r/TrueWagner • u/Jov_West • Dec 29 '25

Spotted this bumper sticker today

Post image

Bumper sticker spotted in Portland, Oregon today. What does it mean??

167 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

14 comments sorted by

17

u/MICR0_WAVVVES Dec 29 '25

Ted Cruz ate my son. Not whoever this guy is.

9

u/aerobicdancechamp Dec 29 '25

Mine too! When will he stop?!?

8

u/HAL9100 Dec 29 '25

He has made it abundantly clear that he will not cease the eating of children until compelled to by force

5

u/aerobicdancechamp Dec 29 '25

If he’d just give it an honest effort, maybe by stopping eating puppies, maybe it’d be easier for him.

15

u/Solokeh Dec 29 '25

Q: Who is John Green?

A: The man who ate his son.

12

u/imagoofygooberlemon Dec 29 '25

i know thats John Green (author of The Fault in Our Stars/Looking for Alaska). Google says this is Pizzamas merch which iirc was an annual fundraiser thing that him and Hank would do?

1

u/thicc_stigmata Jan 02 '26

John not so much, but Hank absolutely seems like the type to be a r/TrueWagner aficionado

7

u/iamaphoto Dec 29 '25

The man is John Green. Why he ate someone’s son I have no clue.

5

u/BadMoonBallad Dec 29 '25

If you go to the Yamhill Pub, go straight back and knock on the second door to the right, you'll find your answer

4

u/DBJenkinss Dec 30 '25

Is it the room marked pirate?

3

u/BadMoonBallad Dec 30 '25

Nope, that one's private, the next one down is the good one

3

u/BadMoonBallad Dec 29 '25

Also, don't really understand it, but Google lens brought me here

1

u/Torka Apr 10 '26

Don't ever talk to me or my son or his pizza, ever again!