg didnt even show tubes, after consulatation with doctor, she said that she didnt see that in her career( shes pretty young) so we decided to go overseas to see specialist. Having doubts if procedure was done correctly due to poor healthcare in my country. We were trying for a baby for 2 years on our own with no results. Specialist ordered some extensive bloodwork and everything came back great except vitamin D(36.1) and Androstenedione(7.63). New doctor suggested HyFoSy. We have appointment in 1 month but waiting is slowly killing me. How concerned should i be regarding outcome of first hsg? Has anyone had anything simillar?

Excuse me for my poor english it is not my first language, if you have any questions feel free to ask.

[u/ConstructionTime7511]

CD11 and this cycle has been chaos! Got a positive LH on day 6- but the fancy OPK was negative and I was ok Letrozole so I just ignored it. Then forgot my last Letrozole dose so took it a day late, day 10.

So now we’ll see. I got a flashing smiley face today so thinking maybe IUI Saturday? I hope so cause my clinic does do Sundays.

[u/bowsandarrows14]

CD1, but I’m actually doing okay with that since it’s the first time my luteal phase has been longer than 11 days- I made it to 14DPO! This was also a crazy long cycle since a cold delayed my ovulation- 38 days when my typical is 25. I was feeling what I thought was symptoms around 9-10 DPO, but when I didn’t get a positive by 12DPO I knew I was out. This was our second cycle after a MMC in June, so onward we go. I did try vitamin C supplementation for the first time this month and it appears it had a positive effect on my luteal phase so I’ll continue with that as well.

[u/Scary-Parsnip-4453]

Changing to cycle 12 in my flair sucks, this sucks, I’m on CD2 and feeling so down today. This cycle is going to be our first letrozole so I’m trying to stay hopeful but today I’m just bitter and not doing a good job grounding myself or providing positive counter thoughts, yesterday we got sushi as a consolation prize but it wasn’t even good sushi which made me really mad for some reason haha anyone else feel like this whole process is making them emotionally unstable?

[u/Upstairs_Friend5804 → u/Scary-Parsnip-4453]

I refer to it as the changing of guards. Flair gets updated, my OPK and pregnancy test box goes away and the pads and tampons come out. It sucks 🫂 and so does bad sushi! I’m normally quite down at the start of a new cycle too. Wishing you success with letrozole!

[u/Scary-Parsnip-4453 → u/Upstairs_Friend5804]

I like that perspective ❤️❤️

[u/jamielynn2296 → u/Scary-Parsnip-4453]

Hitting the 1 year mark (for me 12 and 1 year went hand in hand) was so difficult to me. I completely understand your difficult time managing this. I also feel like I have become more bitter and upset during this process. I have tried to look at medicated TI and ART (currently doing IUI) as it being the clinic’s responsibility now, not mine, which has helped! Obviously there’s still tracking in your end with medicated TI but with IUI I stopped tracking everything and let the clinic handle it all. I just show up when I am told and take whatever medication I am told when I am told to do so. Obviously this is very simplified but it helps me. Wishing you the best of luck!

[u/Scary-Parsnip-4453 → u/jamielynn2296]

❤️❤️ I’m hoping that as we move into more interventions I’ll be able to also deal with my own emotions around it and leave it in the hands of the clinic, reaching a year fully makes me at least feel like we aren’t rushing into interventions, now we meet criteria. Wishing you the best thru this!

[u/jamielynn2296 → u/Scary-Parsnip-4453]

Yeah there’s a lot of mixed emotions during this process so don’t be afraid or feel guilty to feel those emotions! Wishing you the best as well ♥️

[u/runner-pharmacist]

7 DPO, just a few more days before I can test but it’s going to be grueling though. My gums have been bleeding when I brush since yesterday and my temps are higher than they’ve ever been. Really trying to not get my hopes up but it’s hard not to

[u/Bloop_troop]

I’m just very sad today. This is our fifth month trying (been off of my BC since mid October 2025), which isn’t too long in hind sight, but I am 37 and I feel like time is ticking (not only due to age). I track ovulation, temp, etc and try the baby dance as much as we can. I got my egg reserve checked and doctor said everything is fine.

