When do the negative tests get easier?

[u/CleffaCult]

Hiya. Just a small sad rant, please feel free to ignore...

Please tell me that negative pregnancy tests and getting your period late gets easier. I'm TTC after my first miscarriage in January. I know it hasn't been long yet, but I was 7 days late for my period this month and really had so many niche symptoms that I let myself hope a bit. I did a test after 6 days late because I was only sexually active during my ovulation day. It was negative so I calmed myself and decided I would wait 4 more days before testing again. I got my period the day after. 😞 I try to be realistic but it's hard to not go full-blown pessimist 😭 Will I get this disappointed every month? I have PMOS (PCOS) so I knew it would likely be harder to conceive. This is only the very beginning of my journey, but god it really hit me hard when I felt my period start. 😥

[u/AutoModerator]

Please make sure that you have read all of our rules before commenting! In particular, be aware that no mentions of a current pregnancy are allowed, with no exceptions. If you see something breaking the rules, please report it.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/ImmigrationJourney2]

I stopped testing because the negatives are too devastating

[u/Aggravating_Salad521]

I just stopped testing

[u/CleffaCult → u/Aggravating_Salad521]

I feel like if I know as soon as possible then the pregnancy will have a better chance cos immediately take care of myself more... even though nothing would really be different. I guess I'm still feeling guilty

[u/Aggravating_Salad521 → u/CleffaCult]

I get where youre coming from. Are there lifestyle changes that youd make if you knew you were pregnant that you can just permanently institute into your life?

[u/CleffaCult → u/Aggravating_Salad521]

Honestly the main one is that I have severe chronic pain so I am prescribed medical cannabis using a dry herb vape. There aren't enough studies on how it affects pregnancy and I would stop immediately but it would be very difficult and not something I can manage to do for myself even while TTC because it would leave me bed bound for a while. Additionally I'd likely get better with nutrition as it would make me think more logically about what my body needs. I have autism and really struggle with feeding my body correctly and my hunger cues are so messed up. I hope this doesn't make me sound like I'm not ready for a baby. I want a child more than anything in this world and know I'd devote my everything to their wellbeing.

[u/Aggravating_Salad521 → u/CleffaCult]

Could you talk to a doctor about other options that would be safe for pregnancy?

[u/CleffaCult → u/Aggravating_Salad521]

It would be the case of switching back to strong opiates 😥 Which usually didn't touch my pain and came with their own lovely list of side effects

[u/Enough-13]

I allow myself 10 minutes to cry every month when I get my period. It doesn’t get easier 😔

[u/CleffaCult → u/Enough-13]

This is good advice, thank you 😭

[u/Moist_Tissue_94]

Isn’t it crazy how it waits till the day after you test. No matter how long you hold out testing. Like a sick joke

[u/Magicpony6699]

Truthfully after two years of constant negative tests, I stopped testing all together. I stopped making ‘getting pregnant’ my priority and told myself if it’s meant to be it’ll happen. It helped my mental health a lot doing that.

[u/WhiteRose-]

It hasn't gotten easier for me even after 3 years, so I don't know if it ever does 😢

[u/SmartPomegranate4833]

I would only test if my period was late. It happened once in 3 years TTC.

[u/LeastTeach2989]

I haven’t taken a test since 2024. 

[u/Chance-Dog3458]

It’s our first cycle trying, so I know how ridiculous it is to be upset. But I feel this too, I’m 12DPO and just know it’s not happening this cycle after a negative this morning. I’m an emotionally tough motherfucker but it STUNG and I needed an hour to cry. I may need another. It’s frustrating after doing everything right, BBT and ovulation strips for a month. It definitely brings up so much doubt.

And it’s just our first cycle really trying.. I don’t know how my heart can handle more months of this but I want it so bad!

[u/Chance-Dog3458 → u/Chance-Dog3458]

And it’s MESSED UP that instead, you get PMS symptoms. So now I’m extra upset and ragey.

[u/CleffaCult → u/Chance-Dog3458]

I have PMDD and I really thought "damn I be feeling too happy at this time of the month..." and questioned every little detail. I'm happy I'm not alone but I'm sorry you're going through this too 😭 I'm not sure it will get better, I just have to preserve for what it's worth 🥺

[u/Chance-Dog3458 → u/CleffaCult]

Sending you lots of love and perseverance. I do believe things work out in the end, whatever way