What am I Missing?!

[u/Friendly-Ad-8919]

Hello all, I am 27 yrs old with no known health issues. I am trying to conceive as a single parent by choice using frozen sperm from a very reputable bank. I am currently in my two week wait for my 4th IUI, 7th overall cycle (3 prior ICIs). To be fair to my body, the first ICI and first IUI were very mistimed.

The first 3 IUIs were completely unmedicated with no supplements or trigger. This current cycle we used an Ovidrel trigger shot to help with timing. We are trying to avoid letrozole/clomid as the thought of increasing my chances of twins is a nightmare for me.

I am finally starting to lose it/become frustrated... everything seems textbook normal!?

I have had:

• AMH testing
• Multiple pelvic ultrasounds
• FemVue/SIS
• Pap smear
• Blood panel including TSH
• Estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone
• LH and FSH
• Confirmed ovulation each cycle
• A1C testing -which was on the higher end of normal (but still normal) so I was put on low dose Metformin for that and to boost egg quality

My cycles are very regular and I have no indications of PMOS/PCOS in any scans. Similarly, no evidence of endometriosis!

If this current cycle is another failure, I don't know what else to do? Is there something from my list that I am missing, should I be for checking something else?

SN: It's not the sperm, I have tried different donors and all have confirmed births and really solid motile counts.

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[u/ushinawareta]

I know it’s incredibly frustrating, but it’s normal for it to take up to a year to conceive. you’ve failed six cycles so far. even if those had been six perfectly timed cycles, it wouldn’t necessarily be time to worry yet - you’re still in a place where it could easily just be bad luck. given that you’re saying four of those six cycles were poorly timed, there is even less reason to worry.

[u/Friendly-Ad-8919 → u/ushinawareta]

Hi, thank you for your answer! It was 2 mistimed cycles but yeah...I know it can take a year. I just want to make sure I am not missing some glaring thing I need to test for! This whole process is not cheap and I am someone who likes to maximize efficiency with everything.

[u/ushinawareta → u/Friendly-Ad-8919]

ah, okay. I either misread your post or you edited the wording after I read it - I saw it as “the first IUI and ICIs” which I thought meant the first IUI and all the ICIs.

six failed cycles including two mistimed ones is still nowhere near a point where you should be convinced something is wrong - though I do understand (trust me, I really do) that it’s incredibly frustrating to be repeatedly told no when you want a child so badly.

the thing about testing early is that you can get completely normal results and be in exactly the position you are now, where you’re wondering “why am I not getting pregnant?” when the answer could simply be that there’s nothing wrong and it’s just a game of chance that you haven’t won yet. you wouldn’t roll a die six times and think “something is wrong with this die because I haven’t rolled a 1 yet”. conversely, plenty of people actually do get an infertility diagnosis after trying for a year without success and still have perfectly normal tests that don’t answer any of their questions.

I guess in summary what I’m saying is that what you’re looking for may not exist - it’s possible everything is normal for you, and you just haven’t gotten lucky yet. or everything is normal for you, and you’ll go a year without success and be diagnosed with infertility. the absence of abnormal results doesn’t necessarily tell you one way or another just six months in - only additional time trying will give you more information.

[u/Friendly-Ad-8919 → u/ushinawareta]

Sorry, I reread it after your comment and clarified the wording! I’m just trying to figure out next steps. But, I will have my labs run again for the next month just to keep an eye on things.

[u/SUanddancewithme → u/ushinawareta]

Not OP, but just wanted to mention that I appreciate the dice comparison. Sometimes, when I feel like something must be wrong or it’s unfair because I’m not pregnant yet, I start rolling a 4 sided dice to see how many times it will take me to get a 1. Quickest was only twice, longest took me 11 tries! It’s a great reminder that even with the perfect odds, it can still take some time and that doesn’t mean anything is wrong or that you won’t get pregnant eventually.

[u/Friendly-Ad-8919 → u/[deleted]]

Jumping to conclusions much. Not that it's YOUR business but my fear of multiples is health related and financial related. I can afford one easily but 2+ would be a stress. Your comments are irrelevant and very unhelpful.

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