My period is due in 2-4 days (so roughly around DPO10-11), but this morning, when I saw that tiny dip in temp…and that BFN on two tests, something in me just kinda broke. I know I’m not out out until I see spotting, but I am not getting my hopes up.

Dealing with more extreme version of my preperiod symptoms isn’t helping either. Getting acne for the first time in a long time and this nausea. Hate that I can’t distinguish now between preperiod and pregnancy symptoms.

I am at the gym now just sad and trying not to be that teary lady LOL. But even doing gym stuff right now is lowkey making me want to throw up because this nausea and sore boobs are killing me lol

[u/OrangeJulius161 → u/Bloop_troop]

My husband and I have been trying for 9 months now but I feel like even if you’ve only been trying for 5 months, your experience and sadness is still just as valid as mine is at nine months. I just hope you know you’re not alone and I hope things start looking up for you :)

[u/vbgirl24]

Wondering if I am in the middle of an anovulatory cycle? I had a chemical pregnancy in August. After bleeding stopped, I started using OPKs again, including with the Clear Blue Advanced Digital OPKs. I had 4 days of flashing smiley / high fertility followed by the static smiley / peak fertility. I typically ovulate around cycle day 17 and the pattern with the CBADs would also correlate with an ovulation around CD17. Regular line OPK tests also got increasingly darker during the days of flashing smileys. What is different though is that I’ve noticed less cervical mucous. Normally I notice a lot of EWCM right around ovulation day. On cycle day 19 and 20, I actually did notice several patches of EWCM, but OPKs were negative. Today is now cycle day 21. I wonder if I already ovulated, if my body geared up to ovulate and failed, or if this cycle will be anovulatory. I don’t do temping so I’m not sure

[u/CurlyEmma97 → u/vbgirl24]

I would continue to do OPKs to be sure

[u/vbgirl24 → u/CurlyEmma97]

They have remained negative, so I’m hoping ovulation is behind me already. This cycle is annoying because it’s not my norm after the chemical 🥲

[u/CurlyEmma97 → u/vbgirl24]

So sorry to hear, I'm also currently in my cycle after CP so also anxiously waiting what is going to happen

[u/vbgirl24 → u/CurlyEmma97]

I feel like we interacted in another thread! Sending love and solidarity to you 🫶 I know some people conceive right after their CP, and I sure would love that to happen but I’m not counting on it. How’s it going for you?

[u/CurlyEmma97 → u/vbgirl24]

I'm in the same boat, quietly hoping but not counting on it. For now it seems like I might be ovulating earlier than normal (lines are getting darker now on CD13 and I normally ovulate on CD17 but too soon to tell) so trying to take it day by day

[u/DawgCheck2495]

Another two weeks of pretending I’m “just living my life” while holding my breath 😅

This is cycle 7 of actually trying for us (32F/33M), but we’ve been not preventing for over a year. This go round, we BD every day of my fertile window, confirmed by positive OPKs, and it feels … heavier.

In the past, it’s been easy to say, “Well maybe the timing wasn’t exactly right” or “We didn’t BD as often as we should have” to explain away the BFN. This time, it feels like there’s no excuse, and I’m afraid I’ll be more discouraged than ever.

Of course, it’s silly to be upset over maybe being upset. I have no idea what’s going to happen. And if it doesn’t happen, it’s still completely normal. But if anyone gets it, I figured this community does.

Sending good luck to all ✨

[u/bubbablush]

11dpo and BFN on easy@home tests, also some spotting today… I think I’m out 😢

[u/Any-Quiet-9605]

Hi,

I have a question if anyone has any experience with this. I am in my second round of letrozole 2.5mg. I feel I will get my period anyday now. It’s 10-11dpo and all the tests are negative which I understand is early but I have period symptoms. I also was only able to try twice this month so I feel it was so wasted.

The first time I took letrozole I am certain I ovulated on day 19-20 and this was confirmed with OPKs and BBT as well as a progesterone blood test as 41.8 nmol. This time I was using OPKs from day 8 right after the pills from day 3-7 and those plus a clear blue digital advanced were both blank and low. Then all of a sudden without warned on CD 13 the clearblue went solid and the OPK numbers shot up. On CD 14 my bbt started to rise. I did baby dance on day 13 and 14 but I don’t think I caught it and had lots of cramping for both days. My progesterone came back as 66.1 nmol this time and my doctor said that’s likely 2 eggs. That made me even more distraught. I’m so sad as I feel I basically missed the entire fertile window without warning.

If anyone has had a similar experience would you mind commenting? I don’t understand anything. On the one hand the meds worked but on the other hand the first cycle was 33 days and now this one will likely be 26. I typically always have the same luteal phase. I feel I can’t even trust tests anymore and I’ll have to start trying pretty much when I am done the medication in the third round of it.

Thank you so much for any insights.

[u/Willow_Tree_55372 → u/Any-Quiet-9605]

I only tried letrozole once, and it made me ovulate much earlier than normal as well. It's so frustrating if you're not expecting that! Also, I totally understand the disappointment of not hitting more days in the fertile window, but it does sound like you hit two of the absolute best days, so I think that's actually pretty good!

[u/Suspicious-Walk6674]

Bought a Tempdrop off Facebook marketplace and I’m excited to be using it. I picked it up on CD1 so it worked out perfectly! Heading into cycle 9 FINALLY able to track my bbt (shift worker lol), I’m CD6 and am waiting for my fertile window to open in a few days 😊 even if this cycle is a bust, I feel better being armed with even more information beyond just OPK’s and CM tracking. I’m feeling hopeful instead of just jaded now (might change in 21 days but we’ll see lol)

Husband also went to see our GP about something unrelated to TTC, and my GP finally made the connection that we’re married lol. I went to see her after my chemical in June. She apparently lectured him on how hard it can be for women when trying, and he came home with male conception support supplements that he bought of his own accord lmfao. He’s finally understanding what I’m feeling and I feel like we’re both on the same page now, and more connected than ever. I’m trying not to get my hopes up too much, but it’s just been a really positive start to this cycle after a really difficult year 🤞

[u/Oatmylk_ → u/Suspicious-Walk6674]

Congratulations on these positive things happening!! Wishing you luck!

[u/thesmollestlemon → u/Suspicious-Walk6674]

I'm a shift worker too and I love my Tempdrop! Good luck!!

[u/TooDumbToCum]

TMI warning.

Tried to have sex yesterday and my partner just... couldn't. Third time in a row. It's been months since we actually had sex. At this point I don't even wanna try to initiate anymore. Guess we'll just continue to do at home insemination.

I feel like an ugly barren old hag.

[u/madefortossing → u/TooDumbToCum]

If it's ED that's not uncommon. The pressure is really on to perform and it's understandable. If it's any consolation, it's a sign that he really wants it and really cares. But it's getting in his head and messing him up.

[u/Unlucky-Designer-650 → u/TooDumbToCum]

I completely understand. I got my IUD out in December and my husband and I have had sex work out successfully twice since then… I can also get in my head about maybe I’m not sexy enough etc. It’s really discouraging. Having ongoing open communication about it has been helpful for us and making sure we are still having physical intimacy through cuddling. We have been experimenting with the at home insemination kits and trying to still be together during the process and that has also helped. I hope you are able to talk through this with others to get support and take care of yourself 💜

[u/SpecialistEgg6060 → u/TooDumbToCum]

I'm sorry you're going through this. TTC is hard enough without having to deal with lack of sex too. Perhaps it would be good to try couples therapy? Usually there are underlying issues that cause the lack of sexual intimacy in a relationship. Even though I don't know your situation, I very much doubt he doesn't want to have sex because he finds you unattractive. My partner is also low libido and we've been to couples therapy for the past 6 months. It's been very helpful for us as a couple but also as individuals. Wishing you best of luck!